Kevin Reacts to Benidorm S9E2
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00:00Hello everybody, welcome back to the channel, my name's Kevin, I'm a geek, you are watching
00:15Kevin the Geek.
00:16Welcome back to Benidorm series 9, this is episode 2.
00:19Last time out, well, we got a new character, right at the very end, Loretta, who is Sharon's
00:29mum, so we've now got Sharon's mum and Billy's dad, interesting what their two dynamics could
00:36be interesting, because the families, Billy, Robert and Jodie, don't seem to like her.
00:45She definitely likes Tiger, Tiger was a bit drunk and it led to a very awkward situation
00:52right at the very end of the episode, and of course we brought back Sam, Sam is back
00:57as Aslana, but not only is she back, she's actually a holiday rep, which we've not really
01:04had on the show before, so that is going to be interesting, how the dynamic goes with
01:08that.
01:09And we, what else have we got, oh yeah, we did have actually Pauline last episode, sorry
01:18not Pauline, sorry Jacqueline, we did have Jacqueline, which means I think to date, only
01:24Matteo has now appeared in every single episode.
01:28Is Jacqueline not going to appear on the show again, is she going to come back, hopefully
01:31she comes back, because I love Jacqueline, although, of course, it is not the same without
01:35Donald, of course, may he rest in peace, Kenny Ireland, but let's check out this latest episode.
01:41Absolutely, Mrs. Hennessey Voss, I'll let her know, no, this is Leslie, I work mainly
01:49on the reception these days, oh, about five foot seven, Auburn Bob, a certain amount of
01:56feminine mystique, no, not feminine mystique, what I said was feminine mystique, never mind,
02:05yes, I'll give her the message, adios, Crystal on the phone wanting to know where Templar
02:12Savage is, where is she, she's had to go out to have her hair done, she was booked into
02:17a blow and go, but Kenneth, he's gone haywire again, good, in that case, I can leave these
02:21brochures here on reception without that whinging old bag chewing me hair off, well, you may
02:25get away with it, but hey, I'd hurry up if I was you, oh, Leslie, could you look at my
02:33phone for me, it keeps switching itself off, oh, not really my strong point, Mrs. Templar
02:38Savage, I've got very fat fingers, which is good for some things, but rubbish for technology,
02:47I keep missing calls, oh, you've just missed another, oh, Mrs. Hennessy Vass has just rang,
02:53you're joking, you didn't say I was out having my hair done, did you, oh, now would I land
02:58you in it, well, what did she want, she wants you to go on a two-day conference in Barcelona
03:04where she's supposed to make a speech, escaping this place with a little two-day jaunt in
03:11Barcelona with a Solana CEO, oh, I think I could be tempted, Leslie, will you call Crystal
03:21for me and say I'd be delighted to attend, no bother, Mrs. T, stonking bonking trip to
03:31Ibiza, 50% off, Leslie, what's the meaning of this, I think it means half price, I know
03:37what 50% off means, who put these leaflets here, who's your thing,
03:45as if I have to ask, and it does say Benigo Travel on top of the leaflet,
03:50boo,
03:53pinky caps,
04:04oh, you have got to be taking a piss, sleepy wasted morning, hello, it's Jacqueline,
04:13please leave a message after the tone, Jacqueline, why do you never answer your phone,
04:18I'm at Alicante, as you know, your flight's been delayed, so I'm going to go back to Benny,
04:23and I'm going to keep my phone switched on, so text me when you know what's happening,
04:27and if you've left your mobile in that kitchen drawer again, I'll swing for you, hang on, hello,
04:36I'm pretty sure I know who that is, that's, um, oh, Jamie Dunster,
04:45no, sorry, Phil Dunster, he plays Jamie Tartt in Ted Lasso, Jamie Tartt,
04:57Jamie Tartt, oh my god, if you have not seen Ted Lasso, all I can say is you must watch it,
05:04I don't care who you are, don't care if you like football or not, it is honestly one of the most
05:09amazing shows I have ever seen, I did do reactions to series three of Ted Lasso when that came out,
05:17that was literally the first kind of reaction shows I did on this channel,
05:21and of course that was very early on, it was done on my phone, so before I got,
05:25uh, you know, half decent at putting the quality together, and I'm really hoping that they do make
05:30another series, as they seem to be suggesting at the moment, oh my god, I can't, I can't believe
05:35he's in this, oh, hello, yeah, that's, that's it, brilliant,
05:47oh, oh, excuse me, excuse me, I'm sorry, I think there's been a mistake, when I said a cab to
05:54Benidorm was 80 euros, what I meant, no, don't worry, I know that probably doesn't include
05:57toll road or tip, call it 100 euros,
06:03if you'd like to follow me, sir, did you have a good flight, sir, yeah, great, yeah, yeah, yeah,
06:11the more people I take out of the all-inclusive loop, the better for you, what do you mean by
06:15all-inclusive loop, well, people are away on my trips, they're not drinking your alcohol,
06:21and they're not eating your food, reducing your customer to staff percentage ratio,
06:25thus, lowering your overheads and increasing your profits, she's got a good business brain,
06:32change your leaflets, and I don't have a problem with it, I don't mind the use of the word
06:35stonking, I'm not the dinosaur you make out, but I draw the line at bonking,
06:44I'm sorry, I said thank you, I don't think Sam's in charge of the leaflets, just be careful lady,
