• il y a 5 mois
Transcription
00:00Nights, Family Restaurant and Entertainment Center, where you'll lose yourselves in a magical world of sorcerers and knights and castles.
00:08Unless you're the owner of a white pickup truck that's illegally parked in the restricted Merlin section of the parking lot.
00:15If you're that person, forget the whole magical world thing and prepare to have your vehicle towed.
00:21Come on guys, we don't want to be late for the big show.
01:01Wow Barky, looky, it's Sir Flinchelord, the white knighty.
01:07Wow!
01:09Find my apron. Touch my walker with your lap.
01:14You were great on that toilet cleanser commercial.
01:17Thank you for torturing me with that painful memory.
01:21Is there anyone young who would like an autograph?
01:25Excuse me, my nice grandmas. I need the white knight to sign my doggie.
01:30Thank you for that very, very odd request, strange little knight. Maybe another time.
01:37Hail, merry dinner guests. Please take your seats for our knightly dinner show.
01:43You insult their honor. For that, you pay.
01:48Hear ye, hear ye. Let us now venture back to a time of romance.
01:53A time before modern technology.
01:56A time before silverware and health codes.
01:59Huh?
02:00Uh?
02:01Uh?
02:02Uh?
02:03Uh?
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02:21Uh?
02:22A time before manners.
02:26A time of knighthood and chivalry.
02:31A time before pouring skills.
02:33Please, direct your attention to the arena.
02:36Hurray! Hurray! Hurray! Hurray!
02:39Sir Flinchlock, the White Knight of Nottingham, is ready to defend his honor against any challenger.
02:50Ready. Does anyone dare challenge the superior forces of goodness?
02:56Come on, you guys. Get into the action a little.
03:00Go on, Sparky. Defend your honor.
03:04I do the same thing every night.
03:06I waved all the old red morons with meat hanging out of their mouths.
03:10The stupid Black Knight enters the ring, and by the time I slay him,
03:14the entire audience has either gone home or is writhing in their seats,
03:18wrapped by severe intestinal distress.
03:22Stop! Right there!
03:27Get him, Blavesteed!
03:29What do you think you're doing? Look where you are!
03:32Look around!
03:39All right, Sparky.
03:41I'll show you what I'm made of.
03:43I'll show you what I'm made of.
03:45I'll show you what I'm made of.
03:47I'll show you what I'm made of.
03:50All right, then. If it's a fight you want, the joust is on!
03:55Prepare to defend thyself, mead-dog!
03:59I can hardly look.
04:01Sparky, jump!
04:09What is our brave challenger's name?
04:11Sparky!
04:13I hereby dub thee Sir Sparky.
04:16I hereby dub thee Sir Sparky.
04:27Oh, what a brave little dog!
04:30Five dollars in the money, Quack! Five dollars!
04:33No reason to push, nice grannies.
04:36Enough of Sparky for everybody!
04:39Hear ye! Hear ye!
04:41The next round of competition is about to commence.
04:44It's a battle of clubs over a moat filled with man-eating crocodiles.
04:49But alas, where is our beloved, albeit slightly tarnished, white knight?
04:54Could it be that our brave white knight is a chicken?
05:02Fickle fans! Fickle grannies! I'll show you!
05:06My goal is to knock my opponent off yon bridge and into the crocodile-filled waters below.
05:14Let's go!
05:24Let's see you get out of this!
05:33You think you can escape me?
05:37Zounds, I seem to be rusted.
05:40A little lubrication, please?
05:45Oh, no!
05:51Sparky! Sparky!
06:04Need a weapon to smiten the dog.
06:06And now, for our final and newest round of competition,
06:09our knights will attempt to pull the legendary sword Excalibur from its legendary stone
06:14and slay the legendary dragon of Black Castle!
06:17Dragon? What dragon?
06:19I told you, it's new.
06:26May taste brave knights!
06:28Whichever of you can remove the sword from the stone shall be king!
06:34Must smiten doggy! Must have sword!
06:40Dragon!
06:47On me, you compounded metal lizards!
06:50Alas, it looks like the white knight will slay the dragon and retain his throne!
06:55First the dog, then the dragon!
06:59Dragon!
07:08Oh, no!
07:12Well, it looks like a draw!
07:15We'll have to do it all over again tomorrow night!
07:18Danny Spanos here, big-time agent with BTPA, the Very Talented People Agency.
07:24You represent talented people?
07:26Why are you talking to me?
07:28Are you kidding? You're the absolute funniest man I have ever seen perform!
07:32Funny? You thought it was funny when I was chomped by alligators and torched by a dragon?
07:38Kill me! And by the way, you were also hilarious in the toilet cleanser act,
07:43the one where you played the cowardly stain hiding from the animated scrubbing thingies.
07:47Brilliant! Anyway, I'd like to represent you starting, like, now!
07:51Really? You're kidding! Where do I sign?
07:55On the dotted line, but before you do, I'd like to see you do that moat pratfall one more time!
08:00It killed me!
08:02Fine! You wait here! I'll go hurl myself into the moat!
08:06Just for the full effect, I'd rather see you do it with the dog!
08:09Huh?
08:11Let's go, doggie! Let's do the moat pratfall!
08:15First you say sorry to Foxy, then you apologize for offending your honor in front of the nice old granny!
08:22Sorry! Sorry! Sorry all round!
08:26Let's go, Barky, old fellow!
08:29Good doggy!
08:31On second thought, do the whole act!
08:41Hey, Barky!

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