Jeff Fenster and his guest Jimmy Rex spoke on his inspiring journey and the principles that have guided him towards a vast track record of success.
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00:00 We subconsciously can't trust the love we're getting
00:02 because we think if they truly knew me,
00:04 they wouldn't actually love me.
00:06 The amount of life we feel like we've lived
00:07 is gonna be equivalent to the exceptional moments we've had.
00:09 You did undercover work to rescue children from sex trafficking.
00:13 11 sting operations.
00:15 If your person isn't your safe person, like, what are you?
00:28 Today on the show, we have someone who is a real estate expert,
00:31 having sold over 5,000 homes.
00:33 He's owner of the We Are The They coaching program,
00:36 an enthusiastic world traveler,
00:38 having already visited over 99 countries,
00:41 worked undercover to rescue children from sex trafficking,
00:44 and on top of all that, is a serial entrepreneur
00:47 who has his hands in over 20 companies and 15 restaurants.
00:50 If that's not enough, he's the author of You End Up Where You're Heading,
00:54 which is an incredible book,
00:55 giving him the reputation as the most interesting man.
00:58 Please welcome my good friend, Jimmy Rex.
01:01 What's up, man? Thanks for having me.
01:03 Thanks for coming on, Jimmy.
01:04 Yeah, dude, this is fun.
01:05 I'm genuinely excited to have you on the show.
01:06 I've been itching to have this interview
01:09 just because of all the things I just said.
01:10 I mean, you are one of the most interesting men I know and inspiration.
01:14 And I have to just--
01:15 The first thing I have to know is,
01:17 how did you see yourself when you were a kid?
01:19 Did you see yourself doing all these things
01:20 or is there something you really wanted to do when you were a kid?
01:22 It's pretty funny.
01:23 I like to ask my family members or friends
01:25 that have known me for a long time.
01:27 They like to laugh about certain things.
01:29 And I have one buddy, he's like,
01:30 "Dude, you just were always doing whatever came to your mind.
01:34 You would just go and do it.
01:35 And you were genuinely confused
01:36 when people didn't understand that that wasn't normal."
01:39 So I just, if I had an idea, I'd go with it.
01:41 I'd just do something.
01:42 And so it's a blessing and a curse.
01:44 But so far, I've been to--
01:46 Actually, just got back from a trip.
01:47 I'm now at 105 countries.
01:49 And people say, "Well, where do you find time to go travel like that?"
01:52 And it's like, I just go and just go do it.
01:54 I just make it the priority or whatever I'm doing.
01:56 And I've always been pretty good at trying to figure things out.
01:59 And I haven't been afraid.
02:00 It's a gift that I had when I was younger
02:02 is I tried a lot of things and a lot of them didn't work.
02:05 And I use that word verbiage very carefully
02:08 because most people would say I failed, but I didn't fail.
02:11 They just didn't work.
02:12 But I always still got a benefit
02:14 every time those things didn't work.
02:16 And so I'd see that even though
02:17 maybe this didn't become what I wanted to
02:19 or maybe this thing didn't end up in the end working,
02:21 I always met new people and got more experience.
02:24 And I saw that people looked up to me
02:26 not because I was accomplishing these things,
02:28 but because I was trying these things.
02:30 And so it really, I guess you could say,
02:32 kind of inspired myself to really just keep doing that.
02:35 And that's where you end up with this really crazy, interesting life.
02:38 Well, there's going to be an autobiography written about your life.
02:42 And I'm just curious to see what the title's going to be.
02:44 Who do you think's going to play you?
02:46 Who? Who would play me in an autobiography?
02:47 I mean, I'd like to--
02:48 In a movie, who would play you?
02:49 It's got to be somebody that's currently younger than me.
02:50 I don't really know any of the younger actors, I guess,
02:52 because it'll be coming up.
02:53 But if I had to pick someone today, maybe like,
02:55 I'd love to have like, I mean, Ryan Reynolds would be my first choice.
02:58 That'd be funny too.
02:59 Yeah, I could see that working.
03:01 Yeah.
03:01 So of the 105 countries you've now been to,
03:04 what was your favorite country and your least favorite country?
03:07 You know, I made a video about this recently on TikTok
03:09 and it got a lot of people.
03:10 It's got over 4 million views now
03:12 because so many people got upset by it.
03:13 But I couldn't really name one because it's so hard to pick one.
03:16 But here's what I say is if you're dying in two weeks,
03:18 you got one place you still can go and you've never been anywhere.
03:21 Yeah.
03:21 You've got-- and this is what upset people.
03:23 I said, you got to go to Africa.
03:25 Specifically, I went-- my place I picked in Africa is Victoria Falls.
03:30 Because it's funny because that's how social media works, right?
03:32 That video went viral because all these idiots kept posting,
03:34 Africa's not a country, Africa's not a country.
03:36 It's like, no shit.
03:36 I went on to say, go to Zimbabwe, which is Victoria Falls.
03:41 But the thing is, because-- have you ever been there, by the way?
03:43 I have not.
03:44 Dude, you've got to go.
03:45 It's just a different world.
03:46 I mean, you're literally--
03:47 I remember one day I'm walking in our resort.
03:49 We were staying at this nice resort.
03:50 And there's these two giant giraffe statues, right?
03:53 Like on the side of the path.
03:54 It's like 10 o'clock at night.
03:55 I'm just walking from the pool to my room or something.
03:58 And I look.
03:59 I'm like, man, those look so real.
04:00 And all of a sudden, the one just turns its neck.
04:03 Just two giraffes just sitting there.
04:05 And I remember we were driving the next day.
04:06 And we had to wait for elephants to cross the road.
04:09 And we went and slept out in the bush.
04:10 And 200 feet away the next morning, we found a pack of lions.
04:14 And I mean, the whole night, you got trees where monkeys
04:17 are swinging overhead.
04:18 And it's just insane.
04:19 I mean, it's just this different world.
04:21 And by the way, you hear about all the dangers
04:23 of all these places.
04:25 And I'll be honest.
04:25 Like when you go look for problems, you'll find them.
04:28 I learned that doing undercover work, right?
04:30 But otherwise, you just don't.
04:32 People are so excited to see you.
04:33 They're so happy to have you there.
04:35 I just got back from Saudi Arabia recently.
04:37 Wow, how was that?
04:38 Yeah, and I mean, you would think like, oh, that's scary, right?
04:40 You just perked up in your chair.
04:42 It made me tingle.
04:43 It was me like my goosebumps.
04:44 Well, and that's the thing that's craziest.
04:45 Until 2019, tourists couldn't even go there.
04:48 You had to go there for government business or whatever.
04:51 And dude, the people could not have been nicer.
04:54 They couldn't have been more, like they either didn't give
04:57 a care that we were there or they were so excited
04:58 to see these two guys.
04:59 We went to the World Cup in Qatar.
05:01 And so while we were there, we slipped over
05:02 to Saudi Arabia.
05:03 But they were genuinely so excited to have us there.
05:06 And I didn't once feel in danger.
05:09 You know, I've been to all these places
05:10 that are supposed to be dangerous and they're just not.
05:12 Again, it's, now I will say this, with Saudi Arabia,
05:15 we had this little moment where we went to,
05:17 it's the second most holy site in all of Islam.
05:19 And this is where places, where people get scared to travel
05:22 'cause you can innocently make mistakes.
05:24 But me and my buddy were like, he's like,
05:25 well, let's go see if we can enter.
05:26 And I'd already researched it.
05:27 You can't go in this building.
05:28 It's like where Muhammad was like either born or died,
05:31 one of the two, I don't know.
05:32 But anyway, and we were like, go up to the front.
05:35 And the security guy's like, yeah, go ahead.
05:37 And this mosque, to give you an idea,
05:38 holds a million people.
05:39 They've had over a million people in it.
05:41 It's ginormous.
05:42 And it's literally the second most holy place
05:44 in all of Islam.
05:46 The first one, you can't even, Mecca,
05:47 you can't even go in the city if you're not Muslim.
05:51 And so we go, and the guy's like, yeah, go ahead.
05:53 And we're like, wait, what?
05:54 And so the next thing we know, we're in this building.
05:56 We asked him like three times.
05:57 He's like, yeah, no, you're good, go ahead.
05:58 And there was-- - He speaks English?
06:01 - Yeah, I mean, understood enough, yeah.
06:02 We were just like, can we go?
06:03 And we were pointing at the door, you know?
06:04 He's like, yeah, yeah, go ahead.
06:06 And we ended up going through this thing.
06:08 We kind of just participated in it
06:10 'cause it's kind of cool that, you know,
06:11 the prayer's going off and everything.
06:13 I always try to do that when I travel.
06:14 Just, you know, I've done the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem,
06:16 and I've done, you know, different Hindu and Buddha things
06:19 in, you know, Indonesia and some of these other places.
