the ghosts of motley hall - season 2 episode 6
the ghosts of motley hall - season 2 episode 6
Transcript
00:30Hey! Where's our table?
00:39Oh, it's buggered. Some snaffler's made off with it.
00:45Well, it's uncommon strange, ain't it? Maybe Gudgeon sold it.
00:50Rot the fellow! That's the only bit of furniture we had.
00:55Hey!
00:57Let's do it.
01:06It must have been a tremendous responsibility.
01:32Well, I think that's everything, Mr Hamilton.
01:34I'm so relieved and so pleased, of course.
01:37I was beginning to think...
01:39Yes, look, they're all labelled.
01:41I was beginning to think that I'd never sell the place.
01:44I don't believe it. Gudgeon's just handed over the keys.
01:47Smirking like an ill-bred camel.
01:49It's true, Sir George.
01:51Gloriana! But this is dreadful.
01:53Stanford Hives hates any publicity. He's a very solitary person.
01:58But when the press discovered the lighthouse, we simply had to find somewhere else.
02:02Yes, I quite understand.
02:03Being a multimillionaire has its problems, Mr Gudgeon.
02:07People will try to take advantage.
02:09Of course.
02:10Well, thank you once again, Mr Hamilton.
02:13I really think this is one of the happiest days of my whole life.
02:16Tell Mr Hives that I will respect his desire for solitude.
02:20When will he take up residence?
02:22Well, he has to wait for Jupiter.
02:24Jupiter?
02:27Yes, to move into his solar ninth.
02:30At the moment, there's a rather nasty aspect.
02:33Is there really? Mercury's retrograde...
02:35What's he babbling about?
02:37Astrology.
02:38Really?
02:39How the planets influence people's lives.
02:41Dupestitious public out here.
02:43No, it ain't, Sir George. There's a lot in it.
02:45And when will Jupiter be in the right place for him to...
02:49In a fortnight's time.
02:51What?
02:58Yes.
02:59Not much time to make plans, is there?
03:02What plans?
03:03How to get rid of this hive bear.
03:06Now, what I...
03:22You've a Jupiter-Mars conjunction to thank for that.
03:26You frighten me sometimes, Alec.
03:29And if Mr Hives ever realised...
03:31He won't. Not now.
03:33He can't do a thing without consulting me about his horoscope.
03:36He's not stupid.
03:37Not about money, maybe.
03:39Look, don't you understand? I am the only man in the world he trusts.
03:43I've got him just where I want him.
03:46What's the time?
03:47It's five to.
03:48Come on. He'll be arriving any minute now.
03:57What are those things doing here? Get rid of them.
03:59I thought it would be nice for him...
04:01Nice? We don't want anything nice for him.
04:03Get them out.
04:26CLICK
04:57Welcome to Motley Hall, Mr Hives.
05:02It looked better in the photographs.
05:05Er... Better, sir?
05:08Less cluttered.
05:10Put the car away.
05:12Sir.
05:15Did you have a pleasant journey, Mr Hives?
05:18Of course not.
05:21Your water, Mrs Hamilton.
05:23He's in old misery, ain't he?
05:25Have all the burglar alarms been fitted?
05:27Oh, yes, sir. To every window.
05:32Would you care for something to eat?
05:35I've no appetite.
05:40Who's that ugly-looking brute?
05:42What?
05:43One of the...
05:44You are lying to me!
05:46I wonder if they all looked as stupid as that.
05:49I believe they lived in Motley for nearly 400 years.
05:52I don't need a guided tour, thank you, Mrs Hamilton.
05:56So you wanted to share Motley Hall with this whine and mongrel, did you?
06:00Why not? Where are you?
06:11Anything special about tomorrow?
06:13Not for Capricorns, Mr Hives.
06:15The Venus, Jupiter, Trine and Thursday looks quite promising.
06:19Are all the doors locked?
06:21Yes, sir.
06:22The alarms set?
06:23Yes, sir.
06:24Good night, Hamilton.
06:26Good night, sir.
06:28Oh, if there's anything further you require, sir,
06:31you'll find Mrs Hamilton and me in a wee room just down this corridor here, sir.
06:35We thought the ground floor would be more convenient.
06:37Yes, yes, yes.
06:38The master bedroom's at the top of the stairs on the left, sir.
06:41I've laid out your things.
06:42As you'd hope, sir.
06:43Sir.
06:46Insufferable beggar!
06:48How can decent folk like that put up with him?
06:50The sooner he's dealt with, the better.
06:52You won't find it easy, he's Capricorn.
06:54Capric...
06:56Paddock! Forward!
06:58But I was...
06:59Oh, well, Sir George, shall I...?
07:00No, please.
07:01Sir, please.
07:13Whoa...
07:18Whoa...
