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00:24.
00:34I see the comp plan's doing you good.
00:36Shut up.
00:38How's your back?
00:40I don't think it's badly broken.
00:42.
00:44.
00:46Could you help me out of this chair?
00:48.
00:50You only just got in it.
00:52I know that. I'm sitting on something.
00:54Sitting on what?
00:56Look, I don't want to play 20 questions. I want to get up.
00:58There's something sharp sticking in my...
01:00All right. All right.
01:02There we are.
01:04Oh, no.
01:06What?
01:07You've dented it.
01:09Dented my bum as well.
01:11I think it's all right, though. You okay?
01:14No, I'm bleeding to death and I've got tetanus.
01:17Think I can bend it out?
01:19What is it?
01:20Switch box.
01:21Well, what was it doing there?
01:23God, I think I've chipped a bone.
01:24Yeah, well, I must have put it there, I suppose. I'm sorry.
01:27It's all right.
01:28Oh, how's it going?
01:30All right, I think.
01:32What are you doing, exactly?
01:33You know what I'm doing.
01:35Well, I keep forgetting.
01:36One there, one there, and three spotlights.
01:39It seems a lot.
01:40Well, while I'm at it.
01:42Yes.
01:43Need to be able to see what you're doing in the kitchen.
01:45Yes, yes.
01:47Anyway, you do more of that sort of thing than I do.
01:49Yes.
01:50Hmm.
01:51I had hoped, you know, now that we've actually tied the knot, that you might take a bit more
01:54interest in cooking the odd meal.
01:56I mean, now you've cracked the breakfast recipes.
02:00What breakfast recipes?
02:02Putting the milk and sugar on the cornflakes.
02:05Boiling the kettle, buttering the toast.
02:08I was encouraged, you know.
02:09Onwards now.
02:10Fresh woods and pastures new.
02:12A little grated cheese with the baked beans.
02:15I do cook.
02:16Tomato in the spaghetti hoops.
02:19Cook what?
02:21I did supper the other night.
02:22When?
02:23That fish.
02:24What, when the bag burst?
02:28Yes.
02:29What do you want to go prodding it for?
02:30To see if it was ready.
02:32Anyway, I just don't know about cooking.
02:34Well, I don't know about electrics.
02:36Find out's the answer.
02:37Explore the wonderful world of books.
02:39Make a bit of an effort.
02:41Sometimes I wish you'd married Rodney.
02:43So do I.
02:44Well, just served you right.
02:45You don't know how lucky you are.
02:47What?
02:48What's Rodney got to do with all this?
02:50Eh?
02:51Where'd he suddenly come from?
02:53And what are you grouching about anyway?
02:55I'm the one that's supposed to get ratty.
02:57I've got pernicious arthritis in my back.
02:59I weigh 1600 weight.
03:01And I get heartburn all the time.
03:02I can do without you grousing away as well.
03:04You're not rewiring the kitchen.
03:06Oh, I am sorry.
03:08I realize I'm not pulling my weight.
03:10Just pass me the ladders and I'll nip up in the loft
03:12and do a few switch boxes.
03:13Don't have switch boxes in the loft.
03:14You have junction boxes.
03:16You all right?
03:17Yeah, I'm all right.
03:19Rodney wouldn't have put in lights.
03:20And he couldn't cook either.
03:21So you'd have starved to death.
03:23Useless little drip.
03:25Look.
03:26Four-eyed little butterfly catcher.
03:29First-class assistant scoutmaster material he was.
03:32Can't think what you saw in him.
03:34Rodney was a writer.
03:35Oh, I know he was.
03:36I read one of his things once.
03:37A psychological novel with all the penetrating insight of Enid Blyton.
03:42Well, all writers have to experiment until they find their genre.
03:46Rodney's genre was rubbish.
03:47That's what he was best at.
03:49The production of pure, unadulterated...
03:51Oh, shut up.
03:52Produced more of that than a bull with enteritis.
03:55I mean, you're a good writer.
03:58What did you think of his stuff?
04:00Well, he was young then.
04:01Infantile is the word.
04:03How on earth did you get off with him in the first place?
04:06In the canteen.
04:08He spilled osso buco all down my boiler suit.
04:11Well, now that sounds in character.
04:13Well, it was my fault.
