Into The Thunderverse
If you want to make your own CBW-inspired wrestling RPG, check out World Wide Wrestling by Nathan D Paoletta: https://ndpdesign.com/wwwrpg
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#partsfunknown #wrestling #roleplayinggame
If you want to make your own CBW-inspired wrestling RPG, check out World Wide Wrestling by Nathan D Paoletta: https://ndpdesign.com/wwwrpg
SUBSCRIBE TO partsFUNknown: https://bit.ly/2J2Hl6q
TWITTER: https://twitter.com/partsfunknown
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/partsfunknown/
#partsfunknown #wrestling #roleplayinggame
Category
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FunTranscript
00:00:00 Hello, I'm Adam Hailing from partsFUNknown. It's all coming to an end.
00:00:05 This is part one of our season finale of the No Rolls Barred one-shots, our QCU.
00:00:12 It's all coming to an end. We didn't intend for it all to kind of interlock together,
00:00:16 but we're obsessed with comics and making stuff matter. So here we are, season finale.
00:00:21 As ever, if you're interested in the system, check out Worldwide Wrestling Designed by Nathan D. Power.
00:00:26 I left a link in the description below, but for now, we're gonna drop you right into it.
00:00:29 It's all coming to an end. There's a crisis between worlds.
00:00:35 Hello and welcome to CBW, where the big boys are back with a vengeance.
00:00:41 I'm Tom, head of time and space here at CBW, and these are our players.
00:00:48 Hi, my name's Lolo.
00:00:50 Hello, my name is Luke.
00:00:52 Hello, my name is Adam.
00:00:54 Hi, my name's Laurie.
00:00:56 Hi, my name's Ollie, but you might know me better as the High Flyer, Rick Thunder.
00:01:05 [LAUGHTER]
00:01:07 Right. Let's do a fight.
00:01:11 It's slightly wonky glasses.
00:01:13 The time, the 1990s.
00:01:16 The place, an aircraft hangar at Naval Air Station Miramax in California.
00:01:23 The country is in the grip of a fear perpetrated by the mysterious and evil mastermind, Red Scare.
00:01:31 Only two men have shown the courage and skill needed to combat this menace.
00:01:36 Ace fighter pilot, Rick Thunder, and his loyal wingman, Tim Quick.
00:01:41 Today, after weeks of ominous silence, Red Scare has struck again,
00:01:46 and the trail of destruction leads all the way to the Bermuda Triangle.
00:01:51 With no time to lose, Rick Thunder prepares his Danger Zone jet
00:01:55 for what might just be the most important flight of his life.
00:02:02 I love you, Danger Zone, you reliable, completely inanimate jet.
00:02:06 We're going to have some good adventures together, and let's stick it to those Reds.
00:02:11 You feel a warm pat on your back from the boyishly good-looking, blonde-haired wingman, Tim Quick.
00:02:17 You tell 'em, Rick. Sometimes I think you and that jet are better friends than you and me.
00:02:21 Never. You're definitely my best friend. This is just an inanimate jet right now.
00:02:26 You are a person of flesh and bone that will never betray me. You're so loyal, Tim Quick.
00:02:32 Rick, I promise I will be with you till your dying day.
00:02:37 That is... that's such a nice thing to say, with no ulterior motives.
00:02:42 What can I say? I'm a nice guy. And with that, you hear the clack clack clack of healed feet
00:02:48 as a young, blonde woman runs into the hangar.
00:02:53 This is a classic small-town American beauty.
00:02:56 She has long, luscious blonde hair and a freckly face, but the best thing about her is her smile.
00:03:03 It's your season one love interest, Julie Lovely.
00:03:07 Rick, Rick, oh, Rick, please, please don't go. It's... it's so... it's so dangerous.
00:03:12 Red Scare has caused so much damage and panic and fear all across the country.
00:03:19 I know you're... I know you're the best fighter pilot maybe in the world, but please, please for me, just stay this once.
00:03:27 Julie Lovely, season one love interest. Because I love you so much, that's why I have to go out there
00:03:33 and finally defeat Red Scare and get rid of this scourge from 1990s America.
00:03:40 Rick, Tim is... Tim is an excellent pilot. He's flown so many solar missions to resounding success.
00:03:47 I mean, look at him. He's fantastic. You sure...
00:03:51 Rick, I'm not sure if I can keep doing this.
00:03:56 The... the fast life you want to live?
00:04:02 I think maybe it's a little too fast for me.
00:04:05 But I've got to go fast. I've got to go fast to protect you, Julie.
00:04:11 Rick, Rick.
00:04:26 But I've got to go. You're... you're going to slow me down.
00:04:33 Rick, I really, really wish I didn't have to say this. I've been tossing and turning all night.
00:04:43 I need you to stay here with me. It's either me or it's that jet.
00:04:53 But if I choose you, everyone might be in danger.
00:04:59 But at least if I choose Danger Zone, the jet, I can stop some of that danger happening.
00:05:07 I'm sorry, Julie, but you're going to have to eat alone tonight.
00:05:14 Fine, fine. I meant what I said.
00:05:23 Richard Thunder, I never want to see you again.
00:05:29 And she turns and she runs.
00:05:32 No time for that lovey-dovey stuff. Come on, Rick, get in the cockpit.
00:05:37 Let's go take care of that brilliant bastard Red Scare once and for all.
00:05:42 I'm doing this for you, Julie. You might not know it now, but I'm doing it for you and our future family together.
00:05:50 Sure, let's go.
00:05:53 Tim leaps into the cockpit of his F-16 Tomcat and guns up the engine.
00:06:02 As you do the same, as the engines kick in and these two magnificent ghost-grey fighter jets rocket out of the hangar and up into the sky.
00:06:11 To an uncertain future.
00:06:13 Welcome, everyone, to CBW and welcome to this climactic night of Worlds Collide.
00:06:20 Prepare yourselves as these interdimensional duelists clash inside and outside the ropes in the name of revenge, reclamation and retribution.
00:06:33 [Cheering]
00:06:42 We shoot forward now mere minutes, but in fact, years and years and years to the year 3000, a futuristic city unpopulated by people.
00:06:58 Every man, woman and child is inside behind a screen working to keep the machines of industry running and interacting with the world through digital devices alone.
00:07:07 But in the skies above the city, a purple glow shimmers and sparks and erupting from this rift in space time, an F-16 Tomcat that moments ago was hundreds of metres above the Bermuda Triangle,
00:07:24 now rockets into this futuristic cityscape and skids to a crazy halt atop a large open-top skyscraper.
00:07:33 Where's this? We were just over the Bermuda Triangle just now, it was just sea everywhere, but now it's just cityscape and mechs.
00:07:43 Beep boop, beep beep boop, beep boop.
00:07:47 Yeah, I think we have somehow been hurtled through time to the year 3000 via some interdimensional portal above the Bermuda Triangle. Wait a second.
00:07:58 How are you talking, Danger Zone? You were just in an animate jet minutes ago.
00:08:04 Beep boop boop, beep beep boop, beep boop boop boop boop.
00:08:07 You somehow gained consciousness through the time portal?
00:08:11 The cockpit of this F-16 flips open and your ejector seat launches you out just a few metres into the air before you land gently, if a little shakily, on the roof of this building.
00:08:24 Beep boop boop, beep. A few more sounds come from the jet and then you see the form of this jet start to shift slightly as its thrusters morph into the shape of legs and two arms stretched out from behind its wings.
00:08:37 The cockpit folds down over its chest to reveal a sort of robot-esque face sitting above where shoulders would lie. Beep boop boop, beep boop boop boop, beep.
00:08:46 You're a mech now. I mean, I was really scared a second ago, and I still am because I am a thousand years from where I need to be.
00:08:55 But knowing that you're here with me, maybe I can get through this. And maybe I can find a way back home.
00:09:05 And then Danger Zone reaches out a robotic fist in front of you to fist bump.
00:09:14 And just like that, your mind is back in the present day as you sit on the ground in front of the empty carcass of Danger Zone in the erupted storage space of Cruel Bataña Wrestling,
00:09:27 just a few moments after the question collector disappeared, having drained every last jot of time energy and therefore every last jot of time force from the body of Danger Zone.
00:09:38 The rain pours heavily on Danger Zone's metallic shell and you are truly a man alone in time.
00:09:47 And I just found this bottle of whiskey here, if it was so close to when that happened. I've been drowning my sorrows already.
00:09:57 Danger Zone's gone, and I was tricked by the question collector. I need to find a way to get him back.
00:10:08 The black box, that's where his mind would have been stored. Maybe if I can find the man who did this again with the black box, he can restore my best friend Danger Zone.
00:10:19 And with that thought light bulb pinging above your handsome head, we now travel to somewhere else in the city of London, to a room in a fancy townhouse in Chiswick.