06:21 But, and I'm sitting there,
06:23 and they had hundreds of thousands of Korans
06:25 like stacked up in this temple, I guess you'd call it,
06:28 on this mosque.
06:29 And we're both just like, oh, they probably just,
06:32 like, you take one, like, if you wanna read the Koran.
06:35 And we're like, what a cool way to get our first Koran.
06:37 And so we walk out with these books,
06:38 thinking nothing of it.
06:40 We're just like, literally, like,
06:42 kind of just getting into this whole culture and everything.
06:46 And next thing we know, this undercover security guy
06:48 is like, where'd you guys get those?
06:49 And we realized, oh, no,
06:52 we might've just accidentally stolen these books,
06:54 the most holy book in Islam,
06:55 out of their second most holy building.
06:57 We're gonna get our arms chipped off.
06:58 And it caused a whole few hours of chaos.
07:02 But other than that, it was so beautiful.
07:03 And so anyway, it's kind of a longer story,
07:05 but kind of, I just love the adventure of travel.
07:07 But, you know, you see why some people don't.
07:09 You hear a story like that,
07:10 and you're like, yeah, maybe I'll just go to Boston.
07:12 - Well, hold on, I need to know how this story ends.
07:14 - Okay, so-- - 'Cause you have your arms,
07:15 you're sitting here today with hands.
07:17 - Well, and so the guy took, well, my buddy kind of panicked.
07:20 I'm a, again, I'm a very,
07:22 I call myself a professional traveler.
07:23 Like, I know what to do, not to do.
07:24 He's like, where are you guys staying?
07:25 And I just point, I'm like, I don't know what it's called.
07:27 It's some Muslim name or whatever, or Arabic name.
07:30 And the guy's like, well,
07:31 I need to see pictures of your IDs.
07:33 And I'm like, I don't have mine on me.
07:35 And my buddy pulls his out, and he's like, here you go.
07:37 And so he took a picture of his visa.
07:40 And so we left, and my buddy was like,
07:42 and he's got a wife and kids,
07:43 so it's kind of interesting, because I don't.
07:46 So I'm up for the challenge.
07:47 I'm up for the adventure, right?
07:48 But he starts kind of freaking out a little bit.
07:50 He's like, dude, I wish that guy hadn't taken my ID.
07:51 And I haven't even thought about it.
07:52 I was like-- - He didn't give it back?
07:53 He took it?
07:54 - He just took a picture of it.
07:54 But I'm like, but he's got his information now.
07:56 And we've been in Saudi Arabia for four hours.
07:59 Keep in mind, I have booked the nicest resort,
08:02 and it's called Al Ula.
08:03 It's like the up-and-coming place
08:04 where they want tourists to come to Saudi Arabia.
08:06 It's literally one of the nicest resorts in the world.
08:08 We're going to Qatar for the World Cup.
08:10 I've dropped eight grand on tickets and hotels
08:13 and the whole thing, you know?
08:14 And we called our buddy, who used to be Muslim,
08:18 and he said, hey, here's what happened.
08:19 We're kind of a little bit worried.
08:21 My buddy, particularly, he was just really worried,
08:23 but I get it.
08:24 He's got a wife and kid.
08:25 And this guy, our buddy, Haysom, he's like,
08:28 well, how do I explain this to you guys?
08:31 You went into their most holy place and touched,
08:33 you are dirty.
08:34 They consider you dirty, filthy dirty.
08:36 And you touched their most holy book.
08:37 You basically stole it, not knowing you were stealing it.
08:40 And then you went and put it back.
08:41 He's like, what would it be the equivalent
08:44 of here in the States?
08:44 He goes, probably trying to assassinate
08:47 the President of the United States.
08:48 I'm like, what?
08:49 That's not even close.
08:50 But like, and my buddy loses it.
08:52 He goes, we're gone, we're out.
08:53 So this is the actual story.
08:55 So we've been there for four hours.
08:57 He goes, I'm going around the back way.
08:58 Get the car.
08:59 We're going to the airport.
09:00 We're out of Saudi Arabia.
09:01 And I'm like, you gotta be kidding me.
09:02 I'm just like beside myself, right?
09:04 - You wanna stay.
09:05 - Yeah, I'm like, we're here.
09:07 Yeah, well, this point I'm like,
09:09 after he said that, he's like, you guys,
09:10 you've gotta get out of there.
09:11 Get the next flight out.
09:12 And there was a, it was like 530 at night.
09:14 There's a flight to Dubai at 130,
09:15 which is a Western Middle East, right?
09:17 Like, I mean, you're good there if you're an American.
09:20 You're good everywhere, I think.
09:20 But anyway, and so I'm like, hey, we got this flight at 130.
09:25 He goes, no, we gotta catch an earlier flight.
09:26 So we go there and he's like, there's a flight to Egypt.
09:29 It's eight hours in the wrong direction.
09:30 $4,000 ticket.
09:32 I'm like, I'm so bugged.
09:33 I'm like, you've got to be kidding me.
09:35 But then there's the part of me that's like,
09:36 if it's even one in a thousand chance
09:38 that we get put in a Saudi prison,
09:40 I guess we gotta probably go.
09:41 - Yeah, and I'm with your buddy here.
09:43 - I know, and I'm sitting there thinking to myself,
09:45 I'm like, I can deal with being in jail for five years
09:47 for this mistake, truly.
09:48 I would figure that out.
09:50 If my buddy's in the cell next to me,
09:51 missing his wife and kid,
09:53 there's not a day's gonna go by
09:54 I'm not gonna wanna kill myself.
09:55 - You could handle five years in a--
09:57 - No, but I would-- - Mentally?
09:58 - Like, I was willing to risk one in a thousand on it.
10:01 How's that? - Fair, fair.
10:02 - And no, I mean, if it was one in a hundred,
10:04 I'm probably still bailing out.
10:05 But we did, we went to the airport,
10:06 we turned in our rental car,
10:07 but the flight was booked.
10:10 There was no flights for three more hours.
10:12 Well, my buddy that went with me,
10:13 he's close, close friends with this guy
10:16 who's royalty in the Seychelles,
10:17 which is a Muslim country.
10:19 And finally, he woke up, it was like 5.30 in Utah,
10:22 and he called him back and he said,
10:23 listen, here's what happened.
10:25 And the guy said, look, you're good.
10:27 I have connections everywhere.
10:30 If worst case scenario happens,
10:31 you should be fine.
10:32 But that being said,
10:34 you actually can go in the building like they said.
10:36 Probably wouldn't have taken the Quran out,
10:38 but there is argument to like,
10:39 it's not just like you stole this off with your hands.
10:42 It's like you get to go to a court
10:44 and justify or talk about it.
10:46 Like you get to represent,
10:48 you know, that like, hey, here's what happened.
10:50 And once we did that, he goes,
10:51 honestly, go enjoy your trip, you're fine.
10:53 We went and everything was--
10:54 - So you left the airport.
10:55 - We went, yeah, I had to go get a new rental car.
10:57 And then we just went and enjoyed the rest of our trip.
10:59 - Wow, wow.
11:01 - Yeah, pretty wild.
11:02 - That is pretty wild.
11:03 - And I live for those kinds of experiences, dude.
11:04 That's what I literally try to create,
11:06 just chaos and fun experiences.
11:08 'Cause I believe at the end of our lives,
11:10 the amount of life we feel like we've lived
11:12 is gonna be equivalent to the exceptional moments we've had.
11:14 And it's like those moments that you create.
11:16 I mean, watching me and my buddy go through this,
11:18 so funny.
11:19 And 98% of me was laughing my ass off,
11:22 2% pissed off.
11:24 The whole thing was just like,
11:26 I knew it in the middle of it.
11:27 I'm like, this is chaos.
11:28 And we're gonna laugh our asses off
11:29 for the next 30 years about this.
11:31 But it felt like a movie.
11:32 Like it felt like we did need to get out of the country.
11:35 - I mean, you had me at the edge of my seat
11:37 because when you said it's the equivalent
11:38 of assassinating the president.
11:40 - Don't ever call him again.
11:41 Jeez Louise, man.
11:43 Yeah, that was the part that kind of set off my buddy.
11:46 Even if you think that that's the equivalent,
11:47 you don't wanna say that to your buddies
11:48 that are still there.
11:49 It's like a little bit alarming, you know?
11:51 - Well, so this is what I love about my own show
11:54 is I get to be curious and ask these questions
11:55 and learn from successful people.
11:57 'Cause I believe success is formulaic.
11:59 I think that if you reverse engineer success
12:01 from all successful people,
12:02 there's a bunch of common traits.
12:05 Do you give much thought,
12:06 do you have like certain core values that you hold dear
12:08 or that you will call your success formula?
12:10 - Yeah, so I have a couple things.
