Crayon Shin Chan EP4
anime,jdrama,cartoon
Category
πΉ
FunTranscript
00:001, 2, 3, 4!
00:04GTN!
00:08In my earliest memory, my cute plastic nose is being sewn on by a Chinese boy with bloody hands,
00:13telling me, life is nothing but pain.
00:16But I believed in my heart. He was wrong.
00:18Ah! Mom, look a bunny! And it's not real, so I can't kill it like Flopsy!
00:23Now, sweetie, you haven't even taken your aching-for-comfort widow Sally doll out of the box yet.
00:28But you're the one who wanted that!
00:30No means no, Penny.
00:32But last night I heard you say no to Daddy over and over, and then you were screaming, yes, yes!
00:37Oh, well, what do you say we buy you that rabbit?
00:41Yay! I didn't even have to cut myself!
00:47Uh-oh!
00:48The day I went home with Penny, I was sure the Chinese boy had it wrong.
00:52But then, the devil child appeared.
00:59Who wants to eat away their gloomies?
01:02I got this recipe from my new therapist. Why don't we split it down the middle and pig out?
01:09Who's there?
01:11Open up! It's the ass police!
01:13Oh, Christ, it's him!
01:15Identify yourself!
01:16You're talking to Penny's mom, Shin!
01:18Huh? What are you doing here? Does your husband know?
01:21I'm here because this is my home, and of course my husband knows.
01:26Oh, I thought this was Maso's house. I guess you're not in trouble.
01:30Well, that explains what he's doing here.
01:32Sorry, Shin! You've got the wrong house. Bye-bye!
01:35Well, since I'm here, is Penny home?
01:38Hey, your door's retarded! It doesn't open when I turn the knob.
01:42Wait there! I'll be right back!
01:44Why are your veins popping?
01:45That nasty ape child, Shin, is at the door. You don't want to play with him, do you?
01:49I don't know. Shin can be a pain.
01:52Reject him, Penny! Reject him!
01:54Well, I was looking forward to that dessert. Um, tell him I'm washing my hair!
01:59It does look tasty. Tell him I'm washing my rear.
02:03Damn you, backdoor! How dare you let that dirty little bastard in!
02:06If you swapped that dessert with a pile of snot, how long do you think it would take for people to notice?
02:10Uh...
02:11Bury him in the garden with philopathy.
02:14You know, Shin, I could always take you to Maso's place if you like.
02:17Uh, they wouldn't have let me in anyway. His parents say they would lose their homeowner's insurance.
02:22Why didn't I think of that excuse?
02:24Can I have soda with my snot cake?
02:26Why, of course, Shin.
02:28Spike it with rat poison. It won't take much. He's small.
02:35Here you go, sweetie. And here's a man-size piece just for you.
02:42Her piece looks a lot bigger than mine.
02:44They're all the same.
02:46Oh, really? Then I'll take this one.
02:48No! Stop!
02:53I've had better. I'd give it two stars.
02:56Penny, I think your mom's on drugs. That slice was much bigger than yours.
03:00Um, that's okay.
03:04Uh, Mommy?
03:08That's when I knew the Chinese boy was right.
03:11In a world of globalized exploitation, loss of meaning, and devils named Shin, happiness was simply impossible.
03:17No! Mommy!
03:19You look like foxy! I promised to take better care of him!
03:22They'll take you away!
03:23No longer am I the happiness bunny.
03:25Now and forever, I'm the bunny of misery and despair.
03:28Please kill me.
03:33Yo! Here's some more!
03:38A fistful of bunny!
03:41And that's why we only bring it up in election years.
03:45Okay, it's game time now.
03:47Today we'll pretend I'm queen of an empire and you'll live in my queendom.
03:51Wow! Can I be the trumpeter?
03:53They blow on their horns so majestically.
03:56Maybe some other time. Maso, today you're a eunuch.
03:59Could I be a popcorn salesman?
04:01Uh, I don't think queens need those.
04:03Why don't we make them our own?
04:05Could I be a popcorn salesman?
04:07Uh, I don't think queens need those.
04:09Why don't we make you my style consultant?
04:11I'll be the minister of war.
04:13My empire is a peaceful place.
04:15I know you can take care of my ponies, Georgie.
04:18I'll be the maker of boring games where you always get to be in charge.
04:21Oh no, Shin. The queen doesn't need someone like that.
04:24She's perfectly capable of making up her own boring game.
04:27Hey! My games aren't boring!
04:29Uh-huh, uh-huh.
04:30Good morning, common people.
04:32Oh, hello, I...
04:34I thought you all might be malnourished, so I brought you some gourmet snacks.
04:37We're busy right now.
04:39Chocolate's an i-fordici action.
04:41That sounds wonderful.