00:10:37 We find ourselves in a basement room in a fancy townhouse in Chiswick, where wealthy wax magnate Desmond de Composé is leaning over a large bubbling cauldron of wax.
00:10:53 On the shelves and workspaces by him are precise artisans tools, scalpels, some calipers, some very fine, minute sculpting tools.
00:11:07 And there are calipers and conical flasks, speakers, bunsen burners burning. Desmond is hard at work over this big, thick, bubbling cauldron and there is a knock on the door.
00:11:19 "Hello, can you please tell us who steps inside?"
00:11:23 "A very right to do, youngish woman, I can't remember if she was youngish or not, we'll lean into it. And yeah, she's got brown hair and very, very posh and lovely and she knocks on the door and she says, 'Hello dear'."
00:11:39 "Not even turning around to look at you, you hear his cold voice simply say the words, 'I'm working darling'."
00:11:47 "But I thought you might like to know I redecorated the entire house because I was bored."
00:11:52 "I'm working darling."
00:11:58 "Oh, come on, why don't you come up and have a look, we'll have a little bit of time together."
00:12:02 He turns around now, quick as a flash, like eyes flashing with rage at this point. "I said I am working darling, what did we agree about my laboratory? What did we say? The one rule about my lab."
00:12:21 "Don't redecorate it even if I really..."
00:12:23 "Never come in my lab, damn it!"
00:12:27 "Now leave me darling to my work." And he turns back to his cauldron and starts to lean in with some tools, scooping out bits of molten wax onto little tile surfaces.
00:12:39 "I go to turn and leave, but I hear a little voice, a little squiggly, scraggly voice in the back of my head that says, 'It would be so easy.' And it would, it would be so easy."
00:13:02 As that voice enters your head, you see Desmond lean just a little bit further in, just to get at the really good wax.
00:13:16 "I go to think that I want to push him in, I just want to push him in, that's all I want to do. It's kind of simple and easy, but the voice tells me to grab the pipes that he uses to manoeuvre the wax, jam it into his system and fill him with wax, so he can be as stiff and as boring forever."
00:13:43 Well, that is 100% a real roll.
00:13:50 "Oh, I hate real on this character. All my other characters are like, plus a million."
00:13:57 "Umm, five."
00:14:01 So you have the option of using your addict roll, but bear in mind the way this works is, once you make your first re-roll on addict, after that roll is over, your real stat is permanently reduced by one and all subsequent rolls must still be made on real.
00:14:16 You do have an infinite number of subsequent re-rolls for different occasions, but each one will reduce your real stat more and more, so you can let it stand, or you can sacrifice something to roll again.
00:14:27 "Do it, do it, do it."
00:14:34 "I can't do it this early on in the episode."
00:14:37 "Do it, do it, do it."
00:14:40 "Listen to the other voices, do you know what I mean?"
00:14:42 "It would be so easy."
00:14:44 "Can I just sacrifice something small and get like half a point knocked off?"
00:14:48 "That is not how it works."
00:14:50 "Like a fingernail, or a tooth?"
00:14:53 If the sacrifice isn't big enough, then the power won't come.
00:14:57 "Okay, fine, I'm gonna let this one ride, do it."
00:15:00 Okay, as you lunge towards him with these pipes, he hears the sound of your footsteps, your expensive heeled shoes on the floor of the workshop, and spins before you even reach him.
00:15:11 Just in enough time to sort of grab at the pipes himself, and the two of you are now locked in a death grip on these wax-manoeuvring bits of metal.
00:15:21 "This is a well-known bit."
00:15:23 "If you won't get out of my lab, then get out of my life."
00:15:27 And starts to manoeuvre you towards the wax cauldron. What are you doing?
00:15:32 "Oh, I'm gonna go for a real classic move. I'm gonna let him overpower me just enough so that I can pull out of the way and he can fall in."
00:15:42 That's a work role, that kind of tricky manoeuvring is work.
00:15:45 "You know what? On this character, work isn't shit, so that's fine."
00:15:51 "TEN!"
00:15:53 Ten, that'll do it. Please tell us how you finally do away with your husband.
00:15:58 "Well, he is coming towards me and his eyes are filled with anger, but he's also still boring at the same time. I don't understand, it is ridiculous, and I just kind of see his wrists and I hear that voice being like, 'it would be so easy'."
00:16:13 "And I'm like, 'it would!' And in a giggle, I just let it fall, but at the last moment, turn slightly to my left and he just goes headfirst into the cauldron."
00:16:24 Before he even has a second to scream, his cries of pain are muffled by molten wax.
00:16:30 And the most boring, inconsiderate man in the world is submerged in the material that he has devoted his life to by the woman he has failed to devote his life to.
00:16:45 And he is gone beneath the bubbles, solidified forever in wax.
00:16:50 It's a really big cauldron. I don't even know how we got it in the basement.
00:16:54 And as soon as the bubbles come down, there is a knock on the door, a knock which causes the ajar door to swing fully open and you see the tall, lurch-like figure of your man, servant, Paranorman.
00:17:05 "Oh, I see you've murdered the master."
00:17:11 Always so observational. I love you. I love you, Paranorman. You're so wonderful. How are you, dear?
00:17:17 "I live to serve."
00:17:20 That's my favourite thing to hear.
00:17:22 And in keeping with my professional service, there is a man at the door here seeking your professional services.
00:17:31 Someone who needs a medium so he can contact the spirit of his best friend.
00:17:41 Wonderful. Get the tea. We'll have a lovely time. I'm so excited.
00:17:45 I will send him straight to the seance room.
00:17:47 Thank you.
00:17:49 Okay. He makes his way back downstairs and greets you once again, Rick Thunder, in the lobby of Demonique's house and starts to lead you down a series of opulently decorated hallways and past some opulently decorated rooms to Demonique's seance room.
00:18:06 Demonique, can we have a very quick description of what your seance room looks like?
00:18:09 Red. Just red. It's red and plush.
00:18:14 I want sheepskin on the floor. I want it to be a bad porn film kind of red.
00:18:20 Everything's red. I don't understand why. I was just in a very red mood. I think it was just before I killed my husband.
00:18:26 So everything just in a very blood play. Do you know what? Yeah, and lots of vases and fresh flowers. It smells delicious.
00:18:35 Okay.
00:18:37 I don't like red. I don't like red.
00:18:41 I don't like red.
00:18:44 So...
00:18:46 How much fun!
00:18:49 Really, sir, sometimes you have to learn to red the room. Any closer to the door behind you at least.
00:18:55 Yeah, it's good.
00:18:57 And you are alone with Demonique in the seance room. Demonique is sitting at one side of the table. There is an empty seat waiting for you on the other side.
00:19:06 Thank you so much for meeting with me. I hear you're really good at talking to people who have passed.
00:19:12 My best friend who was a jet, who became sentient, there's a lot of time travel stuff.
00:19:17 I'm just a bit overwhelmed right now. He literally just died in front of me after a big massive fight thing.
00:19:22 And I've got his mother box here. It's like a black box. I think it's got his personality.
00:19:26 I need to talk to him. I need to connect to him somehow to find out where he is. Can you help me?
00:19:31 Okay, okay. Try the tea.
00:19:34 Okay.
00:19:36 [SCREAMS]
00:19:38 Get it out. This is horrible tea!
00:19:41 It's only red leaf tea.
00:19:44 Oh, damn it.
00:19:47 Try the cake. Try the cake. It's red velvet.
00:19:53 Good red wine and blue tea. Just red alone.
00:19:58 Okay. And with that, with that tea faux pas past, the two of you settle down to the business of a sense.
00:20:07 Are you red ready?
00:20:11 As ready as, yeah, I'm good to go.
00:20:15 Okay, good. Take a nice deep breath in.
00:20:19 Breathe out.
00:20:22 Breathe in.
00:20:24 Hold.
00:20:30 And breathe out.
00:20:34 Now, your friend, you say they aren't human? Are they a machine?
00:20:41 Hell, hell, Dominique. I don't know. He's the most human person I've ever met.
00:20:47 But yeah, he is a mechanical jet.
00:20:54 All right. Demonic, but that's fine.
00:20:57 Sorry.
00:20:59 So, I've never contacted the spirit of a machine before.
00:21:05 But we'll give it a go.
00:21:07 So, I want you to imagine your friend in your mind.
00:21:11 Take a nice, wonderful, warm feeling.
00:21:15 And now I want you to picture him dying before your very eyes.
00:21:20 Wonderful.
00:21:26 Okay, Lo, can you make a look roll for me, please, to see how successful you are?
00:21:30 Look, so that is eight.
00:21:33 Beautiful.