06:52I'm watching you, naturally, as you can bonk, as you can't watch,
07:04one orange juice, grass to the ass, why do you never drink alcohol, doesn't really agree with me,
07:10other people, they vomit on each other, pee themselves, fall over, do you think alcohol
07:15is with them, hiya, it's a tiger, isn't it, oh hey Mr D, no, I'm Joey, do you want a drink,
07:23uh no, no, no, not for me, I'm just on my way, oh yeah, go on then, just a quick one,
07:28you're twisting me out, I'm not twisting anything, uh yeah, a bottle of lager please,
07:34so a bit of a mad one last night, no, not really, you know average, right, right,
07:47Billy, you're not down with the kids mate, I must say you, you handle your ale a lot
07:51better than our Rob, he's not even up yet, ale, isn't that what they used to drink in like olden
07:57days, King Arthur, I'm not that ancient, you cheeky bugger, no, that would make me about
08:06700 years old, you don't look anything like that, dude,
08:16so uh, much fanny in town, I'm sorry, fanny, you know, uh, girls in town, were there many
08:24girls in town, yeah, loads,
08:36right, well, I'll be off, yeah, I'll be back for that,
08:40I'll wait for you if you like, yeah, don't bother yourself,
08:42what a waste of a beer, can I have it please,
08:57oh yeah, that's brilliant, Kenny, thanks so much, ah, you're more than welcome,
09:02Ryan, cheers, good luck with the proposal tonight, god don't, do you think I'm crazy,
09:10crashing my fiancee's girl the other day, no, she'd be thrilled, what time you meeting her,
09:14well, she don't know I'm here, so I'm just gonna try and track her down, how,
09:17I thought she knew you were coming, but she just didn't know about the proposal,
09:20no, no, she ain't got a clue I'm here, oh, you think I'm crazy, don't you, well,
09:25maybe, if it was me, you're going down on one knee in front of, I'd be thrilled,
09:30I try, listen, can I pay for my return cab fare now,
09:34I know I'm like with money and I don't have to get a bus back to the airport,
09:38bloody Nora, I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I can confirm that booking for you right now if you
09:43want, and listen, I also own a hair salon and a hotel in Benidorm, so if you want to trim before
09:48your big night, just swing by the salon and hotel this afternoon, a hair salon as well as a taxi
09:53business, my god, real life entrepreneur, can I touch you, only if I can choose where, in fact,
10:00if that girlfriend ever kicks you to the curb, you can have me on tap, cheers mate,
10:12bloody hell,
10:30oh, it's you, what are you playing at, no, what are you playing at, well, I'm having this thing
10:48called a holiday, how much did you drink last night, well, if you hang on a second, I'll get
10:52me a drink diary, I write down all my drinks as I buy them, do you, no, of course I don't,
10:57what sort of question is that, how much did I drink, we're in Benidorm, all right,
11:01here's another question for you, who were you out with last night, this is about Nana Chase,
11:06it might be, dad, we bumped into Nana Chase and she was a bit, well, she was Nana Chase,
11:13she was wrecked and flirting with everyone, but not much worse than she usually is,
11:18what time did you all get in, I came home about four, just as they were all going to that big
11:25club and cafe, Benidorm, hang on, you left your nan drunk in Benidorm at four in the morning,
11:33yeah, from what he said, it sounds like she can handle it, no, I'd have done the same, to be
11:36honest, so you don't know where she ended up, what do you mean where she ended up,
11:44is that Tiger's room,
11:52yeah,
12:07oh Jesus,
12:14what's wrong with you, asking people to remember things, maybe the lad doesn't want to remember,
12:18yeah,
12:24I'm going back to bed, yeah, Billy really knows how to make things awkward, listen,
12:33hey, we all make mistakes, I'm sorry, who you, what you did last night,
12:44oh, yeah, as I said, it's all a bit of a blur, I remember being in the club, but
12:50I don't remember getting home, no, selective amnesia,
12:55what, it happens to people who've gone through traumatic events in their lives,
13:00people in car crashes, kids being chased by clowns at circus,
13:03is it the same thing,
13:21oh, is he remembering now,
13:24oh, oh,
13:42brilliant, absolutely brilliant, the only reason she didn't get it was a lack of experience, lack
13:48of experience, I've just paid for her to have a year at bloody state school, how much more
13:53experience do they want, experience doing television commercials, well, she got down to the
13:58last two, so that proves something, doesn't it, ah, that there was somebody better, not better,
14:02just more experienced, where have you been all this time, bloody hell, you look white as a sheet,
14:10where's our Rob, is everything all right, yeah, yeah, everything's fine,
14:16have you got runs, I had a bit loose this morning, oh, Spanish eggs, they don't cook them through,
14:26here we go, what the frigging hell does she look like, well, here we all are, hiya ma'am,
14:34what's going on, you were supposed to be here last night, Sharon, you look fabulous,
14:41still managing to keep that weight off, just, I'm very proud of you, hiya Loretta, do you want to
14:47sit down, oh Billy, you're looking tired, are you managing to get enough sleep, probably getting
14:55more than you, Eddie, Loretta, you're looking colourful, I'm about to say the same to you,
15:07don't bother getting up, well, I wasn't going to, oh, oh, does Nana Chase get a kiss,
