• le mois dernier
Transcription
00:00Ladies and gentlemen, to announce this year's Oscar nominees, Mr. Peanutbutter!
00:16Mr. Peanutbutter!
00:20Mr. Peanutbutter?
00:25Hello! Here I am, Mr. Peanutbutter. That's my name and I am here.
00:29Ok! The nominees! Nominees for Oscar. Who are the nominees?
00:34Well, as I used to say on Hollywood Stars and Celebrities, what do they know? Do they know things? Let's find out! Let's find out!
00:41For Best Actor, the nominees are...
00:43George Clooners for The Nazi Who Played Yahtzee,
00:46Red Poop for City of AIDS,
00:48Colin Firth for First Things First, The Colin Firth Story,
00:51Michael Fassbender for... I want to say Bill Gates,
00:54and BoJack Horseman for Secretariat.
01:00BoJack, you just got nominated for an Oscar. You're an Oscar nominee. How do you feel?
01:05I feel... I feel... I feel... the same.
01:29I feel... I feel... I feel... the same.
02:00It happened again. Why do I keep thinking things will make me happy? What is wrong with me?
02:04BoJack, don't do this. Don't fetishize your own sadness.
02:07Oh, God. I'm drowning. I feel like I'm drowning.
02:10BoJack, listen. When I was 17, I snuck out to a fraternity party.
02:15The roads were icy and I swerved into the lake.
02:21I came to underwater. It was dark and cold and I didn't even know which way was up.
02:27I thought for sure I was going to drown.
02:30And then I noticed, when I opened my mouth, the air bubbles floated up
02:37and that's how I knew which way to swim.
02:41That is a terrifying story.
02:42BoJack, when you find yourself lost and disoriented and underwater
02:46and you don't know which way is up, it's important to breathe.
02:50I don't deserve this. I'm not a best actor.
02:53I don't deserve this. I'm not a best actor.
02:55Awards aren't about who's best, BoJack.
02:57That's literally the only thing they're about.
02:59No. All this means is that you're one of the special people.
03:02I saw it the first time I met you. You must have known it all your life.
03:06And all your life, people told you that you were wrong, that you weren't special,
03:10that you were just like everybody else.
03:12But now, the special people are saying, you were right, BoJack. You were right.
03:17I was right. I am one of the special people.
03:20Yes.
03:21What are we doing just sitting here? I just got nominated for an Oscar.
03:24We gotta party like it's 1982, the year Prince released 1999.
03:29BoJack, your complimentary Rolex is here.
03:53BoJack, giant chocolate Oscar's here.
03:56Famous DJ David Guetta is at the door.
04:00Free Tesla's here, Boj. They wanna know if they can park it in your driveway.
04:03No. Tell them I want my free Tesla parked in my goddamn living room. I'm BoJack.
04:14Yeah, now we're doing it.
04:16Look at us partying.
04:19BoJack, you got another delivery. Someone sent a... nerd?
04:23Hi.
04:27You get a load of this chili cheese fountain? Grab a handful of beans and go to town.
04:30Hey, this is all really something.
04:32But I actually just came because I heard about the nomination and I wanted to make sure you're okay.
04:36That's a funny way of saying congratulations. But not funny ha ha. More like funny... Doonesbury.
04:40I know how this kind of thing can sometimes send you spinning.
04:43Oh God, why doesn't this make me happy? Will anything make me happy? I'm an empty husk.
04:47That kind of thing.
04:48Well, thank you for that. But I'm actually doing great.
04:50I direct your attention to the aforementioned chili cheese fountain.
04:55It's too bad I'm not managing your social campaign anymore because this party would make a great Snapchat story.
05:00You are not gonna make me feel guilty about leaving Princess Carolyn.
05:02I'm not here to make you feel guilty, like I said.
05:04Honestly, I don't even know what you're doing over there. Tweeting for celebrities?
05:07Well, actually, I don't...
05:08When I met you, you were so cool and interesting.
05:10I was never cool.
05:11You used to actually care about shit. What happened?
05:14I don't know, Bojack. Maybe caring about shit got old.
05:17Maybe I'm tired of everyone yelling at me and sending death threats to my house,
05:20and all my friends thinking I'm annoying, and getting in fights with my husband,
05:23and seeing little refugee boys die in hospital bombings.
05:26It's exhausting and I can't do it.
05:27And if that makes me a bad person, then I'm sorry that I'm not the cool, interesting girl...
05:31I never said you were a bad person. I just said it's not you.
05:34And you know it's not you.
05:35Oh, and this party is you? Who are all these people?
