Plead The Fifth: Davy FINALLY Answers Why He Hasn't Married His Girlfriend
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Hooked up by 1-800-ASK-GARY.
00:02Now, who's taking the stand?
00:04That guy right there.
00:05His name is Davi.
00:09All I know.
00:12He is ready.
00:16Oh, really not?
00:17Yeah, you are.
00:18He looks a little nervous.
00:19He just gave me a look like, really?
00:20You know, he was seated.
00:22Now he's standing.
00:23He's sweating a little bit.
00:24You're ready.
00:24Yeah, that's how you handle it.
00:26All right, three questions from the room.
00:28You get three questions from the audience.
00:29You only get one save.
00:32That is one pass.
00:33All right, Meredith is going first.
00:35All right, Orlando told us just a couple minutes ago
00:38how a wedding got canceled.
00:41He was supposed to officiate because of a bachelor party
00:44that went wrong.
00:45Okay.
00:45So, Davi, I want to hear a strip club story from you.
00:51What is the craziest thing you've ever seen happen
00:55at a strip club?
00:57Oh, man.
00:58Man, the craziest thing I've seen happen at a strip club.
01:03Mind you, he used to work at strip clubs.
01:04Yes, a lot.
01:07Quite a few strip clubs.
01:08So, I'm sure you have several stories.
01:10I've, you know what?
01:11I've seen a lot of indecent acts,
01:14but I would say the craziest thing that I've seen is like,
01:17I think twice, I've seen like an all-out brawl in a club
01:21that it just clears, where it's like 40 people, it seems like,
01:2550 people fighting, chairs being thrown, glasses being broken.
01:28Guys or girls?
01:29Everybody.
01:30Like, just a chaotic scene where mostly guests, like the patrons.
01:36Usually the girls would get out of the way, go to the back,
01:39but guys and girls that were just like attending the club,
01:42getting in really big fights in like a really chaotic scene.
01:46Was it the DJ?
01:48It wasn't the DJ.
01:49It was always over something stupid, minuscule,
01:54and it just turns into a huge thing.
01:56So, I've seen that happen twice, I can remember.
02:00One of the times, there was like a bunch of people
02:02ended up getting arrested, people got hurt pretty bad.
02:05So, yeah, I would say that was the craziest things I've seen.
02:08Yeah, okay.
02:09Big old fight.
02:10Yeah, that didn't happen at this match before.
02:11No.
02:13There was only one punch and it was to the face.
02:15Yes.
02:19All right, buck you up.
02:20All right, Davi, if a plane carrying the entire wild on-air staff
02:25crashed over Antarctica and you were forced to eat the first person
02:29that didn't survive, who would it be?
02:32Oh, my God.
02:36Who was the tastiest?
02:38That's so terrible because I know everybody looking at me.
02:42Because I can feed everybody.
02:44You know what I'm saying?
02:44I mean, everybody would be polite though.
02:46But if you think about it, at this point,
02:48this is the first person that we're eating.
02:50So, we're going for quality over quantity.
02:55Wait, wait.
02:56So, what are you trying to say?
02:57Wow.
02:58My meat is a little gamey?
02:59What are you trying to say?
03:02You've been on the keto for a while.
03:03You've been eating kind of clean.
03:04I feel like probably buckwheat.
03:08Buckwheat probably, you know.
03:10You would eat buckwheat first?
03:11I think buckwheat, yeah.
03:12You might get sick.
03:15But it might get you drunk.
03:17Yeah, that's true.
03:18Ain't no telling.
03:19His meat's been fermented.
03:21Yeah, that's true.
03:23That's true.
03:24All right.
03:25I just thought I was going to be dead on that one.
03:27All right.
03:27All right.
03:28But, Davi, you still got a pass.
03:29I was hoping you wouldn't have a pass for my question.
03:32Oh, man.
03:32What are those?
03:33Davi, since we were talking about the weekend,
03:37I know you do a lot of weddings and stuff as well,
03:39like Meredith's question.
03:41So, mine is,
03:43what is the biggest screw-up that you've ever done
03:49at someone's wedding?
03:51Yeah.
03:52Because it happens.
03:53It happens.
03:54What was the biggest one where you were like,
03:57Jody, they probably not going to give me a Yelta?
03:59Yeah.
03:59They not going to give me that Yelp review.
04:01I immediately thought of it.
04:03I know exactly what it was.
04:04It was actually the first, first, first wedding I ever did,
04:07which just so happened to be one of the biggest still to date.
04:11It was a football player.
04:11I don't know why he picked me.
04:12This was my first time ever doing a wedding.
04:15Dude played for the Miami Dolphins,
04:17had a big, beautiful wedding ceremony,
04:20and I mispronounced the maid of honor's name.
04:25Oh.
04:25I mispronounced her name.
04:27Her name was Selma.
04:29I called her Salima.
04:34I did.
04:36And yelled it, Salima!
04:41It was the most embarrassing thing.
04:44To my own credit.
04:45My only thing that I, it was on me, it was written correctly,
04:52it said Selma, I misread it, I messed up.