04:15I was miles away ogling Greg Armstrong.
04:17Don't remember a Greg Armstrong?
04:18No, he wasn't your sort.
04:20He was athletic and good-looking.
04:23No, I mean, Rodney caught me off guard.
04:26He said, would I like to go with him on this Egyptology weekend?
04:29An Egyptology weekend?
04:31Yeah.
04:32This is Rodney's version of a rave up at the rainbow, is it?
04:36I guess so.
04:37While the rest of us make do with dinner and a show,
04:40Rodney's offering the whole of Egypt's ancient splendour.
04:42Yep.
04:43Yeah, well, with a line like that,
04:45I'm surprised he wasn't deafened by the sound of knickers hitting the floor.
04:50You are a sod.
04:51He's nowhere near as bad as you keep saying.
04:54Well, yes he is, but you shouldn't keep saying it.
04:56Oh, so buco.
04:58Yeah, you know, those big slices of bone with small bits of meat on.
05:01Swimming in general purpose red brick sauce?
05:03Yeah.
05:04Oh, I remember it well.
05:05Well, I reckon you're well shot of him.
05:07You haven't done so bad.
05:08Haven't I?
05:09There's worse people than me.
05:11D.D.R. Min?
05:12Ayatollah Homini?
05:14Mrs. H?
05:15What?
05:16At the door.
05:18At the door?
05:19Yes, you remember that big slab of wood that blocks up the hole at the front?
05:23Today?
05:26Shelley?
05:27I'll get it.
05:28I'll get it.
05:29You told me tomorrow.
05:31I told you today.
05:32Tomorrow, you said?
05:33I said today.
05:34Look, I can't stop to have a row now.
05:36Mrs. H is at the door, but we will have one.
05:38I told you today.
05:39A real goodie.
05:40Tempers lost, tears, you know, divorce fodder.
05:43I mean, look at this place.
05:45Will you answer the door?
05:46I'm going.
05:47All right, Mrs. H, I'm coming.
05:50Tomorrow, you said.
05:52Hello, Mrs. H, right on time.
05:53Come on in.
05:54Hello, how are you?
05:55Fine, fine.
05:56Fran's through there.
05:57Come and have a few last words with that.
05:59I was expecting you, so I thought I'd run up some lights for you.
06:02Only I got a bit behind.
06:03Oh, dear.
06:04Yeah.
06:05Fran said you were coming tomorrow, you see.
06:06Oh, I said today.
06:08Friday, you said.
06:09That's right.
06:10It is Friday.
06:11I know that.
06:12Of course it is.
06:13Mrs. H is coming on Friday, and here she is.
06:17All right, I'm very sorry.
06:19I apologise.
06:20That's all right.
06:21Oh!
06:22Well, what's going on in here, then?
06:23Shelley's putting some lights in.
06:25I didn't know you knew about that.
06:27He didn't.
06:28He explored the wonderful world of books.
06:31Sit down, Mrs. H.
06:32Don't feel you have to take sides right away.
06:34Sit and listen a bit before I decide.
06:36Friday?
06:37The guy's coming about the dry rot.
06:40Well, we've kept it for him.
06:43Oh, you've never got dry rot.
06:46Now, don't you start.
06:47Oh, well, that's serious, that is.
06:49We know it's serious, Mrs. H. We've been terrified by experts.
06:52It's only a little bit.
06:53That's not what Mr. Smiley said.
06:55What a man.
06:56Who's Mr. Smiley?
06:57Who's Mr. Smiley?
06:58He's the woodwork expert who came to look at it.
07:01Do it, Shelley.
07:02OK.
07:03Well, he's the best guy in the world to be called Smiley.
07:06He's got a face like a newly bankrupt undertaker.
07:09You know, the second you lay eyes on him, you want to sympathise with him about something.
07:13He's a wood expert and he moves like he's made of the stuff.
07:16A sort of manic, depressive Pinocchio.
07:18So he's at the door.
07:20I say cheerily, you understand.
07:22Good afternoon.
07:23I believe we have a touch of dry rot under the stairs.
07:25And I smiled a bit, you know, to show him I could take it.
07:28I had guts.
07:29Dry rot was nothing to me.
07:30If it was bad, I was one of those to be told.
07:33He opens the cupboard door.
07:36Looks in, freezes.
