Dave & Chuck the Freak ask listeners to share stories about what they destroyed in someone else's house and it all started with an e-mail about a bidet gone wrong.
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00:00the question on the riff lines right now is what did you destroy in someone else's house
00:12we bring it up after this email he says i can't believe i'm telling you guys this but i had the
00:18most horrible thing happened to me the other night i was at a buddy's place for dinner he just got
00:22married and they invited me over for dinner and to check out their new place really nice place in
00:26bloomfield anyway i've got to go to the bathroom they're renovating the one downstairs so they told
00:31me to use the one in their bedroom i get in there and they have one of those fancy electronic bidet
00:37type toilets you guys have talked about before so standing taking a piss and i'm looking at this
00:42giant panel on the wall beside it to see what this thing does and i accidentally hit a button oh boy
00:49i hear this noise and all of a sudden a wand comes out and starts shooting toilet water all over my
00:55face oh my god i start gagging i try to hit the button to turn it off and after pounding every
01:02button for what seemed like forever the thing finally shuts off i'm soaking wet my clothes are
01:08wet my hair is wet their bathroom looks like it's been flooded there's water all over the wall behind
01:14me i had no idea what to do i finally had to open the door and yell downstairs for my buddy to come up
01:19and give me a hand what would your move have been if all of a sudden your toilet was squirting you
01:25what's your move oh my god i don't know yeah i i know what i would do what would you do chuck
01:30i try and put my hand over it oh that's a good idea put the lid down oh that's another that's
01:37another another fantastic idea at least put the lid down but i never think of a lid
01:42they come nicely with the toy nice fancy toilet yeah i would just pretty easy i would just grab that
01:49wand you know like grabbed it just hold it on to the butt wand you know i could wash my hands
01:56yeah i think it was still squirt out around it would be bad it wouldn't be good you call and
02:00then you yell for the owners to hey yeah and then they can exactly i got your butt wand
02:05christ screaming water's going everywhere help help i would be uh so what about you
02:17what did you destroy in someone else's house and what was the reaction did you hide it did they know
02:23uh art is calling us from the west side he's up first here on the riff lines hi art how are you
02:28what's going on dave what's up chuck what's happening y'all what's up man what's going on
02:34actually you know actually i didn't destroy it i was at my brother's and you know you when you when
02:39you go over they house and you got to use the bathroom and i actually had to take a dump and i
02:44needed the plunger so i had to go and get the plunger and that was kind of embarrassing you know
02:51yeah hey you the boot day doesn't have a lid that's what uh that's what there was a few
02:59texts that i saw it's uh no it's a fancy toilet it's not an actual day no the boot it's a boot day
03:07ain't it a boot day well some people call it a bidet it's close i love boot day though yeah i'm calling
03:15a boot day from now on yeah you got a fancy boot day i'm gonna use the boot day
03:19take it easy art wants to use a boot day hey girl you got a boot day she got a boot day
03:30oh that's great no the old school ones the days don't have the lids but this is like one of those
03:46new fancy panties yeah yeah no but there are there i think there are people saying though that some of
03:51these new ones that that you can get they don't come with a lid because there's too much going on
03:57electronics yeah so i don't know a boot day a boot day is funny that should be a brand name for it
04:04get your booty on the boot day um this one god i could see me in a situation like this i was with
04:12my buddy who was picking up some weed from his dealer okay it was my first time going in so they
04:19go into the back i stay in the living room i was standing there just looking around when i got the
04:24sniffles and sneezed and blew all the cocaine off his coffee table
04:31oh shoot oh jesus
04:40don't have dave around if you're having a cocaine party
04:44come on sneezy sam let's get let's get out of here that was a 25 000 sneeze
04:55could you imagine well number one they're like did you do all our coke yeah they just think you did it
05:04yeah i sneezed it off man no no no just a big sneeze big sneeze i don't think so and then you're dead
05:13you're dead
05:15you're dead
05:36you