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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00I am a haunted house, and she is the ghost in the attic, turning on lights, stomping
00:00:23on the floor, and making herself known in every reflection I see.
00:00:29She's there, she's always there, to remind me of how lonely the world can be, to remind
00:00:37me that we are all fragile.
00:00:40I am there, with her, up those stairs, sitting in the dark, planning our future together.
00:00:48A future we will never have, a future I will never deserve.
00:00:56I am an exorcist, purging her with pigment.
00:01:03If there was one thing you could change about your life, what would it be?
00:01:23One thing?
00:01:25One thing's all I get?
00:01:28One thing's all I get, I don't want to play this game.
00:01:35I want to be President of the United States.
00:01:38That's right.
00:01:40That way I can declare a state of anarchy.
00:01:44I want to be a movie star, a big fucking movie star, live in a big fucking house, make big
00:01:53fucking movies.
00:01:58I want to be the love child of Sid Vicious and Molly Ringwald.
00:02:07I don't want to sit up all night in an all-night diner and order nothing.
00:02:13I want to be God, for the sole purpose of saying, I brought you into this world, don't
00:02:17think for one minute I won't take you out.
00:02:24I want the original promise.
00:02:28I want justice for all.
00:02:32I want love, hate, ups and downs, and everything in between, for nothing in return.
00:02:45I want the world in my palm, no cooler than 60 degrees, no warmer than 75, and never a
00:02:55cloud in the sky.
00:02:58I want the perfect kiss, the perfect imperfection, the perfect life.
00:03:10But more than anything, I want someone who wants what I want.
00:03:16And I want her to walk through that door right over there, and order biscuits and gravy.
00:03:29Hi.
00:03:30Hi.
00:03:30Hi.
00:03:31I bet your kids are adorable.
00:03:37Oh, it's OK, I already know what I want.
00:03:39OK.
00:03:40I'll have the biscuits and gravy, please.
00:03:42Same.
00:03:43OK, two biscuits and gravy, anything to drink?
00:03:46Coffee's fine.
00:03:46All right.
00:03:47Thanks.
00:03:49I'm Brian.
00:03:51Bella.
00:03:52Nice to meet you, Bella.
00:03:54She blew into my life like a storm, uprooting everything I knew to be true, and filling it with so much more.
00:04:02She became everything I never knew I wanted in a single glance, in a moment, in a straight conversation.
00:04:12And that slight smile that started with the curling of her toes and ended at the corner of her lips, just before she burst into laughter, she became it.
00:04:25She became perfection.
00:04:33So.
00:04:34So.
00:04:35Morrissey or The Cure?
00:04:37The Cure, yeah.
00:04:39Beatles or Stones?
00:04:40The Stones.
00:04:41King of Pop or King of Rock?
00:04:44King of Rock, definitely.
00:04:47Well, Elvis is always fascinating.
00:04:49How so?
00:04:50Well, here's this normal guy that accidentally got famous.
00:04:53I mean, he wrote a song that was for his dad or his uncle or something like that for their birthday.
00:04:59And the next thing you know, he's a teen idol.
00:05:03Watching his life is like watching a tree grow.
00:05:07It gets bigger and bigger.
00:05:08And then he ends up swollen and yellow.
00:05:15It's like he was on a satellite somewhere in outer space, watching himself.
00:05:20And that's what it did to him.
00:05:23You're saying that Elvis was an alien?
00:05:26Hello, darling.
00:05:27This is Elvis from the planet Graceland.
00:05:29I just want to thank you for coming out on a date with me this evening.
00:05:35You know what I like about you?
00:05:36What's that?
00:05:37You're full of shits.
00:05:40I think I just got a little on my shirt.
00:05:42Oh, I apologize.
00:05:44Sorry about that.
00:05:45You better be.
00:05:48To Elvis?
00:05:49To Elvis.
00:05:52Elvis, yellow and swollen.
00:05:56How could I have known even then, in a moment of such happiness, the longitude and latitude of my fall from Graceland?
00:06:06Hours went by.
00:06:08Day turns to night, night to day.
00:06:11Small talk turns to talk of dreams and aspirations.
00:06:16First date eyes become the eyes that you take for granted.
00:06:23I hang on every word she says.
00:06:26And those hours that became days become weeks.
00:06:30And we were married on a Saturday.
00:06:34And those weeks became months.
00:06:36And Cole, our first daughter, was born, sweet as sugar.
00:06:41And those months became a year.
00:06:43And that year became four years.
00:06:46And Sarah, our second daughter, was born.
00:06:50Born sick.
00:06:52And that sickness drove Bella into darkness.
00:06:54And she began to wither and die.
00:06:59And me, I became Elvis, yellow and swollen, watching my life unfold from a satellite somewhere in space.
00:07:12Shining the rings of my tree.
00:07:15And forever wondering how this perfect life came to be.
00:07:22Daddy, can you help me?
00:07:42Yeah, I'll be right there, honey.
00:07:52I love you.
00:08:17Whoa!
00:08:23Yay!
00:08:25Well, I think you got dog poo in your hair.
00:08:28Did I?
00:08:29Yeah!
00:08:31Yuck, where did you get the dog poo in your hair?
00:08:36Here, I think we need to wash it out.
00:08:38Okay, then let's wash it out.
00:08:43Alright, here we go.