05:38These are my friends.
05:39Name one of them.
05:40Tess... Lee.
05:41You're just looking at the Tesla.
05:42I don't know why it's so hard for you to believe that I could be happy.
05:44I'm not like you, okay? I don't fetishize my own sadness.
05:47I don't fetishize my own sadness.
05:50Sure.
05:52You don't know anything about me.
05:56Hey! I know that you can tweet for a living in a house in Beverly Hills that your husband bought,
06:00or you can think you're better than everyone, but you can't do both.
06:03I don't think I'm better than everyone!
06:05And again, I say, sure.
06:07You know what's gonna happen? You're gonna win that Oscar.
06:09And you're gonna go up on that stage and give your little speech, and then you're gonna go home.
06:13And you're gonna be so miserable, you'll wanna kill yourself.
06:16And you're gonna have nobody left to stop you.
06:20Hey, it's BoJack!
06:21BoJack! BoJack!
06:23No one's gonna be there when I kill myself?
06:25Listen to that chanting, Diane.
06:27The chanting don't lie.
06:29There's gonna be plenty of people around when I kill myself.
06:33Tell your readers that BoJack was sleeping.
06:35They didn't even know they were announced today.
06:38Okay. Goodbye, Heather.
06:40Hey, Anna, can I ask you something?
06:42Of course, darling.
06:43So, if I win the Oscar...
06:44When you win the Oscar.
06:46Right, but after that, what's gonna happen to us?
06:48What do you mean?
06:49What we have. It's more than just an Oscar campaign, right?
06:52I need to go.
06:53What?
06:54There's work to be done. We got the nomination, but now the real battle begins.
06:57Enjoy your party. Stop worrying about the future.
07:09Come on, buddy. Come on.
07:14Mr. Peanutbutter!
07:15Thank God you're okay.
07:16Better than okay. I'm wonderful.
07:17Thanks to you, you wonderful man.
07:19When you said my name this morning, you changed my life.
07:21About that...
07:22Hey, did you see Erica here?
07:23She was looking for you.
07:24You're in trouble.
07:25Erica?
07:26Erica?
07:27Erica?
07:28Erica?
07:29Erica?
07:30Erica?
07:31Erica?
07:32Erica?
07:33Erica?
07:34Erica?
07:35Erica?
07:36Erica?
07:37Did you see Erica here?
07:38She was looking for you earlier, with her good eye.
07:40Her other eye was looking to the stars.
07:42Bojack, I need to talk to you.
07:43Yeah? What's going on, buddy?
07:44Well, I've got good news.
07:46And I've got bad news.
07:55Raven on a wire.
07:56A gloomy portent precariously perched.
07:59And as the sun sets, so does it spread its deathly shadow
08:03just and unjust of the outdoor seating area of the California Pizza Kitchen.
08:09And what better way to view such disquieting omens
08:11than through these gorgeous floor-to-ceiling windows.
08:14Yeah, wow.
08:15They really make regular windows look like shit.
08:18I can't look out the window while lying on the floor?
08:21No thank you, regular window!
08:23Tell me a little about your company.
08:24Well, it started as a safe space for women.
08:27Then, it became a safe space for women and men.
08:31Oh!
08:32Now, it's more of a safe-ish space for women
08:35and a really safe space for men to look at women
08:39while also being driven around by them.
08:41Wow, something for everyone.
08:43Demand is skyrocketing.
08:44That's why we need a bigger office space.
08:46You come to work, clock in, you put sugar in your coffee
08:49and watch it slowly disappear into nothingness.
08:52But the sugar doesn't know why.
08:53Sugar didn't ask to be born.
08:55Is he okay?
08:56He recently found out that his brother's sick.
08:58Oh, I'm so sorry.
08:59But you know what else is sick?
09:00These hardwood floors.
09:01Oh, did you hear that, Mr. Peanutbutter?
09:09Losing Bojack was a blow.
09:10There's no way to sugarcoat it.
09:11Even if I were generally good at sugarcoating things,
09:13which I am not.
09:14You know, I wish cats really did have nine lives.
09:17It would make me feel better about how much I'm screwing up this one.
09:19You're not screwing up your life.
09:21Sometimes I feel like if I could start everything over,
09:23knowing what I know now, I'd do it all right this time.
09:26But other times I think, no, I wouldn't.
09:32Comme vous le savez, les choses ont été difficiles.
09:34Malheureusement, nous devons renforcer notre équipe,
09:36surtout vous.
09:37Vous me tirez ?
09:39En un sens, oui.
