My friend who listens to your show often recommended me to talk to you. I've seen videos and read your book. I am stuck on the treadmill of life. My wife got pregnant while we were 18 with my son. We got married and life has been hard ever since.
Early 30s, 5 ft 10, dark hair/eyes, fit lean build, young looking
TL;DR
I feel like a pathetic loser and single father. I know I'll be bitter forever but can't bring myself to finally leave her. None of my family/friends know other than 1 friend. Talked to lawyers. All of her friends/family/client's know. I see them and am ashamed. I have the lowest self respect ever. She has been berating me
years. She won't let me lead in any aspect. I have no frame. Why am I like this? Do I think I had my shot so now I need to take care of my sons? I don't want to see my kid's half as often? Is it because I've never been with another girl? Do I worry about her finding a new man or I won't find a new girl? How can I look my sons in the eye and tell them I wasn't strong enough to do what I recommend for them? She says she loves me. I love her, but this seems really unhealthy. Where is my masculine desire to leave? Am I the problem? Is she? Does she have BPD?
Backstory timeline:
High school, sophomore year. Ask her to be my gf immediately after she broke up with her boyfriend, she ended it the next day. It was because she was fooling around with her ex.
Time goes by, we start dating.
Our relationship is constant drama and roller coaster of emotions. We were both jealous of any interaction with the opposite sex.
She got pregnant Junior year but she miscarried. We still dated and she gets pregnant my first semester in college when I was thinking of breaking up with her.
We got married, lived with family for the first while with my son and then got an apartment. I had been bouncing around between part time jobs while going to school and she started her own company doing aesthetics. Mainly eyelashes.
I did poor in school. Hadn't grown up and wasn't being a man.
She goes to Aesthetic school and we both work evenings.
The cycle repeats of me getting a new job every year only to increase pay slightly and inching towards my degree. She continued with Aesthetics.
Have another son.
She had been inappropriately chatting with a friend of ours. She moves out and tells me we need some time apart and strings me along.
We start going to counseling. I think this can work. She starts seeing change in me. I asked her about any cheating which she lied about and I believed.
She tells me about cheating on me.
I'm furious but still attend counseling.
I'm done. Planning for divorce mentally. Checked out from the relationship.
Early 30s, 5 ft 10, dark hair/eyes, fit lean build, young looking
TL;DR
I feel like a pathetic loser and single father. I know I'll be bitter forever but can't bring myself to finally leave her. None of my family/friends know other than 1 friend. Talked to lawyers. All of her friends/family/client's know. I see them and am ashamed. I have the lowest self respect ever. She has been berating me
years. She won't let me lead in any aspect. I have no frame. Why am I like this? Do I think I had my shot so now I need to take care of my sons? I don't want to see my kid's half as often? Is it because I've never been with another girl? Do I worry about her finding a new man or I won't find a new girl? How can I look my sons in the eye and tell them I wasn't strong enough to do what I recommend for them? She says she loves me. I love her, but this seems really unhealthy. Where is my masculine desire to leave? Am I the problem? Is she? Does she have BPD?
Backstory timeline:
High school, sophomore year. Ask her to be my gf immediately after she broke up with her boyfriend, she ended it the next day. It was because she was fooling around with her ex.
Time goes by, we start dating.
Our relationship is constant drama and roller coaster of emotions. We were both jealous of any interaction with the opposite sex.
She got pregnant Junior year but she miscarried. We still dated and she gets pregnant my first semester in college when I was thinking of breaking up with her.
We got married, lived with family for the first while with my son and then got an apartment. I had been bouncing around between part time jobs while going to school and she started her own company doing aesthetics. Mainly eyelashes.
I did poor in school. Hadn't grown up and wasn't being a man.
She goes to Aesthetic school and we both work evenings.
The cycle repeats of me getting a new job every year only to increase pay slightly and inching towards my degree. She continued with Aesthetics.
Have another son.
She had been inappropriately chatting with a friend of ours. She moves out and tells me we need some time apart and strings me along.
We start going to counseling. I think this can work. She starts seeing change in me. I asked her about any cheating which she lied about and I believed.
She tells me about cheating on me.
I'm furious but still attend counseling.
I'm done. Planning for divorce mentally. Checked out from the relationship.
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Learning