Dave & Chuck the Freak ask listeners to call-in and share stories about their greatest sexual achievements.
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00:00all right here's a question for you on Dave and Chuck the Freak this morning what would you say
00:11has been your greatest sexual achievement your greatest sexual achievement ever even having
00:20that's what I was just gonna say just having some sex if you have something you think qualifies as
00:26a greatest sexual achievement 1-855-954-6969 is the toll-free number to reach us 1-855-954-6969
00:36or you can text us at 4-6969 and the email as always is email at daveandchuckthefreak.com
00:44let's go to uh rick who's on a regular line with us hi rick good morning to you
00:49hey electrified penis falls and right back at you yes i uh i played college hockey at bethel
00:58university in minneapolis don't know if i'm allowed to say that name or not but uh they're christ
01:03christian college and uh i befriended two inseparable really smoking hot girls and uh
01:12they said the only way that this was going to happen was if it was a three-way so three-way
01:17wednesdays became a thing for me the life of a hockey player three-way wednesdays yeah
01:23my wednesday today is just scraping enough together to get a fleshlight
01:27one-way wednesdays for 30 odd years
01:32one-way wednesday it's a one-way wednesday what a streak
01:37yep yeah um okay a couple of texts here i knew i'd hate this
01:44this guy said his greatest sexual achievement he licked the tip
01:48his own
01:50very flexible man yeah or
01:59very well endowed right
02:01hung like a horse yes
02:04champions with hung like a horse
02:07real thrill bread uh this guy i'm three feet away from life
02:12this guy said i got a bj during a work skype while on camera from the chest up
02:17i think there's a lot of that going on these days
02:20yeah i think the perverted people
02:22who can have some sex action
02:24the numbers the numbers here are not adding up we need to focus on quarter
02:30why are your eyes crossed
02:33because i'm thinking too much about work
02:37ah the old skype beager
02:41the old skype
02:43the old skype beager
02:442020
02:45would you care for a lesbian tale this morning
02:48yes
02:49sure
02:49here's a lesbian's greatest sexual achievement
02:52good morning anonymous how are you
02:54hello good how are you
02:55we're doing okay so what was it for you
02:57all right so um
02:59one of two things here um
03:01one would have to be
03:03uh two straight women
03:05um claiming that they
03:07could go the rest of their lives without having sex with a man ever again
03:10um
03:11as i identify as a gay woman
03:14and so the other one would have to be
03:16making um
03:17women on multiple occasions cry
03:19after having an orgasm
03:21like really really good tears
03:22can i ask a question
03:25oh my god
03:26uh yes
03:27when you say you made these ladies
03:29cry
03:31when you brought them to tears
03:32was it using your oral
03:34or digital skills
03:36oh
03:37well
03:38combination
03:39combo
03:39yeah
03:40combo
03:40both at the same time
03:42separately
03:43yeah
03:43uh
03:45at the same time
03:46at the same time
03:47just making sure
03:49and they had never experienced said tears
03:51said pleasure tears
03:53before then
03:53no
03:55no
03:55do you believe you've got some sort of magic lesbo tongue
03:58or what's what's the deal here
04:00i don't know man
04:01you just gotta listen to a woman's body
04:03that's that's all it is
04:04it's science
04:04just
04:05you know
04:05it's true
04:06do some research
04:06yeah
04:07yep
04:07listen to them
04:08skills
04:08don't be too cocky going in
04:11take some tips
04:12that's
04:14all right anonymous
04:16thanks for calling in
04:17wonderful advice to a lesbian
04:17yeah thanks guys
04:18don't be too cocky going in
04:20don't be too cocky
04:23don't be too cocky
04:25anywho
04:32hmm
04:33fine tale
04:34uh we're talking about your greatest sexual achievements
04:37and uh andy's up next with us here
04:39good morning andy
04:40hey good morning ripcord
04:42ripcord
04:43what's your story dude
04:44uh
04:45you know i was at a bar one time
04:47met some rando chick
04:49hitting it off
04:50made out a little bit
04:50i go to the bathroom to go pee
04:52i feel like warm
04:54as i'm peeing
04:55i never took myself out of my pants
04:57completely peed my pants
04:58so now i'm like
04:59well what the hell do i do
05:00how do you do that
05:01so i go to the bar
05:02it was terrible
05:03i sit down at the bar
05:05i actually tied my uh
05:06sweater around my waist
05:07kind of hide it
05:08the girl's like
05:08why'd you take your sweater off
05:09instead of lying
05:11like i normally would
05:11i'm like you know what
05:12i'm gonna be honest
05:13i told her
05:13hey i peed my pants
05:14she's like no you didn't
05:15so i show her
05:16she's like uh
05:17did you drive here
05:18i'm like yep
05:19she's like follow me
05:19went back to her place
05:21she took off my clothes
05:22put them in the shower
05:23or put them in the washer
05:24her and i took a shower
05:26had sex that night
05:27i woke up
05:28got my clean clothes
05:28bolted out like michael
05:30that is pretty impressive
05:31that you pissed yourself
05:32you wet your pants
05:34at the bar
05:34and still managed
05:35to take a lady home
05:36some guys got all the luck
05:37i guess they do
05:38because that should shut
05:40everything down
05:41she's a special girl guys
05:42i guess
05:43she even did his laundry
05:44she's like come on back
05:45yeah
05:46what's a little urine
05:48but then i'll throw that
05:49in the washer
05:49change your life
05:51good is new
05:51then he took off
05:53the next morning
05:54they all do lease
05:56they all lease
05:58thanks for the fresh pants
05:59i get them while
06:01the getting's good
06:01i'm always down a tide pod
06:04and that never should happen
06:10you you piss your pants
06:11at a bar
06:12that's a crazy
06:13different movie
06:13he's like hmm
06:14i won't say that i
06:15spilled a drink
06:16i pissed myself
06:19i'm gonna be
06:21one thousand percent
06:22honest
06:23this is all my urine
06:24i'm covered in my own pee
06:26you