09:40Mais dans un autre sens,
09:41je vous promets de trouver un emploi
09:44quelque part d'autre.
09:45Oui.
09:46Je ne pense pas que j'ai jamais remercié vous
09:47de me donner ce travail en premier lieu.
09:49C'était un honneur de travailler avec vous.
09:51Vous étiez le meilleur coordonnateur social
09:53que cette entreprise ait jamais eu.
09:57Est-ce que tu es sûr que tu as besoin d'une opération ?
09:59Est-ce que tu peux avoir une deuxième opinion ?
10:00Tu sais qu'il n'y a qu'un médecin sur la péninsule.
10:02Je pourrais en demander deux fois
10:03si ça te rend mieux.
10:04Rien ne me rend mieux en ce moment.
10:06Pas même une opportunité de carrière.
10:08Attends, je reçois un autre appel.
10:09Je dois prendre ça.
10:10Ça pourrait être une opportunité de carrière.
10:11Bonjour, Mr. Peanutbutter.
10:13C'est Chef Von Trapp,
10:14le producteur de l'award show.
10:16C'est une opportunité de carrière qui est...
10:20bonne.
10:21Ce n'est pas le moment, Chef.
10:22Pouvez-vous me répondre ?
10:23Absolument pas.
10:24L'annonce de nomination d'Oscar
10:26est dans 7 jours.
10:27Et nous n'avons pas d'hôte.
10:28Malheureusement, Jimmy Fallon s'est cassé le visage.
10:31Quoi ?
10:32Halloween en janvier ?
10:33Quel concept fou !
10:34Je ne peux pas y croire !
10:35Qu'est-ce que c'est ?
10:36Barry Gibb serait comme
10:37« Je vais y aller ! »
10:38Non.
10:39Tout d'abord,
10:40je dois prendre une selfie avec ce truc.
10:42Je suis Jimmy Fallon !
10:45Et vous êtes notre premier choix
10:46après notre premier premier choix
10:48qui a été attaqué par un boss.
10:49Vous êtes notre deuxième premier choix.
10:50Qu'est-ce que vous en pensez ?
10:51Oh...
10:52Un travail comme celui-là,
10:53vous voulez une présenteuse
10:54totalement présente pour présenter.
10:55Et je ne sais pas si j'ai le goût
10:57de prendre ce défilé
10:58où il faut aller, vous savez.
10:59J'ai un peu de mal au pied.
11:00D'accord, alors laissez-moi savoir.
11:01Parce que si vous ne voulez pas le faire,
11:02nous allons probablement juste poster
11:03une liste de nominés en ligne
11:04ou quelque chose.
11:05Ce n'est vraiment pas si important.
11:06Hey, désolé.
11:07J'ai eu un appel de l'Oscar.
11:08Ils veulent que je présente...
11:09Ils veulent que VOUS présentez l'Oscar ?
11:12Une annonce de nomination.
11:13Mais je ne pense pas
11:14que je l'ai en moi en ce moment.
11:15T'es sérieux ?
11:16Vous devez prendre ce défilé.
11:17Vraiment ?
11:18Monsieur Beignet.
11:19Qu'est-ce que Nana Beignet
11:20a toujours dit ?
11:22Always take every opportunity
11:23that comes your way
11:24because opportunities
11:25are like sneezes from God
11:26and when God sneezes
11:27you can't say
11:28God bless you to God
11:29so instead you have to
11:30take the opportunity
11:31I'm cold,
11:32will you pass me that blanket ?
11:33Boy, that old gal
11:34had something for everything,
11:35didn't she ?
11:36I know you're worried about me
11:37but sitting around the house
11:38worrying isn't going to help anyone.
11:39OK.
11:40But you'll call me
11:41when you get out of the surgery, right ?
11:42I'm not going to let my phone
11:43leave my sight.
11:44Of course.
11:45And now,
11:46I've got something new to live for.
11:47My little brother
11:48telling the whole world
11:49who got an Oscar.
11:50Nomination.
11:54We are minutes away.
11:55Chef,
11:56release the envelope.
11:57Copy that,
11:58releasing the envelope.
12:00It's go time.
12:03It's go time.
12:04Are you ready,
12:05brother Pricewaterhouse ?
12:06Of course,
12:07what about housekeepers ?
12:14Mr. Peanutbutter,
12:15we'd like to invite you
12:16to the stage.
12:17It's here,
12:18the golden envelope.
12:21Mr. Peanutbutter ?
12:22OK.
12:23Oh, my phone.
12:24What should I do with it, Todd ?
12:25Maybe you should hold it.