00:08:44Here, turn over.
00:08:47Lean back.
00:08:48Lean back.
00:08:49There we go.
00:08:50No, you want to lean back.
00:08:51No, the other way.
00:08:52Because if you lean back, then I won't be able to dress.
00:08:54Hold my hands.
00:08:55Hold my hands.
00:08:56Hold her hands.
00:08:57Lean back.
00:08:58There we go.
00:08:59Oh, that feels good, right?
00:09:00There we go.
00:09:01Yay, good girl.
00:09:06There it is.
00:09:07Oh, yes, now we can see it.
00:09:10Standing on the shoulders of children.
00:09:13Innocent eyes that gaze upon the world with wondrous excitement.
00:09:18You will probably never know me.
00:09:21You will probably not remember me.
00:09:24But someday, when you're older, your mother will show you a photograph and tell you my story.
00:09:31A story filled with self-abandon and regret.
00:09:35Regret that I will not be there for your report cards.
00:09:39For proms.
00:09:41For graduations.
00:09:43To give you both away at your weddings.
00:09:47I always wanted to be the one to teach you to drive.
00:09:51To navigate life with that same beautiful innocence that fills your youthful spirit today.
00:09:57To hope.
00:09:59To strive.
00:10:01To dream.
00:10:04But you're only three feet tall.
00:10:07And already bigger than me.
00:10:26Good morning.
00:10:27Time to get up.
00:10:29My water broke, Brian.
00:10:32Huh?
00:10:33What are you thinking?
00:10:34I just thought I was having a wet dream.
00:10:36Oh, funny.
00:10:38Come on, get up.
00:10:39Who?
00:10:40Hello?
00:10:41Oh, really?
00:10:42I can't reach you.
00:10:43Come on.
00:10:44I'll get out of bed.
00:10:45Feel this thing.
00:10:46It's coming out.
00:10:47Get up, please.
00:10:48Okay, all right.
00:10:49I'm just trying to keep you from panicking.
00:10:51All right.
00:10:54Yeah, take your time.
00:10:56Look, I can't go to the hospital naked.
00:10:58Why not?
00:10:59That would be awkward.
00:11:01Okay.
00:11:02All right.
00:11:03Speaking of, which hospital are we going to?
00:11:05You don't know which hospital we're going to?
00:11:07Yes, I know which hospital.
00:11:09Which hospital are we going to?
00:11:11I don't know.
00:11:12Let's go.
00:11:13I got it.
00:11:15Okay.
00:11:16Okay, okay.
00:11:17Calm down.
00:11:18Okay.
00:11:19Calm down.
00:11:20What are you doing?
00:11:23All right.
00:11:24Watch the hose.
00:11:26Something with more water than you.
00:11:28Oh, come on.
00:11:30Reese's, you stay right there.
00:11:32And...
00:11:33Okay.
00:11:36Let's get this.
00:11:38Okay.
00:11:39Oh.
00:11:40All right.
00:11:41Why is this thing?
00:11:42Oh, God.
00:11:43We're going to have to detail the car after this.
00:11:45Okay.
00:11:46What are you doing?
00:11:48Okay.
00:11:50You ready?
00:11:51Oh, baby, I'm ready.
00:11:52Um, are you ready?
00:11:54You seem a little frazzled.
00:11:55Yes, I'm frazzled, yes.
00:11:57Just breathe.
00:11:59Maybe, um, Cole should drive.
00:12:04Cole!
00:12:08Shh.
00:12:13Shh.
00:12:32Shh.
00:12:37It's okay. It's okay.
00:12:42I'm going to go for a walk.
00:13:08Hello?
00:13:10Are you busy?
00:13:12Brian, are you okay?
00:13:14I just needed to talk to someone.
00:13:17I'll wait up.
00:13:27Time.
00:13:29It moves so slowly when you have nothing to do but think.
00:13:32To remember the beginning.
00:13:35To dwell on the end.
00:13:38And to be haunted by everything in between.
00:13:41To be haunted by that word.
00:13:44That undefinable word.
00:13:47As undefinable as God.
00:13:50Yet a word I thought I knew intimately.
00:13:54Perfection.
00:13:56The perfect wife.
00:13:58The perfect husband.
00:14:00The perfect wife.
00:14:02The perfect children.
00:14:04The house. The dog. The job.
00:14:06The two-car garage. The diapers.
00:14:08The joint bank account.
00:14:11Piano recitals.
00:14:13Tap shoes.
00:14:15The American dream.
00:14:17An idea that became an ideal.
00:14:21It's Friday.
00:14:24Is it recycling or yard waste today?
00:14:29I don't know.
00:15:14Have you ever stood naked?
00:15:16Alone?
00:15:18And out of reach?
00:15:29No.
00:15:34The way Sarah cries, I can't help her.
00:15:39And the way Bella cries, she doesn't want me to help her.
00:15:44I just want...
00:15:47I know.
00:15:50Well, I don't.
00:15:53Once upon a time, maybe.
00:15:55But not anymore.
00:15:57You want too much.
00:16:00No, I don't.
00:16:01I just want...
00:16:03Your list is too long, and I'm too tired.
00:16:08I only want it to be perfect.
00:16:10Well, it's not.
00:16:11You never would have started fucking me.
00:16:13It's me.