07:21Whoa...
07:25Oh.
07:26Whoa...
07:28What's the matter?
07:29If he'd been Scorpio instead of Capricorn...
07:32Stand aside.
07:33Do you really imagine you could do better?
07:35We shall soon find out, shall we?
07:37Yes.
07:38Stamford High!
07:40Oh.
07:41Please.
07:44I am the spirit of Sir George Upron.
07:49Doomed forever to walk.
07:55Doomed forever to walk!
07:57It's not so easy, is it?
07:59Great glats and many a completely insensitive.
08:01We'll have to think of something else.
08:04What?
08:05No, I don't know.
08:06I hate throwing things about, it's a problem.
08:08Quite.
08:09Must preserve a sense of decorum.
08:10First impressions are most important.
08:13I wonder...
08:14Aha!
08:15He can see me!
08:17Who are you?
08:18General Sir George Upron.
08:19The White Lady of Motley Hall.
08:21What do you want?
08:22We...
08:24What is it, money?
08:25It's him!
08:26Well, say something, you idiot!
08:28Uh...
08:29Boo.
08:30Boo.
08:31I'm...
08:32I'm not who you think you are.
08:34Whoever that was.
08:36Hamilton?
08:37Don't call Hamilton, please.
08:38Followed me in here to rob me, have you?
08:40In that fancy dress.
08:42Well, no, I've...
08:44I've something to tell you.
08:46Have you?
08:47Yes.
08:48You see...
08:49I'm different.
08:51I think you are.
08:52Yes, and I'm not the only one.
08:54There are several of us.
08:56They're in fancy dress, too?
08:57Yes.
08:58No.
08:59I'll give you a clue.
09:01Clue.
09:02Clue.
09:03I see.
09:04He's...
09:07God heavens, you're...
09:09You're a...
09:10Quiet.
09:11Quiet.
09:12Do that again.
09:13Tell him we want him to leave.
09:15What?
09:16I said do that again.
09:17I was talking to her.
09:19Her?
09:20The White Lady.
09:22Oh, one of them.
09:24Yes, and this is Sir George.
09:28I can't see him either.
09:30Well, some people can't see any of us.
09:32Hamilton, he can't.
09:34I say, you're not a jot alarmed, are you?
09:37You're not real?
09:38What?
09:39Ain't I?
09:40No, just an hallucination.
09:41What?
09:42I'll give that back, a hallucination.
09:43Get him out of here.
09:44They want you out.
09:45Out?
09:46Out of Motley.
09:47Oh, do they?
09:48Yes, Sir George is getting uncommon worked up about it.
09:51And when would he like me to leave?
09:53As soon as possible.
09:54As soon as possible?
09:55How about you?
09:56Me?
09:57Yes, you.
09:58Well...
09:59Fanny!
10:00What?
10:01I don't mind you living here.
10:03You crawly little turncoat.
10:05Well, there's room for all of us in there, Borders.
10:07Yeah, plenty of room.
10:09Good old Fanny.
10:10Good Lord, two more of them.
10:12The place is infested.
10:13Fawning puppy.
10:15So, you three, don't mind if I stay.
10:17You want me to leave.
10:18Room for all of us.
10:20Is that it?
10:21Well, you disembodied squatters, let me tell you.
10:24Motley Hall belongs to me.
10:26I don't intend sharing it with anyone, alive or dead.
10:29Odds, Bud, Sir.
10:30Ah, vanish.
10:32So much for your live and let live.
10:35He won't do us any harm if we keep out of his way.
10:38I am a soldier, Sir.
10:40It is my duty to fight.
10:42The path of duty is the way to glory.
10:50Good day.
11:20Good day.
11:50Good day.
12:21Doubtless you're all wondering why I've called you here today.
12:38The fact is,
12:41that thanks to my single-handed campaign of intimidation,
12:47the enemy is retreating on all fronts.
12:51And soon, my efforts will be crowned
12:55with the...
12:57laurel wreath...
12:59of...
13:05victory.
13:08Sir George!
13:09His hives!
13:10He's moved into the bell tower!
13:17You mustn't give way, Sir George.
13:45He's...
13:47sold it.
13:55With Saturn and your solar angle,
13:58I will pursue yesterday's financial developments, Mr. Hives.
14:01Investments.
14:02Oh, undoubtedly.
14:03I'll ring the city straight after breakfast.
14:05Breakfast?
14:08Mercury is in the six hives.
14:11An egg?
14:12Not while the moon's in opposition.
14:15What can I have then?
14:17Perhaps a few nuts?
14:19Some lemon juice?
14:25Any other unfavorable aspects?
14:28Not at the moment, Sir.
14:30Oh.
14:38Lemon juice and nuts!
14:41You're overdoing it, Alex.