00:21:37 All of a sudden, the glaring red color of this room just fades from sight.
00:21:41 And it's just the two of you in a table in an infinite void of blackness.
00:21:45 And the little black box sitting in the center of the table as the focal point starts to glimmer ever so faintly with a slight purple hue.
00:21:54 And then suddenly, whoosh, both of your minds are transported through time and space into another kind of void.
00:22:01 Which seems to be everywhere and nowhere at once.
00:22:04 And in the center of that void is a figure, tall, well-muscled, well-bred, in a green suit, leaning on a question-marked staff, a pair of shimmering spectacles atop his nose.
00:22:15 And his whole body is pulsating with that orange, that purple plasmid energy.
00:22:23 Which you have seen shimmering around Danger Zone time and time again.
00:22:28 And in the briefest moment, those eyes seem to be looking straight at you.
00:22:32 And then the vision ends.
00:22:34 And you're back in the red room again, as red as it ever was.
00:22:37 That must be the guy who's got Danger Zone!
00:22:40 Who is it?
00:22:42 Don't know.
00:22:43 Good work. Strong work, Rick.
00:22:46 God.
00:22:48 Well, how do we get to him?
00:22:50 Well, I mean, have I still got the time travel device that I got from the high school place?
00:22:58 You do. It is probably right now at the wreckage of the hot air balloon, but it's an easy enough place to get to.
00:23:04 Can we go back there, Demonique? Could you join me and help me?
00:23:08 If I need to contact that person again to find out where Danger Zone is?
00:23:12 On one condition.
00:23:15 You get my name right.
00:23:17 Demonique.
00:23:19 Oh my God. Demonique.
00:23:22 Denise.
00:23:23 It's your best friend.
00:23:25 I'll settle for Dee Dee.
00:23:27 We're saying the same thing. I can't.
00:23:29 Okay, right. Rick, let's go.
00:23:32 ParaNorman, pack me a lunch.
00:23:34 And let's find my best friend.
00:23:36 Oh God, I'm a weird Y. Am I doing this?
00:23:38 I feel like already there's a little voice going, "It would be so easy."
00:23:41 [Laughter]
00:23:45 So the two of you arrive at the broken wicker and punctured balloon at the dirigible that you were flying only a day ago up into the skies of London.
00:23:56 So, Dee Dee, I've got the black box which has Danger Zone's sentience in.
00:24:02 Hopefully we can revive that.
00:24:04 I've got the time travel device that hopefully we can use to jump between a few dimensions to get him back.
00:24:10 But those places I've been, those people I've seen, they're powerful.
00:24:15 And I'm a mere human.
00:24:17 So I need to construct my own suit from the wreckage of my best friend.
00:24:23 [Laughter]
00:24:25 [Humming]
00:24:36 Am I just at a wreckage watching a man get chased?
00:24:39 Oh, good God.
00:24:41 Ah, yes.
00:24:43 It's lovely, dear.
00:24:44 When you've got to make a Halloween costume at the last minute, you've got a tinfoil.
00:24:48 Oh, that's good audio. That's going to be wonderful audio.
00:24:51 Oh, I'm just going to love that on the microphone.
00:24:53 Crankle Thunder.
00:24:56 [Laughter]
00:24:58 And with Rick Thunder now wearing the repurposed corpse of his best friend.
00:25:04 [Laughter]
00:25:06 You hit the button on the interdimensional device and shimmer into space and time itself.
00:25:16 It is high noon.
00:25:21 Yeehaw!
00:25:23 In a little sheep town just, oh, some two, three miles out from the town of Grappler's Gulch.
00:25:32 The sun burns high in the sky, the tumbleweed blows across the street.
00:25:38 The stores are quiet, the sheep are sleeping.
00:25:42 No one here has a worry in the world.
00:25:45 No one here notices the gang of no-good hoodlums who are gathering outside the United Bullion Bank.
00:25:54 Luke, please can you describe the bunch of no-good, some bitches who are waiting here?
00:26:01 What you see is the most feared man in all of Colorado.
00:26:07 Mad Dog McCree and his gang of shit-kickers.
00:26:14 We're here for Rob Bank.
00:26:19 Can you please tell us your gang and who they are?
00:26:22 Of course I can.
00:26:24 Everyone knows the fearsome shit-kickers around these airports.
00:26:29 No teeth, Terry. No ears, Earl. No nose, Noel. No arms, Andy.
00:26:37 And just fine, Justin. Although, who knows how long he'll be just fine.
00:26:43 If you catch my drift, I like to kill people.
00:26:46 [Laughter]
00:26:48 I can't even remember my husband. Good work.
00:26:50 I have it written down here on my second monitor.
00:26:54 [Laughter]
00:26:59 Okay. It is mere minutes away from five past high noon.
00:27:05 The agreed upon time by you and your gang.
00:27:07 Going to rob this bank.
00:27:09 What are the last words you say to...
00:27:11 What is this sort of rousing gang leader speech or words you're going to say to your gang
00:27:15 before you do the job you came here to do?
00:27:18 Say no teeth, Terry, over there.
00:27:21 Don't fuck it up, or you'll be just like him.
00:27:25 Suddenly there is a burst of purple and blue energy and...
00:27:30 What in tarnation?
00:27:32 The sand is launched up into the air, blinding you temporarily.
00:27:36 As it settles, you find yourself looking at three members of your gang,
00:27:40 sort of scrabbling for their revolvers, looking around,
00:27:43 spitting at everything they can find.
00:27:46 However, two seem to have been flattened by the arrival of two unexpected visitors.
00:27:51 A handsome man in a really quite macabre metal suit
00:28:00 and a well-to-do lady evidently of excellent breeding.
00:28:05 First, Mad Dog, which two members of your gang have been KO'd by the sudden arrival and who's left?
00:28:11 No Arms Andy got taken out and No Nose Noel, unfortunately, got taken out of the group.
00:28:18 I'm not Noel.
00:28:19 I know, I liked Noel. He was a good one as well.
00:28:24 Rick and Demonique, you have arrived suddenly in a cloud of sand in the Old West.
00:28:33 Danger Zone!
00:28:34 Ah, damn it.
00:28:35 Look at Noel!
00:28:37 Worth a go.
00:28:38 I've landed on someone.
00:28:41 Well, maybe if you'd tried it a bit more gracefully, you wouldn't have been such a shit-heap.
00:28:44 Hello, my name's Demonique. What's yours, dear?
00:28:48 I don't think that's much of your business, Randi.
00:28:50 Everyone knows who I am.
00:28:52 Well, I don't.
00:28:53 Which is kind of a double negative.
00:28:54 Yes, so if you wouldn't mind, what's your name, dear?
00:28:58 Name's Mad Dog.
00:29:00 Oh, lovely. Like a pooch.
00:29:01 Mad Dog McCree. No, not like a pooch.
00:29:04 But who the fuck might you be?
00:29:10 What's this here?
00:29:12 Saw this dust and all this purple nonsense and this strange man and his seemingly metal corpse around his body there.
00:29:23 Well, I'm Demonique.
00:29:24 I'm a very, very well-to-do, awesome, established socialite and a medium.
00:29:29 I know, quite impressive.
00:29:30 And this man dressed in a trash bin is Rick.
00:29:37 I'm Rick Thunder. This is Daria.
00:29:41 We're here to save my friend.
00:29:47 We know each other. You look a lot like that earwig lady. I once knew her.
00:29:51 Oh, earwigs. Lovely. No, no, no, no, sadly. It's all my actual natural hair.
00:29:56 One of your gang pipes up and says, "Boss, it's full past high noon. What are we going to do? This is our one and only chance to get this gold. We're down two men."
00:30:09 You're absolutely right, Justin. I've been distracted here by this very, very handsome man and this odd-looking lady over here.
00:30:18 But we got banks to rob, so if you don't mind, quietly fuck off. We're busy.
00:30:25 I was going to say, you're two people down.
00:30:28 Hey, hey, hey, Daria, Daria, what's sidebar for a moment? I think I've seen this guy before.
00:30:33 He's a bit, he's, he's aggressive, but he gets the job done.
00:30:39 I think he might be a good person to have on our side.
00:30:43 Wonderful. We'll keep an eye on him. So maybe we can convince him to join our gang, get back danger zone.
00:30:51 Wonderful. Well, how are we going to convince him, dear?
00:30:55 Idea that just popped into my head. Nothing that you said.
00:30:58 Nothing that I've said at all.
00:30:59 We could volunteer to be the people in his gang.
00:31:02 Oh, shit the bed. That sounds like a wonderful idea.
00:31:07 So what say, pretty boy? You want to go get some gold? Want to be a man? You want to join the shit kickers?
00:31:16 Yes. Let's help him.
