Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about an e-mail from a listener who spotted something strange in the campground bathroom. A man was seductively brushing his teeth and he wants to know if he should tell the guy's wife.
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00:00this guy sent us an email over the weekend he's camping right now and he said i'm camping with
00:11my wife and two kids last night had to make a late night trip to the bathrooms just before bed
00:16i walked in not really paying much attention to anyone else in the bathroom but i did notice a
00:21guy brushing his teeth at one of the sinks well i sat down i do my business i quickly noticed the
00:28sounds of someone gagging but i didn't really think too much about it finish up go to wash my
00:35hands there are two guys at the sinks first guy is nervously washing his hands trying not to make
00:41eye contact with anyone then i look over at the second guy and instantly realize why that guy is
00:47still brushing his teeth he's shirtless in short shorts absolutely deep throating his toothbrush
00:56that's how you do it he had been brushing his teeth the whole time i was in the bathroom
01:01which took a bit toothpaste is foaming from his mouth and running down his face onto his chest
01:07his eyes are locked on the guy washing his hands oh wow i assume he's there looking for something
01:15else to gag on that's what i would and i skipped washing my hands and got the hell out of there
01:20oh you pooped man though but yeah you pooped though bud that's a takeaway um uh next day
01:26go to the bathroom again this mother effer is back in there doing the same thing trying to make eye
01:34contact with anyone who will watch i make my way to the stall take several minutes as i'm walking out
01:42the guy is still there deep throating his toothbrush letting toothpaste ooze all over it
01:48pretty hot pretty hot so far is that like a gay pickup thing i don't know deep throat in your toothbrush
01:58okay well um i guess i have to equate this with would i watch an attractive woman do this
02:07deep throated toothbrush i think i would yeah i think i probably and have it all pouring out
02:13that's insane like an attractive woman attractive woman would i watch her brush her teeth and even
02:18if she was doing that stuff and making some of those sounds yeah i didn't think i'd call her silly
02:23well that's fine you can call her silly i'd be like you're silly i'm not gonna interrupt her though
02:29she might be i'm like god you're so kind of hot kind of gross yeah it's a mix it's kind of gross
02:35i'm just saying i know myself it's like a chick that like wants to be hot but doesn't quite
02:41understand what's up or her or just her idea of hot is or she's twisted up hot enough she doesn't
02:49need to do that right no exactly you don't need to dethrote a toothbrush no no like why are you doing
02:56that baby at the campground bathroom which by the way everyone knows campground bathrooms are the
03:02worst places on the earth there really are like just one step above a rest area bathroom aren't
03:07they yeah honestly i've never been i think they're worse i think they're dirtier they're filled with
03:13more spiders and spiders and yeah cobwebs and unknown spots so you know like i did my little
03:21camping my little metal detecting camping was it camping or were you in a cabin we were in cabins
03:26we're in like an a-frame cabin all right um but it you know the bathrooms are communal inside like
03:32of a lodge area right not great right so i'm like okay go into the bathroom i get ready to turn the
03:40water on and then it hits me what the smell of oh no eight or nine other men who have already woken up
03:48early and taken giant deuces and filled up an entire bathroom it doesn't air out those places
03:53right they don't have the ventilation it's like a fortress yeah it's it's steamy it is it's it's
04:01moist air that traps in all the it's a hot steamy turd factory yes and they you know the truth is your
04:11smell and taste are connected are quite linked yeah and i had to brush my teeth you just deep
04:19throated and brush for half an hour in a fog of poop jesus god you gotta do the quickest
04:24it was just yeah it was just uh get it over with i'm not i would have brushed outside just just clean
04:30wet my toothbrush yeah i mean it wouldn't have been a bad idea but i can't throw it yeah at the
04:35camp the cabin right outside your tent i'm all yeah he did i do all that i'm staring trying to find
04:41something yeah suds dripping down your chest yeah that's the most that's the worst part of it to me
04:45i try to keep my suds contained the toothpaste foam yeah like just dripping down your chest into
04:50the chest hair but wait there's more oh there's more good so so uh he says as i'm walking by
05:00this boy walks up to the toothbrush guy and says dad mom's wondering where you are you've been gone
05:07for an hour okay all right i noticed their campsite is right next to the bathrooms i'm a long time
05:14listener i am well aware of the say nothing help no one well kind of you almost got it but you have
05:21the right idea help no one trust no one right what we normally say but say nothing help no one
05:26that's fine as well uh he says we're still camping they're still here i'm tempted to snitch to his
05:34wife that he's trying to cruise in the campground it still is a bold uh should i drop the bomb or
05:42keep to myself thank you in advance now this guy's poor this poor guy's camping with his kids he's
05:47getting an hour away and he's trying to choke himself to death that's it i mean like it might
05:51just be i need some time i'll tell his wife what yeah but i mean it's not like you caught him
05:57blowing someone that's what i mean he's not it wasn't red-handed seductively brushing his teeth
