• 4 hours ago

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😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00A lot of people are forgetting that we are playing a game.
00:07It's too much, like, I feel that I'm getting sucked into things
00:11that I was so confident that I wouldn't get sucked into.
00:14The rule regarding the discussion of nominations
00:18has been broken yet again.
00:21I don't want to be punished anymore.
00:24Stop talking about nominations,
00:26because now we've got no hot water.
00:28Stop talking about nominations, because now we've got no hot water...
00:31again.
00:40This won't be easy,
00:43but with your sweat, elbow grease and filthy hard work,
00:48I know we can get the job done!
00:51You don't trust the people there, so you throw the food.
00:54He annoys me, I can't lie. He really gets on my tits.
00:57Have you told people I was annoyed about...
00:59No, I didn't say you were annoyed.
01:05Citizens of the Big Brother House,
01:09today is a big day for our great nation.
01:15Do you like it? No.
01:28THEME SONG PLAYS
01:46Day 10, 11.10am.
01:51For this week's shop and task,
01:54the Big Brother House has been turned into Downing Street.
02:20THEME SONG CONTINUES
02:35Things can only get better.
02:38Sounds a bit ominous. Yeah.
02:40This is Big Brother.
02:42Can all housemates head to the living area immediately?
02:46Let's go, kids!
02:48Here we go.
02:51Oh!
02:55No way!
03:00Oh, that is funny!
03:03Very good.
03:09Is that a political song, Things Can Only Get Better?
03:12Yeah, it was Tony Blair's campaign song.
03:14Ah, no, it was not!
03:16Is Tony Blair the one who's Labour?
03:18Yeah, that's right.
03:20What's a Conservative song, then?
03:22Probably haven't got one, The Boring Basterds.
03:24Yeah.
03:25We love Waitrose.
03:27There he is! Haven't you been to 10 Downing Street?
03:30Many years ago, it was actually meant to be there this week.
03:33No, you weren't. I had to cancel it.
03:35It was really upsetting, but here it is.
03:38Good morning, and welcome to Big Brother News.
03:42Today's top story.
03:44Prime Minister Khaled is facing mounting pressure
03:47as the nation's luxury shopping budget hangs in the balance.
03:51The PM has called an emergency Cabinet meeting
03:54with his most trusted ministers, Emma, Dave and Nathan.
03:58Difficult decisions lie ahead
04:00as the government must manage the public purse
04:03and put their citizens to work
04:05to overcome the tough tasks in front of them.
04:08The stakes are high as the state of the nation must be improved
04:12and our citizens will be faced with another grim week
04:15of economy shopping.
04:17Big Brother will be watching closely as events unfold.
04:20Stay tuned for updates.
04:23CHEERING
04:26Woo! Woo!
04:28Yeah, you see it, Rob.
04:30That's hilarious.
04:32This is Big Brother.
04:34The government must now collect their suitable attire
04:37from the storeroom, get changed
04:40and make their way to the government Cabinet office.
04:43Well done, team.
04:48PM Khaled's Cabinet is made up of Emma, as Minister for Transport,
04:54Diz, the Minister for Energy,
04:57and Nathan, who is Minister for Agriculture.
05:03This wig is way too small.
05:05Oh, yeah!
05:07Like that, when she came on, yeah.
05:15We're going to have to make some very unpopular decisions, I feel.
05:18Oh, don't worry, I've got experience in that.
05:20THEY LAUGH
05:23SHUSHES
05:2912.46pm.
05:32Citizens Azaz and Thomas are plotting...
05:36Listen, listen, I'm going to have fun.
05:38Yeah, I'm going to have fun.
05:40They're being too serious and I can't do serious.
05:42I know, they're all stressed. I'm going to have fun.
05:44We're going to pass this out. I want to pass.
05:46I want to enjoy my day.
05:48We're going to have fun because this is too serious for me.
05:50I can't do it, bro.
05:52I can't stay all, like...
05:54Bro, I'm not going to sit there going,
05:56yeah, the world is shit! I can't do it.
05:58We're going to have fun. OK, cool.
06:00OK.
06:02The PM and his ministers are in the Cabinet office.
06:05This is Big Brother.
06:07As the Government, you are responsible for managing the country.
06:12Prime Minister, as you can see,
06:14the Government's budget is currently £100 million.
06:19That budget needs to be stretched over a series of tasks
06:23that your citizens will face over the next two days.
06:27They may have to suffer, the citizens, for the next little while.
06:30I think it's for the greater good.
06:32Would you agree?
06:34Excellent.
06:36Didn't listen to a word I said, did she?
06:38She was playing footy with me under the table.
06:40You're such a bloody tell-tale, aren't you?
06:43Yeah.
06:45Prime Minister Khaled, you and your Government
06:47must now make your first big budget decision.
06:51God.
06:53The nation's roads are covered in potholes.
06:56To improve the state of the nation,
06:58your citizen road workers must fix the road
07:01and fill in the potholes.
07:04As things stand, the road workers will have 60 minutes
07:07to fix the road with basic tools.
07:10Your budget options are
07:13You can spend half your total budget, £50 million,
07:17on better tools for the road workers to use.
07:20Or you can spend £30 million on closing the road for longer
07:24to give workers 30 minutes more to do their work.
07:28Or you can spend nothing.
07:31Is it immoral to beat them now?
07:33Yeah, I think it would be a grave mistake to spend half
07:36or even a third of the budget, like, on the first task.