12:12 So, you know, I went through Date with Destiny
12:16 with Tony Robbins several years ago
12:17 and you spent a week trying to figure out,
12:19 you know, your values and your principle question,
12:22 your primary question.
12:23 And you figure out, you know, your life's purpose
12:26 and all these things.
12:27 And I really dug into it that week.
12:28 I mean, you're putting in 14, 16 hour days
12:30 because I wanted to answer that question.
12:31 And most people I don't think have ever done enough
12:33 to really figure that.
12:34 So my whole course that I teach,
12:37 my We Are The They men's coaching group,
12:39 it's based off the three principles, three core values,
12:41 which is vulnerable, authentic, and in integrity.
12:45 And the principle is kind of this.
12:46 When you're out of integrity,
12:47 when you're not being who you truly are,
12:50 when you're not letting yourself be seen for who you are,
12:52 the love that we receive,
12:53 whether it's from a spouse, from friends or whoever,
12:57 we subconsciously can't trust the love we're getting
13:00 because we think if they truly knew me,
13:01 they wouldn't actually love me.
13:03 And so I can't tell you how many guys
13:04 I've had come through the program where they'll say that,
13:07 you know, they finally get into integrity
13:08 with their wife or girlfriend, whatever they need to do.
13:11 They get vulnerable and talk about things
13:14 that they thought they would.
13:15 You know, I have, I mean, it's crazy the amount of,
13:17 Steve Weatherford came and spoke to my group yesterday
13:19 and so did Bedros Kouli.
13:20 And both guys were molested as kids.
13:23 And they said one in four adult men
13:25 were probably molested as kids.
13:26 It's a crazy stat.
13:27 - Wow.
13:28 - And to hear those guys talk about it,
13:29 and I've heard so many influencers
13:31 and different people talk about that now.
13:32 And in my program, there's been multiple guys
13:35 that had never told a soul that had been molested,
13:36 thought they were awful people.
13:37 It's really confusing too because, you know,
13:40 they start thinking like they kind of enjoy it.
13:42 Like it's all this really weird thing
13:44 that still feels good.
13:45 And as you hear them finally open up
13:47 for the first time in their lives,
13:48 they feel safe to talk about it.
13:50 That vulnerability, they think if anyone ever knew this
13:52 about me, they wouldn't love me.
13:53 That's what Bedros spoke to and so did Steve.
13:56 And same with my guys.
13:58 But truly, it's when they're most lovable.
14:00 You've never been more loved.
14:01 You're innocent.
14:02 You're, you know, and then all of a sudden,
14:04 they feel so loved.
14:05 And they always say the same thing.
14:06 They're like, wow, for the first time in my life,
14:08 I know my wife loves me.
14:09 I know that I'm loved.
14:09 I know that you guys love me.
14:11 And so these principles, the whole basis of it
14:14 is to break that energetic block
14:15 between you and your spouse or you and whoever you need to,
14:18 where instead of doing surface bullshit
14:20 or just trying to get around these things,
14:23 you have to be able to,
14:23 if your person isn't your safe person,
14:25 like, what are you doing?
14:26 Like, get to that place of vulnerability
14:28 where you truly can be a broken man or person
14:32 and be loved in that state
14:34 'cause then you're completely empowered to go forward.
14:36 And so I would say those are the three principles
14:38 that kind of guide.
14:39 Now, when it comes to business itself,
14:42 I honestly think it's this simple.
14:44 My mentor, Mike Ferry in real estate,
14:45 when I got into real estate,
14:47 this guy, I mean, my first year of coaching with him,
14:49 I sold 98 houses with one assistant.
14:52 And this quote was on my wall.
14:53 I literally wrote it on my wall.
14:55 It said, "The difference between successful
14:57 "and unsuccessful people is successful people
14:59 "merely have learned to do the things
15:00 "that unsuccessful people don't wanna do."
15:02 And hard work, as he would always say,
15:04 real estate is simple, it's not easy.
15:06 He said, "There's three things you have to do.
15:07 "Number one, learn exactly what to do,
15:10 "exactly what to say.
15:11 "Two, get really good at doing it,
15:14 "learn exactly how to say it the right way,
15:16 "even the tone, NLP, all that stuff."
15:18 He said, "And then the third thing is just do it all day."
15:21 That's literally that simple.
15:22 And then I went on to become the number one agent in Utah
15:25 for basically for a decade, and over and over
15:27 was getting all these different national awards and things.
15:29 And I literally, that was all it was.
15:30 It was like I learned exactly what to say,
15:32 I memorized scripts, then I learned how to say them
15:35 so it didn't sound like a script.
15:37 And I just learned from the best people in the country.
15:38 I'd literally go fly out and spend time with them,
15:40 just like I do with coming here in San Diego
15:42 and spending time with people
15:43 that are just much more advanced than I am.
15:44 I'd just copy all the best stuff I learned,
15:46 and then I just did it all day.
15:47 I was relentlessly working to be the best.
15:50 And that's how I built it.
15:53 - So that's how we get to 5,000 homes sold.
15:56 - Yeah, well, and then I guess the only other thing
15:57 I would add to that is you have to have
15:59 the right people around you.
16:01 That first key hire, that second key hire.
16:03 I got a real estate partner right now,
16:04 so I kind of turned over my real estate team to him.
16:06 I do the networking and a lot of the marketing
16:08 and stuff still, but he's really the machine behind it,
16:11 selling all the homes now.
16:13 And we do a lot of investment properties
16:14 all over the country.
16:15 And so we work with investors left and right.
16:17 And he's so good.
16:19 All I have to do is get somebody in front of him,
16:21 and I know they're going to get an A+ experience.
16:24 - Which is what it's all about.
16:25 - Yeah, and then my assistant, Chris,
16:27 for all these years, he was my right hand.
16:29 I mean, he's so good.
16:31 He never missed a thing.
16:32 So many people have the wrong hire,
16:34 so they spend all day worrying about things
16:36 they've given to somebody else to do.
16:38 And I knew if I gave him something to do, it was done.
16:41 I didn't have to worry about it.
16:42 I didn't have to follow up with it.
16:42 I never had to worry where my money was.
16:44 I didn't have to worry about the client being taken care of.
16:46 They got an A+ experience,
16:47 and they'd always say the same thing.
16:49 We just love Chris.
16:50 He's so nice.
16:50 I mean, if it got to me, if I had to step in,
16:53 shit was going south.
16:54 You know what I mean?
16:55 Like, I was the guy you called
16:55 when you needed to save a deal or whatever.
16:57 Otherwise, I was just out getting more business,
16:58 more business.
16:59 - You know what I love about what you just said, though?
17:01 And I think it's important.
17:01 You didn't say, "If I get someone in front of him,
17:04 "we sold the deal."
17:05 You said, "They're going to get a great experience."
17:07 And I don't know if you realize that
17:09 consciously or subconsciously,
17:10 but that is the difference between,
17:12 'cause I was really good in sales as well.
17:13 And no one wanted to ask me,
17:14 "How are you so good in sales?"
17:15 It's because I created an experience
17:17 and I didn't worry about selling.
17:19 - Yeah, I mean, you know this.
17:20 If you do your job and you take care of people,
17:22 you don't ever have to worry about the money.
17:24 You just don't.
17:25 You just never do.
17:26 And with our team, you know, well, it's interesting.
17:28 So 2007, '08, '09, I watched everyone lose their ass, right?
17:32 I would sit across the table from these couples
17:33 that had bought these investment homes
17:35 from other realtors and things,
17:36 and they were upside down, 100 grand.
17:38 I mean, I watched people divorce in front of me, you know?
17:41 And I have PTSD from that.
17:42 And so what I realized, when I started buying real estate,
17:45 I had the worst advice from people.
17:46 And it was really hard to get good advice back then.
17:48 Now there's a million ways you can get this information,
17:50 but I keep it so simple.
17:52 And we can do this at the end when we do.
17:54 You'll talk to me like I'm five, maybe.
17:55 But I just wanted to be the person I needed
17:57 when I started investing in real estate.
17:59 'Cause if I'd had somebody teach me the right formula,
18:01 oh my gosh, I owned 13 properties in 2006.
18:05 I bought most of them the wrong way.
18:06 My mentor came to me, Mike Ferry,
18:08 and he said, "You need to sell everything."
18:10 So I did.
18:11 I did all but two. - You took the advice.
18:12 - Oh yeah, oh, he's the goat.
18:14 I mean, the dude, whatever he said, that was for me.
18:16 But he said that, and so I kept two,
18:18 'cause I was living in one,
18:19 and I had a business partner living in the other one.
18:20 I ended up losing my ass on those two, lost about 150K.
18:23 But all the rest I got out of, thankfully.
18:26 I mean, there was one house we bought.
18:27 I remember we bought it for 312.
18:29 And I partnered with my brother, Matt.
18:32 And if I had not got rid of that,
18:33 it would have caused us the biggest riff in our family.