00:31:20 Okay. It's your gang. It's your robbery. Take the lead now, Doc.
00:31:23 It's very, very simple. We watch this bank. We watch the money go in.
00:31:29 When the money goes in, we then get our guns out. We go in and we start shooting up the place.
00:31:36 And then we take the gold and then we come out again. And then the gold will be, we'll have the gold.
00:31:44 We'll get our horses and we'll go. It's very simple plan.
00:31:48 Sounds a bit messy. Might I suggest an alternative?
00:31:52 Messy?
00:31:54 I know.
00:31:55 Are you trying to take over here, little missy?
00:31:58 Okay. Don't worry, McPuppyface. We're absolutely fine.
00:32:01 What I need you to bear in mind is that maybe I have an alternative.
00:32:04 You know, I have a gift and I think I can use it.
00:32:08 What kind of gift might you have that is better than just going in and shooting people?
00:32:14 Well, I can go in and possibly convince someone just to give us the money. Wouldn't that be fun?
00:32:19 Do people die when you do that?
00:32:21 No, but you can shoot whoever you like after. How about that?
00:32:24 Deal. I like it.
00:32:26 Wonderful. So now I will do this on one condition.
00:32:30 Feels like I'm doing all the legwork on this, Rick, but that's fine.
00:32:34 Name your price.
00:32:36 You sound like a sharp man. If we do this, we need your sharp brains and strong good looks on a team to take on the biggest, scariest villain of all. How do you feel?
00:32:49 Do I get to kill him?
00:32:51 Ricky Roose?
00:32:54 Oh, Ricky Roose. Sorry, can you use my name?
00:32:57 No.
00:32:58 I get confused if you don't use my actual name.
00:33:01 You sure can kill him after I'm done with him.
00:33:06 Shooting a corpse? I ain't done that since last week, it was quite the tickle, actually.
00:33:13 Oh, fuck it, I'm in. Sounds fun.
00:33:16 And with that, we see the carriage arrive now down the high street. The stagecoach carrying the bullion.
00:33:22 Trundles down the high street, trundles across the sand, settles outside the United Bullion Bank and immediately a bunch of bank hands make their way out of the building to start loading this gold in.
00:33:35 They load it in piece by piece by piece until all the gold is inside.
00:33:40 Feel free to interrupt it when you need to. And once they're done, they simply make their way back to the stagecoach, saddle up and ride back out of town.
00:33:52 Miss Demonique, I believe this is where you step in.
00:33:56 If things go sideways, you just give me a little holler and I'll come in here and shoot someone.
00:34:03 That's what I do.
00:34:05 Thank you, Mook, Weena.
00:34:08 So, I wander in, happy as Larry, say hello to everyone.
00:34:13 And considering it's actually not that two different times difference, I actually look kind of like I fit in.
00:34:18 I'm the right clothing. It's kind of Victorian-ish era.
00:34:20 So I'm like, I fit right in. I just sound kind of different with an accent like this, which Americans love an English accent.
00:34:27 That's fine. And so I wonder, and then I just go straight up to the counter and I have just feel my beautiful inner voice just crawl into me.
00:34:40 And I do my best to throw her into a person behind the counter to possess them.
00:34:49 And they will go get the money for me.
00:34:53 OK, so outside, Rick, Mad Dog, your gang are all just watching in disbelief as this woman saunters inside.
00:35:01 Lo, that's a look roll from you.
00:35:05 This was my idea, by the way, McCree.
00:35:08 Eight. Oh, no, nine plus one.
00:35:11 Grand. Yeah, you immediately shoot inside the body of Nebbins Smith.
00:35:16 Small man, loves his job, has no life outside of it, just loves admin and paperwork.
00:35:20 And you are now inside his body.
00:35:21 So I'm inside his body. So it's not me. It's my other half.
00:35:24 Blessed and absolute babe. And he just grumbles over to the gold.
00:35:29 She just he she gets inside his body. I pick up the gold.
00:35:33 So he goes over, picks over the gold and picks up as much as his hands can carry.
00:35:38 And then she says, is it on the counter?
00:35:41 And then he places it on the counter and demonic just politely says, thank you so much.
00:35:45 It's been so wonderful doing business with you. And then I just scoop it all up.
00:35:49 Then I saunter out like no one's business.
00:35:51 OK, so there's quite a lot of gold that you're able to scoop up a certain amount of a very heavy metal in your dress.
00:35:56 But there's yeah, there's a fair amount of gold. So it's going to take a few more people to get the rest of it out.
00:36:01 But Mad Dog, Rick, you see, and the rest of the gang see the demonic leave the bank with some gold bullion in her dress like an apple.
00:36:09 Boys, help her out. Help her out. Let's get her out of here.
00:36:12 Oh, wonderful. Thank you, boys. So kind. So many gentlemen around these parts.
00:36:15 See, Rick, so many lovely people. Hey, hey, you there.
00:36:20 Stop. Stop. Stop what you're doing right now.
00:36:23 It's the familiar gravelly voice of the local town sheriff who was out for his afternoon cigarette,
00:36:29 leaning on the wooden post in front of his office and suddenly sees a woman he's never met before,
00:36:33 carrying lumps of gold bullion out in their dress and then a gang of the ugliest looking reprobates
00:36:38 and a man in a weird metal suit rush inside the bank after her.
00:36:43 Deputies, deputies, we got ourselves a robbery.
00:36:46 And two young men in very clean waistcoats speed out from this sheriff's office and they all rush towards the bank where you and the gang are.
00:36:53 What are you doing? Boys, law enforcement's here. Start shooting.
00:36:58 Give me a look roll for your men.
00:37:02 Look is zero. And it is a seven.
00:37:07 That's enough to peg one of the deputies right in the neck, straight through the back end.
00:37:14 He wheezes and then lands on his back. Rick, what are you doing?
00:37:18 I realized I can't move in the robot suit.
00:37:23 I haven't actually moved since we got here. Since I put it on, we time jumped.
00:37:28 And it's all so heavy because it was just big planks of metal.
00:37:34 I thought it would just work, but it hasn't.
00:37:38 So I just stand there and I yell, get behind me, use me for cover.
00:37:44 Okay. I would say that can be a look roll because you're wearing your best friend to see if you can be sufficient cover.
00:37:53 Zero. Seven.
00:37:56 Seven. Just about. Yeah. It's quite a clunky suit.
00:37:59 The three conscious members of Mad Dogs get behind you and they just start basically peering out from behind a shoulder or under a thigh, firing off a couple of shots and they're going to have time to keep the sheriff's men at bay.
00:38:08 Where are we going to put this? We've only got as far as getting out. Where do we go, dear?
00:38:12 We'll get to my horses. We need to get out of town quick. We need to deal with these lot first.
00:38:16 I'm pulling out my gun and I'm going to start shooting at the sheriff.
00:38:20 Give me a reel roll for that.
00:38:23 What? My reel is minus one.
00:38:28 It's still a seven.
00:38:30 Yeah, you take out another deputy and it's just the sheriff now who's sort of ducking behind the rocking chair outside his office.
00:38:36 The wood is not as good cover as a giant metal suit.
00:38:40 You've got him pinned down basically between with the loss of his two deputies and with the rest of the gang safely ensconced behind metallic Rick Thunder.
00:38:47 You have him pinned down. Get out of here, boys. We need to get moving.
00:38:52 You're going to grab me more gold. You're just going to peg it.
00:38:55 We've got the gold we need. I think we're all we need.
00:38:59 But it's too heavy for me to carry. Can I just get a piggyback on the guy behind the counter?
00:39:04 Nesbit, I think. Nesbit Smith.
00:39:07 Nebbins. Nebbins, that's it.
00:39:10 I can't run, so I need to ride someone. So is that OK?
00:39:13 That's absolutely fine. Give me a, um, give me, I guess it's a, I guess it's a look roll.
00:39:20 Nebbins roll.
00:39:23 Love a Nebbins roll. What's a Nebbins?
00:39:27 I can't believe this is when I get. Nebbins roll! Nebbins comes through Nebbins!
00:39:33 Hi ho Nebbins!
00:39:36 As soon as you jump on Nebbins' back, he just squats down, he tenses his muscles and his bank uniform bursts off his chest to reveal an incredibly toned athletic body.
00:39:45 He gets down on all fours on his hands and knees, waits for you to sort of get up on his back.
00:39:50 And then just makes almost like a noise.
00:39:55 And then just gallops outside.
00:39:59 Oh, be darned.
00:40:02 That's the craziest shit I've ever seen. I've literally seen a man who thinks he's a cow.
00:40:12 So yeah, the gang is still keeping the sheriff at bay behind Rick, standing there steadfast as a metallic shield.