04:56But before that, when I lined everybody up,
04:59I always go over the names to make sure,
05:01even, I don't care if your name is Joe, it's Joe, right?
05:04And I called her Salima.
05:06I called her Salima, right to her face, and she did not correct me.
05:11So I'm like, all right, bet.
05:12I got all these names down.
05:14Let's go for the introduction.
05:15I messed up.
05:16Her name was Selma.
05:17This is the maid of honor?
05:18She was the maid of honor, but she could have looked out.
05:20At least it wasn't the bride.
05:21She could have looked out.
05:22It was totally her fault.
05:24She could have looked out.
05:25You know your name.
05:28All right, let's see here on line one.
05:31We have Tiara.
05:32Tiara or Tiara?
05:35Tiara.
05:36Tiara.
05:36How you doing this morning?
05:38I'm doing great in your show.
05:39All right, I'm doing good.
05:40You got a question for Davi here.
05:42What you got for him?
05:44I do.
05:45My question is, Davi, have you ever hooked up with one of the guests
05:49at the weddings that you hosted?
05:52I have not.
05:52I can adamantly say I have not hooked up with anybody from a wedding
05:57that I DJed.
05:58No, I have not.
05:59How many offers?
06:01There have been a couple because people are staying there a lot of times
06:05in the hotel and things like that, but no.
06:09I wouldn't even know if there were offers.
06:11There was people drunk flirting and things like that,
06:14which may have led to something, but no, I never have.
06:18I can honestly say that.
06:20And I've even been doing weddings when I was single,
06:23and it's still, even before I got with my girl, it never happened.
06:27All right.
06:28Sorry.
06:28Oh, I thought I got you.
06:30I thought you did too.
06:32All right.
06:34All right.
06:35Let's see here.
06:36Davi, you have one out of the eight.
06:38One, three.
06:40Davi, what was the craziest lie or line that you've used to get a girl in bed?
06:48Now, of course, this was in your single day.
06:50Right.
06:50There's so many of them, I'm sure.
06:52Yeah, I don't know.
06:53Maybe he ain't had to lie because you know how fabulous Davi is.
06:56That's what he's going to say.
06:58I've never heard the lie.
06:59I just unzipped.
07:00No.
07:01Oh, man.
07:02I can't think of something that I've, man, I'm not really with that fake in the funk.
07:07I'm sure you've lied.
07:07Here we go.
07:09You ain't never had the funk.
07:10Oh, man.
07:12If that's it, that's it.
07:14Your answer's got to be truthful.
07:16I can't recall a time that I had to lie to pull a chick.
07:22I really honestly can't.
07:23I can't think of it.
07:24Pretty much.
07:25I just can't think of it.
07:26I just can't.
07:27It's never really.
07:29I don't know.
07:30I can't think of one.
07:31I wish I had an answer, but I promise on everything I love, I can't recall.
07:35A lie or a line?
07:37A line?
07:37It says, the question is, Davi, what's the craziest lie or line you've used to get a girl
07:44into bed?
07:45Trying to be smooth.
07:46Yeah, it could be a pick-up line.
07:48Yeah, like pick-up line or a lie.
07:50You know, lie, that don't fit.
07:52Girl, look at that fat ass.
07:53You've never had to use a...
07:54Yeah, I've definitely...
07:57What?
07:57Is that yours, man?
07:59It never works.
08:00You're feeling that that was pretty easy.
08:02I'm like, I've flattered girls that didn't really deserve it.
08:05Oh, damn.
08:05Like, honestly, that's a lie, I guess.
08:10Now we're getting to the tune again.
08:13Okay.
08:14Yeah, Meredith inspired me.
08:15I'm probably complimenting some things that weren't there.
08:18Okay.
08:19Like, girl, you are just so beautiful.
08:22Look at that ass.
08:23Yeah.
08:23Okay.
08:24Oh, my God.
08:25Okay, you built her up.
08:27Yeah.
08:27Uh-huh.
08:28All right.
08:31Davi.
08:31That's funny.
08:32Yes.
08:33Okay, out of the three, two, three.
08:35Davi, what is the main reason why you will not marry Joanna?
08:40I won't say I will not.
08:42Hold on.
08:43Let them ask the question, Davi.
08:46You just interrupted.
08:47Damn.
08:48Trying to get to know each other.
08:50After eight years.
08:51Eight years.
08:53Okay.
08:53Like, this person says, like, emotionally-wise, if she holds it down in the house, cooking,
08:59cleaning, et cetera, why isn't there a ring?
09:01A lot of guys would lock that down, since females can't do that besides lay down and
09:07blah, blah, blah.
09:08I feel like I've answered this multiple times.
09:11No, this one is emotional.
09:11I don't think you've answered this one.
09:13Yeah.
09:13Because this one is specific.
09:15Right.
09:15They must pay attention.
09:16What?
09:17Okay, so the specific question, what is preventing me from doing it?
09:19What is the main reason why you will not marry Joanna?
09:23Like, emotionally-wise?
09:24I don't know.