07:39OK, so are we all in agreement?
07:41Government, do you wish to spend any of your budget
07:45on the road work task?
07:47No. No.
07:49Not a penny, sweetheart.
07:51No. Give them nothing.
07:592.05pm.
08:01The citizens have gathered for the first address from the Cabinet.
08:08Oh!
08:10Oh, my God, it's Dave!
08:12Mummy!
08:14Yay!
08:16Not Boris Johnson!
08:18Boris!
08:19Well, have they made Dave look like Auntie?
08:21That's so bad.
08:23I want to read the mail.
08:25I love it.
08:27Dave, you look sick.
08:33Citizens of the Big Brother House,
08:35today is a big day for our great nation.
08:38As your Prime Minister, I am proud to unveil this government's plan
08:42to tackle the potholes plaguing our nation's roads.
08:46I'll let your Transport Minister, Emma, tell you more.
08:50CHEERING
08:52Yay!
08:56Thank you, Prime Minister.
08:58This is an issue dear to my heart.
09:02We need to make those awful potholes a thing of the past.
09:08To achieve that dream, I'm delighted to announce
09:12that our road workers will be...
09:15Oh, no.
09:17..Lily, Jeannie, Marcello,
09:20Ali and, of course, Bape Toto.
09:23CHEERING
09:29This won't be easy.
09:32But with your sweat, elbow grease and filthy hard work,
09:38I know we can get the job done!
09:41CHEERING
09:43Emma! Emma! Emma!
09:46Emma! Emma! Emma!
09:50CHEERING
09:58Under the supervision of Transport Minister Emma,
10:02the road workers must repair the road
10:05by repainting markings and filling potholes.
10:09You must fill the mixer with 60 scoops of tarmac
10:14and eight litres of activator.
10:17You must then rotate the mixer ten times
10:23to ensure the mixture is ready for use.
10:26Let's go, team. We've got this, guys.
10:28For the luxury.
10:30Let's go. Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go.
10:40Oh, she's going so slow.
10:42Sweetheart, it's not the Picasso.
10:44Let's get the bloody paint on there.
10:47Fed clean line.
10:49No, no, this is not going to do.
10:51Do it yourself, then.
10:53Come on, sweet...
10:55Do not address the minister in such a fashion.
10:58Come on!
11:04Ten, ten spins.
11:06Mix it around with a shovel inside.
11:09You are such a backseat driver, do you know?
11:11A backseat everything, I swear to God.
11:15That's it, baked potato,
11:17but I think you need to pay more attention to your neatness
11:21and Ali needs to go a little bit quicker,
11:24so a little happy medium from both of you.
11:28That's it. Using tools only, not your hands.
11:31That's it. Don't be shy. Your mother wasn't.
11:34You're doing fantastic, my team.
11:37I can almost taste that smoked salmon.
11:41Yeah, think about the luxury shopping budget, Mandem.
11:45No, we must not play on the machinery.
11:48She's very disagreeable, this one.
11:51She's clearly a union leader, isn't she?
11:56Is this what road workers have to do?
11:58Yeah.
12:00Do you like it? No.
12:03Minister for Agriculture Nathan has come to the diary room.
12:08Emma is the Iron Lady.
12:10There will be no U-turn in sight as long as Emma is around,
12:14so, yeah, I think myself and Emma
12:17will be quite similar in our approach.
12:21Yeah, I think it was a role I was born to play.
12:24Boris Johnson, yeah, and I love a bit of power as well.
12:27Who doesn't?
12:28Nathan, what do you see in yourself
12:30that is similar to Boris Johnson?
12:32A bit of foolishness, I would say,
12:35is similar between myself and Boris Johnson,
12:37that we were potentially slightly mad
12:40and, clearly, we both love a party as well.
12:43We've both got great hair.
12:45That is another one.
12:50Well done, guys, well done, well done!
12:53Well done, Lily!
12:55I'm not going to lie, don't quit your day jobs.
12:57I can't believe people do that for a living.
13:05MUSIC PLAYS
13:193.46pm.
13:23Citizen Lily is delivering lunch to the Cabinet Office.
13:28Someone's struggling.
13:30Oh, look at Lily Burns.
13:32Service with a smile. Look at this delightful.
13:34Let me help you with that door.
13:36Should be, yeah.
13:37Come on, sweetheart.
13:39Oh, look at this.
13:41Oh, smoked salmon and cream cheese!
13:43Oh, stop it!
13:44There we go.
13:45Oh!
13:46Stood nice, didn't it?
13:47Yeah.
13:48Oh!
13:49Thank you very much.
13:50Thank you very much, it's very kind of you.
13:52Thank you, very kind.
13:53Thank you, Lily Burns.
13:54Thank you, George.
13:55Would you like to shake my hand, because I am famous,
13:57I'm a minister.
13:58It's nice to meet you.
13:59Nice to meet you too.
14:00It's nice to meet you.
14:01You can go home and tell your mother you met us all today,
14:03can't you?
14:04Nice to meet you.
14:05And the Prime Minister, you need to curtsy for him.
14:07Yeah, go on.
14:08A little...
14:09A little drop of the neat.
14:10Well done, well done.
14:11You know, we're very proud of you.
14:13You've done very well today.
14:14A little bit of a snot drip there, sweetheart.
14:16There we go.
14:17That's it.
14:18All right, sweetheart.
14:19There you go.
14:20Well done to you.