15:17Jodie, look how she's shot up, oh, you only saw her about three weeks ago,
15:22ma'am, look at those long legs, you're going to grow up looking exactly like your Nana,
15:29oh, actually, I wish I was about to take her to the kids club,
15:39yeah, let's get him out of there, we don't want to traumatise her,
15:44er, did you want a drink, er, gin and tonic, don't go mad on the tonic,
15:49do you want anything dad, I'm all right Sean, thanks Bill, you know, you do look very tired,
15:59Loretta, you've been saying that to me for the last 20 years, doesn't it ever occur to you that
16:04I'm not tired, this is just how my face looks, somebody got out of the wrong side of bed this
16:10morning, I might have got out of the wrong side of bed but at least it was my bed I got out of,
16:17always been his problem that he can't resist a dig, I bet it was true though,
16:22a leopard never changes its spots, still the dirty sex mad slapper, even at your age,
16:29we don't all curl up and die after 60 Eddie, some of us continue to enjoy an exciting
16:37varied sex life, just because the last time you saw your cock Adam were a lad,
16:52just another minute or so, now Brenda, that bleacher is quite strong, so if it starts to
16:57burn your scalp let me know and I'll give you something to bite onto, hey where have you been,
17:04I have been on my first successful airport run, that was ages ago, what do you mean successful,
17:09where's Jacqueline, I wasn't talking about Jacqueline, she's been delayed,
17:13she went with her bag of haribo at East Midlands, I picked up a man at Alicante,
17:18oh my god, give me 100 euros, 100 euros, you're supposed to sell while you can,
17:23you're not for old market, yeah exactly, you cheeky git, he thought I was a cab and he's
17:29given me an idea, blow and go hair and beauty salon incorporating B&G cabs, Troy will never
17:36agree to it, he doesn't have to if he doesn't know about it, it's Troy's salon and he's here
17:40often, 10 weeks of the year, what he doesn't know won't hurt him, Kenneth apart from the police
17:44cracking down on illegal airport runs, you haven't got the time to be running a minicab
17:48business, we'll talk about it later, in the meantime according to them smoke signals,
17:54your client appears to be in distress, what, oh my god, bloody hell, oh, oh Brenda,
18:02oh Brenda come with me, how come she didn't say anything, it's not like she can't see you,
18:08boss with a big secret, oh yes, I actually own this hotel, but I am working here, how do you say,
18:18incontinento, do you know I am disguised as a barman, Mateo, Mateo, Miss Temple Savage,
18:26managers of the Solana and my boss, oh she ain't falling for that surely, what was that all about,
18:34hmm, I have no idea, Mateo, I need your help, it's why I'm here, Crystal Hennessy Vass has asked me
18:43to go to a conference in Barcelona, stop, I know what you're going to say, do you, of course,
18:51you want me to ride the position of manager while you are away, exactly, the thing is, what,
18:57don't be ridiculous, no, I thought she wanted me to go with her, but she wants me to go in
19:04her place, this is not a problem, the train to Barcelona is quick, or maybe you want me to drive
19:09you, you don't understand, she wants me to give them her speech, if you let me have a speech,
19:16I can give it to them, no, in Spanish, okay, to give a speech in Spanish, you say,
19:23aquà está el discurso, it means here is a speech, no, you idiot, I have to read out
19:30a five-page speech in Spanish, this is impossible, you do not speak Spanish, I know I don't speak
19:39Spanish, but maybe you should go and deliver it, well, when I got this job at the Solana,
19:46yes, I told them I spoke fluent Spanish, never lie,
19:58I lied to them, I've never spoken Spanish, okay, there is a way I could help you, okay,
20:07of course, okay, go wait for me in the manager's office, I will be there in five minutes, yes, okay,
20:14I told you, say me again, no, sir, when the brochure says there are no childminders in the
20:23hotel, it means we don't supply them, the fact your wife's a childminder isn't a problem at all,
20:30thank you, no, are they that thick, oh my god, this is the problem,
20:40I mean, it's not a major problem, but it is just,
20:45the show, I think, was always so clever, so witty, at the moment, it feels like they're
20:51trying to go for really cheap laughs, and unfortunately, it's making a lot of characters
20:55come across very dumb, hiya, how's it going, yeah, good, thanks, can I help you with anything,
21:05um, just a bit bored, to be honest, well, you have come to the right place,
21:09have you thought about one of our trips, no, not really, I think just a chat would do,
21:14okay, well, as you know, I'm Sam, yeah, I don't know if you remember, but my name's Joey,
21:21I do remember, well, what about a chat about some of the free trips we have,
21:27yeah, cool, I don't want to go on a trip, but I'm really happy to chat about them,
21:31cool, so, this is a free trip to the waterfalls of Algar, this is a free trip to Guadalest,
21:37this is a free trip to the local bullring, wow, you got a lot of free trips, yeah,
21:43this one's a little bit more exciting, it's a trip to Ibiza, a trip to Ibiza, oh my days, Ibiza,
21:53I can't believe you go to Ibiza, yeah, we do a trip to Ibiza, where is Ibiza,
22:00it's an island in between Spain and Mallorca, wow, where's Mallorca, it's an island that would
22:06be next to Spain if Ibiza weren't in the way, cool, there's a trip, all the details are on
22:11the back of the leaflet, next trip's Friday, okay, we've got to go on that, can you put me