00:16:23Do you have any idea what it's like to want something that you can't have?
00:16:31What do you want?
00:16:33I want you.
00:16:35And you want her.
00:16:38But you don't want her.
00:16:39You want the idea of her.
00:16:41And what you don't understand, Brian, is that you've idealized your life away.
00:16:47But I want you.
00:16:50I don't know what you want.
00:16:52But you don't want me.
00:16:54I'm just another part of the ideal, and I'm not perfect.
00:16:59But you're perfect to me.
00:17:03Don't want kids.
00:17:05I'm a cat person.
00:17:06I'm a cat person.
00:17:08I need time alone more than that.
00:17:10I need time with people.
00:17:13But I already know all of this.
00:17:16And I love you for you.
00:17:18How can you love me when she gives you everything?
00:17:23Everything I want, but nothing I need.
00:17:27This.
00:17:29Right here, right now.
00:17:30This is what I need.
00:17:37I need her to hold me like she used to.
00:17:42To hold me so close, like we're the same person.
00:17:46Like this.
00:17:48Like what we have.
00:17:58We have a dance and a photograph.
00:18:02We have a dance and a photograph.
00:18:12Kim was right.
00:18:14She had become the band-aid for a wound that would not heal.
00:18:18And no matter how much of her I stripped away,
00:18:22she would never fit into the mold Bella had created.
00:18:25I don't know if I'd be more alone with you,
00:18:29or without you.
00:18:31I don't know.
00:18:47She was right about a lot of things.
00:18:50One day you wake up and you realize
00:18:52that everything you ever wanted
00:18:54turned out to be nothing you ever wanted at all.
00:18:58And even the big things become as trivial as watermelon.
00:19:13Sarah finally fell asleep.
00:19:16I swear this colic is gonna kill me.
00:19:19Hmm.
00:19:26You smell like cigarettes.
00:19:28And watermelon.
00:19:31Hmm.
00:19:33Hmm.
00:19:55Morning, sunshine.
00:19:57Hey, beautiful.
00:19:58Hi.
00:20:00Hmm.
00:20:03Are you doing anything for lunch today?
00:20:06No.
00:20:07Did you want to do something?
00:20:09I was thinking about stopping by.
00:20:12I'd like that.
00:20:24Hmm.
00:20:26Hmm.
00:20:29Hmm.
00:20:33What time did you come in last night?
00:20:37What's that, honey?
00:20:38What time did you come in last night?
00:20:42I don't know. I didn't really look at the clock.
00:20:45I didn't even hear you come in.
00:20:47Really?
00:20:49Well, I gave you a kiss goodnight.
00:20:52You rolled over. I thought I woke you up.
00:20:55Nope.
00:20:58You know, one of these days I'm gonna get a call from Canada.
00:21:02You're gonna be missing a sock.
00:21:04You're gonna have a new tattoo of a heart and some sailor's name on your ass.
00:21:08And you're gonna say,
00:21:10I don't know where I was, but I woke up in a car that wasn't mine
00:21:14with some large man and a unitard offering me a sip of bourbon.
00:21:18Hmm.
00:21:21Here's your other sock, sailor.
00:21:35You're so sexy when you have your drafty face on.
00:21:38Hey, beautiful.
00:21:40Wanna go get some lunch or something?
00:21:42Yeah, I was thinking we could go down to the waterfront.
00:21:45But first I need to use the restroom.
00:21:47Yeah, just at the end of the hall to the left.
00:21:50Well, aren't you forgetting something?
00:21:52What would that be?
00:21:53Do I have to ask?
00:22:04Hi.
00:22:06Hi.
00:22:08You look good.
00:22:09Oh, thanks.
00:22:10How are you?
00:22:11I'm good. I just stopped by for lunch.
00:22:13I think we're gonna go to the waterfront.
00:22:15Did you want to come?
00:22:16I can't. Thanks though. I've already got plans.
00:22:19That's too bad. We don't hang out enough.
00:22:20I know. We should see each other more often.
00:22:23Oh, that's pretty. What is it?
00:22:25Thanks. I think it's called posh, but it tastes like watermelon.
00:22:32I like it.
00:22:34So how have you been?
00:22:36Good. You know, kids and stuff.
00:22:41Yeah, we've got some clients like that.
00:22:44Well, it's good to see you.
00:22:47I've got to get back to work.
00:22:48Yeah, good to see you too.
00:22:51Watermelon. Watermelon.
00:22:54Oh.
00:22:56Watermelon. Watermelon. Watermelon.
00:23:18You haven't touched your food.
00:23:20I haven't.
00:23:30I'm not as hungry as I thought I was.
00:23:41I think she has lipstick.
00:23:42Uh-huh.
00:23:43Yeah, she has.
00:23:44Uh-huh.
00:23:45Look, she does.
00:23:47She does have lipstick on.
00:23:48Oh, she does, doesn't she?
00:23:51Yeah.
00:23:58Bella? Bella? Are you okay?
00:24:00Yeah.
00:24:01Bella?
00:24:03If you want to talk.
00:24:04Mom, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. It's okay. I just...
00:24:09Right out here if you need anything.
00:24:10I'm fine.
00:24:19Mom?
00:24:34Oh, God.
00:24:39Shut up.
00:24:40God.
00:24:41God.
00:24:46Everything's going to be okay.