14:21Thank you, Lily.
14:22Bye, Lily.
14:23Bye-bye.
14:24Izzaz and Sarah are in the living area.
14:27Rishi?
14:28Rishi?
14:30Rishi?
14:31Stop taking our money and giving it to your wife.
14:34Yeah, Rishi!
14:35Your wife's a billionaire, mate.
14:37Stop making the pensioners pay more.
14:39They're going to freeze to death.
14:43Rishi, make house prices smaller
14:45so I can buy a house in a rural area.
14:48He's not our Prime Minister any more.
14:50He's not our Prime Minister any more.
14:53Could you just explain to me,
14:56as someone who considers himself a Tory,
14:59and what is a Tory's beliefs,
15:01if that is a...
15:02Whatever it...
15:03I'm just trying to understand.
15:05No, I get it, I get it.
15:06I'm a Tory at heart,
15:07and I would say Tories stand for a strong economy,
15:11wealth creation.
15:13I think also, in terms of immigration,
15:16I think it's important to talk about that.
15:18Yeah, I think immigration should be controlled
15:21in a way that is beneficial to both the country
15:24and other people that want to come,
15:26that need to come here.
15:27You know when you say quality of control,
15:29does that mean just more calculated assessments
15:32of people when they come here?
15:33Yeah, that's right. Yeah, absolutely.
15:34Who are we to pass judgement
15:36on the benefit that one brings to this economy?
15:39In, like, certain, you know, systems,
15:41it matters on degrees,
15:42it matters on all these kind of things.
15:44So you end up just bringing in a bunch of rich people,
15:46but where are you going to get the labour force from?
15:49Exactly, and that's where it's kind of like...
15:51I really like that.
15:52Who decides those categories of who is valuable here?
15:55That's a fantastic point.
15:56And that's just a luck of the draw thing.
15:58Yeah, it is.
15:59Like, we're just lucky that we were born particularly here.
16:01We're lucky, yeah, exactly.
16:02Like I say, I was so lucky to be able to be brought here.
16:04I could be another kid on the TV that you see,
16:06like, dying in Lebanon or Palestine.
16:08And, like, if you see the wars in Lebanon right now,
16:10it's fucking... it's tragic.
16:11And my grandma, we just had to get her out the other week
16:13just before I came in here.
16:14If we didn't, I wasn't going to come on this.
16:16That is my... that's my heart, that's my everything,
16:18like, my family and my friends and shit.
16:20I moved house every two months.
16:22So until I was 14 years old,
16:24I didn't have a friend for longer than a year.
16:26So that was... I got so used to,
16:28Hi, I'm Khaled. Hi, I'm Khaled. Hi, I'm Khaled.
16:394.39pm.
16:41The Cabinet ministers are returning from lunch.
16:45Hello, thank you.
16:46You're most welcome.
16:48Is there a spicy chicken one left?
16:50No, it's halloumi left.
16:51Oh, halloumi! No, don't touch it.
16:53Oh, that smells bloody gorgeous.
16:55Halloumi!
16:56Can I eat the halloumi one?
16:58No. Can we eat it?
17:00I'm throwing it in the bin. Get it away.
17:02I'm throwing it in the bin. No!
17:04In the bin. We can't eat it, it's got to go in the bin.
17:06Can we... We're not allowed to eat them.
17:08I wouldn't even have brought them in here.
17:10No, it's bad, but it's got to go in the bin.
17:12We're not failing this bullshit. Yeah, well done.
17:14No. No, good decision, good decision.
17:16Why? Why did you put that in the bin?
17:18I should have just went in the...
17:20Why did it go in the bin? Cos we're not allowed to eat it.
17:22Because we can't eat it anyway.
17:24I didn't just fucking play on the roads for no reason.
17:26He's right, he's right, he's right.
17:28It's a good decision.
17:29They'll have a luxury butchers.
17:31It wasn't our food to throw.
17:33All right, man, I'll miss it.
17:35I've made the right decision, here we are.
17:39What a waste of a bagel, man.
17:41No, I do agree.
17:43To me, I've always been... I just hate wasting food, period.
17:47Nathan, how do you even become a Prime Minister?
17:50You just become a politician, then you become very...
17:53How do you become a politician? You get elected.
17:56So, you know when you see the people vote for this and vote for that
17:59and you get them knocking on your door and they want to talk to you?
18:02So, you become the person who represents your town.
18:07So, could anyone be a Prime Minister?
18:09Yeah, you could be a car. You could run.
18:12But you'd have to get elected. Yes.
18:14I could literally be a Prime Minister. You could.
18:18I thought you just had to be clever,
18:20and, like, part of the Secret Service.
18:22I didn't know, like, I could be a Prime Minister.
18:25If that's in the fridge, someone's going to eat that
18:27cos there is no food in this house.
18:29It's two halves of a bagel. Wait, what happened?
18:31They brought the food in, there wasn't a bagel left, yeah?
18:33And then people ran over to it and I threw it in the bin.
18:35Good man.
18:36Anything that goes against the tasks today,
18:38like I said to even those, we need to understand
18:41and actually eat and go for the next week. Yeah.
18:43Let's have a bit of fun, right? Let's enjoy it,
18:45but make sure we fucking do it good.
18:47I did what I did and I stand by it, man.
18:49I'm not... For all of us, that's for all of us.
18:51I did the same as you. That's not just for me.
18:53You would have done the same. I'm glad you did, though.