22:18and my mate Tiger down for it, no problem, I haven't got my cash box with me at the moment,
22:23but we'll sort out the details tonight, oh yeah, of course, if you just put both your names and
22:28room numbers on this list, that'll confirm your places, Tiger's gonna be so excited, Ibiza,
22:36did you want to still chat about some of the other trips, no way man, I've got to top up my time in
22:41Ibiza, we're going to Ibiza,
22:59well, okay, I have read all of the speech and I can say 100% it is definitely in Spanish,
23:06I know it's in Spanish, I told you it was in Spanish, okay, so what is it you want me to do,
23:12I want you to help me learn it, okay, can't you just read it, oh, first we have good afternoon
23:19men and women, this is my pleasure, in Spanish, I've got to read the speech in Spanish,
23:25in Spanish, four or five pages, this is not a joke, my job could be at stake, sorry, okay,
23:43I have an idea, why don't we do it phonetically,
23:47yes, of course, I was going to suggest we do it phonetically, right, he doesn't know what it is,
23:56you don't want phonetically, no, of course he doesn't, airport run to Alicante on Thursday
24:03and where's that from, I'll be here, what time's your flight love, let's have a look,
24:11is Kenneth going to do any actual work in the salon, what, can you do me an acid
24:16perm and colour two o'clock on Thursday, look in the book,
24:20you've got Winnie from Camping Villamar in for a Brazilian blowout, well, there's your answer,
24:26yeah, that's all booked in for you love, what number Cali Beethoven,
24:31all right, we'll see you then, bye-bye, you're getting very peevish about my new business
24:37adventure Liam, I said you're getting very peevish, very peevish, peevish, what's that supposed to
24:43mean, you just can't bear the fact that I'm an entrepreneur, obviously, I'm an entrepreneur,
24:47you just can't bear the fact that I'm an entrepreneur, entrepreneur, you can't even
24:50spell it, yes, I can, o-n-t, hang on, o-n-t-r, doing illegal airport runs in a clapped out old
24:58angle, one seat belt and no road tax does not make you an entrepreneur, it makes you a criminal,
25:04that car is a classic, it just needs a bit of money spending on it,
25:07which I'll be earning doing these airport runs, are you listening to me,
25:12Brian, what a lovely surprise, all right love, uh-oh,
25:18Kenneth, oh Liam, quick, large brandy, hang on, do you want a drink Brian,
25:27two large brandies, oh go on, oh there, there, oh dear, see you now,
25:35did the, did the proposal not go very well,
25:41where's our Robert, is he still not up, he had a late night last night, I know, I was with him,
25:48what, I bumped into him with his mates, Tiger and Joey, where did you bump into them, some
25:55club in Benidorm, you said you didn't come and see us last night because you got here too late,
26:00I did, too late to come and see you, but not too late to go out dancing, especially in Benidorm,
26:06morning, afternoon, oh you finally dragged yourself out of your pit then, you've missed
26:12half the day, rough night love, oh not as rough as Joey and Tiger, they didn't get here until
26:20half six, Joey didn't drink, he took some ropey old bird home with him, but he can't remember,
26:26oh, morning Anna Chase, how's your head, I don't remember getting any complaints,
26:34oh,
26:49are you not gonna see if your friend's all right, no, I'm not, it were a good night last night,
26:56shame you bailed out early, looks to me like it were a good job he bailed out early,
27:01she half killed that lad, oh can you stop, can you please stop talking about it,
27:12oh it were a joke,
27:15what, it were a joke, I didn't sleep with your friend, don't be ridiculous, he must be half my
27:21age, try a quarter, there you go, I mean she snogged him at the very least,
27:26were you, of course I was, as if I'd do something like that,
27:33how come when he took one look over here he collapsed, he weren't looking over here,
27:37same reason as half the people here are flaked out, it's boiling hot and he's been out drinking
27:42till the early hours, right, come on then Rob, go and get us all another drink and go and check
27:48on your friend on the way over, oh I've just sat down, just give me five minutes, oh poor love,
27:55five minutes, so you seem to be bearing up all right Loretta, what time did you get in last
28:02night, oh I don't worry about things like that Bill, maybe if you didn't you wouldn't look so
28:07tired all the time, it's Billy, I'm sorry, my name as you well know is Billy, not William, not Bill,
28:20not Will or Willie, I was christened Billy, the fact that I look tired or not is a matter of
28:25opinion, my name on the other hand is not, you were actually christened Bella, excuse me, I beg your
28:38pardon, like she said, I beg your pardon, well when you were born your mama had chosen our Terry's
28:47name, so now it were my turn, I chose Bella, I was christened Bella, yeah, did you know it until now
28:59to tell me I was christened Bella, well we changed it about a week after christening because so many
29:05people were taking piss, I wonder why, why did you want to call him Bella Eddie, oh my god dad,
29:12you weren't born a girl were you, I miss this, you've got to be joking, it's not even a girl's
29:20name, it's a dog's name Bella, didn't grandma have a dog called Bella, she did, she always looked tired
29:26all the time as well, the dog I mean, not grandma Rupert, do you mind telling me after 40 odd years