07:39A look of horror on his miserable face.
07:41Nothing happens.
07:43It's like Howard Carter looking in Tutankhamen's tomb for the first time,
07:47only to discover Moriarty's Nick DeLock.
07:50He's like this for so long, I'm getting worried.
07:53Then he says, very quietly, like looking at your house the day after it's been bombed.
07:57Oh, good blimey.
08:00So, I mean, I know what he's thinking.
08:03Obviously the street will have to go, but can London be safe?
08:06Definitely doubtful.
08:07I mean, Fran and I will have to be burned,
08:09and armies of men in asbestos suits with flamethrowers
08:12will spend a year or two round here on double time.
08:15But one day maybe the area could be recolonised by the Battlestar Galactica Brigade.
08:20Anyway, the shock of it's put him into a catatonic trance.
08:23I say, very quietly, bad, is it?
08:26Well, I mean, it's cancer of the house, dry rot.
08:28He starts sucking in his breath so hard he's getting wind erosion of the teeth.
08:32He's struck down by terminal head shaking,
08:34and I'm thinking I should be force-feeding him hot sweet tea for shock.
08:37Well, is he going to do it then?
08:39Course not.
08:40I wouldn't inflict it on anyone who was that upset by it.
08:42I showed him the door.
08:43I'm not too closely.
08:45I was afraid he might find woodworm in it and have a heart attack.
08:49Well, what is going to happen about it then?
08:51Mr Croft from Timber Tech's We Love Rotten Jobs is coming to look at it today.
08:56We've got a bed made up and a doctor standing by.
08:59Anyway, how are things with you, Mrs H?
09:02Well, we've got a bit of a problem at the house.
09:05Mrs Ratcliffe acting up?
09:06Oh, don't mention Mrs Ratcliffe.
09:08Still finding murderers everywhere, is she?
09:10Oh!
09:11So what's the problem?
09:13We've got Moroccans.
09:15Make it sound like mice, Mrs H.
09:17No, we let your room to a Moroccan.
09:20You said, yes.
09:21Well, he's only been there the one night and he has this girl to stay.
09:25Well, I mean, that's his business.
09:27But, last week I'm doing the stairs and there's two little kids playing on the landing.
09:32I asked them where their mummy was and a lady appears and says she's their gran.
09:36And they've all been there ever since.
09:39And then the other day, I met his brother on the stairs late at night.
09:43Well, I mean, now I've got so frightened I daren't go out in case I meet another one.
09:48Willy calls them the Multipline Moroccans.
09:51Every time you go out, you find some more.
09:54Anyway, we'll just have to wait and see how it turns out, I suppose.
09:58Here, what exactly are you doing here?
10:01Putting in lights, overhead and spotlights.
10:03Oh, yes.
10:05Yeah, look at all these colours.
10:07Common market improvement, that.
10:09What is?
10:10Well, look.
10:12Here's old flecks.
10:13Red, black and green.
10:15See, which is live, Mrs H?
10:17Well, red, of course.
10:18Why, of course?
10:19Well, red for danger, innit?
10:21It's obvious.
10:22So which is negative?
10:23Black.
10:24And the green one's earth.
10:25I always remember that.
10:26Of course, green things come out the earth.
10:29Well, now they've been improved.
10:32See, now brown's live and blue's negative.
10:35Why?
10:36Well, it's a common market improvement, innit?
10:38But that doesn't make any sense at all.
10:40That's what I said, it's a common market improvement.
10:43Well, why is this one green and yellow?
10:48Ah, to distinguish it from the plain green ones.
10:50But there aren't any plain green ones.
10:52I know, but these common market boys like to be on the safe side.
10:55Now, you're talking rubbish.
10:57I'm talking rubbish.
10:59What about the sand-headed Euro freak that dreamt this lunacy up?
11:02Brown for live.
11:03Or is it blue?
11:05No, brown for live.
11:06Brown for live.
11:07Brown for live.
11:08What's live?
11:09Brown.
11:10I should be asking you that again, no doubt.
11:12Well, you're getting on all right in your new house, are you?
11:15Oh, it's just great.
11:17Apart from the dry rot.
11:18And the plumbing.
11:19Yeah, and the plumbing.
11:20We do have a bit of a problem with the pipes.
11:22They hammer.