06:01yes that's what you're gonna tell his wife yeah that's wild huh she's gonna think you're insane
06:05excuse me can i talk to you for a second and then she's like yeah that's how he brushes his teeth
06:09i just want to talk to you for a moment about your husband he's i busted him seductively brushing his
06:15teeth in the campground bathroom and i just i mean i hate to break it to you but i just wanted to let you
06:19know i think that's more strange than anything of the story that you'd want to tell us also just
06:25you you jumping to that conclusion makes it seem a little maybe yeah and then she's gonna tell your
06:31wife yeah exactly it's a wild thing to be like brushing your teeth and be like go back and be like
06:38so while i was brushing my teeth somebody went and told my wife i was soliciting gay sex
06:42yeah i don't know oh my god i'd hate that the guy was probably just a weirdo that brushes his
06:48teeth weird the guy's like look at this guy really thirsting for wieners i mean thirsting
06:54for wieners that's his problem he listens to us you're hungry for dawn aren't you you sicko
06:59excuse me ma'am your husband's in the bathroom filleting a toothbrush right now and i'm pretty
07:06sure he's cruising for gay sex in there you're gonna want to get your marriage in order yeah
07:11i hate to break it to you
07:13shoot at that conversation please have it and tape it so we can hear it and she knows exactly
07:21how he brushes his teeth i mean she's probably been stared at oh this one
07:25no no i've seen it a hundred times there was plaque on the back of his tongue and ever since
07:31then he's just been porno style doing that not again yeah that's it
07:37what a crazy situation got that bad breath that comes right from your guts
07:45your husband's cruising for fellas in there
07:47you didn't see anything except him brush his teeth that's what i'm saying it's a bold it's
07:57a bold assumption also even if he was blowing someone you don't know these people you stay
08:03out of it right yes of course i think it's just a dude brushing his teeth and he's getting some
08:08extra time or something yeah and who cares whatever like if i walk if i walked into a campground
08:14bathroom and i heard like like i am not sticking around oh my god i'm not going in like i guess
08:22i'm gonna still uh finish up hey everybody hey boys what are you doing in here what's going on
08:30where's your wife i'm gonna tell her what you're doing you know i mean like i don't even the second
08:36the door cracks and i hear some kind of uh gag gag reflex uh it's like okay no no no it's just
08:44been the wrong time yeah gotta shower in the am i love that camping you're supposed to get away
08:49from people and this is what happens yeah like this doesn't sound relaxing to me no guy seductively
08:55brushing his teeth every day staring at me that is not a good relaxing time no come on just you got
09:04to stay out of it yeah you just you're never gonna say nothing help guy again like how long's the
09:08camping trip you're not it's almost over exactly one weekend i love the unnecessary waves that could
09:15cause for that other man's camping trip oh my god oh my god crazy he may not be initiating oral sex
09:21with another man he's possibly just be really scrubbing his tongue i mean or he could be cruising
09:27he could be but it's not your way it's not it's maybe they have an agreement do you guys let the
09:32foam do you guys let the foam dribble down and then you sort of like just rub it rub it right in
09:37yeah yeah me too i mean so we're all the same yeah we're all the same that's what i want oh my god
09:41i want him to get a some video of this oh this guy i don't want to see oh yeah imagine someone was
09:49recording you brush your teeth and then you're like hey what's going on and they're like well you're the
09:53one who's soliciting gay sex i know yeah no i'm not this is not well sort of but not a stranger's
10:02marriage is in trouble we must intervene i have never cared for something with less emotion than
10:11someone else's marriage oh no i just don't i just don't care what they do i don't care that is up to
10:18i just don't care not mine oh yeah no like i just always assume she knows right i always assume
10:25that she knows he gags in the bathroom on whatever he's ganging he's been in here for an hour until the
10:34kid came running so you cannot drop the bomb because you have no bomb there is no besides a man
10:39seductively brushing his teeth that i don't know what i mean if you saw him in a stall with someone
10:45even then that's his business that's not your business and that's for them to deal with so that
10:49guy runs back to his wife and he's like honey this is crazy some guy was staring at me in the
10:54bathroom she's like some guy just told me you were trying to blow dudes yeah yeah wild campground
11:01i love the long email that this guy wrote i just always am amazed yeah like he this guy is at a
11:06campground relaxing doesn't sound fun campground and he wrote this email about another man deep
11:12throating a toothbrush oh my god it is three paragraphs long yeah and a conclusion so none of
11:20your business mind your business you cannot tell another woman that her man was deep throating a
11:25toothbrush in the bathroom because that's all it was yeah yeah and that's he could just be a weird
11:30teeth brushing the show has got to you that's what i think has happened i mean brushing your teeth for
11:37an hour a little that's a lot yeah it's odd it's odd for sure but who knows what he's up to i just
11:42think there's anything's possible he could just be getting some free time you know keep to yourself
11:49man none of your business let those people do what they want to do it's on them
11:54you