18:35 'Cause we ended up selling it at 305 once he said to sell.
18:37 I took a loss.
18:38 I ate the loss, which hurt back then.
18:40 I mean, I think I had to eat
18:41 after commissions like seven or eight grand.
18:43 But that house sold a year later for like 210.
18:47 And it would have just,
18:48 I know those numbers don't seem like big numbers now.
18:50 Back then, that was, I mean, that was everything I had.
18:52 - I mean, how old were you?
18:53 - I was 24.
18:54 - That's 100 grand to a 24-year-old?
18:56 - Yeah, I know.
18:57 - That's a million dollars to most people today.
18:59 - For sure.
19:00 And so, but I took that advice.
19:02 But ultimately, so what me and Tyler have done
19:05 so beautifully is every single investor
19:06 that wants to work with us,
19:07 we make them do a strategy session with us first.
19:10 It's a half hour to 45 minutes.
19:11 We sit down and say, what are your goals?
19:12 What are you trying to do?
19:13 What are you truly trying to do?
19:14 How much money do you actually have?
19:15 How quickly, what's your risk tolerance?
19:18 How quickly do you want to try to do this?
19:20 And so we can map this thing out.
19:22 And all these agents in Utah, especially in California,
19:25 they were selling investment properties, $580,000 townhomes.
19:28 It was like, hello, I've watched this movie.
19:30 I know how it ends.
19:32 And sure as shit, it all flipped.
19:33 And everybody gets stuck with these horrible deals.
19:35 We never, we switched,
19:36 we stopped selling investment homes in Utah
19:38 almost two and a half years ago
19:39 because the numbers no longer made sense.
19:41 And we would just focus on three key things
19:44 and we make sure every investor, it fits that formula.
19:46 And so when the market started going down last May,
19:48 I mean, it's dropped,
19:49 the median price in the country has dropped 15 to 20%
19:51 in most areas.
19:53 We don't have a single investor
19:55 that got put in a bad situation, not one.
19:57 We don't have a single one
19:58 because we never broke these principle rules
20:00 that he and I learned the first go around.
20:02 And that's the difference between hiring.
20:03 I mean, I look back now, I'm like,
20:05 geez, just off hard work alone,
20:06 I was hustling and getting a lot of deals.
20:08 But you compare like me now versus me when I was 25
20:12 and I'm a hundred times smarter realtor now than then.
20:15 And so it's like, you see how experience
20:16 does work for people.
20:17 But that was kind of the thing that we decided to do
20:20 'cause I just wanted to be that source that I needed,
20:22 honestly, and we'd do that.
20:24 And that's why people,
20:25 I mean, I haven't had to make a cold call since 2010.
20:28 I used to call for sale by owners every morning
20:30 for three hours straight, 30 to 40, every single day.
20:32 - Smiling down.
20:33 - It was all it was, but I got really good at it.
20:36 - As an entrepreneur, I know how meaningful it is
20:38 to invest in the people and causes that are close to me.
20:42 And on GoFundMe, it's easy, safe,
20:44 and powerful to do just that.
20:46 Whether you're supporting a family member,
20:48 friend, local business, or charity.
20:51 And whenever you make a donation,
20:53 you're protected by the GoFundMe giving guarantee.
20:56 Visit GoFundMe.com today
20:59 to help make a positive difference in your community.
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21:30 Now, let's get after those goals.
21:32 And now I just, my clients,
21:36 they just, they know where to find us.
21:38 It's all word of mouth and we're just growing like crazy.
21:41 - So right now in today's economy, today's climate,
21:44 you still buying homes?
21:45 - So here's the number one thing with real estate.
21:46 I'll just give the rules real quick because this is--
21:48 - Teach me.
21:49 - Yeah, this is the way you never get in trouble
21:50 in real estate, no matter what.
21:51 Is as long as it has, if you buy the right property, sure.
21:55 And that's the answer for any market.
21:57 But if you buy the wrong property, no.
21:59 And just give you a quick little thing.
22:00 I wrote a real estate book.
22:01 I interviewed the top 100 millennial real estate agents
22:03 across the country.
22:04 It's called The Next Wave of Influence in Real Estate.
22:05 I wrote it about four or five years ago.
22:06 - It's a bestseller.
22:07 - Yeah, no, it's fine.
22:09 It's not my best work, but it's like,
22:11 it had a couple really cool things for new agents
22:13 that you could learn by studying successful people.
22:16 One of the questions I asked them was,
22:18 what does your own real estate investment portfolio
22:20 look like?
22:20 And 50 of the 100 agents
22:21 didn't even own a real estate property.
22:23 Most realtors don't truly know these rules of investing,
22:26 and that's where people get in trouble
22:27 'cause their cousin or uncle,
22:28 they're trying to go to the same realtor.
22:30 But anyway, so long story short,
22:31 the formula is basically this
22:33 to make sure that you buy correctly.
22:34 Number one, and you can't violate this rule no matter what,
22:37 is the property has to cashflow no matter what.
22:40 And for every 100 grand you spend,
22:41 it should cashflow 100 bucks.
22:43 That's conservative, that's doable, that's--
22:46 - Every 100 grand, it should cashflow 100 bucks.
22:48 - Grand that it cost, it should cashflow at least 100 bucks.
22:50 That's like pretty damn easy to get.
22:52 - So a $300,000 house,
22:53 if I don't pull $300 into my pocket--
22:55 - As a minimum, that should be your cashflow.
22:58 - Yeah, yep. - After everything.
22:59 - Yes, and that's the number one principle
23:01 that you never violate.
23:02 - Does that include insurance, property tax?
23:04 - That's all in, yep.
23:05 After your PITI,
23:07 which is principal interest taxes and insurance,
23:08 you wanna make sure it cashflows $300 a month.
23:10 So think of it this way.
23:11 So I'll give you a quick example.
23:12 When the real estate market in 2007, '08,
23:16 I bought a property, I paid 285 for it.
23:19 I got a first for 80% of the loan
23:21 and a second for 20% of the loan.
23:23 You could do that back then, nothing down, right?
23:24 - I did one of those too. - Exactly.
23:26 - We called them liar loans, I think.
23:27 - Yeah, so I was-- - Stated income?
23:28 - Yep, so I was at 285, market went up to 350.
23:32 I hung onto it.
23:33 Well, the market ended up tanking down.
23:35 By the way, I was upside down.
23:36 I was renting it for 1,500 a month.
23:38 I think my payment was like 2,300 a month.
23:40 So I'm losing 800 bucks a month.
23:41 I justified it 'cause I knew it was going up at the time.
23:43 I didn't know what I was doing.
23:44 I did it wrong.
23:45 That's why I'm qualified now, 'cause I learned the hard way.
23:47 This is firsthand experience.
23:49 And what happened was when the market started to tank,
23:53 I couldn't afford it anymore.
23:55 I'm upside down, $800 a month.
23:57 So it dropped the value of it all the way to 215.
24:00 That's where I had to sell it because I had to get rid of it.
24:02 I couldn't afford the $800 a month anymore.
24:04 The bank knew I was making a lot of money
24:06 'cause I was still selling a lot of homes.
24:07 I just didn't have any money 'cause I had bad decisions.
24:09 And so they made me keep the loan, 0% interest.
24:12 So every month, the payment would go towards full principal.
24:15 But I got stuck with two houses doing this
24:18 for 140, $150,000.
24:20 - Was it a short sale?
24:21 - It was a short sale, but not really
24:22 'cause I had to keep the loan.
24:23 They wouldn't let me do it on a short sale
24:26 'cause they knew I was making 300, 400 grand a year still.
24:28 So I literally got stuck with two house payments
24:30 with no houses.
24:32 That's when you know you've really screwed up.
24:34 But the point of that was is that house,
24:36 two and a half years ago, sold for $650,000.
24:41 If it had the cashflow and I could have held onto it,
24:44 'cause if the cashflow is even 100 bucks
24:46 or even if you're breaking even, hell,
24:48 then I can keep that through the downturn.
24:50 You're paying down your principal.
24:52 So there's four, five, 600 bucks a month.
24:54 You're saving on taxes, which you can save a ton on
24:57 if you know what you're doing.
24:58 And appreciation eventually started coming back like crazy
25:02 after it bottomed out in 2011.
25:04 So if I'd have hung onto that,
25:05 if I could have hung onto it,
25:06 I would have ended up making several hundred thousand
25:09 dollars 10 years later.
25:10 Well, Tyler, my partner at the same time,
25:12 bought a house in another city for 185.
25:15 It dropped to 130.
25:16 He was cash flowing $100 a month, that's it.
25:19 But because that house payment was covering itself,
25:23 when it dropped to 130, he just kept his renter in,
25:25 paid down his principal.
25:26 Eventually the house paid itself off.
25:27 He sold it, that two and a half years ago, for $400,000.