29:32why on earth I was christened Bella, it was after Bella Lugosi, you know Count Dracula, I've always
29:40been a big fan, great, so not only did you give me a girl's name, you named me after a vampire,
29:48that's right yeah, all of you take the piss, hey I said get the drinks in,
29:54sorry, oh god, it's crazy some of the alternative names you get,
30:03like my mum, I may have said this on the channel before, you know it may be new for some of you,
30:09so apparently, I'm still unconvinced by this, but apparently my mum at one point wanted to call me
30:20Tudor, yeah you heard that right, Tudor as in like Henry VIII Tudor, and this is why I'm still
30:29not convinced by this story, because she said to me the reason that I was going to call you Tudor
30:36was because of Ed Tudor Paul, who was the, he was the second host of the tv game show The Crystal
30:43Maze, a show that I absolutely love, but he didn't host the show until 1994, and I was born in 1989,
30:54time frame wise doesn't really match up there does it,
30:57oh um same again please love, granddad, I'm all right thanks son, I'll have a little brandy I think,
31:06no problem,
31:17is that in the lady's glass, oh sorry, sorry pal, it was an accident,
31:24oh, that's your fault that is, my fault, after something that happened 40 odd years ago,
31:31shut up, just shut up, what is happening here, does he need the first aids, no no he's fine mate,
31:39he just went a bit dizzy, mate are you okay, yeah yeah I'm fine, I just,
31:46just had a bit of a moment, I think I'm still drunk, oh he needs the hairy dog,
31:51I will bring more beer, no no absolutely not, you tried to help someone and they took it up in your
31:58face, so did you boys get lucky last night, oh no mate, not a sniff, but your grandma is hilarious,
32:08I went home about five and left those two dancing the night away, oh which two, tiger and your gran,
32:14oh, I think I need some water, I'll get it, Joey you want one, yeah sweet,
32:33what's going on tag, leave me mate, you don't want to know,
32:44I tried to ring her but her phone was switched off, so I looked on Facebook and saw one of her
32:56friends had checked into the tiki beach bar, and so I went down there, which one's the tiki beach
33:02bar, oh it's that one right on the Levanti beach, it's usually filled with a heaving throng of
33:06shirtless tag parties, you know firemen, builders, manual labourers, that sort of thing, I pass it
33:12every day on my way to work, that bar's not on your way to work, I never said it was, I said I
33:17pass it every day, sorry, so I get there and I've got the ring in my pocket, I rehearse my lines,
33:26I'm ready to get down on one knee, oh I don't like the sound of this, that's because you're
33:29not a romantic like me, I don't mean I don't like the romance, I mean I'm worried about what's coming
33:33next and romantic, you, your idea of romance is having a shag and asking them their name on the
33:37way out, were you listening to my story, sorry, so I go up to my friends and I ask them where's
33:45Megan, and they all just stare at me like they're frozen, and there's an announcement
33:51in second place of the miss wet t-shirt competition, Megan, and I turn around and I see her,
33:59oh but you're married or she'd have come first, I'm not finished yet, she hasn't finished,
34:05sorry, so I turn around and she's on this little stage in a wet t-shirt,
34:11snogging a bloke, so I confront this fella, I say what do you think you're doing, he says what does
34:16it look like dickhead, that's not nice, I said you know that woman is, and he says yeah, it's my wife,
34:23o to the m to the f to the g, oh I know, I fancy having a wet t-shirt competition at your wedding,
34:30I don't think it was their wedding, weren't their wedding, they've been married for years,
34:40no you've lost me as well,
34:44when I first started going out with Megan, she said she were divorced,
34:47which didn't surprise me, she was 20 years older than me, but she wasn't divorced, she separated,
34:53was separated, she came on this holiday knowing that he would be in Benidorm at the same time,
35:00how long have you and Megan been going out together,
35:05two months, two months, shit, and you followed her homology to ask her to marry you, I know,
35:10I know, I know, I might be young, but I guess I'm an old romantic, he asked earlier on if they
35:18thought he was crazy, I mean two months and 20 years older, it's a little bit crazy, two months,
35:26and you followed her homology to ask her to marry you, I know, I know, I know,
35:31I might be young, but I guess I'm an old romantic, she sounds like an old slag by the sound of it,
35:38she said our fling was a mistake and she's back with her husband, oh shit, I'm all alone in
35:44Benidorm, no friends, nowhere to go, rubbish, me and Liam, I'll look after you and I'm gonna start
35:51by making you feel like the young, vibrant, gorgeous, sexy man that you are, dear god,
35:57Kenneth, control yourself, the boy is straight, I'm gonna cut his hair, you dickhead,
36:05right, now I am sensing a reverse layer pompadour with high-faded sides,
36:11a what, do you reckon, whatever you think, as long as it comes to a vodka and coke,
36:16Liam, two vodka and cokes, just shut down, all right,
36:27when I think back on these times and the dreams we left behind,
36:35I'll be glad because I was blessed to get to have you in my life,
36:42when I look back on these days, I look and see your face,
36:48Ryan, you okay? I'm not upset, no, you don't look it,
36:56I'm so lucky to have found someone, oh, I often think that, hang on, what do you mean?