00:24:48Everything's going to be okay.
00:24:50Everything's going to be okay.
00:25:06Hey, little angels.
00:25:08How are you doing?
00:25:09What you doing?
00:25:10What you doing? Putting on a show?
00:25:13Hi.
00:25:15Is Mommy cooking?
00:25:17Something smells good.
00:25:20Cooking, baby.
00:25:26Something smells good.
00:25:33How was work?
00:25:35Well, my new client's a total prick, though, and that was good.
00:25:38It's nice to see you today for lunch. You still up for it?
00:25:41Yeah.
00:25:43I'll let you go.
00:25:45Come on.
00:26:08She knew.
00:26:11Nothing more need be said. She knew.
00:26:15And the thought came to her as quickly as a bullet.
00:26:19A bullet expelled from a gun that I had cleaned,
00:26:22oiled,
00:26:23aimed,
00:26:24and fired.
00:26:28Dearest Bella,
00:26:30I miss you.
00:26:37I miss you too.
00:27:08Oh, my God.
00:27:09Bella.
00:27:10Bella.
00:27:11Bella, what the fuck?
00:27:13Oh, my God.
00:27:14Bella.
00:27:16Jesus Christ.
00:27:18Oh, fuck.
00:27:22Oh, my God.
00:27:23Oh, my God.
00:27:25Oh, my God.
00:27:26Oh, my God.
00:27:27Oh, God.
00:27:28Oh, God.
00:27:29My wife just cut her wrist.
00:27:31I need an ambulance to 612 Forest Street.
00:27:34Sir, I need you to calm down. Can you do that for me?
00:27:37Yeah.
00:27:38The ambulance is on its way.
00:27:40I need you to know, sir, she's still breathing.
00:27:45Yeah.
00:27:48I need you to stop the bleeding.
00:27:50What did you do to her?
00:27:51Oh, my God.
00:27:52Brian.
00:27:53Brian, I need you to apply pressure above the laceration
00:27:56and lift her up above the level of her heart.
00:27:58Can you do that for me?
00:28:00Yeah, but don't do that.
00:28:01Yeah, but do I have to put the phone down?
00:28:03That's okay, Brian. Put the phone down.
00:28:05Oh, God.
00:28:06Don't hang up.
00:28:07Oh, God.
00:28:08Don't hang up.
00:28:09Oh, God.
00:28:10Oh, God.
00:28:11Oh.
00:28:12Oh.
00:28:13Oh.
00:28:26Oh, my God.
00:28:27Oh, my God.
00:28:31Oh, my God.
00:28:57Oh, my God.
00:28:58Oh, my God.
00:28:59Oh, my God.
00:29:16Thank you for calling Jennings Architecture.
00:29:19It is currently after hours, but if you have an emergency,
00:29:22at 555-4868, or stay on the line and leave a message.
00:29:28Hey John, it's Brian. I'm having a family emergency, so I'm just calling to let you
00:29:39know that I won't be to work for a couple days, so I'll probably see you next Monday.
00:29:52I'll talk to you later.
00:30:17Bella died for 48 seconds.
00:30:21I have been dying ever since.
00:30:24As her heart slowed and stopped, I realized at that very moment something I should have always known.
00:30:32She loved me more than she loved herself.
00:30:51She loved me more than she loved herself.
00:31:15I remember when I met your mother.
00:31:37She was beautiful.
00:31:41It's not that she's not beautiful, she's gorgeous.
00:31:46It's just, I'm used to her.
00:31:52I don't even know why I did it. It was stupid.
00:31:59It's not commitment that I have a problem with.
00:32:03It's contentment.
00:32:09It's like no matter how good I have it, it's never good enough.
00:32:15It's no one's fault.
00:32:24I just fucked up.
00:32:49Harborview Medical Center.
00:32:51Yeah, this is Brian Sanders.
00:32:53I'm calling to see how my wife's doing.
00:32:55What is her name, please?
00:32:57Bella Sanders.
00:33:13Your wife is in stable condition.
00:33:15She should be released sometime this evening or tomorrow morning.
00:33:20Okay, thank you.
00:33:50She's sleeping, Brian.
00:33:52Okay, thank you.
00:34:14She doesn't want to talk yet, Brian.
00:34:17I just want to make sure she's okay.
00:34:19I think it's going to be a long time before she's okay.
00:34:48Hello?
00:34:50Hi, Gary. Is Bella there?
00:34:52We'll call you when she's ready.
00:35:16Hello?
00:35:28Brian, she's just not ready yet.
00:35:31Can I please see the girls?
00:35:33Hold on.
00:35:39What time do you get off tomorrow?
00:35:41Whenever you want.
00:35:44I'll see you at Owen's Beach around one.
00:35:49Thank you so much.
00:35:50I'll see you tomorrow.
00:35:55I'm going to see you all tomorrow.
00:35:58All right.
00:36:10Hi.
00:36:13Oh.
00:36:15There you go.
00:36:16Hey.
00:36:24There you go. There's Teddy.
00:36:25There she is. Hi.
00:36:27Oh, look who's here to see you.
00:36:28Oh, I know.
00:36:30Here, come on.
00:36:32Here, he's excited.
00:36:34Okay.
00:36:35Get this off.
00:36:38You're like a magician.
00:36:39Okay, you ready?