09:25With all of the...
09:26With all of the...
09:26I can't die.
09:37You don't know?
09:38He just don't know.
09:39Bro, after...
09:40Bro.
09:41Like, come on.
09:43Come on.
09:44After eight years, you're supposed to have to answer damn.
09:49Yo, that's two presidential terms.
09:53Dobby is crying right now.
09:55Oh, man.
09:55You know what?
09:56We've prioritized other things in our relationship.
09:59You mean you?
10:00We.
10:00We.
10:00Yeah, yeah, yeah.
10:01We've bought houses together and gone to fabulous places.
10:05I don't say...
10:06I don't want to say I'll never pull the trigger and do it.
10:10I know you're going to do it, but at least you got to at least tell the people, like...
10:13Yeah.
10:14We still get a no-tune.
10:17It's a long time.
10:19I quit.
10:21That's why?
10:22I think so.
10:23That's the main reason?
10:25That's the answer.
10:26Oh, boy.
10:27I don't know.
10:29I don't know.
10:32Somebody says, I am dying right now.
10:36Okay.
10:37You got a boomerang to use.
10:39You did not use your pass.
10:41So, let's see.
10:42He has tears rolling down his face.
10:45I'm just here, though.
10:47I don't know.
10:50I don't know.
10:51I have no idea.
10:56All right.
10:57I'll say, what is the best lie or line that you've used to pick somebody up?
11:02The best one?
11:03Yeah.
11:03Oh.
11:04I pretended to be a cheerleader before.
11:07For who?
11:08You were a cheerleader?
11:09Went from what?
11:10A gator cheerleader.
11:11Oh, no.
11:13Really?
11:16Word.
11:16It worked.
11:17It worked.
11:18It did.
11:19It worked.
11:19I lied a lot.
11:20Did you?
11:22I lied a lot.
11:23I mean, I wasn't pretty.
11:25You know?
11:25So, I had to have something else.
11:26I lied.
11:28I said I played football for Florida State.
11:31This was before you could be Googled.
11:32So, you would have had to really, like, you'd have to go in deep to know, you know, I was
11:37like, I play ball.
11:38Then, the best one was when we were at Mitchell Brothers in San Francisco.
11:45It's a big strip club type of district down in that area.
11:50And I was with Joey Carvello.
11:51Big shout out to Joey Carvello from Priority Records.
11:54He basically told a girl that I was checking out in there.
11:58And, I mean, she was so dope.
12:00And he's like, you got to get a dance from her.
12:02And I was like, she's so fire.
12:03I'm like, I ain't spending for that.
12:04So, he went and paid her and said, hey, I need you to do me a favor.
12:07And Joey's very Hollywood, very dark glasses, tall, older, Jewish guy.
12:12I mean, Italian guy, but, you know, kind of looks Hollywood-ish.
12:17And he told her that I was starring in, because they were making, they were getting ready,
12:22like, all the rumor was about they were going to make Notorious.
12:25And he was like, I need you to do it, but I need you to keep it on low, because he's an
12:29actor.
12:29He's playing Biggie.
12:31Oh, no way.
12:32And she came around the corner, and she saw me.
12:34And I'm like, yo, like, why is she looking like?
12:36And I was like, he's like, I told her, you playing Biggie.
12:38I was like, you what?
12:40And we went in the room, and she talked about Biggie being her favorite rapper for the first,
12:45like, 15 minutes of us being in there.
12:48And it went down.
12:49Wow.
12:49I mean, it went down.
12:51It went down.
12:52I was like, yo, this happens a lot?
12:53He's like, I think it's because you're an actor.
12:55Imagine when the movie came out, and she's like, damn.
12:58She's like, I know him.
12:59That ain't him.
13:01That's not him.
13:02I was like, whatever.
13:03See, I got a ton of lies and stuff that I got to go back and try to remember.
13:11But one of the lines that me and my buddy used to use, we used to go to the beach and
13:15take our shirts off and tell girls our names were vicious and delicious.
13:19What?
13:19And rub each other down with baby oil and try to, like, try to flex and stuff.
13:25Vicious and delicious.
13:26Vicious and delicious.
13:28And, like, y'all were, like, wrestlers?
13:30No, we were just normal guys.
13:31We were just oiled up white dudes.
13:33Yeah.
13:34Rubbing oil on each other.
13:36This is something Dobby in Orlando would never do.
13:39Nah.
13:40Hey, you not going to call me delicious.
13:43Secondly, you not rubbing oil on me.
13:45Yeah, we rode there in our scooters, our matching scooters.
13:48We had baby oil to rub each other down, turn our hats backwards.
13:51You know, like spring break style.
13:53And this was to pick up chicks?
13:54Oh, it worked daily, by the way.
13:57Because they were wasted.
13:58All of them girls had a lot of choices.
14:03Dobby, you have officially finished, played, finished.
14:08He just still doesn't know.
14:09Still don't know.
14:11Ready to get married yet?
14:12Nope.
14:13Still don't know.
14:13All right, we got more coming up.
14:15It's show free.