04:43Our live-in chef made them.
04:45Let's see what we've got.
04:46Crème brûlée, marzipan, and he made chocolate tartlets while I watched.
04:50He made a poop tart?
04:51It's a pastry, like a pop tart,
04:53but for wealthy folks instead of trailer trash.
04:56The aroma of melting cocoa veiled with chef's sweat,
04:59doesn't it make your palate tingle?
05:02I even brought my pearl-encrusted mini-bake oven
05:05so we can have them served warm and drizzled with caramel sauce so sweet
05:08it'd make an anorexic start eating again.
05:12Hide the range!
05:17Destroying my fantasy, I'll destroy you!
05:21Crème brûlée, I'll give you pain brûlée!
05:30All better now.
05:32Ding!
05:37Let's see, who's my friend today?
05:40Wash my T-shirts!
05:41Make me pancakes!
05:43Take it sideways!
05:44Just tell the neighbors you tripped and fell!
05:46Mom, I'm home!
05:48Aw, hello Penny.
05:50I'm so glad you're back.
05:52Did you have a wonderful day at school, my dear?
05:54Yes, stupendous.
05:56Glad to hear it.
05:57So glad.
05:59You know, it's very important you're happy.
06:01It's Mommy's daily choice to wake up a little messier.
06:06Penny, have you been making Mr. Bunny hurt?
06:09It quiets the gloomies.
06:11She's becoming just like me.
06:14Just like I became my mother.
06:16I must stop the cycle of rage.
06:20Listen to me carefully, Penny.
06:23You can't beat your bunny friend to a bruised and battered pulp anymore, okay?
06:26What? But why?
06:28Because it isn't healthy, sweetheart, and he didn't do anything wrong.
06:31Think of how you'd feel if Bunny was beating you.
06:35Ouchie.
06:36And I won't make you kick this addiction alone, honey.
06:39I'll stop too.
06:40We'll use these things like lonely women are meant to.
06:43How's that?
06:44As bed buddies, okay?
06:48Yeah, okay, Mommy.
06:50I want a change.
06:51Oh, Penny!
06:52Oh, Mommy!
06:53Penny!
06:54Mommy!
06:55Teach me to love again!
06:59Wow, all these for us?
07:01Think of them as the first cavities of the rest of our lives.
07:04Mm-hmm.
07:05Ah, to inner peace.
07:08It's coming for me! Help!
07:10Him.
07:12Hello, Shin!
07:14Those chocolate-covered rupees work?
07:16Help me!
07:17Gotcha!
07:18Hey, what's going on here?
07:20Oh, what are you doing in this little hovel?
07:22Hovel? This is my house!
07:24Oh, and I thought my closet was small.
07:28Oh, great. Devil Boy brought a friend.
07:31Scrabbleman, can you give me a hand here?
07:33No violence, right?
07:35That's what we swore, dear.
07:37I thought you were too young to be your mother.
07:40Why, thank you.
07:42I did get knocked up at an early age.
07:44That sounds good.
07:45I'm thinking of getting knocked up myself.
07:47You get out of school for that, right?
07:48Nobody said you could stay, Shin!
07:50If you don't mind, I would like to see your hovel, ma'am.
07:53It's not a hovel!
07:55Oh, are those more desserts?
07:57Or that silicone Mom always talks about?
07:59Don't you touch those!
08:00But, it's not my fault. I have to feed my hunger.
08:03I'd like to feed your hunger some ground glass.
08:06Oh, mochi cakes!
08:08We wake our chef up every morning at four o'clock
08:10to prepare five dozen of these for the servants' quarters.
08:13He makes five dozen every day?
08:15Uh-huh. My mom likes to throw the extras out in front of the homeless.
08:21What are you doing, Penny? Stop! Fight the urge!
08:25One hit!
08:26No, Penny. One hit and you'll be back off the wagon.
08:29But, I need it!
08:31I know how you feel, honey.
08:33I want to make them hurt as much as you do,
08:35but we made a promise to each other.
08:37But, the shake!
08:38They'll stop in a few weeks. Believe me.
08:41Oh, Mommy!
08:42Oh, Penny!
08:43It's a whole new world!
08:46Let's go show him he's happy!
08:55I can't wait to poop that.
08:57Not terrible.
08:58I've had worse, like when our chef had that stroke.
09:03And this tea tastes like the water after I've had a mineral bath.
09:07You know, my daddy has a hundred acre tea garden in Siamission.
09:11You should come see it sometime and find out what actual quality tastes like.
09:14Yeah, I know.
09:20It looks like the house is falling down.
09:22What do you expect? It's a hobble.
09:33Curious Georgie goes to the zoo.
09:37No.
09:38You think that's bad? His secretary isn't even a woman.
09:41That explains the mustache.