00:36:40I'll trade you.
00:36:41Okay.
00:36:44There she is.
00:36:48Come on.
00:36:49Come on.
00:36:53Hold on here.
00:36:57It's good to see you guys.
00:36:59Yeah.
00:37:03How have you been, huh?
00:37:07How has she been?
00:37:08Oh.
00:37:10Oh, he's doing interesting things.
00:37:12Oh, yeah.
00:37:14Character.
00:37:15Come on.
00:37:23Oh.
00:37:27Ready?
00:37:39There she is.
00:37:40Come on.
00:37:41Let's get out and see the day, huh?
00:37:44There you go.
00:37:45Hi.
00:37:48There you are, gorgeous.
00:37:54Oh.
00:38:02Thank you so much for bringing the family.
00:38:04It's just the right thing to do.
00:38:08So how are you doing?
00:38:10I just want to know if she's okay.
00:38:13She's really hurt, Brian, and I don't think she's going to forgive you.
00:38:17I can't even forgive myself.
00:38:20You love her and she loves you.
00:38:21You just made a mistake.
00:38:23She doesn't understand that you understand what you've done.
00:38:27She only knows she's hurting because of you.
00:38:34This is either going to drive you farther apart or bring you closer together, but it's not your choice.
00:38:42It's her choice now.
00:38:44I know.
00:38:46You just have to give her time to decide.
00:38:49It's just hard not being able to see her or talk to her.
00:39:03Thanks for coming out today.
00:39:07It's the right thing to do.
00:39:29My mother has a gift of Catholic guilt and my dad's going to kick your ass if you keep calling.
00:39:34So how are you doing?
00:39:37If I see a therapist three times a week, the state won't take the kids.
00:39:40How are you?
00:39:42Well, it's over.
00:39:43I told her we're done.
00:39:45It's too late for that.
00:39:47I know I messed up and I can't go back.
00:39:52But I'm sorry.
00:39:54I'm so sorry.
00:39:56How could you do this to me?
00:39:59How?
00:40:00When I love you so much.
00:40:03I don't know.
00:40:05I love you so much, Brian.
00:40:15I love you.
00:40:24I want a divorce.
00:40:26Ella.
00:40:27I don't want to talk about it.
00:40:29I want a divorce and I want the kids and the house and car.
00:40:36And you can give me the dog, okay?
00:40:40Take whatever you want.
00:40:43Could you be out by Friday?
00:40:45If we don't come home soon, Cole's going to know something's wrong.
00:40:48Well, what are you going to tell her when you come home and I'm not here?
00:40:52I'm going to tell her the truth.
00:40:56Okay.
00:40:57She should know.
00:41:04I have to go.
00:41:07Take care of yourself, Brian.
00:41:09Yeah.
00:41:11I love you.
00:41:19Okay.
00:41:21I guess this is it for a while.
00:41:52Bye.
00:42:14Hello.
00:42:15Hi.
00:42:16Where's Kim?
00:42:17I've only been here for a week.
00:42:18I don't think I've met her yet.
00:42:20Thanks.
00:42:21Oh, Mr. Jennings, why don't you just stop by his office and we'll cut it.
00:42:24All right.
00:42:30I've known you for a long time and I've never seen you like this.
00:42:36I'm sorry, John.
00:42:37I'm just having problems at home.
00:42:39You've missed 43 days in the past three months.
00:42:44And when you do show up, you smell like alcohol.
00:42:49My wife and I are...
00:42:52I don't even know what we are.
00:42:53Which is why it hurts me to do this, but you're really not leaving me any choice.
00:42:59I understand.
00:43:02I wish you the best.
00:43:03I really do.
00:43:06Thanks.
00:43:20What I didn't give away, I threw away.
00:43:26I threw it all away.
00:43:29As easily as one throws away the wrapping on a birthday present.
00:43:33I've always been too selfish to understand that it's the wrapping that makes it special.
00:43:39You're fired, he said, in so many words.
00:43:43You're fired from life.
00:43:47For you have failed everyone who has ever loved you.
00:43:51You have failed yourself.
00:43:54And no amount of sorry will make this better.
00:43:57No amount of forgiveness will make me worthy.
00:44:01I deserve the hurt I have caused.
00:44:04And in the end, the last thing I want is to feel better.
00:44:17I'm sorry.
00:44:37Security.
00:44:47Excuse me, sir.
00:44:50We've had a few noise complaints.
00:44:52I had you top it off.
00:44:53Your credit card has been declined.
00:44:56So we need to get your stuff out right now.
00:44:59Do you have a jacket you want to bring?
00:45:01Is this your jacket?
00:45:04Is this the one?
00:45:05Yeah?
00:45:06Here, why don't you put that on?
00:45:08All right, we've got to grab your stuff.
00:45:10What do you want to bring with you?
00:45:14Oh.
00:45:18There.
00:45:20Hold on to that.
00:45:22Hold on.
00:45:24Just...
00:45:26I don't know.
00:45:27Is that all you need?
00:45:28All right, we're going to go.
00:45:43I'm sorry.
00:45:45I'm sorry.
00:45:47I'm sorry.
00:45:49I'm sorry.
00:45:51I'm sorry.
00:45:53I'm sorry.
00:45:55I'm sorry.
00:45:57I'm sorry.
00:45:59I'm sorry.