25:31 So the only difference between what I did
25:33 and what Tyler did is that cashflow that he had
25:35 to be able to weather the storm.
25:36 So right now, I own over 30 real estate properties,
25:39 all single family homes.
25:40 I don't have to sell any of them.
25:41 Every single one of them is cash flowing me.
25:43 Every single one of them, I'm paying down principal.
25:45 I'm getting huge tax breaks.
25:47 It's perfect.
25:48 And so I'll just wait till the market comes back up
25:50 and then I'll sell it.
25:51 So am I buying right now?
25:52 Yes, I still, I flip homes, I do all that stuff.
25:55 If you have the right property right now, hell yeah, buy it.
25:57 But if it's an investment,
25:59 you just don't wanna violate that rule.
26:00 - Rule number one. - Yeah, cashflow.
26:01 - Is there a second rule or is it just rule number one?
26:03 - I have a lot of other little rules.
26:04 Like number two is if the market were to tank tomorrow
26:06 and you're still glad you own the home,
26:08 you have a good property.
26:09 - Regardless of the value?
26:10 - Yeah, because if you're glad you still own it,
26:13 it means you bought it right.
26:14 You know, it means that you're not upside down.
26:16 It means that you're making money on it still.
26:18 So that's kind of like a generic way to look at it.
26:20 But ask yourself if you're buying a real estate property
26:22 and you go, no, this property is gonna go down 25% tomorrow,
26:25 would you still wanna own that property
26:27 at the place you're getting it?
26:28 And if the answer is yes, it's a good property.
26:29 - So how much do you put down on a rental?
26:31 - 20% on everything.
26:33 - Not more?
26:34 - No, not usually.
26:35 I have a few that are paid off just 'cause when you,
26:36 once you start getting too many loans, you have to,
26:39 you can kind of max out.
26:40 So I'll get part of it. - But do you play with
26:41 how much down to make sure you make that certain cashflow?
26:43 - Yeah, so I mean, if you're buying investment properties,
26:46 there's a lot of, and by the way,
26:48 there's a million ways to invest in real estate.
26:49 This is the way that we do it.
26:50 This is the way that we teach it 'cause it's the simplest
26:52 and it's the one where you're never gonna get in trouble.
26:54 - 5,000 homes, you know a little something about it.
26:56 - Yeah, this is the safest way to buy real estate.
26:57 I mean, this is like the formula.
26:59 I wish I'd known this, I'd have made a lot more money.
27:01 But basically, what you wanna make sure is
27:05 whenever you're buying that property,
27:07 what was the question again?
27:09 I'm going on another tangent.
27:10 - Do you play with how much you put down?
27:12 - Yeah, you wanna put down at least 20%
27:14 'cause then you don't have the mortgage insurance
27:15 and so it helps your cashflow.
27:17 If you're not putting that down,
27:18 you just found a killer deal.
27:20 But like a lot of people,
27:21 they do these methods of buying where you're like,
27:23 you buy owner occupied 3% down,
27:26 then you move every six months and that's a way to do it.
27:28 And as long as it's still cashflow, I'm for it.
27:30 But in today's market,
27:32 it's not gonna do it. - With affordability rates
27:33 too high, it just doesn't work.
27:35 - Well, that's fascinating 'cause I'm trying to do more
27:37 in real estate myself and the challenge is,
27:41 there is so much information,
27:42 but there's so much information.
27:44 - Yeah, it was from society in general now, right?
27:46 - How do you know what to do?
27:48 - And this is what I say,
27:49 if you had a chance to talk to somebody,
27:51 I mean with Everbolt, for example,
27:53 if you had a chance to talk to somebody
27:54 who's franchised 200, 400 restaurants
27:57 or somebody that's never done it,
27:58 who are you gonna go talk to?
27:59 - Someone who's done 400 restaurants.
28:00 - So the number one thing I tell people
28:01 is you gotta find people that are actually doing it
28:04 and ask them, let me see your houses.
28:05 I wanna see what your houses are doing.
28:07 If they don't have a spreadsheet
28:08 or some kind of software that's showing them exact,
28:10 I mean, I can literally pull up a tab on my Excel.
28:12 You will see every house, what I bought it for,
28:14 what the cashflow is, every single payment.
28:16 If I showed you the amount of detail
28:17 that we put into this thing,
28:19 I'm not even an analytical guy.
28:20 Hell, I don't even like to see that much stuff,
28:22 but my partner Tyler is, and so he does it for me.
28:25 But every single property, I know exactly what the rate is,
28:27 I know how much I'm cashflow,
28:28 I know how much is in the reserves,
28:29 I know when that loan has, all these different things.
28:32 And so it's just right there in front of me.
28:33 But you wanna make sure that whoever you're using
28:35 or helping you is really an expert at it.
28:38 And then you wanna make sure that you can trust them,
28:40 just as a person.
28:41 - Do you only buy in one market or do you scatter?
28:43 - No, we're in multiple.
28:44 We used to just buy Utah
28:45 'cause we got a lot bigger commission checks.
28:48 But we, just being honest, that was easy.
28:50 It was in our backyard, I can go see the houses.
28:52 But once that market dried up for investors,
28:55 we actually studied 92 markets around the country
28:59 and we found the three best markets at that time.
29:02 It's funny because I went on Cody Sperber's show
29:04 at that time and I asked him,
29:05 "Where's the one place you'd buy right now?"
29:07 And he was one of our three markets we identified.
29:08 So it was kind of a validation.
29:10 And then Chris Krohn,
29:11 who does a lot of real estate investment coaching,
29:12 said the same thing.
29:14 And so our numbers were good, but we basically look for,
29:17 and this is part of what are some of the other things
29:19 that go into where you're deciding,
29:20 "Well, right now we only buy in red states."
29:22 I mean, you can get a renter in a blue state
29:24 and you can't get them out for years.
29:25 They don't have to pay you, it can sink you.
29:28 We only buy in markets where people are moving to
29:31 that have strong economies.
29:33 So Florida's a big one for us,
29:34 Arkansas, Tennessee, different areas like that.
29:37 Oklahoma's another one.
29:41 And then again, so we just studied the markets.
29:43 Where do the numbers still work?
29:44 If the numbers work, we'll buy it.
29:46 We just partner with the top agents in those areas
29:49 and we'd run it through our formula,
29:51 check it out, if it works, it works.
29:53 - So when you do out of state,
29:54 does part of your profit have to incorporate
29:57 property management as well?
29:58 - Well, so we don't do anything
29:59 with the property management side.
30:01 We just turn it over to the property managers
30:03 in those areas.
30:03 So we've found the best property,
30:04 'cause in every one of these areas,
30:05 we have hundreds, even thousands of homes
30:07 that we've sold to investors.
30:08 And so we find the best property managers.
30:10 But what we do do is, so we'll find the best agent,
30:13 and then they actually take the commission.
30:15 They just cut us a small referral fee,
30:17 and then we charge a fee up front to work with us.
30:19 So we're still making, that's why I say,
30:21 in Utah, if I sell someone a $300,000 investment property,
30:24 I make nine grand on the commission.
30:26 With these deals, we make about five to six grand per house.
30:29 But we're building, I mean, we have so many clients now
30:33 that are like, wow, these guys didn't try to,
30:36 I saw these realtors selling homes, like I said,
30:38 condos for five, $600,000,
30:39 they were never gonna cash flow.
30:41 They wanted the $18,000 check.
30:43 You know, their commission on it.
30:44 And I couldn't ever, I would feel guilty
30:46 taking the damn thing.
30:47 And so all of our clients are so grateful
30:49 because we protected them, and they know it.
30:51 And so we have thousands of clients now
30:53 that we've worked with, and most of our clients
30:56 end up buying eight, 10, 15 homes.
30:58 - With, through your group? - Through us, yeah.
31:00 - And so do you ever partner with your clients,
31:02 or is it just-- - Yeah, I do, yeah.
31:03 So for me, I wanna buy, one of my goals
31:05 probably at the end of this year,
31:06 Pace Morby came and spoke to my men's group in November
31:08 and challenged us.
31:10 He wanted to, I think, own 100 homes last year,
31:12 and I ended up with 400 properties,
31:14 or doors, whatever it was.
31:15 And so I'm like, okay, I need to be at 100 doors
31:18 by the end of the year.
31:19 And so my only way to get there, my loans are full.
31:21 I've got all those and everything.
31:22 But I partner with people.
31:23 So I do the work, we find the home, we take care of it.
31:27 We split part of the down payment.
31:29 They're obviously doing more 'cause I'm doing all the work.
31:31 And then they do the loan in their name,
31:32 and then we partner together.
31:33 - Oh, cool, that helps. - Yeah, and I've done that
31:35 15 times. - Okay.
31:37 - Yeah. - My last real estate question,
31:38 and then I have to ask you about your undercover work
31:41 because that keeps me very excited.
