Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a 30-year-old Michigan man who went to the hospital after putting six kidney beans up his dong and attempting to fire them out of there.
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00:00all right time now to play if we will yes this now it's time to play what's up his penis
00:16it's huge
00:21a 30 year old michigan man is the guy we're talking about michigan man
00:2830 year old michigan man yeah he was looking for some odd sexual gratification i get that
00:37and he decided the best way to get that would be to shove something up his pee hole
00:45a little sounding action huh what's up his penis he probably got the idea to pleasure himself by
00:53listening to our show exactly oh somebody gets put that in there let me get one of those yeah
00:57corkscrew toothbrush oh it's something you could purchase in a grocery store
01:05is it produce now does that mean it might be it might be what about green beans
01:13oh i'm close you're close frozen peas no
01:18what about canned beans you can now they mush i know lima beans oh we're getting closer
01:27we're getting closer kidney beans
01:29wow this 30 year old michigan man stuffed six kidney beans into his pee hole jeez he pushed
01:41them all the way into his urethra for sexual gratification and was apparently hoping his body would shoot them out
01:50when he finale it's not that strong it didn't work no he finale'd
01:59the beans got stuck yeah and he had to be rushed to the hospital
02:02i mean that's so many beans up there
02:07mine's only six beans long if that i think you're being generous i know for sure i couldn't put a kidney bean in
02:16i don't think it i don't think it's i don't think it's happening i'm more of a i'm more of a baked bean man
02:25i want you to they have some x-rays yeah see look at i'm i can't even i don't even want to tell you
02:35how many kidney beans i mean they had to put a ruler next to him
02:40he got almost five inches worth of kidney beans up there
02:45there's how they looked inside of him
02:48wow that's so dumb
02:50oh god
02:51they started bunching up there
02:53some of the beans were found in the urethra bundled up together
02:57that would have caused a problem you think
02:59how did they get all these photos did he release them
03:03i don't know
03:05that one almost looks like an artist render
03:07it was written up in the in uh oh they put it in a medical journal
03:11oh okay
03:12he tried um yeah so he tried to first
03:16like you know
03:18them out right
03:20yeah i don't know what you're talking about but yes
03:23natural emission
03:23yeah uh-huh uh-huh
03:24and then tried using tweezers
03:26yes
03:27that didn't work either
03:29this was in lansing
03:30wow i mean just what a thing to even attempt
03:34what a thing to be what gets you off
03:38imagine that emergency call
03:39right
03:40imagine that
03:41yeah
03:42how horrible that is
03:43i got some beans in my dick
03:44i i wish that the medical journal had like a comedy edition
03:48where like somebody
03:49because i'd call that the tale of old bean dick
03:52because you know they just
03:55every weird story they have
03:56i wish they had like a comedy lean to it
03:58you don't want to be old bean dick
04:01no you don't you don't but i don't know how he cooked up that idea
04:04i well i want to know what else he's had in there
04:06yeah that wasn't his first go-round right
04:09you don't do six kidney beans
04:10first out of the gate
04:12i think he had probably had a lot of stuff that he could easily remove
04:15so
04:16you know like
04:17pens
04:20pens and things like that
04:21yeah
04:21yeah i don't know
04:22his imagination of what was going to happen at the end was
04:26really hilarious
04:27well he thought he'd like shoot them out right
04:29right out of them
04:31no they're too
04:32i mean
04:33maybe with something much smaller
04:35that could have happened
04:37i still think even then
04:38yeah like could you put a toothpick in there
04:39and then fire it out like a blow
04:41that's too long
04:41i'm thinking like tiny and
04:43like a
04:43even a bb i think is even too
04:45maybe too
04:47weighty
04:48you know
04:48and you have to be like one of the guys who
04:51you know
04:52it's like fires it
04:53you you know
04:54oh you gotta have quite a stream
04:55you know
04:56you gotta be like peter north to really get kidney beans out of there
04:59yeah the average human can't shoot kidney beans out of their dong
05:03no
05:03yeah
05:04when they finale
05:04it's a wild dream he had
05:06it's insane to know that that happened not too far from here
05:09usually these stories are like
05:10in
05:10far away places
05:11yeah
05:12to me as well like just
05:14you know you could i could see
05:16you put the beans in
05:18but the fact that you shove them up
05:20more and more and more
05:21and one gets to your bladder
05:23i'm like what else
05:25what are you doing
05:26it's almost like he was loading it like an old school musket
05:28yeah you're right
05:29the whole idea of sounding
05:31gives me the heebie jeebies
05:33it does give me a chill too
05:34you know like i can't even imagine
05:36voluntarily shoving something up my pee hole
05:39to get sexual grab
05:41to me that's how you torture me
05:43it's the pain
05:44if i'm in abu grabe
05:45that's what they do
05:46right
05:47that's how you get me to spill all my secrets
05:49yeah
05:50threaten to shove beans up my dick
05:51yep
05:52i'll tell you anything
05:54someone said jack and the bean cock
05:58that's another good
06:01that's quite a tale
06:03so for doing it for pleasure
06:05can't wrap my head around that
06:07i'll never get it