00:40:19 Yeah, Mad Dog, you're carrying as much gold as you can and the rest is basically loaded up on the back of Nebbins, who is running like a prize thoroughbred straight out the bank, straight towards where the horses are all tied up.
00:40:33 You want to ex-carry me? Because I can't move.
00:40:36 Make a.
00:40:37 No.
00:40:38 I'm going to have to drag you. If I can feel that move, I'm going to have to drag you with me.
00:40:42 Okay, give me a power roll to see if you can drag Rick.
00:40:44 Oh man, minus one, fucking hell.
00:40:49 Minus one is... seven again.
00:40:52 Seven. Just about. It takes you and also the combined efforts of the rest of your gang, still using him as a human shield as they drag him, to drag the metallic heavy body of Rick Thunder through the sand.
00:41:05 I feel like I'm the last contributor.
00:41:08 I've got a good hat though.
00:41:11 I feel like you sat on your hat.
00:41:13 Until you make it back to the horses.
00:41:14 I squashed the guy. I did the squash guy's hat.
00:41:20 I knew I recognised that hat!
00:41:23 Oh no.
00:41:24 Yeah, you make it back to where the horses are tied up and the remainder of your unconscious gang is still resting.
00:41:29 Safely away from the Sheriff at this point. The rest of the gang start unloading the gold.
00:41:35 Couldn't have gone any better boys. Thank you very much.
00:41:41 Honestly, it went down exactly as I thought it would.
00:41:45 Nebbins drops down to his knees to allow you to get off his back.
00:41:49 Thank you, Nebbins.
00:41:52 Do I get to keep him?
00:41:55 Tell you what, man. Give me a look roll. I'm going to need a hard success and we'll see what happens.
00:42:04 He's a wild Nebbins now.
00:42:07 It's an 8.
00:42:10 I could re-roll. Is Nebbins worth a finger? No.
00:42:14 Excuse me?
00:42:17 I wish I could quit you, Nebbins.
00:42:21 Nebbins having helped unload the gold from his own back, walks up to you on all fours still.
00:42:30 And bows his head, scrapes his feet across the ground.
00:42:37 And then just gives you a sort of that kind of look of respect and affection that only a horse can give.
00:42:43 As the chip's time travel cube starts to glow blue again as Rick gets back close to it.
00:42:51 Cool. Oh, it's going to go. So is Nebbins coming?
00:42:55 Was that a look of respect and I'll follow you wherever through time?
00:43:01 That is a look of respect from Nebbins, but I'm afraid that needed to be a hard success.
00:43:05 So we'll see what happens.
00:43:07 Look of ultimately of a bank manager.
00:43:11 Poor Rick Thunder, seeing someone making friends with a horse.
00:43:15 Quick, everyone help drag me over to this box.
00:43:21 What box is this?
00:43:23 Go on without me, I'm carrying me with you.
00:43:26 What the hell's up with this box, man?
00:43:28 So the gang is able to get you close enough to it.
00:43:30 And then that blue light coming from the box gets brighter and brighter.
00:43:32 And then all of a sudden, all you see is blinding blue light.
00:43:36 And then the light is gone.
00:43:39 And Rick.
00:43:44 Mad dog.
00:43:46 Demonique.
00:43:48 You find yourselves in another unfamiliar place.
00:43:53 You see a large and liquor stained armchair in a large and liquor stained drawing room,
00:43:59 littered with piles of electronics and machinery.
00:44:02 On the wall above the dilapidated fireplace is a faded painting of a very serious, very imposing looking man.
00:44:10 Corroded brass plaque beneath it is engraved with the words, life isn't fair.
00:44:17 Seated in this armchair, you see the one, the only, the black sheep of the robotics scene.
00:44:26 Piston Fairmont with a whiskey in his hand. He throws it back aghast to see the time travellers who've materialised in his rather dilapidated, run down manor.
00:44:39 There are robots everywhere.
00:44:42 Empty whiskey bottles, cables snaking all the way up to the wall to the ceiling, which has a mechanism on it.
00:44:50 And Piston, he grabs his screwdriver, which he carries with him.
00:44:56 He's completely stained from head to toe in grease.
00:44:59 And he says, who the devil are you?
00:45:03 Where the hell are we? Where is this place?
00:45:07 This is the year 3000. I've been here before.
00:45:09 My name's Rick Thunder Piston Fairmont and we need your help.
00:45:14 My God, is that a robot man?
00:45:18 You've found a way to symbiosis yourself with this metal suit.
00:45:22 You're what I've been searching for.
00:45:25 I will get it back. I will reclaim my legacy.
00:45:28 Please, please tell me, tell me how.
00:45:31 How have you formed symbiosis with this metal robo suit?
00:45:36 He fell in a bin.
00:45:37 So I pretty much just, it was a lot of gaffer tape.
00:45:42 Gaffer tape?
00:45:44 Parts of my old jet.
00:45:48 Jet?
00:45:49 Now I am somewhat stuck in it.
00:45:52 But what you could do, I did manage to make a mech sentient.
00:45:57 A jet sentient.
00:45:59 That's exactly what I'm looking for.
00:46:01 So it might not be symbiosis, but if you help me turn this really quite encumberson suit into something more effective,
00:46:11 I can tell you how you can make robots think.
00:46:16 Yes. And finally the name Fairmont.
00:46:19 It will mean something again, father.
00:46:22 You will be proud. I will bring our name back to prominence.
00:46:26 And we will finally eclipse that damn Alexi Tetris.
00:46:31 Fine.
00:46:32 That's a good go.
00:46:34 You see, I see three of you.
00:46:37 Right now, I'll help you if you help me.
00:46:41 Looking at my stopwatch.
00:46:43 It's time.
00:46:44 My experiments.
00:46:45 If you help me with this experiment, I'll help you do whatever it is you need me to do.
00:46:49 Understand?
00:46:50 Yeah.
00:46:51 Right.
00:46:52 No!
00:46:53 What is the experiment?
00:46:54 You there. Ah, enchanté, mademoiselle.
00:46:57 I take a hand and plant a greasy kiss upon it.
00:47:01 I need you to stand over here.
00:47:03 And when I say go, I need you to flick this power switch.
00:47:06 You, the man with the hat, you seem brawny, as they say.
00:47:11 You seem to have some meat going on underneath those sleeves, eh?
00:47:15 I need you to pull this winch here.
00:47:19 Can you do that for me?
00:47:21 Uh...
00:47:23 I'm sor-
00:47:24 Who are you?
00:47:26 Why all this place?
00:47:27 The hell is a robot?
00:47:29 What's a-
00:47:31 My name is Piston Fairmont.
00:47:35 I am formerly of Fairmont Robotics.
00:47:38 I used to be the wealthiest man in the world.
00:47:42 I am the son of the father of robotics.
00:47:46 Damn, I didn't ask for your life story, man.
00:47:48 I just wanted to know where the hell I am.
00:47:49 You did! No, you did, though! You did!
00:47:51 So, I-
00:47:52 Thunder? Thunder, what is this place?
00:47:54 Where the hell are you taking me?
00:47:55 What happened to my gold?
00:47:57 There's even more gold here, uh, McCree.
00:48:00 Yeah.
00:48:01 I got gold?
00:48:03 Do what the guy says.
00:48:05 I got gold! I got the g-
00:48:07 The winch! I got the winch! I got it then.
00:48:10 Get me that gold.
00:48:11 Excellent. And it looks like you conduct electricity, my old metallic friend.
00:48:18 So I'm going to ask you to hold these two cables.
00:48:21 Yes, the storm is reaching its apex.
00:48:24 It's almost time.
00:48:25 Now, you see, things have been a little bit lean in the Fairmont family for a while,
00:48:29 so we have unfortunately lost a little bit of the old electric bill.
00:48:34 So we're going to have to do this the old-fashioned way.
00:48:37 Mad Dog, was it? Please, the winch! It's almost time.
00:48:41 Give me a power roll on that winch, Mad Dog.
00:48:44 Hit my arm on the radiator.
00:48:46 [Laughter]
00:48:48 Soldier up, Mad Dog.
00:48:51 Ah, smack. That'll be, um, four.
00:48:55 Mad Dog, Jesus Christ!
00:48:56 Sorry, man, my elbow.
00:48:59 This is a winch that, like most of the stuff you designed,
00:49:02 is normally the kind of manual labour that would be performed by robots in the year 3000.
00:49:06 So it's a little bit much for Mad Dog to do on his own.
00:49:10 Are my boys with me?
00:49:12 Unfortunately, no. Just the three of you made it through. No boys.
00:49:15 No Benz.
00:49:18 No bank clerk-cum-horse, I'm afraid, either.
00:49:21 I say, well, I mean, I really should be on hand to do the last-minute tinkerings with the machines as they come to life.