18:55I told you, last week, I said, if I'm ever doing a task...
18:58Yeah. We're doing it. I'm not going home.
19:00That's the type of shit you lose over, bro.
19:02Well done. Well done, everyone, well done.
19:05SHUSHING
19:125.40pm.
19:14Dears, Ali and Lily are talking about the upcoming eviction.
19:19I hope not only one of us goes.
19:21I'm worried for you, cos I know you're going to be in here till the end.
19:24They might not like it in here, but you are going to be so loved out there.
19:28No, no. The thing is, I don't have much confidence in myself.
19:32You really, really, really, and I'm not just saying this,
19:36you could win this. Yeah.
19:38So, if you stay in the house without us,
19:41you have to not get down when people piss you off. Yeah.
19:45You've got to give your all to tasks.
19:47You've got to stay confident.
19:49If you feel isolated, just walk up and just think it's because
19:53you're too interesting to be with them.
19:55But, as well, if I'm not there...
19:58..if I'm not there...
20:01..and yous make it to the end...
20:04..let's all hang out after. Yeah, of course.
20:08Did you get pissed off with me for throwing the bagel?
20:11I mean, for me, it was just the fact of, like, throwing food when...
20:14Yeah, like, I never want to throw food, I don't want to waste it.
20:17No, no, and I get where you're fully coming from, and I get it,
20:20but, obviously, my point of view is I would never throw it.
20:22Yeah, no, that's fine. Do you know what I mean? Yeah.
20:24And the fact that, obviously, when it was thrown,
20:26I looked at Emma and she goes, why was that thrown?
20:28And I was just like, don't think it should have been thrown,
20:30I think it should have been put in the fridge, but that's just me.
20:33Yeah. But why do you think it should have been put in the fridge?
20:35For us. If you wanted it later. For us.
20:38Yeah, cos Emma said, why was that thrown?
20:40I don't think it needs an answer.
20:42That's the thing is, things do need answers, bro.
20:44I'm not going to, like, you're very...
20:47You're so neutral sometimes that not having an answer
20:50is the wrong answer, you know what I mean?
20:52No, no, no, no, fine. Sometimes we do have to say that.
20:54No, no, no, but fine, it's in the bin.
20:56However, it would have made a difference if it was in the fridge.
20:58It could have. He's removed the potential for someone to eat it,
21:01rather than someone not eating it or eating it.
21:03So, technically, you're saying you just don't trust it, so you throw it.
21:06You don't trust the people there, so you throw the food.
21:09One second, Iz.
21:10What you're saying is, now you're saying it's a trust thing, right?
21:13Yeah. When it was thrown, I looked at Emma and she goes,
21:15why was that thrown? Regardless of it,
21:17I saw someone who was upset by that bagel being thrown.
21:19My obvious valid reaction would be, why was that thrown in the bin?
21:23The person brought it in. Does that make sense?
21:25Can I say something? Is this worth it, like, at all?
21:28In the grand scheme of what we're trying to achieve...
21:30Which is fine. I haven't sit here saying,
21:32Dean's in the wrong for throwing it in the bin.
21:34I said, there's no right or wrong to what the bagel had to do with anything.
21:38But I don't want to have, like, anything with you over a bagel, bro.
21:42Yeah. Not over a bagel, boys.
21:44No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
21:47BUZZER
21:526.44pm.
21:55Government, you must now make your next budget decision.
22:00Ooh.
22:02Your manifesto pledged that hitting net zero would be a top priority.
22:09Oh, give it a rest. Beat me up, Scotty.
22:11I can't wait to put wind turbines on your shoreline.
22:14LAUGHTER
22:16Like a Bond villain.
22:19To improve the state of the nation,
22:21you must deliver on your promise by generating clean energy.
22:26To do this, one citizen energy worker must use their own wind power
22:32to blow a field of mini wind turbines.
22:36Oh, my God.
22:38To pass the task, the worker must huff and puff
22:41to keep the wind turbines in motion for a total of 20 minutes.
22:45That's a long time, though. That's a really long time.
22:48Yeah, let's see what the budget's saying.
22:50At present, your worker will only have 30 minutes
22:53to meet the energy target and improve the state of the nation.
22:57This is dependent on one person's work ethic. Exactly.
23:00However, you have the option to pay £10 million
23:03for ten extra minutes of shift time to meet the ambitious quota.
23:08Which is, yeah... Ten minutes for £10 million? Yeah.
23:11It's only 10% of our budget. The other ones are so much higher.
23:14And this one, I feel like we could guarantee it for £10 million.
23:17That's the guarantee we're buying. Yes, this guarantees it.
23:20I go with my gut feeling to invest that £10 million.
23:23OK.
23:26In the bedroom, Baked Potato is talking bagels.
23:31If it was me, honestly, I would have put it in the fridge. Thank you.
23:34But I would have been worried that someone would eat it
23:37during the task. I get that, I get that.
23:39So maybe it takes a risk out the way.
23:41It wouldn't have been me who'd done it. OK, fine.
23:43You're the little... Yeah, but it wouldn't have been me.
23:46He is, he's a shitstone. Whoever would have ate that bagel,
23:48it would have been on them, but they ate the bagel.
23:50You are up to no good today. I think it's the hat.
23:54You're naughty, naughty, it's the hat.
23:56I'm feeling Peaky Blinder today, that's why. Yeah, you are.
23:58Honestly, I'm just having a bit of fun.