09:44Yo!
09:45Hey, Georgie, what's up?
09:47What are you doing here?
09:49What are you doing here?
09:50Think way back to earlier this morning.
09:53You mean when I ate that paste?
09:55You invited me.
09:57Doesn't sound like something I'd do.
10:04I think I just dropped a weight glass.
10:07Oh, hey.
10:08Hey, wanna play CSI crime scene investigators?
10:12Last one to the basement is the dead hooker!
10:15Hold on, this place is a disaster area!
10:19If you make a mess, you have to clean it up.
10:21Unless you can afford domestic help, of course.
10:24This would not look good if she woke up right now.
10:30There. Consuela'd be so proud.
10:35Uh, greetings.
10:45Oh, I don't know.
10:46Helping the needy doesn't exactly sit well with me.
10:53Alright.
10:59What's wrong?
11:08Oh, I get it.
11:09You're as helpless as a welfare mom.
11:13No problem.
11:14Wow, I guess food stamps go pretty far these days.
11:20Oh, it's for me?
11:21Thanks. I love fake juice.
11:26Greedy little trash monkey.
11:28She's no different from her stupid brother.
11:31And that is how housing projects are made.
11:36Maintenance? Zero dollars.
11:37Profiting from low-income families? Priceless.
11:44All those rent checks!
11:49Oh no, I didn't mean to scare you.
11:51It's okay. Don't cry, Hima. We'll rebuild.
11:58Come on.
12:02I know what you want.
12:08Look, I'm Jin. My ass is hanging out.
12:10Does that make you happy?
12:11Yeah, you like that?
12:15Look at me, everybody! I'm Jin the Idiot!
12:17My brains are in my ass!
12:19Look at me!
12:25Look at me! I'm having my ass entertained!
12:27Laugh, baby, laugh!
12:29Oh, does he do this all the time?
12:32I'm Jin! I'm Jin! I'm Jin!
12:43He fell asleep in the middle of playing with me.
12:45Now I know why you get so mad at Dad.
12:47Jin!
12:55I think your sister has her first crush.
13:02I think your sister has her first crush.
13:08Action Bastard busts a move!
13:12And now, back to the explosive conclusion of...
13:15Action Bastard vs. The Kung Fuji Apple!
13:18Action Bastard! Bastard Beeb!
13:25No way! Nothing penetrates my rotten-to-the-core apple-speaker clench!
13:31Action Bastard, hold on!
13:34I would have come sooner, but his henchmen invited me into their anti-gravity chamber.
13:38Here!
13:40What? Oh, my God! Are these actual good translations for this show?
13:43No, it's the Action Bastard Fighting Guide, in stores now!
13:46Oh, that'll work, too.
13:48Right, baby, right. Left, baby, left.
13:50Now slide, slide, slide, slide.
13:54Right, baby, right. Left, baby, left.
13:57And now slide, and slide.
14:00Now dip, baby, dip, dip, baby, dip. Come on.
14:02Still got it!
14:04Action Bastard Fruit and Vegetable Peeler!
14:10Son of a red delicious bitch!
14:24Awesome! Triumph in laughter?
14:31The day's saved, my little friends, but now Action Bastard needs your help.
14:36Action Bastard needs a new finishing move, and our burnt-out riders have no more ideas.
14:40So we want you, our faithful fans, to send in your own attacks.
14:43I'm gonna use this winning move in a special future episode to prevent a nuclear war.
14:47So grab your parents' cameras and show us what you've got.
14:50And remember, we assume no responsibility for any deaths or injuries that may occur.
14:53If the world ends now, it'll be your fault!
15:01Kamehameha, bastard!
15:05Action Bastard Go-Go Groin Kick!
15:07Mine was way more bastard-y than yours!
15:09Ah, look at all those suckers.
15:11What's everybody getting so worked up about?
15:13The Action Bastard contest. Marketing at its best.
15:16It's the kind of kiddie manipulation that puts cigarette companies to shame.
15:19How do you know about the contest, Georgie?
15:22You said Action Bastard is for dumb kids who need escapist entertainment to try and forget about their miserable lives.
15:28I only saw it once at my cousin's house. I don't watch that stupid tripe.
15:31Right.
15:33Yes, that is right.
15:34Actually, guys, I've been working on a pretty neat attack.
15:37Action Bastard Grave Spawn Fist Kick!
15:44Kinda gay, Maso.
15:46Super gay.
15:47Way gay.
15:48I worked so hard.
15:50Do you send in a drawing? Cause the shrink keeps mine.
15:53You show your camera and it remembers.
15:56Then let's go to my house. Mom has a camera.
15:58She records her hurties.
16:06Then I'll sit on this side of the happy cake and Penny will sit right there and smile.