00:49:28 Help me get it started.
00:49:30 I'll help you, I'll help you. And I grab and I also try and pull the winch.
00:49:33 Okay, both of you make a power roll. As long as the one of you succeeds, I'm happy.
00:49:36 All right, my power is minus one, of course.
00:49:39 But that is seven.
00:49:41 Nine.
00:49:43 Perfect. It seems I'm having to compete against another man who has riled up Mad Dog's hackles.
00:49:50 And a new sort of burst of adrenaline courses through your arms as the two of you successfully pull that winch.
00:49:57 So the roof above me opens and thunder and lightning fill the sky.
00:50:03 You can see that as the roof parts, all of these cables have been sneaking up the walls,
00:50:09 and they all coalesce around this pylon that reaches high, high above the manor into the heavens.
00:50:16 And look at my watch. Yes, yes, it's almost time.
00:50:20 You have that, you have that.
00:50:22 Now, when the lightning strikes, Demonique, was it?
00:50:26 Yes, it was.
00:50:27 Demonique, I'm going to need you to flick the switch and then, finally, I'll have them again.
00:50:33 My robo-boys, my wrestlers, I will have them back.
00:50:38 And as a sort of lightning goes off above us, you can sort of see in the darkness
00:50:45 lots and lots of mechanical wrestlers dotted around the room.
00:50:50 You have Macho Mandroid Ram D. Savage.
00:50:54 You have Y3J, Jon Botsley, Cainframe, Cyborg Lesnar, Bionic Jackson, Stone Cold Steve Automaton, and Brian Cage.
00:51:06 Ah, lightning striking. Lightning strikes the pylon, I guess.
00:51:13 Do I need to hand over to you, Tom?
00:51:15 So what is it exactly that you need Demonique to do?
00:51:18 When the lightning reaches her, travels through Rick Thunder's metal frame
00:51:24 and reaches this kind of big control unit, that's when I'm going to need Demonique to hit the switch
00:51:31 at just the right time to breathe life into my boys. We're doing this the old-fashioned way.
00:51:36 So, Mad Dog's done his part. Rick, I'm going to need a power roll from you to withstand this electricity
00:51:42 and I'm going to need a work roll from Demonique to get that timing absolutely right.
00:51:46 My power's minus two.
00:51:50 Oh dear.
00:51:54 Oh.
00:51:57 And, Demonique, what did you get?
00:51:59 I got a six.
00:52:01 Six, okay.
00:52:03 I need the help these days.
00:52:05 So yeah, these lightning powers, which have gathered above this laboratory, darken, rub against each other
00:52:12 and there is an almighty cracker, as a bolt of lightning shoots straight down into the laboratory
00:52:18 and passes through the metal, through the metallic armor of Rick Thunder.
00:52:26 However, this amount of force is more than a man who's had a busy day is able to quite put up with
00:52:34 and you lose your footing, you lose your balance slightly and rogue sparks of lightning start to jet off across the room.
00:52:40 Demonique, with the lightning not behaving as it should do, no matter how precise you are,
00:52:47 there's no way to time exactly when that switch should be switched
00:52:50 and as you switch it, there is a huge eruption of electric energy from the center of the room around Rick
00:52:57 as bolts of lightning shoot out across the lab into robot after robot after robot after robot after robot.
00:53:04 No, it's too powerful. I need the converter.
00:53:07 Oh no.
00:53:09 A huge whir of metal and cogs and buzzing electricity as an army of wrestling robots rise into life
00:53:22 and all immediately turn their eyes on you, Piston, and start advancing towards you.
00:53:30 What are you all doing?
00:53:32 Thunder, you got that damn thing in... can you get us out of here?
00:53:37 I'm currently on the floor in my robot.
00:53:40 Get your yellow belly ass up!
00:53:42 I can't move it. It's over there. It's by the... DD had it.
00:53:47 I don't mean to sound uncouth, but did any of you bring any weapons?
00:53:50 I got my gun.
00:53:52 No time like the present then, old boy.
00:53:55 You get the damn who did it, now go and shoot something.
00:54:01 Okay, go and shoot something, Mad Dog. Give me your real roll.
00:54:07 I really need to do some work.
00:54:10 Real is minus one. That'll be four.
00:54:14 Unfortunately, your old-timey revolver is just not enough to penetrate these metal bodies
00:54:19 and it ricochets off these robots.
00:54:22 These robots who strangely aren't moving erratically and randomly,
00:54:27 but seem to be working in perfect, organised unison.
00:54:31 They step at the same time, they move their left arm at the same time,
00:54:34 their heads turn to focus and follow Piston as he moves around the room at the same time.
00:54:39 They do move and hurt.
00:54:42 Rick, can you give me a power roll to try and get up, please?
00:54:45 Jeez, minus two on power.
00:54:47 My man, I really regret putting this on.
00:54:51 Three!
00:54:53 You're still stuck. Demonique, what are you doing?
00:54:55 I'm getting just increasingly frustrated.
00:54:57 I go get the box and I just put it next to him, being like, "Sort this out!"
00:55:01 And then I just go into myself and I take a deep breath in and I ask her to come out
00:55:05 and I try and bring out my demon so that I can just rip the shit out of whatever is happening.
00:55:11 Give me a look roll to summon your demon.
00:55:14 Yay.
00:55:16 It's a four.
00:55:22 What a bodge.
00:55:25 We'll say that your demon does make it out of your body.
00:55:29 Are you trying to send the demon from your body?
00:55:31 Are you trying to have it basically transform you at this point in time?
00:55:35 I would like it to transform me so that I can rip heads off robots.
00:55:38 I imagine she can give me that kind of strength.
00:55:40 Yeah, you are able to channel her.
00:55:42 But again, just like the weapons of the past are no good against these robots,
00:55:46 at this point in time, the ferocious animal energy of your other half
00:55:51 can't seem to penetrate these metallic hides.
00:55:53 And they're just not even really seeming to want to hurt either you or to hurt Mad Dog.
00:55:59 Just push the two of you aside and advance closer and closer on Piston.
00:56:02 All red robotic eyes glowing at him directly, piercingly.
00:56:06 Quickly, I need an action from every one of you again. Mad Dog.
00:56:09 I'm still just shooting. I don't know any better.
00:56:12 Make another real roll then.
00:56:14 I don't know any better.
00:56:16 Your guns are empty.
00:56:20 There'll be three.
00:56:22 Fuck me!
00:56:23 Okay, that's another bit of ricochet as the robot just ignores you.
00:56:27 Rick, Demonique has placed the device next to you at this point in time.
00:56:30 I've given you the thing.
00:56:31 I'm going to headbutt it.
00:56:33 What?
00:56:34 It's because I haven't got any arms.
00:56:36 Just tell me what you need doing. Tell me what you need doing.
00:56:38 I've pressed the button. There's a button on it. I'm going to headbutt it.
00:56:41 Give me a work roll on that.
00:56:42 Come on, work roll.
00:56:44 Plus one.
00:56:45 Argh, eleven!
00:56:47 Argh!
00:56:49 At the same time, what are you doing, Demonique?
00:56:52 At the same time, I am just... Bloody hell.
00:56:56 I'm just getting increasingly frustrated.
00:56:59 God, I've got nothing.
00:57:01 I'm trying to push him up.
00:57:03 I'm trying to get him back up.
00:57:05 Give me a power roll then.
00:57:07 That was all right, actually.
00:57:10 Seven.
00:57:12 Seven.
00:57:13 Oh, six. Sorry.
00:57:16 You try and try and try and push, but unfortunately,
00:57:19 the heavy metallic suit the Rictundle willingly put on his body
00:57:23 has made him still completely and utterly useless.
00:57:28 But his head is free.
00:57:30 And you are, with that number, able to bash your head
00:57:34 against this device just as a heavy metallic buzzsaw hand
00:57:39 advances on Piston.
00:57:41 Piston, what are you doing in this last moment?
00:57:44 I am going to have one last look at my father's portrait
00:57:50 and remember the final words that he said to me on his deathbed
00:57:56 after I'd blown the family fortune and condemned the Fairmonts
00:58:01 to a life of ignominy and scandal.
00:58:05 He said to me that life wasn't fair.
00:58:09 As Rictundle's head connects with the device once again,
00:58:11 there is a blinding flash of blue light garnished with purple time energy
00:58:19 and you are gone from the future.
00:58:21 And then suddenly, as your new surroundings settle,
00:58:26 all is quiet.
00:58:28 The sounds of robotic chaos are gone,
00:58:31 replaced by the low hum of older, cruder machinery.
00:58:36 You are in a laboratory, one that,
00:58:38 depending on the dimension you are from, will seem either too primitive,
00:58:41 too futuristic, or just right.