37:02Kenneth, Kenneth, are you serious? Wait, wait, we're not, sorry, I thought you two were, no,
37:12no, just, no, sorry, still, when you do find someone, at least these days you can get married,
37:25what do you mean these days? Oh, we've come so far, marriage should be for everyone,
37:30now it is, gay marriage, oh, I'm not gay,
37:37Liam, I'm sorry, Liam, I'm sorry, I'm not offended, I'm just not gay, right,
38:04I'm sorry, I'm basically Liam, a green coke,
38:09gin and tonic and a Malibu and pineapple with extra cherries and an umbrella, good drink,
38:18it's a nice drink, did you say anything?
38:22I am totally Liam, I come across it in the wrong way to a lot of people, I start off annoying and
38:29people then kind of get to know me and know that I'm quite nice, I'm flamboyant, I mean,
38:36I love his shirts, I absolutely love, I love Liam's shirts, I'm not gonna lie,
38:40and obviously I'm not quite the ginger in it, but I like to think I rock a half decent
38:46bit of facial stubble, you know, and I often get mistaken for being gay,
38:53so I am Liam, if there's one character in this show that I identify the most with,
39:00it's Liam, and I'm fine with that, and to be fair, it is a nice drink, Malibu and pineapple,
39:08love pineapple, love a bit of coconut, come on, let's go and find one, oh, wow, nice,
39:17hmm, if she's singing, I need another drink, you haven't heard her lately, she's much better,
39:24isn't she, Billy, goon, I had a smashing voice when I were a lass, unfortunately too many drinks
39:32and ciggies have put paid to that, plus all the late nights, not to mention the early mornings,
39:38getting back home, it's been a long time since I've done the walk of shame, Billy,
39:43no, you just call it walking now, don't you, you just drop it, my mother said it was a joke
39:48earlier about shacking up with that young lad, yeah, just drop it, Billy, you're like a broken
39:53record, I saw you, I beg your pardon, I saw you this morning when I was on my way to see
40:02if our Rob was all right, I saw you leave that lad's room, Tiger's room,
40:14that doesn't prove anything, I mean, it's pretty damn inevitable, dropping off a morning paper,
40:24right, who's singing tonight,
40:26right, can I sing, I'll be happy to do a bit of karaoke,
40:32Nanna, what about you, you're always up for it, oh, don't tempt me,
40:45what can I get you, something very large and very strong, anything to drink,
40:50oh,
41:05all over it, I'll bring it to your table, thank you,
41:12don't mention it,
41:15you look happy, did you find his cases, no, but I've got 100 euros coming in,
41:19that'll shut him up until his real payment of 150 euro comes in, leaving me a tidy 50,
41:26it's not what you do, it's the way that you do it, Leslie, all right for some,
41:39lovely, beautiful voice there, great song,
41:42Jenny Dorm's own Charlene there, we'll hear more from her later,
41:48but now it's karaoke time, let's hear it for Jodie Dawson, come on Jodie, please,
41:56you can't be any worse than last year, I mean, to be fair, Let It Go is a hard song to me,
42:04it's a beautiful night, we're looking for something dumb to do, straight away much better,
42:11hey baby, I think I want to marry you,
42:17you're not going to be sick again are you, no mate,
42:20Loretta helped me into my room, but she didn't get into my bed, you said you remember her face
42:27being like this far away from yours, she was tucking me in, that's what they used to call it,
42:33she tucked me into bed, then I was so drunk, I thought she was my gran,
42:43and I said don't leave me gran, don't leave me, and then she said I won't leave you son,
42:51don't worry, I'm sitting right here, and then I said gran, why have you got a northern accent,
42:57and then I fell asleep, she must have done the same in the chair, wow, hiya lads, all excited
43:06about your trip to Ibiza end of week, Ibiza, oh yeah, I completely forgot to tell you, I booked
43:11us on a free trip to Ibiza, oh my days, you legend, excuse me, excuse me, what do you mean
43:18free trip to Ibiza, you can't forgotten about it, you literally just mentioned it, I never said it
43:22was free, I'm here to collect your 100 euro deposit, 100 euros, we ain't got 100 euros,
43:28we're on all inclusive, tag, tag, leave this to me, when I spoke to you today, you said do you
43:33want to talk about the free trips you had on offer, why did you think this trip was free,
43:38I gave you the leaflet to read, plus it said I haven't got my cash box, but we could sort out
43:41the details tonight, I thought you gave us spending money, oh my god, just how stupid can one person
43:48be, you ain't heard nothing yet, this is just the tip of the ice cube,