24:00I know, no, it's fine. We know, we know.
24:02I think everyone else is getting wound up about it.
24:07BUZZER
24:147.14pm.
24:16Martha has been chosen to complete today's energy task.
24:21She has 40 minutes to create 20 minutes of clean energy
24:25by blowing on wind turbines.
24:28Martha, your time will start when the klaxon sounds.
24:32Right, I'm feeling strong, I'm feeling windy, I'm feeling powerful,
24:36I'm feeling like a boss-ass bitch.
24:38I'm going to smash it.
24:40Clean energy for all.
24:42Good luck. Thanks, big brother.
24:44Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.
24:56Look at her moving, look at her moving her body.
24:58She's like...
25:01Jesus.
25:03Does anyone actually do this for a living?
25:05Right, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.
25:07Come on, Martha. Come on, Martha.
25:09She's blowing too far away, she needs to go down further,
25:11so she's blowing it when she's doing it.
25:13I think she needs to, like, consistently get the rhythm going
25:17and then allow herself to stop when she really can't.
25:20HE BLOWS
25:23Bloody hell.
25:26Stop this for a laugh.
25:28Can I get up and go to the diary room? Yeah.
25:31Go there, it's not about how intense.
25:33Consistently. Consistency.
25:35And go down to go lower.
25:497.54pm.
25:51It's been 32 minutes since Martha started blowing
25:56on Big Brother's wind turbines.
25:59Oh!
26:01Oh!
26:03Oh!
26:05Wow, wow.
26:07Checky, checky, wow, wow.
26:09Slay, say, slay, climate change.
26:12Climate queen, climate lean.
26:14Slay, slay, slay, climate change.
26:17Yes! Yes!
26:19That's what I needed.
26:21She's doing bloody well here. I think she might just do it.
26:23Good job I didn't get this, cos my top lip's not working properly,
26:26cos of the Botox.
26:28Keep blowing.
26:31Keep blowing, keep blowing, keep blowing.
26:33I reckon she's on her 19th minute.
26:35Go on, Martha.
26:37Can you blow for England? I can.
26:40Go on, Martha, go on, Martha.
26:43It's climate change and we're fighting it.
26:45Go on, Martha, go on, Martha.
26:48It's time to slay, let's do it.
26:50Ten seconds. Yes!
26:52Nine, eight...
26:54Come on, Martha. ..seven, six,
26:57five, four,
26:59three, two, one.
27:02BUZZER
27:04Oh, my God.
27:06Well done, team. I'm all out of breath.
27:08Would you like to sit down, my love? Yeah.
27:11Oh, Martha!
27:14Oh, my God.
27:16Big brother, I thought blowing up balloons was hard.
27:19SHE GIGGLES
27:41It's 17pm.
27:44Some of the housemates are in the kitchen.
27:47Well, that's why I threw away the bagel.
27:50Started a drama with that.
27:52Apparently, I was annoyed about it.
27:54Yeah, apparently. But I wasn't.
27:56Yeah, apparently you was. Who said it?
27:58And I went... No, I went, um...
28:00I wasn't. Izzaz!
28:02You've been summoned, Izzy.
28:05What have I done?
28:06Why have you told people I was annoyed
28:08about him throwing the bagels away?
28:10No, I didn't say you were annoyed.
28:12I said I felt you were annoyed.
28:14Why did you think that when I didn't say,
28:16fuck all, to you about it?
28:18You said, why did he throw that in the bin?
28:20Yeah. Yeah, and I was just like,
28:22why didn't they put it in the fridge instead, that's all.
28:24No, but why did you...? It wasn't even a big thing.
28:26No, but why did you think I was annoyed?
28:28Because I thought you probably wanted it later, that's why.
28:30Why did you think that when I didn't say it?
28:32No, but you said... Have you been stirring, Izzy?
28:34No, I haven't, I haven't.
28:36How is...?
28:37I said, all I said is, why did he put it in the bin?
28:40Yeah, exactly. I wasn't annoyed.
28:42No, which is fine, but this is what I mean, I only said that,
28:44but then it obviously circulated somehow, that's all I said.
28:46Yeah. It wasn't me who went around saying it.
28:48OK. Because I only said it once, and that's it.
28:50Yeah. If I wanted to spread it, you'd know,
28:52cos I'd come say it to you, do you know what I mean?
28:54Yeah.
28:55Sarah is giving Marcello a massage.
28:58Oh!
29:01Is that actually not Sarah?
29:02Yes, that, that, that... That's mad, I know, I can hear it.
29:05Yeah, that's what it is.
29:07Quickly put the deodorant on as well.
29:11Sarah, you're a professional.
29:13Of course I am, this is what I do, darling.
29:15It's funny, they put masseuse in here,
29:17chef, barber...
29:21..Hannah.
29:22Oh, oh, oh!
29:25Izzaz has come to talk to Big Brother.
29:28Izzaz, how are you?
29:30I'm good, thank you. I think, like, obviously there's no coffee,
29:33and I am, like, starting to lose my mind a little bit
29:36because obviously we're sitting around a little bit as well, so...
29:40Yeah, good.
29:41A bit of a... Being a bit of a mischief as well, to be honest.
29:46What mischief have you been up to, Izzaz?
29:49Don't know if you've known, but it's about a bagel.
29:52Well, I can't, I can't stop laughing,
29:54cos it's actually mad how far it's gone.
29:57Emma, Emma brought a bagel from the Cabinet Room.