00:58:46 Surrounded by spectrographs and x-ray machines,
00:58:49 you notice a sign above the door.
00:58:51 Experimental Physics Laboratory, Grapp Valley University.
00:58:56 Ooh, stranger, I see you've made it back.
00:59:01 And you see, standing in the doorframe, the colourful braces,
00:59:05 colourful socks, and wiry, lean body of Chip,
00:59:10 chief science nerd from Grapp Valley High.
00:59:14 You old son of a bitch!
00:59:16 Oh, great to see you.
00:59:18 We've been using this time device you gave me with the science
00:59:23 and it must have taken us back here because we're in a panic.
00:59:26 I guess, presumably, you can help us.
00:59:29 I'm trying to find my best friend. Do you remember my car?
00:59:32 Stranger, are you telling me your car was your best friend?
00:59:35 Yes. Yes, I am.
00:59:38 Well, stranger things have happened.
00:59:41 Let me put these glasses up as nice.
00:59:43 So, I imagine you're a man, well, with very little time.
00:59:49 So what can I do for you?
00:59:51 Well, me and my new friends,
00:59:54 this is Mad Dog McCree, Piston Fairmut, and Daria.
00:59:59 Daria... Daria Dennis is her name, I think.
01:00:05 That's right.
01:00:06 We need to get to find the person
01:00:10 who took the life force of my best friend, Danger Zone.
01:00:15 Well, I'm sure there's something I can do.
01:00:19 He looks over at you, Piston,
01:00:21 and sees like a little screwdriver sticking out of your waistcoat pocket.
01:00:24 You look like a man of science.
01:00:26 Well, I'll give it a damn good shot.
01:00:29 Give me the box and I'll...
01:00:31 Well, it is my baby. It is my creation.
01:00:33 If anyone can figure out how to use this thing more precisely.
01:00:36 It's all chip.
01:00:38 Yes, if you wouldn't mind,
01:00:41 I'm a little bit more at home with all these gizmos and doodads,
01:00:45 a bit primitive.
01:00:46 Perhaps I could impart some of my knowledge
01:00:49 and we can get this done a little bit faster.
01:00:51 Sounds good to me, friend.
01:00:53 Rick, this may take a little while.
01:00:57 You want to pass the time.
01:00:59 I know you're a lover of the arts.
01:01:01 There's a play going on just across the hall in the theatre.
01:01:05 Mad Dog and Dee Dee,
01:01:08 can you wheel me over to the theatre, please?
01:01:10 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
01:01:12 Can I possess him for a second, please?
01:01:15 Make a look roll against Rick Thunder's reel.
01:01:20 I've done mine.
01:01:23 What was yours?
01:01:25 Let's hear your look first and then we'll hear Rick's.
01:01:28 Oh, OK. So that is...
01:01:30 What was... 11.
01:01:32 Seven.
01:01:34 You're instantly inside the body of Rick Thunder.
01:01:38 It's not doing a lot of moving right now,
01:01:42 but one thing you do immediately sense as you get inside there
01:01:45 is a deep, deep sadness.
01:01:51 And the sense of a man who's doing everything he can
01:01:54 to keep it hidden from those around him.
01:01:56 I know you're upset. I know you've got a lot on your plate.
01:01:59 But I've done a lot of work here today.
01:02:01 If you don't get my name right,
01:02:03 I'm going to bash your metal head against the wall.
01:02:05 Is that clear?
01:02:07 Demonique.
01:02:09 Demonique.
01:02:11 Demonique.
01:02:13 Thank you, Demonique. Honestly, in a real hell.
01:02:17 Don't tell everyone else when you're outside of my head.
01:02:20 It's absolutely fine. Do you need a biscuit?
01:02:22 I've got lunch still with me, remember?
01:02:24 Can you? A biscuit and a cup of tea and a cheese sandwich.
01:02:28 Do you know what I can go have? I think it's cucumbers.
01:02:31 That'll be OK, thank you.
01:02:33 I'm going to get out now. I don't want to be inside you any more.
01:02:36 Sorry, Demonique.
01:02:38 No, it's OK. Good boy. Buzzalove.
01:02:40 And you are back in the lab. Hand him a sandwich.
01:02:43 Why did you give me the sandwich? I don't need your help.
01:02:47 Thank you.
01:02:49 OK.
01:02:51 Will, it looks like you're not going anywhere particularly fast in that suit.
01:02:55 Why don't you leave the old metal shell with me and my new friend here
01:02:58 and we'll see if we can do something about speeding it up for you.
01:03:02 I think the show's already started.
01:03:04 You'd better rush if you want to catch the good stuff.
01:03:07 Can you crack me out of it, then?
01:03:10 Yes, I'll crack you out of it. And very quickly and effortlessly, with Piston's help,
01:03:13 the two managed to get the suit off you.
01:03:16 And that sort of crinkling sound, which everyone's been hearing for a while,
01:03:20 disappears for a while. You'd better rush.
01:03:23 What's a play?
01:03:26 So, you speed across campus.
01:03:29 We had plays back then, Matt.
01:03:33 I know, bangs and shooting.
01:03:37 You speed across the campus as quickly as you can.
01:03:41 You go through the door so fast you don't even have time to see what's on.
01:03:44 And as soon as you get inside, Laurie, can you please describe for us
01:03:49 the scene that Rick is walking into?
01:03:52 It's a school auditorium that's been decked out with sort of thick drapings,
01:03:58 almost like a bazaar, that sort of lead down to where all the seating is.
01:04:03 On stage, under the spotlight, are two figures.
01:04:06 Behind them are painted scenes of desert landscapes
01:04:10 and a cave in the shape of a jaguar's mouth and a huge castle.
01:04:17 And on stage, in the centre, atop a sort of like wooden balcony
01:04:22 that's been wheeled on, stands Amelia Dramica,
01:04:25 dressed in a blue sort of pantsuit.
01:04:30 And across from her is a figure dressed in sort of baggy robes
01:04:35 and with a big turban on his head.
01:04:38 And Amelia says, "Who's there?"
01:04:42 "It's me, Prince Ali."
01:04:46 "I do not want to see you."
01:04:49 "No, no, please, Princess, give me a chance."
01:04:53 And at this point you can see that Amelia is getting a bit frustrated.
01:04:57 She says, "Why would I give you a chance?"
01:05:03 "I mean, I'm the important one. People come from miles around to see me.
01:05:07 The entirety of Grapp Valley is here to see me.
01:05:09 And you think you could just flutter in here on your magic carpet
01:05:12 and make everyone pay attention? Because what?
01:05:15 Because you're the lead, you're a man, and you call me Princess?
01:05:19 I'm not a princess, darling, I'm a drama queen."
01:05:26 "Amelia, you're going off script."
01:05:30 "Just sing your pathetic little song."
01:05:37 # I can show you the world
01:05:41 # Shining, shimmering, splendid
01:05:45 # Tell me, Princess, now when did you last... #
01:05:51 "Take a magic carpet ride."
01:05:53 "Pay attention."
01:05:55 "You're a bit pitchy."
01:05:59 # I can open your eyes
01:06:02 # Take you wonder by wonder
01:06:06 # Over, sideways and under on a... #
01:06:11 "Amelia, what?"
01:06:13 # On a magic carpet ride
01:06:18 # A whole new world #
01:06:22 # A whole new... #
01:06:24 "Newfound."
01:06:26 "No, enough of this. Enough of this.
01:06:28 I have been dealing with this prima donna behaviour for the last three months
01:06:33 and I have had it up to here.
01:06:36 I am done. I am done. I am done with this."
01:06:40 "And you see the tall, broad-shouldered figure,
01:06:43 a figure you recognise as Bard from the tag team The Method,
01:06:46 a man that you clashed with in the ring.
01:06:49 Back in classic brawler wrestling, storm off the stage,
01:06:52 storm through the auditorium and leave,
01:06:55 leaving Amelia on her own in the middle of the stage,
01:06:59 halfway through her song."
01:07:01 "Well, a break in the fourth wall, darlings, as you can see.
01:07:08 Aladdin can hack it under the pressure.
01:07:12 So we've kind of...
01:07:14 Well, we could either do the whole thing with just me
01:07:17 or does anybody else want to come and try being Aladdin?"
01:07:21 And I pick up the turban that he's dropped on the floor
01:07:24 and I offer it out.
01:07:26 "Guys, guys, I literally just came out in the cinema
01:07:30 before I got thrown through the triangle.
01:07:33 It's called Aladdin. It's really good. It's got cracking songs.
01:07:36 So I think Mad Dog should go up there."
01:07:40 "I think Mad Dog should go up there as well."
01:07:43 "I mean, that does look like fun, right?"
01:07:47 "It does, Mad Dog. You should definitely do it."