11:23Sometimes the water trickles and once it was brown for a bit.
11:26But apart from the plumbing and the dry rot, there's no problems at all.
11:29Apart from the roof.
11:31And the guttering.
11:33And the brickwork.
11:34And the drains.
11:35Exactly.
11:36I mean, the whole of the downstairs is absolutely perfect.
11:39You know, for a mushroom farmer.
11:41And the floorboards are lovely and soft.
11:43You know, spongy.
11:45No, it's all right, really.
11:46We've just got a lot of hard work to do.
11:48Oh.
11:49See, you've got those old panel doors like us.
11:52I've been on it, Willie, for years to put hardboard over them.
11:55We're going to have them stripped, Mrs H, eventually.
11:58What?
11:59Bare wood?
12:00See, we'd like to retain the original character of the house.
12:02It's late Victoria.
12:03We're trying to put in things that are in keeping with that.
12:06Oh, yes.
12:07Hmm.
12:08Well, it'll save you doing all this then, won't it?
12:11Eh?
12:12What?
12:13What?
12:14Well, you'll be having gaslight installed then, won't you?
12:18Oh, did he tell you about that man who phoned for you?
12:38What man?
12:39Oh, I've forgotten his name.
12:41What was his name?
12:42You knew him at university, and he's anxious to get in touch.
12:45Shelley?
12:46Oh, yeah.
12:47It was, er, Rodney.
12:48Yes, forgot to mention.
12:49Sorry.
12:50You little creep.
12:51Ah, you don't want to talk to Rodney?
12:53So that's where it all came from.
12:55What's wrong with Rodney?
12:57Well, number one, he used to be my boyfriend.
12:59And number two, he and Shelley had a rather big altercation once.
13:03What did he want?
13:04Nothing.
13:05He just moved to London, and he wanted to contact you.
13:08Oh, I didn't know he'd moved to London.
13:10So where shall we go then?
13:11Manchester?
13:12Carnarvon?
13:14Tristan da Kuna.
13:15I don't want to talk to him, actually.
13:17It'll be rather embarrassing.
13:18PHONE RINGS
13:19Ah.
13:20That'll be the guy from Timbertex.
13:27Mr Shelley?
13:28Yes?
13:29Mr Croft.
13:30Timbertex.
13:31Come in, Mr Croft.
13:32What seems to be the problem, then?
13:34Er, dry rot, I think.
13:36Nasty, that can be.
13:38So I gather.
13:39Where is it, then?
13:40Er, in this cupboard.
13:42See, with dry rot, it can go through anything.
13:44Uh-huh.
13:45Go through a wall, dry rot.
13:46Good Lord.
13:47I'm talking about a thick brick party wall.
13:49Straight through it can go.
13:50Sniffing out wood to breed off.
13:53What causes it, exactly?
13:55Dry rot.
13:56Damp.
13:58Why's it called dry rot, then?
14:01So you don't get it muddled up with wet rot.
14:03What causes wet rot?
14:05Dryness?
14:06No.
14:07Wet.
14:08That's why it's called wet rot.
14:09But it's nothing to dry rot, wet rot.
14:11Difference between an head cold and double pneumonia.
14:13Straight.
14:15My little house has double pneumonia.
14:16Certainly smells that way.
14:17In here, is it?
14:18Yeah.
14:24Oh, go blind.
14:27You can say that again.
14:29You have got fruiting bodies in there.
14:31What are they?
14:33Well, they're like mushrooms, see?
14:34And they put out spores and the spores put out mycelium.
14:37Like Fred's.
14:38Little Fred's looking for wood to breed off.
14:40That's what causes that cuboidal cracking.
14:43I've got cuboidal cracking as well as fruiting bodies.
14:46Afraid so.
14:47Yeah, well, I think you'd better come on through and have a cup of hot sweet tea.
14:50Oh, that's very kind, Tar.
14:52I won't say no.
14:53Yes.
14:54Could go and drop a Rosie Lee.
14:55Afternoon, ladies.
14:56Hello.
14:57Hello.
14:58This is Mr Croft, Mrs Hawkins and my wife Fran.
15:00Pleased to meet you.
15:01Got a spot above or under the stairs then?
15:03Bad, is it?
15:04Not good.
15:05We've got cuboidal cracking and fruiting bodies.