14:43The moon is in opposition!
14:45But he's fading away.
14:47Oh, poor old Stanford. He'd be lost without his horoscope.
14:51He'd be lost without me.
14:53What?
14:55Been cheating it for years, if you ask me.
14:57Completely under Hamilton's thumb.
15:00Serves a beggar right.
15:02Yeah, but don't you see?
15:03It's her answer.
15:05What?
15:06It ain't Hives we've got to get rid of.
15:08It's Hamilton.
15:10Hello?
15:12This is Mrs. Hamilton.
15:14Motley Hall.
15:16I'd like to order for next week.
15:19Seven lemons.
15:21Two pounds of hazelnuts.
15:23Two small tins of tuna fish.
15:25Yes, although this morning was quite promising.
15:27Extreme caution is indicated this afternoon, Sir.
15:30No takeover bids.
15:32Certainly not more than two.
15:34Thank you.
15:35Right.
15:36I think that's all, Mr. Hives.
15:38Except for the bank.
15:39Just get me the local telephone book, will you?
15:41Sir.
15:46Hurry, men.
15:54Must be a branch in Grindleston.
16:01Ah, yes, sir.
16:03Still worse.
16:05Your life on money, Sir?
16:06Hamilton's in the secret passage.
16:08Is there anything else required, Sir?
16:09Check their things.
16:11Why do you ask?
16:12It's Thursday, Sir.
16:13Thursday?
16:14Our half day, Sir.
16:16Oh, then you'd better go, I suppose.
16:19Sir.
16:24Oh, dear, dear, dear.
16:26What?
16:27Found it in the tool shed.
16:28Good lad.
16:30And the gates?
16:31Aye, you were right. Spanking new ones.
16:33Sir George?
16:34Gadgeon's telephone number is 281, precisely.
16:37Hold up.
16:38What's Gadgeon got to do with this?
16:39You'll see.
16:40But I still don't follow.
16:41How are we going to get rid of the Hamiltons?
16:42We ain't.
16:43We're going to get Hives to think that the Hamiltons have walked out and left him.
16:46Ah.
16:50We're off now, Sir.
16:52Back not a moment later than six.
16:54Sir?
16:56As soon as they're through those gates, lock them out.
17:03Keep the chain quiet.
17:08Now he'll have his little sleep.
17:10Aye.
17:13Sir George.
17:14Huh?
17:15Go to the Hamilton's room.
17:16Bring everything.
17:17Clothes, chattels, baggage, all.
17:19Fine.
17:20Come along, Fanny.
17:26You put your finger...
17:27I know how to do it.
17:28I've watched them.
17:30Number 281 and precisely.
17:34Number 281 and pray Gadgeon hears you.
17:52Hello.
17:54Is that Mr. Gadgeon?
17:56This is Mrs. Hamilton.
17:59Who did you say?
18:00Excuse me.
18:02Mrs. Har-milton.
18:04Mrs. Har-milton?
18:06Mm-hm.
18:07May husband and A have just left Mr. Stamford Heves' employment?
18:12No, you're very faint.
18:14No, I don't think so.
18:17Why are you telephoning me, Mrs. Harmilton?
18:22Why am I telephoning you?
18:24To teleph...
18:25To telephone Hives that you may have left the gas cooker.
18:29Left the gas cooking machine at night.
18:32Are you there?
18:34Would you...
18:36Would you telephone Mr. Heves?
18:39For he fear he left the gas cooking machine ablaze.
18:44Why couldn't you telephone him yourself?
18:47Farewell.
18:49Good work.
18:59Time.
19:06My time.
19:19Yes?
19:20Oh, uh, Mr. Hives.
19:23This is Arnold Gadgeon, Mr. Hives.
19:26We've not met.
19:27I was the executor of the Uproar Estate.
19:30I've just had a rather strange telephone call from your Mrs. Har-milton.
19:35It seems that she may have left the gas on.
19:39Left the gas on?
19:41Yes, I don't know why she couldn't telephone you herself.
19:45Maybe, of course, she was too embarrassed.
19:48Embarrassed? About leaving the gas on?
19:51No, about leaving your employment.
19:55What are you talking about?
19:57Well, leaving your employment. She and her husband.
20:01You did know, didn't you?
20:04When did she tell you this?
20:06A few moments ago.
20:08I say, I do hope that I'm not the unwitting bearer of unfortunate tidings.
20:13Oh.
20:17Let's take it out.
20:20Go on!
20:22Go and have a look.
20:45Where is it? Where is it?
20:47What's he looking for?
20:49Can't you guess?
20:51He must have seen something, something dreadful.
20:54But what? A square, an opposition?
21:09Oh, no, not you. I got rid of you.
21:11What's amiss, Stamford?
