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FunTranscript
00:00just thinking just a few short hours ago we were back in the predictable safety
00:16of our home and now we're rocketing through the wild and incredibly
00:20treacherous jungle in a vehicle with almost no safety features
00:31What? I can't hear you, I've got a bug in my ear!
00:39By joining me on a typical tourist safari, you sedentary, environmentally challenged television viewers
00:46will develop a greater appreciation not only for my personal genius, but of the world of rare and endangered animals
00:54Aha! I think we're about to get a treat!
00:57I've just heard the unmistakable call of the very rare hammer-baked carrot
01:04Shh! He's coming this way!
01:15Oh, how glamorous! There are people here to film me on safari!
01:20Actually, the cameramen are here to film me. I trust you got a lovely shot of me being run over just then
01:28Hey! You must be Dr. Pinkney! Dr. I. M. Pinkney, to be exact
01:34Being picky is nothing to be proud of, khaki boy!
01:38Pinkney! Not picky!
01:42Yay! Ducky Pinkneys!
01:45Anyway, we're real sorry about running you over like that
01:49Ever since Berkeley ate the map...
01:51Please release that bird! There's only 25 of them left on the entire planet!
01:59Can we edit that out?
02:03Listen very closely! Since this is probably your first trip anywhere wilder than your local mall
02:10you will need to follow a few basic rules
02:13Do not eat any wild fruits and berries, no matter how delicious they may appear
02:18Secondly, do not attempt to touch, feed, or play with any of the animals you may encounter
02:25And finally, what in the world is wrong with this dog of yours?
02:31Technically speaking, he's dysfunctionally good-natured. It's sort of a blessing wrapped in a curse
02:37Go dig a hole or something!
02:41Now, let's make camp
02:45Do you mind?
02:47You! You ecological menace!
02:50Release that bearded bandicoot at once!
02:53And you!
02:55You're only encouraging the dog by filming him like that!
02:58From now on, keep the cameras on me!
03:14And now I would like you to join me in what has been an eight-year search for a very rare, very reclusive little marsupial
03:21which the local natives refer to as the Aoui Ghandi
03:26Translated into English, Aoui Ghandi means, oh no, oh no, please get it off me
03:35This is because the silly natives believe quite superstitiously
03:39that this harmless, clinging little creature brings bad luck to all its encounters
03:47Why are you filming that dog again?
03:50Release the Aoui Ghandi!
04:01I hate to say it, Dr. Pinkney, but it looks like the natives might be right about the bad luck thing
04:06Please! Being a man of science, I refuse to be taken in by primitive superstition
04:14The fact that it is now raining only on me is pure coincidence, I assure you
04:23Freak happenstance! And besides, the lightning missed me by a good two feet
04:37I'm not saying I understand this Aoui Ghandi thing, Dr. Pinkney
04:43But you sure have been bitten by a lot of snakes and poisonous bugs since that little guy fastened himself to your head
04:49Not to mention the fact that you've been struck by lightning nine times
04:54For the last time, all of that is nothing but pure coincidence!
05:00Oh, right! I believe! I believe! Please get it off me!
05:11Let us continue our safari by searching for the extremely rare polka-dotted skink
05:18As pictured here
05:20Why don't we split up this time?
05:23Let's go away to you
05:30Whoa!
05:40Good! No one's watching! I can at least take credit for this one!
05:46You glory-hogging little canine! Give me that skink this instant!
05:53Aoui!
05:57Come quick, everyone! I found the skink! I found it all on my own!
06:04I take it you watched the whole exchange between myself and the dog?
06:09According to my emergency medical guide, the skink injects its victims with a toxin that affects the language centers of the brain
06:17Causing those bitten to speak in rhymes
06:20I'm feeling just a little foggy
06:23My, oh my, I hate this doggy!
06:42I tell you, Dr. Pinkney, being an animal buff and all, you must be in hog heaven
06:47First, Berkley found you that Aoui dandy thing you were looking for, not to mention that skink
06:52And tonight, he digs up that rare hat-back thing and a whole bag of nearly extinct pygmy pocket frogs
06:58Yay! Pocket frogs!
07:01You can't imagine how much I appreciate that
07:05Dr. Pinkney, to reduce the risk of you going into shock, perhaps you should spend the night in our modular condominium
07:12Oh, thank you! I think I'll just crawl into my nice cold tent, with the bat and the frogs, of course
07:21Maybe it would be best if we just left you alone right now
07:25Yes! Leave me alone!
07:31How can I upstage that dog and recover some small amount of professional dignity?
07:36I'd have to find the rarest of all rare animals
07:41The great white rainforest baboon!
07:44But how? How?
07:46Barkie, we gotta help Dr. Pinkney's field bedding, Berk
07:51I got a plan!
07:57Sorry, Dr. Pinkeye
08:01We need to borrow your sleepy bed
08:05Shh, shh, shh
08:09Good work, Barkie. Time to wake the doctor
08:16I must be having a nightmare
08:19Oh no, it's real
08:23What?
08:24It's sleepy bag stuffy
08:26Me and Barkie glue it all over your body while you were sleepy
08:30Why? To make you look just like the white baboon
08:33You like bait
08:34You'd better not let me...
08:38Bad dog!
08:45It... it's... it's the great white baboon!
08:50I found him! I found him!
08:54Quick, wake the cameraman!
08:56Not until you apologize to Barkie and say you're good dog
09:00Whatever! Good doggie, good doggie
09:07Now wake the cameraman!
09:13I found him all by myself!
09:16Finally, after all these years!
09:20Have a good time with your new friend, Dr. Pinknose
09:25Yes, after so many years of failure
09:28Dr. I. M. Pinkney was literally carried away by his dreams of making a rare discovery
09:34Next week on Nature's Oddities
09:36We'll profile a little dog with a peculiar knack for finding pocket frogs