Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00We are beautiful, unemployed, in the labor force of years, with a life sentence and a salary of unpaid salaries.
00:11This is all our wealth, in the hands of the heart of the two, capital at the beginning, with which we will conquer the whole world.
00:22We will conquer the whole third world.
00:26We will conquer the whole third world.
00:51What do you want?
01:00Let's drink coffee.
01:03Cappuccino, Americano, organic?
01:05That's it.
01:08I can't function without coffee.
01:10I can't sleep without coffee.
01:12I drink coffee even in my sleep.
01:14I'm drunk, I go to the kitchen, make myself a coffee, drink it and go back to bed.
01:19You don't brush your teeth?
01:20In this one, only case, no.
01:23I feel sorry for this settlement.
01:25You drink coffee?
01:26It's going to be shit soon.
01:28Why are you putting it away?
01:31On the first day at work, you make a mess.
01:33I want you to have a good time, luxuriously.
01:36What work?
01:37What work?
01:38We're all old.
01:40Do you know what's the worst?
01:41Look at them.
01:42They're all younger than us.
01:44I feel like a leader in the primary school.
01:46Everyone can spit on you, but you can't do anything about it.
01:49Quiet, grandpa.
01:50He's coming.
01:51Who?
01:52Boss.
01:54Quiet, boss is coming.
01:57I know you.
02:05Are we on duty here?
02:07You?
02:09Of course.
02:11Welcome on board.
02:13We respect every employee.
02:16Even such a terribly old one.
02:20This boss is terribly young, isn't he?
02:22I wonder if he can even tie his shoelaces.
02:25Informatic genius.
02:27For him, I could be the only gay person in the world.
02:31Really?
02:32Is he good at computers?
02:34No, he's just pretty.
02:36Did you know that Steve Jobs wore the same clothes all the time?
02:40He doesn't even change his clothes.
02:42Who is this Steve Jobs?
02:47He's definitely there.
02:48For sure.
02:51I told you he's a chicken.
02:53Even yours.
02:54He's not.
02:55Hey, you.
02:56Dude.
02:57Can't you see that this basket is leaking?
02:59Take it out.
03:01Where is it leaking?
03:04Ask Steve Jobs.
03:09Sorry.
03:13Mail!
03:16Isn't it too dark in here?
03:18Do I have to turn on the light?
03:19Clean the window, cat.
03:22Junior cat.
03:25There's no water.
03:26Where?
03:27Where, where?
03:28In the desert.
03:29There's no water here.
03:30Change the bathtub.
03:33Damn.
03:40Hey, look.
03:43The guy is working on his laptop.
03:47Damn, I don't understand these jokes.
03:49Water.
04:04The bastard is dead.
04:08I won't play with us like this.
04:10Quiet, or it will be even worse.
04:14Maybe we should do it the right way.
04:15Torture them, or what?
04:16No, no, no, no.
04:18We have to tear their faces off,
04:19until they squeeze their buttocks.
04:23I have an idea.
04:30Gentlemen.
04:33Do you know where Słonecznikowa is?
04:35The sex and entertainment center.
04:38See you.
04:49They won't come.
04:50They will.
04:51Let's be curious.
04:52What if they find out it's a trap?
04:54They're scumbags.
04:55They think they know everything about us.
04:57That we're old,
04:58that we don't understand this world,
04:59that we think in old categories.
05:01That's true.
05:02We'll always have black skin.
05:04They raised us like this,
05:05they can't do anything.
05:06Now we'll humiliate them.
05:08They'll pee,
05:09they'll throw up,
05:10they'll sleep with old women,
05:12we'll give them a show,
05:14and they won't enjoy it.
05:16What if they don't come?
05:18Then we'll eat it all,
05:19we'll pee, we'll throw up,
05:21we'll sleep with old women,
05:22we'll die under the rubble,
05:24like the captains of the Volodya village.
05:36Hello.
05:37I thought you wouldn't come.
05:38Come in.
05:39Come in, morons.
05:59Very nice.
06:00Listen.
06:01But before that,
06:04let's drink this first.
06:06We drank something like this in high school.
06:08Now there are no more high schools.
06:10Now there's a real village bimber
06:12from a guy from the village.
06:14One without teeth.
06:16And he doesn't have teeth,
06:17because he lost them
06:18from heroin.
06:21The whole village was like that.
06:22Heroin-ish.
06:23You'll see how it can destroy your life.
06:26Do you have a straw?
06:28Just a natural one.
06:29No plastic.
06:30No, no, no.
06:31You drink it without a straw,
06:32in the air.
06:33Is it possible?
06:35Ecologically?
06:36Yes.
06:37And what's next?
06:39Cucumbers for vodka.
06:42We have an essential companion.
