Fraternity Chronicles

From "The REAL College Survival Guide" by Kevin Lawson

Transcript

00:00So, I decided to join a fraternity. Yes, me, the introverted bookworm who once spent an

00:06entire Saturday binge-watching documentaries about the mating habits of penguins. I thought,

00:13why not? College is about new experiences. Little did I know, I was about to dive head

00:19first into a world that felt like a bizarre cross between a reality TV show and a circus,

00:26with a sprinkle of existential dread. The first night of rush week I walked into the

00:31fraternity house, and it was like stepping into a different dimension. The walls were

00:37plastered with posters of past parties, and the air was thick with a mix of stale beer

00:42and something that can only be described as fraternity cologne. You know, that scent that

00:48screams, I'm here to have a good time, but I might also regret my life choices tomorrow.

00:55As I entered, I was greeted by a group of guys who looked like they had just walked

00:59off the set of a college movie. They were all wearing matching t-shirts that read Brothers

01:05for Life, in a font that was somehow both aggressive and inviting. I felt like I had

01:11stumbled into a cult meeting, and I was the new recruit who hadn't read the fine print.

01:17The first thing they did was hand me a beer. Now, I'm not a big drinker. My idea of a wild

01:23night is finishing an entire bag of microwave popcorn while watching a rom-com. But here

01:30I was, clutching a lukewarm can of something that claimed to be beer. Trying to look cool

01:36while my insides were screaming, what have you done? The initiation rituals began, and

01:42let me tell you, they were something else. They had this game called chug or be chugged.

01:49I'm pretty sure it was invented by someone who thought, how can I make my friends regret

01:54their life choices while simultaneously bonding over bad decisions? The rules were simple.

02:01You either chug your drink, or someone else chugs it for you. I was terrified. I had never

02:06chugged anything in my life that didn't come from a juice box. As the night progressed,

02:11I found myself in a series of increasingly ridiculous challenges. One guy was blindfolded

02:17and had to identify various foods by taste alone. Spoiler alert, he thought mayonnaise

02:22was ice cream. Another guy had to recite the Greek alphabet while doing a handstand. I'm

02:28still not sure how that one worked out, but I do know that there was a lot of laughter

02:34and a few minor injuries involved. Then came the moment of truth, the final initiation.

02:41They gathered us all in a circle, and I could feel the weight of my decision pressing down

02:46on me. They asked us to share our most embarrassing moments. I thought, great, I'll just tell

02:52them about the time I tripped over my own feet in front of my crush. But then I listened

02:57to the stories around me. One guy had accidentally sent a text meant for his girlfriend to his

03:04mom. Another had fallen asleep in the middle of a lecture and woken up to find the entire

03:09class had left. I realized my story was like a light snack compared to their full-course

03:16meals of humiliation. In the end, I survived the initiation, and I was officially a brother.

03:25But here's the kicker. I learned that being part of a fraternity isn't just about the

03:30wild parties or the ridiculous challenges. It's about the friendships that form in the

03:36chaos. It's about the late-night conversations, the shared laughter, and the realization that

03:42we're all just trying to figure this whole thing out together. So yes, I joined a fraternity,

03:48and while I may not have become the life of the party, I did find a group of people who

03:53accepted me for who I am, awkward moments and all. And honestly, that's a pretty good

04:00deal for a Penguin documentary-watching introvert like me.