43:53morons, the pair of you, total and absolute morons, hey, no need to be like that,
44:00so we going to Ibiza or not, I don't think so mate,
44:08she's not bad, she could do with showing a bit of leg though, mother she's nine,
44:12I've got to admit that stage girl's done the world of good for her,
44:25now it's been worth every penny to pay for our Geordie schooling, only the best for my
44:30granddaughter, you paid for it to go to stage school, yeah, Eddie Dawson, the tightest man
45:07to piss about singing and acting daft, you agreed to pay for Geordie schooling,
45:12do you think she was going to leave school when she was 10, can we talk about this later,
45:16one year, one year I agreed to pay for it drama school, she can sing and shower from now on like
45:23rest on us, when it comes to my grandchildren,
45:27I'll tell you the problem you've all got, if you all don't shut up and stop behaving like human
45:46beings, you'll all be out on your ear, do you understand, yeah, I'm talking to all of you,
45:58oh, she's put her foot down,
46:15much better Geordie, go on,
46:18oh, that was brilliant, Darren, you were fantastic,
46:32says we're going to do harmonies next year, then I'll be able to sing with Rob,
46:40I'm going to have an early night, oh, me as well, I'll see you all tomorrow,
46:48what did he say, poor Geordie, she never catches a break when she sings does she,
47:07I'm sorry, I'm sorry Kenneth, can I just say something, I don't know, can you,
47:14I'm so sorry for assuming that you were both gay,
47:22he's talking about I am gay, he's one pina colada away from making it,
47:28I mean I've suffered from prejudice too, just because I like older women, but it's just a
47:35preference, what I think is, what I think, I think I'm going to be sick,
47:46you know, I better go, Kenneth, Liam, oh, thank you so much for all your kindness,
47:56oh, Kenneth, Kenneth, my taxi's up there for tomorrow morning, right,
48:02oh, yeah, yeah, I forgot about that, yeah, yeah, thank you, thank you so much,
48:11oh God, so he came to Pendle for one dine, right, I need a drink, me too, oh, Jacqueline,
48:20oh my God, we forgot about you, oh, don't worry about me, I'm here now,
48:25what's happened to you, you look like you've been thrown from a bus, I didn't get the bus,
48:30I walked, what from Alicante, well, when you weren't at the airport, oh, it's such a lovely
48:36day, and it's not that far if you take the coastal road, it's only taken me eight hours,
48:44oh, Jacqueline, I am so sorry, oh, don't worry, I didn't walk all the way, I got a lift from
48:52El Campeo to Cala La Nusa from a very nice farmer, I gave him something for his trouble,
49:00so I had quite a spring in me step for the last 12 miles, I cannot believe you forgot about
49:12Jacqueline, me, what about you, I wasn't the one supposed to get from the airport,
49:17she was delayed, what was I supposed to do, wait there all day,
49:35oh, no,
49:35oh,
49:36oh,
49:41are you okay, yeah, I'm fine, thank you,
49:48I need to get back to my hotel, but I'm not feeling too well, where are you staying,
49:55um, the Beltoro, so am I, I fancy sharing the cab, yeah, great, I'm Ryan, I'm Loretta,
50:07come on, let's get you up, I think she doesn't want to get him up,
50:13he's safe with me, is he, I'm sure you don't make a habit of taking young men home, well,
50:27yes, it is Phil Dunster, I knew it, I knew, I knew it was Phil Dunster, oh,
50:33yes, Jamie Tutt, Jamie Tutt, Jamie Tutt, oh, oh, yeah, like I said, yeah, if you've not seen
50:44Ted Lasso, please at some point, you know, you've got to watch it, it's three, three series of
50:52just, first of all, the best depiction of mental health that I've ever seen in any,
51:00um, at any version of the, of media, it is hilariously funny, um, of course, we have, um,
51:08someone who, who is on the channel as well, um, the, um, um, the, the guy who plays, um, Barry in
51:17the smoking room, uh, he, he also plays, um, um, Phil, um, Leslie Higgins in that show,
51:26Hannah Waddingham, who we have, of course, have had in Benidorm, um, you know, she played Tonya,
51:32um, she is in that, uh, as a, as a major character, and she is amazing, seriously amazing,
51:40um, seriously, I, I cannot praise Ted Lasso highly enough, he's just one of those, like,
51:45if you haven't seen, you need to see it, it is honestly one of the best shows I've ever seen,
51:52the story arc is amazing, uh, you, it's basically, they always planned it to be,
51:57like, a three series kind of arc, and, and everything to kind of come together,
52:02the, the, there's a lot of fans who wanted to come back with, with a, with a four series,