06:44Right?
06:45Adventure,
06:46a friend of humor.
06:49Here you go.
06:50You too?
06:51Yes.
06:52So what?
06:53To intergenerational integration.
06:55To health.
06:56And to your mouth
06:57in the body of the destroyer.
06:58What?
06:59To health!
07:01Mmm.
07:04So what, my dears?
07:05Muzynia?
07:06Of course it's Muzynia!
07:30Bonsoir.
07:31Bonsoir, bonsoir, bonsoir.
07:32Bonsoir, bonsoir, bonsoir, bonsoir, bonsoir.
07:38Excuse me.
07:42Is this vodka by any chance?
07:43No!
07:44It's a beamer!
07:45A king of the night.
07:46To health!
07:49Straight through the air!
07:51To your health!
07:52Right!
07:53Oh
08:23Guitar
08:40Pamiętaj on those no kiyote pory
08:42There was a balina not supposed to be as much as I got was one. Yeah. Yes, but the final poultry on top of that
08:48We did our sled was young she's a stand-alone. I don't trust you. Yes, you may see me. I've got you
08:52Oh, yeah, I'm sure ponder. I'll be in zdjęci wrzucę na tego ich sałego pentagrama. Tak to jest jak się zadziela ze starą gwardią
09:05Super intreza
09:06Najlepsza normalnie jak z tych ze skandynawskich filmów jeszcze te panie
09:12Oh, yeah, it's ninja zrobiłem to ja z nią razem śpiewamy karaoke to ja z nią opowiadamy sobie wiesz najgłębsze sekrety
09:19A to ja z nią wspólnie wymiotujemy tego nie pamiętam
09:24To zawsze jest tak samo
09:26smutna piątkowa bibka dreamy za 40 zeta
09:30A wy w ogóle się nie przejmowali się że to było wiejskie i kiczo wata
09:35totalnie w ogóle
09:41I
09:51Don't like possible here
09:59Then the whole way to the pier is a tree lot of dinkowanie dzięki tobie i tej siłowej panie straciłem dzielictwo
10:07W
10:09Tzik to ja dziękuję bo może do mnie kontakt
10:14Nie właśnie ona nie ma telefonu ale spoko wiem gdzie mieszka
10:26To my poprosimy to samo 45 złotych
10:3045 złotych za dwie kawy a mają być dwie to 90 ile
10:35Chyba się normalnie dobrze dobrze to poprosimy od do stolika chodź
10:44To postawiasz chyba cię normalnie pogięło za dwie kawy 90 po to dostałem
10:54Po to dostaliśmy podwyżkę żeby teraz wydawać farszne głupoty
10:58Taka jest cena bycia w młodym miejscu rozumiesz bycia młodym
11:0190 tak dziękuję
11:05To proszę bardzo
11:12Słodzisz kawę zwykłym cukrem
11:15To są
11:17po pierwsze tej kawy się nie słodzi
11:19po drugie cukier to trucizna
11:22po trzecie w ten sposób wspierasz tradycję niewolnictwa
11:28Pati a
11:29mogłabyś nam powiedzieć co robimy źle
11:33Albo czego nie robimy a powinniśmy żeby było fajnie
11:37Zacznijmy od tego że w ogóle jak widzę nie jecie awokado
11:43No nie jemy
11:49Czyli podsumowując
11:52Największym złem jest biały mężczyzna biały heteroseksualny mężczyzna
11:59Macica należy do
12:01siebie
12:02moje ciało mój wybór
12:04To sobie podkreślę bo to jest jednak dla mnie pewnie nową
12:09może dlatego że jestem biały
12:11i hetero
12:14W miarę
12:15Ta czy ta zależy czy chcesz mieć tego faceta na dłużej czy najkrócej ale kto powiedział że to jest facet
12:22Uh-huh
12:52To całkiem
13:04Nie mogę rozplątać a próbowałeś przeciąć to spróbuj
13:10Mówisz
13:18Widzisz gwidą to miasto
13:20Ci wszyscy ludzie pchają codziennie swoje małe kurki gnoju zamykają się w swoich małych mieszkankach na kredyt
13:26licząc na liczydła chile dzisiaj zarobili i czy jutro będzie je stać na najtańszego drinka przy najtańszej ulicy żeby coś jeszcze wpłacić na lokatę
13:35I zastanawiają się czy to dobry moment żeby zadzwonić do swoich matek i powiedzieć im że nie przyjadą do nich na święta bo nie mają czasu
13:42ale tak naprawdę ich nie chcę tylko boją się do tego przyznać
13:45to miasto to dżungla to ocean w którym takie rekiny jak my zjadają takie płotki jak oni
13:50płotki nie żyją w morzu
13:52to taka metafora są
13:54słodkowodne
13:55nie ma szans ich zjeść widziałeś te dzieciaki
13:58spijali każde słowo z moich ust byłem pianką na ich kawy tak pożarłeś ich
14:03Jak ja to awokado
14:06Ale teraz czas na grubszą rybę
14:08No siema mordy jeszcze tu jesteście
14:10Ej widon idzie z nami na magabibę
14:13będzie silent disco
14:22Ktoś musi pilnować tego bajzlu
14:25Chodź
14:27Foreign
14:57Stary
15:27Foreign
15:57I ate an avocado.