30:01Obviously it got binned because no-one wanted a fail
30:04in one of the tasks, but I thought genuinely Emma was upset about it,
30:08but obviously not.
30:10But then it's just spread around like wildfire,
30:13which is a bit weird.
30:15But then I'm just playing on it now and I'm being really annoying about it
30:18because it's been spreading, so...
30:20I'm just going to make people feel uncomfortable with it,
30:23because I can, and I will.
30:25And I'm having fun.
30:28So you and Izzaz all right, then, now that you've stopped being upset?
30:31Yeah, I was like, why did you say I was annoyed?
30:34Because you seemed annoyed.
30:36I said, but what gave you the impression that I was annoyed?
30:39Cos you said, why did Dean put it in the bin?
30:42I said, I was just asking a question.
30:44Cos he's a shit-stirrer. He is a shit-stirrer.
30:47He annoys me, I can't lie. He really fucking gets on my tits.
30:50Why?! Just with the things he comes out with.
30:53Like, he comes out with stupid shit all the time.
30:56But he's saying that he's shit-stirring,
30:58but he's not shit-stirring, it's just being annoying.
31:01Yeah, I don't get that whole thing, that I'm a shit-stirrer.
31:04He was saying, I'm going to be shit-stirring over the next few weeks.
31:07I'm a bit confused by that. I don't know what he means by it.
31:10He said he's been doing it all day. I went, what have you been doing?
31:13He went, just shit-stirring. I thought, I can't even be arsed.
31:16I was just like, all right, all right, great, that's great.
31:19Spanked how you don't know what to do with herself.
31:22I know, you're dying, cos he's gorgeous!
31:25He's gorgeous! I think he's sweet! Oh, he's lovely!
31:28I think he's quite sweet!
31:30No, he is quite sweet when he's asleep.
31:4010.18pm.
31:42This is Big Brother.
31:45Government, before you kick back for the evening,
31:49you have one final, very important decision to make.
31:53You must ensure the security of Downing Street after hours.
31:58To do this, you must have at least two citizens
32:02stationed outside of Downing Street as police guards overnight.
32:06Oh, no!
32:10The chosen housemates must guard number 10 all night long
32:14without falling asleep.
32:16Oh, that's a task and a half.
32:19Your budget decision is whether to spend £20 million
32:23to pay for one extra police officer,
32:26which will allow the police to rotate their shifts
32:29and take breaks for naps during the night.
32:31So, that would be three we'd have to pick and not two.
32:33Oh, dear me.
32:35So, who's for two to start?
32:37So, it's us, cos it's been shit-stirring.
32:39It has been, and I think that's a fair point.
32:41And I think it's payback.
32:43And then I think we need to pick the people
32:46that are more likely to stay awake.
32:48So, who's freshest in the morning?
32:50The top three that come to mind, unfortunately.
32:52Shegs, Izz and Tom.
32:54I would pick Tom and Izzaz if it's only two.
32:57I think Tom and Izzaz is a good show. Yeah.
32:59Now I feel like the debate is, do we get a third person?
33:01No, I don't think at all. No.
33:03Three people might all fall asleep as well.
33:05And it doesn't guarantee anything, so I think it's a complete waste of time.
33:08Prime Minister, this is decision time.
33:11Which two citizens have you chosen to guard Downing Street overnight?
33:16Tom and Izzaz.
33:18Will you spend your budget on an extra police officer?
33:26Prime Minister, I need to hear you.
33:29No.
33:31That's well bad.
33:33You bitch!
33:35You're all in it as well.
33:37I'm kidding.
33:38The decision has been made.
33:40Right, can we have some cake now?
33:43Can we have some cake now?
33:5310.22pm.
33:55Thomas and Izzaz are about to start their night shift.
34:01CHEERING
34:11Oh, you can't talk.
34:13By the way, you guys look really good.
34:15Your uniforms are perfect.
34:20Stand away!
34:22Get back!
34:24Fuck the police, no justice, no peace.
34:26No, don't wind up the policemen, come on.
34:28They've got a job to do.
34:30Do you know what it is? That hat's doing bits.
34:32It gives an extra three inches to your height, to be honest.
34:35Oh, yeah, baby!
34:39In recognition of all their hard work,
34:42Big Brother has rewarded the Cabinet with a secret party.
34:46Ooh!
34:47MUSIC PLAYS
34:59What can I go back through?
35:01Just thinking of food and... And sweets.
35:03And I was saying to you once on the tweet,
35:05oh, do you know, no, I think I'm all right, actually, for food.
35:08Oh, my God!
35:12Holy shit.
35:13It's just like the most delicious spread you've ever seen in your life.
35:16It just gets better. It's so good.
35:18This politics business isn't half bad, is it?
35:21You see why they do it now, don't you?
35:24Meanwhile, the citizens have no booze
35:27and just their basic shopping budget.
35:30So, for breakfast, I had some beans and some corn nuggets.
35:33Then for lunch, I had that pasta, and then I've just had some muesli.
35:37Never my three top choices, but...
35:39I think I'm going to bear the cold shower.
35:42I've done it three times. Really? Yeah, I'll probably have one before bed.
35:45I did it this morning.
35:46I think I'm going to have to wash my hair, though, innit?
35:48Yeah.
35:49Is it cold? Yeah.
35:54Might wash my hair in the hot tub.
35:56Has it been four days? Yeah. Cold showers?