12:26No, I'll take it with me.
12:27No, you hold it.
12:28Sure thing, yeah.
12:29No, put it in my jacket pocket.
12:30Right here ?
12:31Oh no, it's a fake pocket.
12:32Tricked again.
12:33Todd, it's ringing.
12:34This is it.
12:35Oh no, my phone.
12:36Oh no, I kicked it
12:37right through that doorway
12:38into the hallway.
12:39Now other people are kicking it
12:40and it's sliding across the floor.
12:41OK, this is getting absurd.
12:42Let's get that phone.
12:43Mr. Peanutbutter,
12:44you have been invited
12:45to the stage.
12:46Mr. Peanutbutter's house.
12:48Who's that guy ?
12:49Don't kick the floor.
12:50Peanutbutter,
12:51nick-nack, paddywhack,
12:52give a dog a bone.
12:53Who's that guy ?
12:54Mr. Peanutbutter,
12:55trying to catch a rain check,
12:56leave a dog a bone.
12:57There it goes.
12:59Sorry, if you could just
13:00put my phone away.
13:01Oh, damn it,
13:02I can't shoot.
13:05He's a good looking guy.
13:07He's just trying to
13:08do his job.
13:09No, no, no, no, no, no.
13:10That way.
13:14Come on, phone,
13:15just stop.
13:16Who's that guy ?
13:17Mr. Peanutbutter,
13:18nick-nack, paddywhack,
13:19give a dog a bone.
13:22Hello.
13:23Mr. Peanutbutter,
13:24I just,
13:25I wanted to give you a chance
13:26to say goodbye.
13:27Oh, no.
13:28To my twisted spleen,
13:29because it was successfully
13:30removed from my body.
13:32Oh, my God,
13:33that's incredible.
13:34Now, get out there
13:35and announce those Oscars.
13:36Nominations.
13:37You got it, buddy.
13:38OK,
13:39now where's the,
13:40the,
13:41uh-oh,
13:42could have sworn it was right here.
13:44Ah, ah, ah.
13:45There you are.
13:46You need to get on stage.
13:47Yes,
13:48just as soon as you give me
13:49that back-up envelope,
13:50please and por favor.
13:51What back-up envelope ?
13:52There is no back-up envelope.
13:54That was a test
13:55and you passed.
13:56Wunderbar.
13:57Now, let's get you out there.
13:58Yes, gotta get out there.
13:59On to the stage
14:00to announce the nominations.
14:01Just as soon as I...
14:02Oh, my God,
14:03is that Bradley Cooper ?
14:04Bradley Cooper ?
14:05We love him for some reason.
14:06Where ?
14:07Let's go, Tom.
14:09Oh, God, what do we do ?
14:10It's OK.
14:11We just need to come up
14:12with all the nominees ourselves.
14:13But I haven't even seen
14:14all the movies.
14:15Todd, nobody has.
14:16That's not how they
14:17give out awards.
14:18But time for talk is over.
14:19Now is the time for action.
14:20And by action,
14:21I mean talking about
14:22these 24 categories
14:23until we've settled
14:24on a list of nominees.
14:25You need to tell me right now,
14:26are you in or out ?
14:27Well, when you put it that way,
14:28I guess you can call me
14:29high-waisted denim
14:31because right now,
14:32I am very in.
14:33Let's do this.
14:35What did you think
14:36of Frida Pinto ?
14:37Are you kidding me ?
14:38Anybody could do what she did.
14:39Don't take my baby.
14:40I'll give you
14:41all my bitcoins.
14:42Wow.
14:43That is good.
14:44OK, for best picture,
14:45what about Avatar ?
14:46That was a good movie.
14:47True.
14:48But did that come out
14:49this year ?
14:50I feel like I just saw it.
14:51Well, there's no way
14:52to know for sure.
14:53Let's just throw it on the list.
14:54Oh, do we have
14:55Daniel Day-Lewis
14:56down for anything ?
14:57He's always there.
14:58Good catch.
14:59I'll add him.
15:00Daniel Day-Lewis.
15:01OK, we need one more
15:02nominee for best actor.
15:03Oh, what about BoJack ?
15:04His performance in Secretariat
15:05was as thoughtful
15:06and self-aware
15:07as we've ever seen him.
15:08Besides, he's our friend.
15:09Is he ?
15:10I'm surprised to hear
15:11you say that, Todd Chavez.
15:12Let's dig into that.
15:13We have time.
15:14I don't think we do.
15:15You're supposed to be
15:16announcing these like now.
15:17There is always time
15:18to talk about our feelings.