31:44 But do you own most of your rentals in an LLC,
31:47 a corporation, your personal?
31:48 - Yeah, any of them I partner with someone,
31:49 we set up our own LLC for each one on bank account,
31:52 and we just run it all through there.
31:53 Do a K1 and the whole thing.
31:56 Any of them that I own outside that,
31:58 I have three or four that are in one LLC,
32:01 but all the rest have their own LLC.
32:02 - And you do that just for liability?
32:04 - For liability and just to keep it separate.
32:06 Yeah, it's actually really easy to do.
32:07 Like, once you kind of, if you spend 30 minutes
32:10 looking at it, you can see how easy it is to do,
32:11 talk to your accountant, and you might as well.
32:14 - Yeah, okay.
32:16 So I read the most interesting thing about you
32:19 is your undercover work.
32:20 I need to hear this, I need to understand.
32:22 So you did undercover work to rescue children
32:26 from sex trafficking.
32:27 - Yeah, so I stopped about three years ago,
32:29 so I don't do it anymore, to preface with that.
32:31 But yeah, so I was at a conference,
32:35 I don't know, six, seven years ago,
32:36 and I heard this guy get up, this guy named Paul,
32:38 and he talked about how he'd just gone to Columbia
32:41 and they did this big sting operation
32:43 to rescue these kids that were being sex trafficked.
32:44 And he's telling me this story,
32:46 and there's a million coincidences of this whole story,
32:48 but long story short, he was a real estate mogul.
32:50 He'd helped fund, or sorry, he'd helped build a fund
32:53 that at the time was like a multiple billion dollar fund.
32:56 Now it's like a $30 billion fund, but at the time.
32:59 And so he was like this guy that I'm just like, wow,
33:01 like, he's a real estate guy, he got to go do this,
33:03 I want to go do it.
33:04 And so I went up to him after the event
33:05 and kind of blew me off, you know?
33:07 I just kept doing what I do to get in the room
33:08 when I want to be there.
33:09 And eventually--
33:11 - Pleasantly persistent?
33:12 - Yeah, yeah, well, it's, you know,
33:14 everybody needs something, figure out what it is
33:15 and go give it to them, right?
33:17 So that's kind of what I did,
33:17 and I just made myself an asset.
33:19 Long story short, so there was a company,
33:21 that foundation that had started
33:23 called Operation Underground Railroad.
33:24 It was about six months old at the time.
33:26 They're big now with like Tony Robbins
33:28 and Lewis Howes work with them,
33:29 and amazing organization.
33:30 This guy, Tim, started it.
33:32 And so Paul had basically, he was kind of the guy
33:36 that first funded a lot of their first missions
33:38 that would kind of help get the money for it.
33:40 And so he got me in, I got in with him,
33:42 and he got me to go on this first op.
33:44 And long story short, yeah,
33:46 so we'd go into these foreign countries,
33:48 ones that need help.
33:49 So they ask this organization for help.
33:51 Like, you wouldn't do this in the US.
33:53 They have law enforcement, they have FBI and CIA
33:55 and all the things, right?
33:56 I mean, but in some of these other places we went,
33:58 I mean, it was crazy.
33:59 They had nothing.
34:00 And so we'd go down there,
34:01 and the reason why it worked so well
34:03 is because we are the target for who would go do this,
34:05 Americans going to Colombia or Mexico
34:09 or wherever it was, Ecuador, whatever.
34:13 And so we'd go down there and go to the beach
34:16 and start hustling and talk to the guys.
34:18 And next thing we know, we were pretty good,
34:19 usually at finding whoever the trafficker was.
34:22 And then we'd set up a sting.
34:23 We'd have them bring all the girls.
34:24 And I ended up going on 11 sting operations.
34:29 And in that time, we were able to rescue over 100 girls.
34:32 - Wow.
34:33 - Yeah, my first one was special.
34:34 I got a plaque that Tim gave me
34:35 that has some money's framed,
34:38 a picture of me, him, and one of the federalities
34:39 and shows all the stats of the takedown
34:42 and some of the money we used to rescue those girls.
34:43 And I keep that right on my desk.
34:45 And the reason why is, and you know this,
34:48 I always talk about, people talk about their why.
34:50 And when I was younger,
34:51 I always wanted to save somebody's life.
34:52 That was like a stupid goal I had.
34:54 One was like, go to the moon, own a penguin,
34:56 save someone's life.
34:57 (laughing)
34:57 But like, and so I keep that there
35:00 because sometimes work just sucks.
35:02 Some days are hard.
35:03 Some days you don't know why it's worth it.
35:05 And it's funny that we've talked a lot
35:06 about real estate in this episode
35:07 'cause I don't talk about it as much anymore.
35:08 But when I was going through that in 2008, '09, '10,
35:12 it was so hard to sell houses.
35:13 I was dead ass broke.
35:15 I'd made millions of dollars and lost it.
35:17 It was just, people will never truly understand
35:19 how difficult that was.
35:20 We have a six month supply of homes on the market right now.
35:22 We had a 22 month supply of homes on the market.
35:23 I mean, there was nobody buying homes.
35:25 Everybody was upside down.
35:26 Everybody put nothing down.
35:28 And it was brutal.
35:29 And I had another quote on my wall.
35:32 I had this prospecting booth where I would just go,
35:34 I had it as motivational as I could
35:35 'cause I had to work every day.
35:37 And it said, "Show up today for your future self.
35:39 "You never know who's gonna need you."
35:41 And that was my motivation, man.
35:42 Because in the moment, it wasn't fun.
35:43 You're paying off bills, you're paying off debt.
35:45 And that was it.
35:46 I mean, it was not fun.
35:47 You have to have a bigger reason to go to work.
35:50 And people kind of, they focus too much
35:52 on the immediate thing.
35:53 And so I always was thinking forward of what would happen.
35:56 So to look back now and have a weekend
35:57 like I just had with my men's group here in San Diego,
35:59 you know, life changing for these guys.
36:01 And to be able to go on those ops,
36:02 like I didn't know where my life was going,
36:04 but I'm so proud that like in those times
36:06 when it was so hard, I mean, it was so brutal.
36:08 I was carrying 50 listings at a time
36:10 and I maybe sold one every two to three weeks.
36:12 It was brutal.
36:13 I had to make conversations every day with these owners
36:15 telling them they need to lower their price,
36:17 borrow money, whatever they could to try to sell.
36:19 But I got through it.
36:21 And because of that, I built, you know,
36:23 this life where I'm able to go do things like this now.
36:26 And so when I had a chance to be a part of those ops,
36:29 it was special, man.
36:29 We, yeah, we rescued over 100 kids
36:32 and took down over 30 traffickers
36:34 on the ops I was involved in.
36:35 And, you know, one of them in particular was,
36:38 you know, she was an eighth grade school teacher
36:39 and she used her position
36:40 to get these girls into trafficking.
36:42 And we took her out.
36:43 Like how many dozens or hundreds of girls
36:45 did we save from that one op?
36:46 I don't know, but like, those are the things.
36:48 And so that plaque is front and center.
36:50 'Cause some days life just sucks, man.
36:52 But I'm like, no, Jimmy, you never know.
36:53 I would have never guessed
36:54 that's what I would have been doing.
36:56 I kind of just, the opportunity presented itself
36:57 because of what I did when I was 24, 25, 26,
37:00 'cause I didn't give up,
37:01 'cause I didn't go give up on, you know,
37:03 wanting to be somebody.
37:04 And so, yeah, man, and so it means a lot.
37:06 And it's a part of my story.
37:08 It's one of those things that you're just look back
37:11 and you're like, how did I even end up there?
37:13 But it was beautiful, man.
37:14 - Did you ever get shot at?
37:16 - No, no, no, no.
37:17 I mean, if we were, if it ever got to that point,
37:19 we were in deep shit 'cause we weren't armed ever.
37:21 The only protection we had was the,
37:24 it's actually where "Weird That They" comes from.
37:25 I'll tell you this story,
37:26 the name of my coaching program
37:28 because this is where it came from.
37:29 So we did an op once in Latin America.
37:31 I don't say exactly where, but this,
37:33 we had found the guy that was supposed to be the trafficker.
37:36 And the next morning, and we knew that
37:37 because we were working with two other traffickers.
37:39 And when they heard we were working with this guy,
37:41 they're like, oh, if you're working with him,
37:42 we can't talk to you anymore.
37:44 Like, he's the guy.
37:45 Like, okay, sweet.
37:46 So we knew we found the guy.
37:46 And the next day he's like,
37:48 hey, I want you to meet my boss.
37:49 We're like, I thought you were the boss.
37:50 He's like, no, no, the boss boss.
37:51 So we go meet this dude and they had a perimeter set.
37:54 I mean, a guy had his gun on him.
37:55 I speak Spanish 'cause I served a Mormon mission
37:57 in another life.