16:00Drug addicts need to be healthy and smart.
16:05Or you'll end up like them.
16:07And what are you? Glamour and fancy?
16:13The boss is doing a merger with a big corporation.
16:16Thanks to me.
16:18I want to relax and hire me as my CEO.
16:22Who?
16:23In Polish, CEO.
16:25Do you know what that means?
16:26I've never heard of it.
16:29CEO.
16:30The boss of all bosses.
16:33You're the best in this industry, but we know
16:35that you don't want to work with us
16:37and sell us your priceless assets.
16:46No, I'm a cool guy.
16:48I'd love to sell you a company.
16:50Are you sure?
16:51Why?
16:52It's a business.
16:54I want to make as much money as possible.
16:56If we don't work together, we'll all lose.
16:59I call it the avocado method.
17:03The bigger the seed, the smaller the avocado.
17:10Your CEO makes sense.
17:13But we had the impression that you wanted to be independent.
17:18That you wouldn't sell yourself to anyone.
17:20Especially to old people.
17:22It turned out that maybe old age isn't that bad.
17:28I want to get old.
17:30Be happy.
17:32Me too.
17:33But without getting old.
17:38Thank you, boss, for a great job.
17:40We're here thanks to you.
17:42Now you can devote yourself to your true passion.
17:52Oh, so you're not my employees anymore.
17:57But it won't affect my deadlines.
17:59I have a lot of deadlines.
18:01Shut up.
18:02So?
18:03Thank you, Romek.
18:05Thank you, boss.
18:07I've never been a CEO.
18:15Thank you too.
18:17You bald drunkard.
18:18What are you doing here?
18:19What do you mean?
18:20I'm taking over this company.
18:21Thanks, Romek.
18:22The young man was stubborn.
18:23He kept talking about his integrity or something like that.
18:27Weird things.
18:28And you, boom, he agreed right away.
18:31So I'll fire you all.
18:33What?
18:34The cherry is already ripe, you bastard.
18:36Oh, oh, oh.
18:37The boss too.
18:38There was a shortcut with surprisingly thick printing.
18:42But Romek, of course, doesn't read.
18:44I'm taking over this company.
18:46I'll set up an office in this office in Rotkarnie.
18:48Best regards.
18:52And my deadlines?
18:53I have deadlines.
18:54Shut up, drug addict.
19:01Don't worry, kids.
19:02There's life outside of KORP too.
19:04Actually, it's only there.
19:05Go somewhere on vacation, I don't know,
19:07some skis, sleds, skis, tent.
19:12But I don't have a vacation anymore.
19:14What do you mean, you don't?
19:15You've only had a vacation so far.
19:16Call your grandma, find out if she's alive.
19:18Damn, I actually don't know.
19:21I have a name, but it's hard to tell my family.
19:24You're too young for a suit and a jacket.
19:26People hide in suits, don't they?
19:28Boss, can you handle it?
19:30All my life ahead of me.
19:31I'm finally learning how to tie shoes.
19:34And since we're planning a wedding with Renata,
19:36we should also plan a wedding trip.
19:39And Renata wants the whole world.
19:42The whole world?
19:45Fido, what are you doing there? Come here.
19:47I have three more projects.
19:48That's it, you don't have to.
19:54Boss, what were we actually doing?
19:57What were we doing?
20:00Rebranding the Freemarket franchise
20:02with a synergetic correlation.
20:04What?
20:05Meaning?
20:06Meaning nothing.
20:13I will never sell this franchise.
20:15All those monkeys, ponies, kitties, I don't know.
20:17This is my shop and that's it.
20:19I will be independent.
20:21I would buy this coffee for 1.30 PLN per kilogram.
20:24You can take it.
20:29Aroma.
20:30I'm a boss myself and I treat myself like garbage.
20:33But at least I have someone to show off to.
20:35Not bad.
20:36I would buy this.
20:39A souvenir.
20:42No, all the avocados are rotten to throw away.
20:45And why do I order this shit when no one takes it?
20:48Jesus, woman, what kind of shopping are you doing?
20:50Are you stupid?
20:52Good morning.
20:53We are stupid, of course.
21:42THE END