15:19As my nana
15:20peanut butter used to say,
15:21there's always time
15:22to talk about feelings
15:23because feelings
15:24are the ceilings
15:25of our hearts
15:26and a leaky feeling ceiling
15:27leads to a flood of blood
15:28and I'm cold.
15:29Will you pass me that blanket ?
15:30Well, I guess I'm just tired
15:31of BoJack walking
15:32all over everybody
15:33and still
15:34getting everything
15:35he wants.
15:36I think the important thing
15:37to remember here
15:38is that BoJack
15:39is a damaged individual
15:40struggling against
15:41a sea of demons.
15:42Many self-created
15:43but still all too real.
15:44Getting this nomination
15:45from the two friends
15:46he loves the most,
15:47you and also me,
15:48would really mean
15:49a lot to him.
15:50Okay.
15:51But did you really think
15:52he was that good in the movie ?
15:53Oh, I haven't seen it.
15:54It seemed long.
15:56And the final nominee
15:57for Best Picture
15:58is Avatar.
15:59Well, those are
16:00all the nominations.
16:01I will not be taking
16:02any questions.
16:03Goodbye.
16:04I must go.
16:07I gotta say,
16:08you picked some
16:09top-notch noms.
16:10You know it.
16:11Boy, was I glad
16:12when we got out
16:13of that theater, though.
16:14I know.
16:15So many questions.
16:16Oh, what the hell happened ?
16:17Why were you reading
16:18off that napkin ?
16:19Why are you guys running ?
16:21They have their nominees.
16:22What more could they want ?
16:23You know what's crazy ?
16:24We saved the day today
16:26and no one
16:27will ever even know.
16:29Hey, we'll know.
16:32Mr. Peanutbutter,
16:33we know what you did.
16:35Oh, boy.
16:36So,
16:37the good news is
16:38my brother's surgery
16:39was a success.
16:40And the bad news is
16:41you're not nominated
16:42for an Oscar.
16:43And the other good news
16:44is that each breath
16:45is a gift
16:46and it is a joy to live.
16:47What ?
16:48We are so lucky
16:49we get to be alive.
16:50No, before that.
16:51Oh, I didn't tell you.
16:52My brother's been sick.
16:53No, I don't care
16:54about your brother.
16:55First of all, manners.
16:56Second of all,
16:57I think if you met him,
16:58you'd actually really
16:59hit it off.
17:00Imagine me,
17:01but with less
17:02in-your-face-cool-guy attitude.
17:03Did you say I'm not
17:04nominated for an Oscar ?
17:05A lot of people
17:06say that,
17:07but I feel like
17:08what everyone's
17:09overlooking here is
17:10I got most of the categories
17:11dead on.
17:12That's pretty amazing
17:13and I am not getting
17:14enough credit for that.
17:15Did you know that
17:16Avatar came out in 2009 ?
17:17I'm not nominated
17:18for an Oscar.
17:19No, but you know
17:20what they say,
17:21it's an honor
17:22just to be nominated.
17:23Oh, wait.
17:24So, I'm just
17:25like everybody else.
17:26I know you're upset,
17:27but whatever you do,
17:28please don't get mad at Todd.
17:29Why would I get mad at Todd ?
17:30Exactly.
17:31This is totally my fault.
17:32He didn't even want
17:33to nominate you.
17:34What ?
17:36What ?
17:37What is it ?
17:38None of this matters.
17:39Okay, I'll see you
17:40later, buddy.
17:41Whistling
17:47As a partner in the company,
17:48I am prepared to forego
17:49my salary for the next
17:50three months,
17:51but even then,
17:52we're going to need
17:53some sort of miracle.
17:54What are we doing ?
17:55What was the point
17:56of any of this ?
17:57I wasted everyone's time
17:58for six months.
17:59Soon, I'll get some offer
18:00from one of the big
18:01five agencies
18:02that I can't say no to
18:03and I'll go back
18:04to being another cog
18:05in the giant
18:06Play-Doh spaghetti maker
18:07that is this industry.
18:08Is that the best
18:09I can hope for ?
18:10Not necessarily,
18:11although there is one thing
18:12I should probably mention.
18:13What is it, Judah ?
18:14Maybe this is an opportunity
18:16to live one of your
18:18other eight lives.
18:19Yeah.
18:20Maybe.
18:21It's been a pleasure
18:22working with you, Judah.
18:24I found it to be
18:25an above-average experience.
18:26Please forgive me
18:27for getting emotional.
18:28Sigh
18:29Sigh
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Recommandations