00:46:01I'm sorry.
00:46:03I'm sorry.
00:46:05I'm sorry.
00:46:07I'm sorry.
00:46:09I'm sorry.
00:46:11I'm sorry.
00:46:13I'm sorry.
00:46:15I'm sorry.
00:46:17I'm sorry.
00:46:19I'm sorry.
00:46:21I'm sorry.
00:46:23I'm sorry.
00:46:25I'm sorry.
00:46:27I'm sorry.
00:46:29I'm sorry.
00:46:31I'm sorry.
00:46:33I'm sorry.
00:46:35I'm sorry.
00:46:37I'm sorry.
00:46:39I'm sorry.
00:46:41I'm sorry.
00:46:43I'm sorry.
00:46:45I'm sorry.
00:46:52Party just moved to a new venue, that's all.
00:46:56I don't worry.
00:46:58You know what?
00:47:11I love you, Reese.
00:47:12You know what else?
00:47:15You're too good for this.
00:47:16You want to go home?
00:47:20Come on.
00:47:23Off like a herd of turtles.
00:47:25Come on.
00:47:35Can't believe I let you talk me into this.
00:47:38Well, I know you've heard this story a million times, but if I don't keep talking, I can't
00:47:51keep walking.
00:47:53So, a million and one, what do you have to say about that, huh?
00:48:00Huh?
00:48:03That's what I thought.
00:48:07Anyway, we drove all day to get to where you were born.
00:48:11Have you ever seen your mother drive, huh?
00:48:16She's beautiful, but she's so serious.
00:48:23I always felt like I was on a mission to make her laugh.
00:48:28I like that feeling of trying to impress somebody.
00:48:32She made me feel that way all the time, and when she smiled, I swear there was heaven
00:48:41on her lips, but don't get any ideas.
00:48:47You're too young to start dating there, mister.
00:48:50You're too young for that.
00:48:53Anyway, we get to the farm way out in the boonies, and I swear the place was odd.
00:49:04It was like a circus.
00:49:08There was kids on unicycles, goats with eight horns.
00:49:16I think there was even a cat with wings.
00:49:20Woo-hoo-hoo!
00:49:23Bet you liked to play with that, chase that around the yard all day, huh?
00:49:30Oh, and your mother, she had the best sense of style.
00:49:37She wore dresses from the 50s and little things in her hair.
00:49:49She reminded me of Marilyn Monroe before, well, she was Marilyn Monroe.
00:49:56I think it was the way the wind whipped up her dress.
00:50:05It didn't matter where we went or what we did, I couldn't take my eyes off her.
00:50:19She glowed even when she slept.
00:50:23Have you ever seen The Lion King?
00:50:26Yeah, I have about 75 times.
00:50:30I have kids.
00:50:33Remember?
00:50:35Remember when James Earl Jones is holding up Simba?
00:50:43Well, that's how it was when I met you.
00:50:50Only, you weren't Simba.
00:50:56You...
00:51:00You were like a peanut butter cup.
00:51:07A fat, chunky, little peanut butter cup.
00:51:17That's how you got your name.
00:51:21Let's just do this tomorrow, buddy, okay?
00:51:24One more.
00:51:27One more.
00:51:30One more.
00:51:33One more.
00:51:36One more.
00:51:39One more.
00:51:42One more.
00:51:45One more.
00:51:48One more.
00:51:50One more.
00:52:20One more.
00:52:23One more.
00:52:26One more.
00:52:29One more.
00:52:32One more.
00:52:35One more.
00:52:38One more.
00:52:41One more.
00:52:44One more.
00:52:47One more.
00:52:50One more.
00:52:53One more.
00:52:56One more.
00:52:59One more.
00:53:02One more.
00:53:05One more.
00:53:08One more.
00:53:11One more.
00:53:14One more.
00:53:17Oh
00:53:47Oh
00:54:17Oh
00:54:47Oh
00:55:17Oh
00:55:43Look at kids
00:55:46Hey fuck off. Hey, hey, what's your problem?
00:55:54You walk through here every day, where do you go? I don't know. I guess I'm not going in
00:55:59Quit being a pathetic fuck and say hi every once in a while, huh?
00:56:04Well, you're gonna sit down and ain't fucking church
00:56:08A piece of shit Paul, I'm Terry. It's my friend vodka. Who the fuck are you?
00:56:15Brian
00:56:18Hey, hey waitress, can I get a napkin for my friend here a
00:56:24Child watching your stagnant con
00:56:29I gotta go
00:56:31Where the fuck are you gonna go?
00:56:33You've got a job interview or something. Oh
00:56:36Gonna be a big-shot dental assistant
00:56:39Yeah, fuck you. Yeah drunk
00:56:44You
00:57:14You
00:57:44You
00:57:53The taste of used food subsides as the flickering streetlights create a rhythmic dance of muted shadows I
00:58:01Stuff my coat with newspapers. I will never read
00:58:05The first night was cold
00:58:09So is the second and every night the father
00:58:14Memories will never keep you warm at night
00:58:18But they will keep you out
00:58:21Even the good ones
00:58:24Have you ever held someone so close that you forget which one
00:58:29But you think it's your fingers moving
00:58:45I think it's your lips
00:58:57Hey, so did you get that job?