35:58Oh, yeah.
35:59Ming in.
36:01Yeah.
36:03Yeah, that's fucking disgusting, actually.
36:05That is, innit? Mm.
36:09I don't even know what ham is.
36:11That's so good. It might be a sandwich or something.
36:13That's absolutely fantastic ham.
36:15There's a lovely thickness.
36:17Tasty and proper taste.
36:20You're a pork guy.
36:22This is Big Brother.
36:24Ministers, there are extra party supplies available for you in the storeroom.
36:29Extra supplies? But...
36:31..there's a catch.
36:32Oh!
36:34You will need to sneak your extra drinks past the police officers
36:38that are guarding Downing Street.
36:40Nathan, Emma, do you think you're up to the challenge?
36:43Of course we are.
36:44I'm so fucking lonely, we are.
36:46Of course we are, darling.
36:48Can we get a bit of that champagne down?
36:50I want to see them, I want to see this.
36:52Good luck, ministers, and don't get caught.
36:55Don't get caught, yeah.
36:56Don't you worry about us, Big Brother.
36:58So I am going to use your handbag as well.
37:00You know, stay on the edge of caution, you don't need to lie,
37:02just be like, I'm so sorry.
37:03We just needed to check...
37:04Just say, fuck all.
37:05Figure it out, you guys got this.
37:07Ooh!
37:09Ooh!
37:10They quit, they quit.
37:12Bloody hell, what's going on in here?
37:14Looking good. I hope you two are not tired.
37:17You look good. I like it.
37:19Is there toilet paper anywhere? Pick the right person.
37:21Look under here and find it.
37:23Emma!
37:24Yeah?
37:26I've got the vine underneath.
37:27Wait.
37:28Come on, Emma, come on, come on.
37:30Shit.
37:32Go on.
37:33Hey!
37:35It's me.
37:36Toilet roll is in the bathroom and in the bedroom bathroom.
37:38Oh, we got it.
37:39Sorry, Emma.
37:40Only two rolls.
37:41Oh, right, OK.
37:42Only two rolls, honey.
37:43Well, where are we... OK, we'll get it back from out of there.
37:45Oh, what's wrong?
37:46There's no toilet paper.
37:48It's very stressful.
37:49There's two in one each.
37:51Daisy's on the toilet and she can't wipe her arse.
37:54No!
37:56Thanks, guys.
37:58Oh.
38:01What?
38:03Daisy.
38:04That's me throwing Daisy under the bus like that.
38:06Piece of piss.
38:08She's going to fucking kill me.
38:11Oh!
38:14Yeah.
38:16No fucking way.
38:18Daisy, I've got to have a confession to make.
38:20What?
38:21I was like, is there any toilet paper anywhere?
38:23Did you say I had constipation or something?
38:25I said, Daisy's stuck on the toilet and she can't wipe her arse.
38:28Oh, right.
38:30I know, I know.
38:31I know, I know.
38:41What if I said that you can have another hour of Prime House action,
38:45complete with great chat, hot takes,
38:47and a shopping task exclusive that you will not want to miss?
38:50Well, you can, so join me and the gorgeous celeb panel
38:54for Big Brother Live at 10pm.
38:56See you then.
38:595.01pm.
39:00As a reward for completing today's task,
39:02Ash has treated themselves to some new boots.
39:05An eye for pre-love fashion vintage sponsors Big Brother.
39:16MUSIC CONTINUES
39:2511.48pm.
39:30Izzaz and Thomas have been on duty for one hour and 25 minutes.
39:36Thomas is talking to Marcello about his football career.
39:41There was one time, right, I think it was Blackburn,
39:44I went over and asked my dad.
39:46I said, like, oh, like, he's really, really good,
39:48like, where do you want to go?
39:50I said, he's got one leg.
39:51He's like, oh, my God, I never even realised.
39:53Wow.
39:54And I said, look, I couldn't go into academy with one leg.
39:56Then at age 14, I played in the under-21 squad, England.
40:0114?
40:02Yeah.
40:03Under-21s?
40:04Yeah, really, really young.
40:05It was coming, it went too high, it went too high.
40:07I knew that was coming.
40:08Good evening, everyone.
40:09Good evening.
40:10Oh, Boris, Bojo.
40:12Hello, everyone, how are you?
40:13Hello.
40:14Hello, Beat Potato.
40:15We're good.
40:16You all look suspicious.
40:18Why do we all...?
40:19What have you been doing?
40:20Fucking bored shitless, that's what I've been doing.
40:23I'm glad to get out.
40:24That's bullshit.
40:25They've got drinks, I reckon.
40:26Have you got drinks?
40:27Have I got drinks?
40:28I fucking wish.
40:29Have you got drinks?
40:30No.
40:31No.
40:32Well, can we get some?
40:33What are you doing?
40:34I'm trying to smell if you've been drinking.
40:35I'm trying to smell, there we go.
40:36No, I don't think he has.
40:38I just need a wee drink, like, a wee glass of Posecco would be lovely.
40:41Or champagne.
40:43Just thinking, imagine if they gave you a little party
40:45and drinks in the other room and then it's, like, lockdown parties.
40:48Ah!
40:50Like a Boris party?
40:52Yeah.
40:53Oh, my God.
40:54And we're in lockdown and you guys are in there having a party.
40:56See if we'd have done that.
40:57I'd have pissed myself, by the way.
40:58I honestly thought they was doing that.
41:00What?