37:58 And so I'm the communicator.
38:00 There's four of us.
38:01 We have our doc, our Navy SEAL guy, me and Paul,
38:04 you know, the talkers.
38:05 And I'm talking the whole thing in Spanish,
38:07 negotiating these kids and prices
38:09 and the whole thing for 20 minutes.
38:11 And we got out.
38:12 I mean, if any part of any inkling,
38:14 if any little thought of these guys
38:16 were that we were there undercover, we were dead.
38:18 I mean, we were not in a good place.
38:20 This was, no one would have known about us for months, years.
38:23 And anyway, long story short,
38:25 we ended up going back from that op.
38:27 And I was pretty scared 'cause it was like, wow,
38:29 we gotta go back now and get these guys arrested.
38:31 And we went back and I had told my roommate at the time,
38:33 I did, I think it was my last one.
38:35 And I think it was my third or fourth one at the time.
38:38 And we went back and we did the sting.
38:40 We got these guys taken down
38:43 and we'd rescued the kids and everything.
38:46 And afterwards, I was just like, wow,
38:48 I have to do this for the rest of my life.
38:49 Like this is going to be something that, you know,
38:51 it was so amazing to watch that.
38:52 So on the way home, my girlfriend picked me up from the car
38:55 or in my truck from the airport.
38:57 And it's interesting because you tell people the stories
39:00 and I thought everyone would want to hear about it.
39:01 The truth is they don't.
39:02 It's really hard to talk about.
39:04 I've learned how to tell the story in a way
39:05 that people aren't going to turn this podcast off hopefully.
39:08 But like, you start telling people what's going on
39:09 and they don't want to hear it.
39:10 They'd rather be ignorant to it, to be honest.
39:12 And so like, she was, I'm telling her this story
39:15 and scaring the shit out of her, you know?
39:17 And she pulls over and she goes,
39:18 "Hey, I don't want you to do this anymore.
39:21 This is like super dangerous and bad environment."
39:24 And I was like, "I know, but this is part
39:25 of my life's mission now, you know?
39:26 Like, look what we just did."
39:27 And she goes, "I know, but like,
39:27 why can't they just go do it?"
39:29 And without even thinking, I just said, I said,
39:32 "What do you mean?
39:32 There is no they.
39:33 We are the they."
39:35 And when I said that, I was like, I still get shivers.
39:37 - Yeah, just gave me goosebumps.
39:38 - Yeah, I was like, "Oh shit, that's good."
39:40 And I was like, "That's gonna be the motto for my life.
39:41 We are the they."
39:42 And so that's the whole premise of it is, you know,
39:44 we don't wait for other people to step up.
39:46 Like when something needs to be done or fixed,
39:48 we're the ones that do it.
39:49 And that's the premise.
39:50 That's the whole, how we are the they became a thing.
39:53 - Hey, everybody.
39:54 Looking for great insights?
39:55 Entrepreneur.com's podcast network is the place for you.
39:59 Check out podcasts like Problem Solvers
40:01 and Smart Passive Income for smart advice.
40:04 Hear true stories on how success happens,
40:06 financial updates on dirty money,
40:08 deep dives with behind the review,
40:10 and food trends on restaurant influencers.
40:13 And don't miss my new show.
40:15 It's all at entrepreneur.com/listen.
40:18 Let's start our success journey today.
40:20 Hey there, it's your host, Jeff Fenster,
40:25 and I have something very exciting to share with you today.
40:28 You know, here on the Jeff Fenster Show,
40:30 we're all about growth, both personally and professionally.
40:33 Speaking of growth, have you ever heard of Everbill?
40:36 As the proud founder of Everbill,
40:37 I can tell you firsthand that we're on a mission
40:39 to help everyone unevolve,
40:41 to live actively and eat stuff that's been around forever.
40:45 Imagine stepping back into a world
40:47 where everything you eat is fresh,
40:48 nourishing, and packed with nutrients.
40:51 At Everbill, we've got you covered
40:52 with our wide range of superfood bowls.
40:55 But it's not just about the food.
40:57 It's about a community of like-minded individuals
40:59 who are determined to embrace a vibrant,
41:01 fulfilling lifestyle.
41:03 Join us on this journey as we redefine
41:05 what it means to be healthy and active.
41:07 So if you're ready to unevolve
41:08 and be the best version of yourself,
41:10 head over to everbill.com and check out our menu.
41:15 - And that's a great segue into,
41:17 'cause yesterday I came and got to meet part of your group
41:21 over at Wild Jungle and watch the group of We Are The They
41:25 and get inspired just by the group of men
41:26 that you're putting together and the mission you're after.
41:29 And learn about it, and now I wanna be part of it.
41:32 And it clearly lights you up.
41:33 I mean, when you talk about it,
41:34 I can just see the passion in your eyes.
41:36 - Oh, it's so fun, dude, to be able to do it.
41:38 It's the funnest thing I've ever been involved.
41:40 I don't feel like I ever work,
41:41 and I've never worked more in my life.
41:43 - Well, I mean, it's so valuable because I think,
41:45 and I'm gonna let you tell me so I don't butcher it,
41:47 but a safe place for men, especially in today's world,
41:52 and I think you named the three of them,
41:55 but the one that triggered me was vulnerable.
41:58 It's hard for men to be vulnerable.
41:59 It's hard for men to be in a,
42:01 especially around other men.
42:02 And how are you cultivating that?
42:05 I mean, how is that happening?
42:07 - Yeah, so I mean, we do a whole,
42:08 I mean, when guys sign up for my program,
42:10 we get them all together the first weekend.
42:12 I'll give you a couple of the exercises I did.
42:14 I think you guys can do this with your company,
42:15 your family, whatever.
42:16 This is not proprietary.
42:17 I came up with this,
42:17 but it's just the most beautiful exercise.
42:20 And 'cause I'd been to so many masterminds in advance,
42:23 and people are flexing, and they're trying to,
42:24 what they're really saying is,
42:25 "Hey, please get to know me.
42:26 "I promise I'm worthy to get to know."
42:28 But it comes off as braggadocious and fricking front,
42:31 and all this shit, and I just hated that.
42:33 I remember I went to a networking event
42:35 at Dan Bilzerian's house one time,
42:36 and I got blown off by a few guys,
42:38 and it was like Jordan Belfort was there,
42:41 Jim Quick, all these different people,
42:42 and I just felt like a jackass,
42:43 and I just remember feeling like,
42:44 "God, I hate feeling like this.
42:45 "Why do we gotta be like this?"
42:47 And so I've been to all these events.
42:50 I know what I didn't want.
42:51 And so when I first got the guys together,
42:53 the first night, what I did is I had 'em make a badass list.
42:56 Are you familiar with Jen Gottlieb?
42:57 So she taught me this.
42:59 We were sitting there with me, her, and Prince EA
43:01 at this event that Dan Fleischman had put on,
43:04 and me and Prince were talking about how,
43:06 "Yeah, you get this imposter syndrome.
43:07 "We're just guys.
43:08 "Am I really doing anything?"
43:12 And Jen was like, "Guys, I have the best exercise
43:14 "to help you get out of imposter syndrome."
43:17 And so what she said, she's write down a list
43:19 of everything that makes you badass
43:21 from the time you were a kid.
43:22 Like, this is your chance to brag.
43:24 And I'd had a guy about six weeks before I met her on this.
43:28 He was at a house party of mine,
43:29 and we were laying there, and he was just,
43:31 just talking himself down.
43:34 And so I said, "Bro, this is the safest room
43:36 "you're ever gonna be in.
43:36 "For the next five minutes,
43:37 "you're gonna brag your ass off.
43:38 "Everything you can possibly come up with."
43:40 And I saw him light up as he's telling us.
43:42 He's letting me know all of it.
43:44 Anything that you ever have wanted someone to know about you
43:46 that you just feel like you'd be bragging if you told him.
43:48 And he lit up.
43:49 And so I kinda took her badass list.
43:50 I have the guys write it out.
43:52 And then the key to it, she says is,
43:54 "Then you're gonna have somebody read it to you,
43:55 "or you read it as if you're reading it
43:56 "about somebody else."
43:58 And all of a sudden, you listen to it,
43:58 and you're like, "Yeah, this guy's kind of a badass."
44:00 I remember when I read mine, I'm like,
44:01 "Shit, I'm gonna hang out with this guy."
44:03 And then I had them all get in a circle.
44:05 So little pods of 10.
44:07 And one guy gets in the middle, and he reads his list.
44:09 And then the guys go crazy celebrating him,
44:11 like they just won the Super Bowl.
44:13 This is the first night we're all together.
44:15 So every guy is celebrating.
44:16 And then they all get, I get emotional thinking about it,
44:18 'cause it's like you watch them change their lives.
44:20 But they get in this big circle,
44:22 and then every guy has an accountability partner.