00:59:02Jesus Christ watching you is like watching some pathetic fucking dog shit himself
00:59:07And then wipe his ass all over the ground is spirit in real good
00:59:10What you need is an aspirin and a shower
00:59:19Well, are you gonna sit out or what
00:59:25What is your deal anyway, you ain't supposed to be here
00:59:30Well, I used to have a wife kids a dog
00:59:35House Jesus Christ. You are a dental assistant
00:59:38Well, I was an architect an architect you were an architect you don't have any floors that were between you and the ground
00:59:49Let me tell you something you're piece of shit I used to be a dental hygienist
00:59:58Being a dental hygienist it's a lot like being a shrink
01:00:01Only most of my clients were numb kind of like you
01:00:04Only most of my clients were numb kind of like you
01:00:09Talk to me about being
01:00:12You have a smoke crack
01:00:16Smoking crack is kind of like waking up Frankenstein's monster. There's a big jolt of electricity
01:00:22And then he just stumbles around all sad and lonely
01:00:25so the town folk they all get together and you know get their pitchforks and
01:00:30How they run him out of town and kill him or fuck I forget
01:00:35killed it
01:00:37Killed it. Thank you very much
01:00:39Anyway, my point is this
01:00:41You walk around here like fucking Frankenstein's monster and I see I could tell you ain't supposed to be here. You're a fucking accident
01:00:50So I look for my pitchfork, but then I realized I'm not a fucking farmer. What do I need a pitchfork for?
01:00:57But by the time I realized that you're fucking gone
01:01:03Just do yourself a favor go be an architect
01:01:07Build yourself some big building that you don't want to jump off of
01:01:12Or at least be a good drunk
01:01:14You fucking piece of shit
01:01:22Thank you
01:01:27Yeah, go fuck yourself Frankie the park fly
01:01:36Jesus Paul, you're a fucking embarrassment
01:01:57You
01:02:24Do you mind if I sit and watch you paint
01:02:27Not at all
01:02:31This is always reminded me of something from a different life a couple of months ago it was wrapped in plastic
01:02:40Interesting how something so strong can also be so fragile
01:02:45So, are you in school third-quarter freshmen, well, it's very beautiful. Thank you
01:02:50Do you paint I always wanted to I was told my wife I'd enter but I never
01:02:59You're married
01:03:01No, I'm divorced. I'm sorry. It's okay. It's been a while
01:03:10Going on three years
01:03:12Too bad
01:03:15It's all right, where are you from?
01:03:19And let's have tourists written all over me
01:03:22Well that depends if you ask me to take your picture for the space
01:03:28I'm from Portland. Really? Yeah, I'm sailing Oh right on
01:03:35Well, I should probably let you get back to your work that's okay you don't have to
01:03:42Thanks, but I need to start looking for some dinner
01:03:45But good luck to you
01:04:12You
01:04:42You
01:05:02Hi, hi, how are you just trying to get money the other person food? Do you have any spare change?
01:05:10I'm sorry. It's okay. Thanks anyway. Have a good night
01:05:32So I don't get the homeless money, but I will help you help yourself
01:05:39I want to see you can paint pictures and that way you don't have to bed. Thank you
01:05:49Well, you're one of the nicest people I've ever met I
01:05:53Hope you get everything you ever want from life
01:05:57That you know what you have when you have
01:06:01Thank you, thank you
01:06:10Hey, hey, I'm gonna break you the architect
01:06:26You're gonna come over and join me or what
01:06:39Are you so happy about life goes on
01:06:46It doesn't matter how much you push it pull it remember or forget it's indifferent it just goes on
01:06:55And I think back to the little things the things that matter most
01:07:00the laughter
01:07:03The wet laughter that hurts in the best way
01:07:06Her lip-lock eyes across a crowded room
01:07:12Philosophy over coffee
01:07:16Explaining why the sky is blue to a child who thinks the world of you
01:07:21So wide-eyed and full of possibilities
01:07:24endless possibilities
01:07:28When the world was made of magic
01:07:32Of course unicorns are real
01:07:36As real as princesses as real as Bigfoot as real as you and me
01:07:44Once when I was your age, I rode one I rode one but the horn is very sharp
01:07:52That's how I got these scars on my chin, you know
01:08:00Fly
01:08:03Fly
01:08:06Fly as I sink
01:08:36I
01:09:06Take a walk with me
01:09:15Let's go find
01:09:19I want to see the stars again
01:09:23With the wonder that I had at the age of 10
01:09:29So now I'm alone
01:09:33Once again
01:09:36I'm on my own
01:09:38She lost the magic she had for me
01:09:43in
01:09:45her eyes
01:09:47We no longer
01:09:50Share the same skies
01:09:53No
01:09:55We don't
01:09:57Not at all
01:10:01Not at all
01:10:07So now I walk alone
01:10:12Once again
01:10:18She lost the magic she had for me
01:10:25Lost the magic
01:10:28Complete
01:10:31In each one of us Peter Pan
01:10:36Elvis Presley
01:10:39Superman
01:10:41In each one of us Jacques Cousteau
01:10:46To marvel at the earth