41:01Yes, seriously, we were.
41:02Did you?
41:03Yeah.
41:04A Boris lockdown party?
41:05Yes, cheese and wine.
41:06Remind me why I didn't think that.
41:07Did you not?
41:08No, I didn't.
41:09I thought that's what was happening.
41:10Honestly, I'm so up for that, if that's the case.
41:12But, like...
41:13I'm so up for that.
41:14Yeah, like, I don't care about you a lot if I'm...
41:16Oh, yeah.
41:17Like, you, I'd invite you, baked potato, but...
41:19Nice, nice.
41:20Oh, yeah.
41:22Emma has come to talk to Big Brother.
41:25I've loved being a bossy old cow today.
41:28I think I've got a bit of evil running through me,
41:31which makes for a very good politician, I should imagine.
41:34I think I'm actually really horrible,
41:37because as soon as we had to nominate someone
41:40to stay up all night,
41:42I straightaway threw Izzaz under the bus,
41:45and Nathan quickly backed me up.
41:47He was saying,
41:48it would be really nice for Izzaz to do a task,
41:50cos he hasn't done one yet.
41:52Bullshit!
41:53He just wanted to stick him on the door.
41:55But I was totally putting Izzaz in there,
41:58because he's been a bit of a naughty boy today.
42:02He's actually admitted to being a bit of a shit-stirrer today,
42:06so, you know, it's only fair he has a little punishment
42:10for his behaviour.
42:12I just don't get him.
42:14He's a sweet boy, but he is very odd,
42:16and still he continues to get on my tits.
42:20And he's starting to get on other people's tits,
42:23even people that don't have tits.
42:3112.46am.
42:34I really got into the zone with the character, actually.
42:37Got at one with being Boris, which, I'll be honest,
42:40oh, I loved it.
42:42I feel like it has gone to your head a bit.
42:44Bit of power.
42:46Did it give you a taste of your future?
42:48Yeah, like I thought, yeah, I want to be inside Boris, yeah.
42:52I need it. I need it.
42:55He's slept with a lot of women, hasn't he?
42:57I know, it sucks me.
42:58And Boris has!
42:59He's got kids all over the shop, yeah.
43:01I bet he's a good laugh.
43:02Yeah, I think he's all right.
43:04If Boris Johnson was to hit on me,
43:06I would, like, probably sleep with him.
43:08Pretty hard.
43:09I'm sure he'll be thrilled, Lily.
43:11I'm sure he'll be thrilled.
43:13Hannah is in the diving room talking about Izzaz and Thomas.
43:18Babes, I feel like the moment that everyone goes to sleep,
43:21they might just mess up the base one time for the one time,
43:24which you can't come from.
43:25I really don't have trust and faith in those two boys.
43:28Honestly, I don't know why.
43:29Something's just telling me they might do something, literally.
43:32That means our luxury shopping task has gone out of the window.
43:37But hopefully they have their act together.
43:40Like, we're on rations, babes.
43:42I ain't never been on rations, do you know what I'm saying?
43:44Honestly.
43:45Some of the housemates are in the bedroom.
43:48Did you guys make those bagels?
43:50No, no, no.
43:51Oh, did they come from a higher place?
43:53It was all a bit of bagel drama after that.
43:55Yeah, there was right bagel drama after.
43:58Where was bagel drama come from? Was it Dean?
44:00What?
44:01Did you cause bagel gate?
44:03Yeah, I threw it in the fucking bin.
44:04But he said he was fuming.
44:06But then when Dean asked him, he said he wasn't annoyed.
44:08Who's fuming?
44:09Izzaz.
44:10I don't think he was fuming.
44:12No, he told me his exact words.
44:14I said, I wasn't annoyed.
44:16Izzaz said, I think you was annoyed.
44:18He went, annoyed.
44:19He went, annoyed.
44:20I was furious.
44:21He wanted to pretend that we'd had an argument.
44:24Well, that's bullshit because you're now going to get me riled up
44:27and think I'm going to fucking argue with someone over a fucking bagel.
44:29Don't piss me off. Don't fucking do it.
44:36I'm just trying to avoid all the dramas.
44:39I'm causing one today just to see how people react.
44:41Like the bagel stuff?
44:42Yeah, the bagel stuff.
44:43I just can't believe how small things can really, really get so big so quick, bro.
44:47It's just wound me up.
44:49You all right, my guy?
44:50Yeah, bro, I'm good.
44:51I just don't like fucking shit-stirrers.
44:54Yeah.
44:55I don't.
44:56Like, I thought it was all finished with today,
44:58and then I got told that Izz was doing it to wind people up.
45:02That's not funny.
45:03So why are you doing that, bro?
45:05That's not OK.
45:13This week, Ali, Diz, Lily and Martha face the public vote.
45:21Who goes?
45:23You decide.
45:26Head to the app to vote for the housemate you want to evict.
45:30The housemate with the most votes will be evicted.
45:34Voting is free and you can access it via the app.
45:38You can vote up to five times.
45:40The vote closes in Friday's eviction show.
45:50So if you haven't seen it yet, I assure you, you're missing out.
45:53The drama is amazing.
45:55Right now, ITVX, Samuel L Jackson, Kevin Hart and more
45:59are starring in the incredible Fight Night.
46:01OK, here next, AJ Dudu is picking apart what we've just seen
46:05with a load of her mates.
46:06Get ready for Big Brother. Late and live eyes for two.