21:13Get out, get out.
21:14Fishhooks. Where's Hamilton?
21:16Will you go away? Vanish.
21:17Where is he?
21:18He left me.
21:20About time, too.
21:22Hello.
21:23What have we got here, then, eh?
21:25Norris. Norris.
21:26Give it back.
21:27It's very important. Come here.
21:29I say, oh, this is very interesting.
21:31I see Venus is in the tenth, and Mars, too.
21:34And the sun of your solar ninth is in trine aspect to your sign.
21:37It's even better.
21:39Watch out for Saturn. It's going to be malefic on the twelfth.
21:43Malefic, is it?
21:45This Jupiter-Moon sextile's interesting, no?
21:48So's this favourable conjunction down here.
21:50Very, very...
21:53What is it?
21:54Is that your horoscope?
21:56Of course it is.
21:57It can't be. This chart's made out with a Capricorn.
21:59That's right, I am a Capricorn.
22:00Don't talk daft, Stamford.
22:02I was born in December.
22:03What day?
22:05I'm not sure.
22:06Time?
22:07Well, I don't know.
22:08Whereabouts?
22:09I don't know that either.
22:10You've got a lot to go on, haven't you?
22:11What?
22:12Well, you can't work out a proper horoscope just on that.
22:14Well, I was an orphan.
22:16So was I. As a matter of fact, more orphan than not.
22:18More orphan than not, no?
22:20No.
22:21Oh, well, never mind.
22:23They must have got you mixed up with someone else at the orphanage.
22:26Mixed up?
22:27Must have done. It don't make sense, you being a Capricorn.
22:29Now, if you ask me, more like a Leo.
22:31But I've been a Capricorn all my life.
22:33Tried to be. Tried to be.
22:35That's where you've gone wrong.
22:37What do you mean?
22:38You've gone against your birth sign. That's why you're such a failure.
22:41A failure?
22:43But I'm a millionaire.
22:45I control a vast business empire.
22:47I'm immensely successful.
22:49Fish hooks.
22:51You're lonely, frightened, distrustful, bad-tempered.
22:54And if that ain't being a failure, I'd like to know what is.
22:57How dare you?
22:59I mean, you shut yourself away from the world,
23:01live on pills,
23:02and allow that Hamilton villain to run rings round you,
23:05and then when he leaves you, you go to pieces.
23:08Yes, but a Leo, I mean, how can you be sure?
23:11I can't.
23:12But I know you ain't a Capricorn.
23:14And trying to be one's bad for you.
23:17I mean, look at yourself.
23:20Why don't you give it a try for a bit?
23:22See how you go.
23:25A Leo?
23:26Yeah.
23:28Brought by the sun.
23:30Kind.
23:32Confident.
23:34Warm-hearted.
23:36Yeah, oh, but I'm none of those.
23:38Now, all my life I've been shy, you see.
23:40I've not been able to join in.
23:41I wouldn't know how to start being a Leo.
23:43Then I'll have to tell you.
23:44Get out.
23:45See the world.
23:46Meet the people.
23:48Meet people?
23:50Yeah, as many as you can.
23:52Leos are like that.
23:54Start enjoying yourself.
23:56Enjoy myself?
23:57Why not?
23:58Ain't impossible.
24:01Yeah, perhaps I could.
24:03Go on, Stamp.
24:05Try it.
24:07We're all behind you,
24:09ain't we?
24:10Yeah.
24:11Yes, but I've only just moved into Motley Hall.
24:14Well, move out again.
24:15Give it away.
24:17Give it away?
24:18Do you know how much I've paid for...
24:19Generous to a fault, Leos.
24:22Are we?
24:23Course.
24:25Yes, of course.
24:27Of course we are, yes.
24:28Of course we are.
24:30We are, yes.
24:31But who would I give Motley Hall to?
24:35Me.
24:36Well, why not?
24:37I know how much you love the place.
24:39But I...
24:40What?
24:41Don't know how to thank me?
24:42Don't try.
24:43But Mr. Hibes...
24:45Leo.
24:46Leo? I thought your name was Stamford.
24:48I know it was.
24:50But I decided to try being Leo for a time.
24:52I think it might change the whole of my life, could I?
25:01And thank you.
25:03Oh.
25:05Hmm.
25:06Don't look too happy about being the new owner of Motley, does he?
25:09No.
25:10Do you think he'll live here?
25:11Yeah, I shouldn't think so.
25:12Probably sell it.
25:19Hey.
25:21It couldn't be, could it?
25:34I see.
25:37That really is awfully decent of Stamford.
25:41Where do you want it, Sir George?
25:43Up! I want it up, of course!
25:46Over the fireplace.
25:48The way it used to be.
26:33© BF-WATCH TV 2021