52:07and there's rumours that it may be coming back, but of course, it does rely on, uh, Jason Stathis,
52:12who is the, the creator, and he, of course, he plays the, the lead character, Ted Lasso,
52:17and it, it really wouldn't really work without him, you know, I mean, I'm not, I'm not gonna say,
52:21but yeah, it's an amazing song, amazing show, rather, sorry, not a song, and I'm going off
52:26tangent, I'm sorry, um, but yes, um, this episode, I really enjoyed, I, I, I really did, yes, again,
52:34you know, like, like, I felt for a little while now that there is some, some duff moments,
52:40I'll call it, you know, where, where they're making some characters a bit too dumb, which I'm,
52:44I'm personally not on board with, I, you know, I like really sharp, witty dialogue, but yeah,
52:51there's, there's a few times it, yeah, it doesn't quite work for me, um, but it still has some good
52:58moments in it, um, so Loretta is a very, very interesting, um, character, so, so, obviously,
53:10a lot of people, I think, are going to compare the Dawsons to the Garvey family, um, and a lot
53:17of those comparisons would definitely have come from Sharon and Eddie, again, that sort of, you
53:23know, in-law to in-law kind of rivalry thing, we've now added a second one, so we've basically
53:31got the Sharon and Eddie clash, we've got the Billy and Loretta clash, but we've also got the
53:41Eddie and Loretta clash, so you've got, you know, a three-way clash, where they're all kind of
53:47intermingling with one another, to almost work out who's going to be hated the most, um, I, I,
53:55I think she adds an interesting dynamic to the, to the family, and adding her in there, I'm not
54:00gonna lie, um, otherwise, just, just a solid episode, it was pretty good, yeah, it's not gonna
54:10be top tier, it's not, we're, we can see that it's on the decline, um, uh, yeah, yeah, uh, I mean,
54:20Sam, Sam is adding an interesting dynamic, um, yeah, making some, some kind of younger kind of
54:27vibe stuff, Joey is just an idiot, uh, at the moment, I'm not warming to him in the way that I
54:33warmed to Liam, as they sort of developed him at the moment, it doesn't feel like they're giving
54:37any development to Joey, he just feels like, he's a dumb character, and that's it, he's literally a
54:44one-track pony, you know, um, so yeah, I'd like to see more development for Joey, if I, if I'm gonna
54:51warm to him, I mean, he's, he's not bad, he's just, he's like, meh, uh, if he's there, he's all right,
54:58yeah, but some of, some of his stuff is just a cringey kind of comedy, you know, um, and we've
55:04brought back Jacqueline, so at this moment, she is definitely the, the longest serving cast member,
55:10um, obviously, Mattea has been in every single episode, Jacqueline, I, if I remember correctly,
55:15I think she's been in every episode bar one, which was literally last episode out, um, which is a,
55:23you know, an interesting, interesting, uh, situation there, um, so yeah, that's gonna do it,
55:30uh, for this latest reaction to, uh, Dependable, which is, of course, my last video, um, for, um,
55:37for, for September, so thank you for that, um, of course, today, there's also gonna be a video
55:43where I talk about my plans for October, feel free to check that out, um, and I'll talk about some of
55:48my plans for next month, but obviously, in terms of Benidorm, we'll be back every week, on every
55:52Monday, unless I move a video around, um, because it might be next month, actually, let me just
55:58quickly double check, um, I think, um, yes, so not next week's episode, um, episode three, but the week
56:08after the, um, the episode four of this, I am moving it to the Tuesday for one week only, the
56:17reason that I'm doing that, um, is, uh, next month, I would be doing, um, Knowing Me, Knowing You, episode
56:23five, and I'm going to do that on the 14th of October, which is a Monday, uh, the reason I'm
56:30doing that is it will be the 30th anniversary of that episode, it originally aired on the 14th of
56:35October, uh, whatever, 1994, I think, um, so yeah, that is literally the one and only reason I'm moving it
56:44for that week, otherwise, it's Monday, as always, so some people may, uh, may, may forget, and I'll try
56:49and remind people next week, as well, but there you go, there's an advance warning, uh, as for that, but
56:55thank you, once again, for joining me for Benidorm, I hope you enjoyed it, please subscribe if you're new,
57:00drop your comments down below, subscribe, turn on notifications, consider joining the Patreon,
57:04all the usual bits and bobs, but for now, my name's Kevin, I'm a geek,
57:07and you've been watching Kevin the Geek, goodbye.