44:23 And they get up, and they have to tell
44:25 what makes their accountability partner a badass.
44:27 By the end of the night, everybody is like,
44:28 "I feel seen.
44:29 "I don't have to front.
44:30 "I don't have to prove myself.
44:32 "These guys know I'm amazing."
44:34 And it just, it changed that whole energy.
44:35 And then the next day, they'll do one other exercise.
44:38 They get 'em in a big circle.
44:39 I have a list of about 40 questions.
44:41 And I learned this one going,
44:42 there's a lady named Catherine Hoke.
44:43 We went to the Pelican Bay Prison one time.
44:45 Entrepreneurs, you teach these,
44:47 she doesn't like using the word film.
44:49 I can't think of the right word, but the criminals.
44:52 And these are dudes that are in there for murder, lifers,
44:56 I mean, solitary confinement guys, the whole bit.
44:58 And we get in a line across from each other.
45:00 And she calls it Step to the Line.
45:02 And basically, she'll say stuff like,
45:03 "If you had a parent tuck you in at night,
45:05 "step to the line."
45:06 And you watch all the entrepreneurs, almost every time,
45:09 all of 'em step forward.
45:10 Not one of the hundred guys that are in prison.
45:14 And then all of a sudden, she asks other questions.
45:15 "If you watched a sibling get killed
45:16 "by your 20th birthday, step to the line."
45:18 Half the prisoners.
45:19 And it's just crazy.
45:19 I mean, it's just like this.
45:20 So I took kind of that-- - It brings you to tears.
45:21 - Yes, and it was just a life-changing moment for me
45:24 when I went and did it.
45:24 And that's kind of why I love to do experiences.
45:26 You don't know which moment's gonna change your life.
45:29 And so I took that, and I kind of put my own spin on it.
45:32 So I got all the guys in a circle.
45:33 I had a list of 40 questions.
45:35 And if I, if it, but by the way, first,
45:39 I went and I told a very vulnerable story.
45:41 And I talked about all the shit
45:43 that wasn't so sexy about me, right?
45:45 And I talked about how I had to work through these things
45:47 and things I was still working through.
45:48 Then I had one of my best buddies,
45:49 who's also an influencer, do the same thing.
45:51 So by the time we got to the circle,
45:54 the guys were primed.
45:55 And then I had the questions.
45:57 So I started out with like,
45:58 "If your parents ever divorced, step in the circle."
46:01 Half the guys step in, step back out.
46:03 Then I'll say something like,
46:03 "If you've ever had a sibling die,
46:05 step in the circle, one or two people.
46:07 If you ever had cancer, one or two people."
46:09 Then I start getting a little bit more personal.
46:10 If you've ever been cheated on, step in the circle.
46:13 If you've ever cheated on your spouse or girlfriend,
46:14 step in the circle.
46:15 You know, if you have a pornography addiction
46:18 or have in the last six months, step in the circle.
46:21 We start getting very vulnerable.
46:22 And all of a sudden, every guy's in tears
46:24 because the problem with men is we feel like we're alone.
46:26 We don't have these safe places,
46:28 these containers where we can go to actually learn that,
46:30 like, "Wow, I'm not the only asshole going through this."
46:32 But in that moment, every single guy,
46:35 and so then we give them an opportunity
46:36 once this activity's done.
46:38 And one of the questions I ask is,
46:39 "Do you feel lonely often?"
46:40 I think 38 of the 40, or 48 of the 50 guys
46:43 stepped in the circle.
46:44 It's just a crazy thing.
46:45 And guys get up and they start talking about,
46:46 "Hey, I just found my wife cheating on me.
46:48 Hey, you know, I have had a pornography addiction
46:51 since I was 12, I've never told a soul.
46:53 And these guys, and they just work through
46:57 all these different things, whatever it might be, right?
46:59 Or, you know, "I've been cheating on my girlfriend.
47:01 I don't know why I do this," you know?
47:03 Whatever it might be, and that's the,
47:05 really sets the whole foundation for the whole thing.
47:07 And then the next day, there's this giant rope swing.
47:08 If you go to my Instagram, MrJimmyRex, you can see it.
47:11 We do that, we jump off this cliff.
47:13 It's 280 feet down.
47:15 My buddies literally go set it up the day before.
47:17 It's a rope swing.
47:17 It's like, this isn't like you pay money to go do it.
47:19 Like, it's not there one day, it's there the next.
47:22 And I have them leave behind the limiting belief,
47:24 negative relationship, or bad thought
47:25 that they've been holding onto,
47:27 and leap into an empowering one.
47:28 So they come up out of that canyon a new person,
47:31 and that's the first weekend we're ever together.
47:33 And then it's a two and a half year program
47:35 where we just keep going and driving.
47:36 So that's my, yeah, I remember the original question,
47:40 but that's what we do with help men get vulnerable
47:43 and go through that.
47:44 - I mean, it's something I think all men
47:45 should at least explore, if it's a way for us
47:47 to get vulnerable and be around other men
47:48 and have the freedom and approval, permission,
47:53 to get real with each other.
47:54 - Yeah, you don't have to have your shit together.
47:56 It's like, no one cares where you've been.
47:57 No one cares what you've done.
47:58 It's like, let's all go together here.
48:00 But you feel seen for the first time.
48:02 You feel loved for the first time.
48:03 Every man carries these weights,
48:04 and they don't, it's like, set it down, dude.
48:07 Let's go.
48:08 - So my last question before we wrap up is your new book.
48:11 - You End Up Where You're Heading.
48:14 - You End Up Where You're Heading.
48:15 I was gonna say, You're Going Where You're Heading.
48:16 You End Up Where You're Heading.
48:18 Tell me.
48:19 - Yeah, the subtitle of it is
48:20 The Hidden Dangers of Living a Safe Life.
48:22 And the whole premise is so many people on their deathbeds,
48:24 nobody regrets the decisions they made.
48:26 I mean, you got a girl pregnant in high school,
48:28 you love that little kid more than anything
48:29 you've ever done.
48:30 Like, you screwed up a business,
48:31 the lessons you learned are invaluable, right?
48:33 Like, most things you tried or didn't,
48:35 like, you don't have regrets.
48:36 But people really regret the things they didn't do.
48:39 It's the conversation they never had to forgive somebody.
48:42 It's the person they always had a crush on
48:44 and never let 'em know, you know?
48:46 It's like, the girl that got away or whatever it might be.
48:47 Or the business idea that just died in your head.
48:49 And so, the whole premise of what I wanted to do
48:52 with the book is I take people through
48:53 Joseph Campbell's hero's journey,
48:55 and it just shows 'em the steps
48:57 of how to be the hero of your own story.
48:59 And how to really take control,
49:00 live your life by design, and go after it.
49:02 So, the whole book, I use examples from my life
49:05 with the 10 different stages,
49:06 and then different people that have been in my life
49:08 that I've learned from.
49:09 And we walk people through how they can do that.
49:12 - I have to get it.
49:14 I'm gonna get it.
49:15 I'm gonna read it so the next time we talk,
49:17 I'm gonna be familiar.
49:19 Because, Jimmy, honestly, like I said from the beginning,
49:21 I was so excited to have you on my show
49:22 just 'cause not only are you the most interesting man
49:25 as a reputation, but just knowing you and watching you,
49:28 your thirst for life, your ability to cut through the crap
49:31 and get it there.
49:31 So, those listening who don't follow you
49:33 need to go follow you.
49:34 If you're a man out there and you're interested
49:36 in improving your life, being the best version of yourself,
49:38 I recommend you check out the We Are The They program.
49:40 I got a little taste yesterday.
49:42 And I hope I get the opportunity to spend more time
49:44 with you and your group because you're changing lives,
49:46 you're changing the world.
49:47 And thank you, man.
49:49 Thank you for coming on and spending this time with us.
49:51 - Thanks, man.
49:51 No, we'd love to have you.
49:52 And yeah, it's been so fun.
49:53 It's so cool 'cause all these,
49:55 I worked so hard to build some of these
49:56 really special relationships.
49:58 And you have a day like yesterday to have you there
50:01 and have Steve there and Tarzan and Dan, all these guys
50:03 that I worked so hard to build a real connection with.
50:05 And not one guy I had to pay.
50:07 They just love what we're doing and they step up.
50:09 And so, we'd love to have you.
50:11 Super involved, man.
50:12 It's awesome.
50:13 - Thank you.
50:14 - Yeah, it's fun.
50:14 - Dude, thank you.
50:15 Thank you.
50:16 - You bet, man.
50:17 Thank you so much for listening.
50:20 If you're looking to level up
50:21 your relationship capital game,
50:22 then take a minute and text the word JEFF
50:25 to 33777 for a free copy of my
50:28 Network to Millions playbook.
50:31 The link will also be provided in the show notes below.
50:33 See you guys next time.
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