01:07:50 "Flying carpets?
01:07:52 What a magical little world it sounds like."
01:07:55 "What are carpets?"
01:07:57 "Oh, it's a whole new world, one might say."
01:08:00 "No way, a whole new world.
01:08:02 Hot and sound. You should write that one down."
01:08:05 "I'm just going to...
01:08:07 I guess I've sort of heard them talking in the back, whispering.
01:08:11 You're not exactly being very subtle over there.
01:08:14 Are you coming up or not?"
01:08:16 "I am, I am. Absolutely."
01:08:18 "Not... Wait, Mad Dog, Mad Dog, on one condition.
01:08:21 Who's the Johnny Depp sort of character?"
01:08:24 "Oh, my name's Mad Dog.
01:08:27 Or might your name be?"
01:08:30 "My name is Emilia Dramacher,
01:08:32 the finest performer in all of Grapp Valley.
01:08:34 What are you here for? Why do you want to be in this play?"
01:08:37 "I can see that.
01:08:39 I was taken aback by your fantastic performance out there.
01:08:42 I thought it was absolutely..."
01:08:44 "You stop."
01:08:45 "It was wonderful."
01:08:46 "We save the accolades for afterwards, darling."
01:08:48 "The audience is getting really restless at this point.
01:08:50 A couple of them have actually got up and started to leave
01:08:52 due to this hiatus."
01:08:53 "Sit your ass down or I will shoot you where you stand!"
01:08:56 "Give me a look roll."
01:08:58 "Ten."
01:09:02 "Ten. They immediately sit down just straight on the floor,
01:09:05 like cross-legged on the floor right where they are
01:09:08 and shut up and their eyes fixed to the stage."
01:09:11 "What are you doing here?
01:09:14 You're a little ragtag group of performers?
01:09:18 Doing some... What are you doing?
01:09:19 Like a troupe that does...
01:09:21 You seem to be doing a roving performance of 'Oklahoma'
01:09:23 across with 'My Fair Lady' and 'The Tin Man'."
01:09:27 "Perhaps. My name's Mad Dog.
01:09:29 That over there is a man who is in love with a jet.
01:09:33 That over there is a lady who I think might be a witch.
01:09:38 There is a man who does machines in another room
01:09:43 and apparently this Thunderfella here travels through time."
01:09:49 "Pretty much all caught up."
01:09:53 "Get on with the show!"
01:09:55 "Did I say...?"
01:09:57 "I've just got a lot of exposition to do."
01:09:59 "I want to hear from you. If I want to hear from you, man,
01:10:01 I would shoot you so you would holler."
01:10:03 "Mad Dog, Mad Dog, can I tell you a tiny secret
01:10:08 just before we get into this?"
01:10:11 "Yeah?"
01:10:13 "Acting doesn't really do it for me anymore."
01:10:17 "But you sound darn good at it."
01:10:19 "A while ago I had to go through some stuff
01:10:24 and get the kind of starring roles that I obviously deserved.
01:10:27 But, you know, it involved a bit of, shall we say, violence.
01:10:33 And you lot seem to me to be on a quest of some sort,
01:10:40 on some sort of mission that might involve a bit of excitement
01:10:43 and a bit of drama.
01:10:45 Let me make you a little pitch of why I should join your slambory,
01:10:49 fabulous me, Amelia Dramica.
01:10:53 "I'm strong as ten regular men, take it from me.
01:10:57 'Cause I've bested the drama club boys,
01:10:59 a fight's my only true joy.
01:11:01 Anyone else I'll destroy, so please take me."
01:11:04 And as I'm doing that, she's sort of running around the stage
01:11:07 and the chorus are coming in to join in,
01:11:09 and she's flailing her fists around.
01:11:11 And as she moves into the finale of the song,
01:11:14 she begins high-kicking, one by one,
01:11:16 just nailing the members of the chorus who are singing on stage,
01:11:19 and she puts the face, "Slambory, fabulous me, Amelia Dramica.
01:11:26 The true star and just not some wannabe.
01:11:30 So if you listen to the words of my song,
01:11:32 you know you need to take me along.
01:11:34 I got sweets and music, gigs and figure fours.
01:11:36 I'll hit with a chair, DDT on the floor,
01:11:38 with a high spot, heel hooks and cheap shots.
01:11:40 So count out the one, two, three, and just take along me."
01:11:47 And she does this, she's--
01:11:49 The guy who's Aladdin is crept back in,
01:11:51 and she's kicking, just-- Brainbuster.
01:11:55 "Amelia Dramica, about ten minutes ago, I made up a new saying.
01:12:00 You want to come to a whole new world with us?"
01:12:04 "A whole new world?"
01:12:06 "Yeah, I just made it up, right?"
01:12:08 "Fantastic point of view. I'm in."
01:12:11 Okay, and with that, we're going to quickly cut back to the lab.
01:12:14 Piston, can you tell me how successful you and--
01:12:18 In fact, give me either a look or a work role.
01:12:22 That would be-- They're both plus one.
01:12:25 All right, let's give it a go.
01:12:28 That is a seven.
01:12:30 Okay, tell me how much progress you've made,
01:12:32 how good your job on Rick's heavy, cumbersome,
01:12:35 deadweight armor has been.
01:12:37 So, it's not a critical success.
01:12:40 Basically, I feel like I've lost the ability to create a sentient robot.
01:12:46 I feel like I've lost the ability to form that connection
01:12:50 between man and machine.
01:12:52 However, I have been able to fashion him
01:12:55 a rather spiffy, lightweight suit of armor.
01:13:00 Thank you.
01:13:01 Fully mobile.
01:13:03 It has articulation and everything.
01:13:09 Can you also explain to me the new secret high-five handshake
01:13:14 you and Chip have developed?
01:13:16 Okay, it involves-- We basically just juggle our inhalers,
01:13:21 swap glasses, push them up our nose.
01:13:24 Okay, science bros, science bros.
01:13:26 I would say, with my new friend's help here,
01:13:28 I'm very confident that the next time you press this button,
01:13:32 you should find yourselves exactly where the interstellar conceptual remains
01:13:43 of your best friend robot horse car wolf soul lies.
01:13:50 All you need to do is press--
01:13:54 It's best friend.
01:13:57 Now talk. It's best friend.
01:13:59 Okay, yeah, yeah.
01:14:00 As soon as you press this button, you'll be transported to, honestly,
01:14:05 somewhere I have no idea where it is.
01:14:07 What is all I know is this is, if anything remains of your friend,
01:14:12 this is where it exists.
01:14:13 So if there's anything you'd like to say to each other before you go,
01:14:16 now's the time.
01:14:17 So I'm joined by a cowboy, a demon-powered lady,
01:14:23 a tech genius, and a badass drama student now addicted to violence.
01:14:30 Sounds thoroughly irresponsible, darling.
01:14:35 That sounds like the sort of team that can not just get me back home,
01:14:41 but also get my best friend back.
01:14:45 We're coming for you, evil question-collector-force-thing-man.
01:14:51 Huh? You're quite the team.
01:14:54 What is it that you call those?
01:14:57 Amelia and friends.
01:15:01 Oh, thank God.
01:15:02 The other shit-kickers.
01:15:04 The Fairmonts.
01:15:08 Rick Thunder estimated.
01:15:14 Rick Thunder and the Lightning.
01:15:17 Yeah, the Lightning people.
01:15:20 The Lightning people.
01:15:21 The Lightning family.
01:15:23 We're the Lightning people.
01:15:24 We're the Lightning family.
01:15:26 The Lightning fam- Oh, God.
01:15:28 Yeah, all right.
01:15:30 Well, it's canon now, says Chip, and presses for you.
01:15:35 And all of a sudden, you disappear once again in a blinding flash of blue light.
01:15:42 And then when the light settles,
01:15:45 you find yourself standing in the center of a wrestling ring.
01:15:50 Well, well, well.
01:15:54 What time do you call this?
01:15:59 Welcome to CBW.
01:16:04 Welcome to Crisis Between Worlds.
01:16:09 That's all for this time on CBW.
01:16:12 We'll see you all next time.
01:16:15 That's all for part one.
01:16:17 Stay tuned this time next week.
01:16:19 It all ends.
01:16:20 It's basically just a big fight.
01:16:22 We cannot wait for you to see it,
01:16:24 because we had a lot of fun filming it,
01:16:27 tying up all of those loose ends.
01:16:30 Yeah, if you do want to see that show early,
01:16:33 please do become one of our patrons.
01:16:35 Patreon.com/NoRollsBard
01:16:37 Like these legends scrolling along the bottom of the screen.
01:16:40 We appreciate each and every one of you.
01:16:42 We'll see you next week, where it really all comes to an end.
01:16:48 Jam that jam.