01:10:49And the sea below
01:11:02In each one of us
01:11:05Peter Pan
01:11:08Elvis Presley
01:11:11Superman
01:11:14In each one of us Jacques Cousteau
01:11:19To marvel at the earth
01:11:22And the sea below
01:11:34Take a walk with me
01:11:51Let's go find believe
01:11:58Believe
01:12:01Believe
01:12:05I want to see the stars again
01:12:15The stars
01:12:19With the wonder that I had at the age of 10
01:12:32The age of 10
01:12:34Lying in your chest and talking for hours
01:12:39The age of 10
01:12:44We remembered
01:12:46I just had a shower
01:13:03So I walk alone
01:13:09Once again
01:13:13I'm on my own
01:13:16She lost the magic
01:13:20She had for me
01:13:25When her eyes
01:13:30We no longer
01:13:34Share the sky
01:13:38No
01:13:42No
01:13:46No
01:13:50Not at all
01:13:54Sometimes I can't help but wonder maybe we forget each other every time you look away
01:14:05I see you
01:14:13In each one of us
01:14:16Peter Pan
01:14:20Elvis Presley
01:14:24Superman
01:14:27In each one of us
01:14:31Jacques Cousteau
01:14:34To marvel at the earth
01:14:37And the sea below
01:14:41I just need someone
01:14:44Who understands
01:14:48The little boy
01:14:52Inside the man
01:14:55Just need someone
01:14:59Understand
01:15:02Part of me lives
01:15:06In a dreamland
01:15:13I
01:15:26Remember she thought
01:15:30But I can't forget
01:15:33Once you asked me if I had ever stood naked in front of anyone
01:15:37alone and out of reach I
01:15:40Took off my clothes and backed away from you
01:15:44Simply asked me my middle name and told me to put my clothes back on
01:15:50I am standing naked and raw for you now Bella
01:15:55Not to beg forgiveness
01:15:57But to beg that you find happiness
01:16:00The kind of happiness I can never give you
01:16:05And if you should see the unrecognizable me on the street
01:16:09Don't look down
01:16:11Don't look back
01:16:14And I will grant you the same respect
01:16:20Ain't you guys got a home to go to yeah
01:16:24I was thinking about maybe getting a wife
01:16:26Shitting out some kids
01:16:28Being an architect
01:16:30Do you marry me?
01:16:32Shut up, you're fucking drunk
01:16:36Do you ever leave the bench
01:16:39What do they decorate you guys at Christmas time
01:16:45Yes, no
01:16:49Okay, well I'm gonna go get a cup of coffee join
01:16:59Come on sweetheart Danny wants some breakfast
01:17:04Loopy
01:17:08I
01:17:38Don't
01:18:08Oh
01:18:14There was one thing you could change about your life, what would it be one thing is all I get
01:18:23One is all I get I don't play this
01:18:26Pussy I
01:18:29Want to be president United States, that's right that way I can declare a state anarchy I
01:18:35I
01:18:37Want to be a movie star a
01:18:40big fucking movie star
01:18:43Live in a big fucking house
01:18:45Make big fucking movies. I
01:18:50Want to be the love child to sit vicious and Molly Ringwald I
01:18:58Want to sit up all night in an all-night diner and order nothing
01:19:04I want to be God the sole purpose of saying I brought you into this world. Don't think for one minute
01:19:10I won't take you out. I
01:19:13Want the original promise I
01:19:16Want justice for all I
01:19:20Want love hate ups and downs and everything in between
01:19:26For nothing in return I
01:19:31Want the world in my palm
01:19:33No cooler than 60 degrees
01:19:36No warmer than 75
01:19:39And never a cloud in the sky
01:19:44I want the perfect kiss the perfect imperfection
01:19:50The perfect life
01:19:54But more than anything I want someone who wants what I want
01:19:59And I wanted to walk through that door right over there
01:20:03And order biscuits and grain
01:20:07You're a pathetic fuck
01:20:13Not you him
01:20:16Jesus that was beautiful
01:20:33You
01:21:03You
01:21:33You
01:22:03You
01:22:14You left perfect
01:22:23Why is it worth it
01:22:25Yes
01:22:32What is left of you
01:22:42From this rendezvous
01:22:45Oh
01:22:55Contentment fades away
01:23:03Into the gray
01:23:09Ghost of you
01:23:11Oh
01:23:18Where's it going to
01:23:27And the way you were
01:23:32Lives in shadows now and becomes a blur
01:23:42And nothing can touch the moment
01:23:46It's all yours now you own it
01:23:52Nothing no not even reason can touch the season that you're in
01:23:59That you're in
01:24:04You lean to kiss it
01:24:07Well
01:24:09It fades away
01:24:13But then you're missing
01:24:19You're so close but through the years
01:24:24in circles again
01:24:26with burdens and fears
01:24:29Now you are swimming in tears of sorrow
01:24:37Oh
01:24:45Contentment fades away
01:24:54Into the gray
01:24:58And goes to you
01:25:01You
01:25:03Well, it hides away
01:25:08Where's it going to
01:25:18Where you
01:25:22Lives in shadows now
01:25:27Becomes the blur
01:25:32And nothing can touch the moment
01:25:37It's all yours now
01:25:39You own it
01:25:42Nothing no not even reason can touch the season that you're in
01:25:52Nothing can touch the moment
01:25:56It's all yours now you own it
01:26:01Nothing not even reason can touch the season that you're in
01:26:13That you're in
01:26:18That you're in
01:26:23That you're in
01:26:28That you're in
01:26:31That you're in