16:10We'll have so much fun I won't have to smack the bunny today.
16:15You don't have to ring the bell, sweetie.
16:17Told you.
16:19You just gotta know how to open it.
16:21You're smart.
16:22Smart means pay.
16:23I'm not really with them.
16:24Four guests?
16:27What are all these kids doing here?
16:29Videotaping.
16:35I can smell bunny stuffing.
16:37Um, no you don't.
16:38I just smell something sweet.
16:41Cakey cakey.
16:47It has Maso's soul.
16:49Okay, think Chuck Norris.
16:51Yeah.
16:52Ready? And action!
16:54Action bastard super savage fish cake!
16:57Cut, cut, cut.
16:59That's the same lame move as before.
17:01No it isn't. On the playground I did this.
17:03Action bastard graceful fish cake!
17:07And this time it's action bastard super savage fish cake!
17:12It's still the same thing.
17:14Same stupid smelly foot in the air.
17:16Cripes.
17:17But it is different.
17:18With the graceful kick you do this.
17:20Savage kick!
17:22Your toes come together like a karate chop.
17:24Well whatever, it's still lame.
17:26Super lame.
17:27Way lame.
17:32Why is he just standing there?
17:34Maybe he's dead.
17:35Wait, look his nostrils.
17:38Action bastard super snot yo-yos!
17:46That's so wrong.
17:47It's original but not really action bastard style.
17:53How do you know his style if you don't watch it?
17:55Shouldn't you be making a joke about butts or something?
17:58Maybe.
18:01Behold! Action bastard bastard alien ass dancer!
18:06Co-starring...
18:07Mr. Elephant and his incredible thigh slapping drunk attack!
18:11The elephant always lies.
18:13Excuse me.
18:16Yo lady, have anything sweet to eat?
18:18Don't you have your own mother?
18:20I have a strict curfew.
18:21I'm locked out until six.
18:27Can you overdose on sugar?
18:29I don't know, Shin.
18:30Why don't you try it?
18:31Okay.
18:32Will you turn me on my side if I start puking cake?
18:37Not too shabby.
18:38Toots might want to try a mix next time though.
18:46I knew what was coming.
18:48Nothing could stop it now.
18:50So Penny, why don't you film me doing an action bastard move?
18:55Of course we all know I'm above this sort of thing.
18:57I don't really need to win any stupid cartoon contest
19:00to assert myself over the rest of you peons.
19:03Yeah, whatever, Georgie.
19:06Hey, where's my camera?
19:10Jennifer!
19:11Where's my camera?
19:15Damn you, child from hell!
19:17I hate you!
19:19All men are bastards!
19:21Get your hands off my happy cake!
19:26I welcome death.
19:27I yearn for it.
19:29I dream of it every night.
19:31Am I never to feel its cold, dark embrace?
19:35Oh...
19:39And now, back to the explosive conclusion of
19:41Action Bastard vs. Beta-Carotene!
19:44Action Bastard Fruit and Vegetable Peeler!
19:48Dream on, bastard!
19:49Beta-Carotene, road of all evil, peeler avoider!
19:52Peeler avoider!
20:03Looks like I've got you by the short roots now, bastard boy!
20:06Action Bastard, I've got your new move!
20:09It's a smorgasbord of mindless violence!
20:14It's perfect.
20:23Action Bastard!
20:24All men are bastards!
20:26Get your hands off my happy cake!
20:34Congratulations to Shin Noharo, cascadet!
20:38Mommy, if you need to make a little trip to the bunny closet,
20:42I understand completely.
20:44Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
20:50Yo, time to go!
20:57Woke up late this morning, a storm was really rolling.
21:00Frogs and dogs are raining from the sky.
21:03Everything seems awkward to me, nothing's just as it should be.
21:07If this keeps on, I'm sure I won't get by!
21:10But then I close my eyes and try to smile.
21:13I know things are bad and getting worse,
21:16but after all this, I can rest awhile.
21:20And then I'll party, party!
21:22Party, party, join us, join us!
21:24Party, party, join us, join us!
21:25Party, party, join us, join us!
21:27Shake your day away and you can party, party, join us, join us!
21:30Party, party, join us, join us!
21:32Party, party, join us, join us!
21:33Shake your blues away!
21:38Yo, break-a-vacation, mom!
21:41This party's shaking and it ain't just shaking here.
21:44I see that smile grinning ear to ear.
21:47Sing this song and you should really sing it clear.
21:50Just sing along with us!
21:55Party, party, join us, join us!
21:57Party, party, join us, join us!
21:58Party, party, join us, join us!
22:00Shake your day away and you can party, party!
22:03Oh, I'm there for two!
22:05Party!
22:06Yeah, no party it is!
22:08Party, party!
22:10Hey!