15:08What is dry rot exactly?
15:10Well, it's a kind of fungus and it puts out mycelium.
15:13Little threads that can go through anything.
15:15It's wonderful really when you think about it.
15:17Well, it's not wonderful because it can bring your house down.
15:20But from the fungus's point of view, it's a little miracle really.
15:25I mean, it's a living thing and it can put threads through a thick brick wall.
15:29I mean, it's nature triumphing over man, innit?
15:32This laudable ability you have to see the fungus's point of view
15:36doesn't discourage you from wiping it out at all.
15:38Oh, of course not.
15:39Oh, good.
15:40I was afraid you might be taking the British sense of fair play just a little too far.
15:43Yeah, I just realised what you was on about.
15:45I mean, why it's called dry rot when it's caused by damp.
15:48No, the reason it's called dry rot is because once it's started,
15:52it can spread to good dry timber with no bother.
15:55See, it's an infection.
15:57It's like your house has got a disease.
15:59Like it's got cancer.
16:00Well, yeah, you could say that.
16:09Oh, excuse me. Sit down a bit.
16:12Hello?
16:15Rodney!
16:17Well, well, we were just talking about you.
16:20How nice to hear from you. How are you?
16:22Started shaving yet?
16:24Yes, yes, you heard right.
16:27I was out of work for a time after uni.
16:30A lazy little what?
16:32Oh, you use bad language now.
16:34My word, we are coming along.
16:36So what line are you in now?
16:38Knitting walls, flower arranging?
16:40Yes, I do know the sort of writing you do, Rodney.
16:43As a matter of fact, we've got some under our stairs.
16:46Now, I dare say you'd like to talk to Fran.
16:48Yes, well, you can't.
16:49We're married now.
16:50I mean properly.
16:51Also, she's extremely pregnant, so you're a bit late.
16:54Don't give me that can't understand my attitude, bananas.
16:58Remember the last time we met?
17:00Yes?
17:01And can you remember what you called me?
17:03In front of all those people?
17:05And can you remember the destructive little tantrum you had?
17:08That Charlie Parker record was irreplaceable.
17:12And the record player was never the same, even when I did get all the earth out of it.
17:17What do you mean you didn't mean to damage it?
17:19You threw it out the window.
17:22It may just have been an old record player to you, Rodney, but I cherished it.
17:26Those dance sets were very good.
17:28My mother had to go on the streets for weeks to buy that.
17:34Rodney, I'd like to talk to you openly, honestly, freely.
17:37You know, a real man-to-burk chat.
17:42I mean, you are a very special person in my life.
17:45I hate you.
17:47I could never be this rude to anyone under any circumstances, but you are the shining exception.
17:51Remember the dance set, I say, and plunge in.
17:54Of course it isn't just that.
17:56You wreck my gramophone, you're after my wife and you wear Terralene trousers.
18:01What more do you want?
18:03Well, you used to.
18:04You used to have the shiniest bum in Christendom.
18:08Yes, well, well, why have you phoned him?
18:10Want to invite us all to a wine and cheese mummy unwrapping, do you?
18:15Oh, now you see, he's hung up.
18:16I can't understand why we were chatting away so happily.
18:19Well, you certainly told him.
18:23Shelley.
18:24Well, he got out my pipe.
18:26He was starting to have a go at me about being a layabout.
18:30Well?
18:31Him calling me useless.
18:32He was out for a bit, was you, Mr Shelley?
18:34He was out for four years.
18:36Get away.
18:37Nothing going in your line, was there?
18:39That was his line.
18:40Layabout.
18:42Here.
18:44Are you a social security scrounger?
18:46Oh, yes, I was in my way.
18:48Get away.
18:49I've always wanted to meet a real scrounger.
18:52Always reading about them, but never seem to actually meet one.
18:55Well, you've met one now.
18:56Well, well.
18:57And you was at university and all?
18:58Yeah.
18:59For five years.
19:00At the taxpayer's expense.
19:02Worth every penny, Mrs H.
19:03Not only did I get a degree, but I enjoyed myself there.
19:06Well, you must have worked there, then.
19:08Oh, yes, yes.
19:09I liked university.
19:10I'd have liked to have stayed there in a way.
19:12Very nearly did.
19:14Eh?
19:15When Fenterman asked me to stay on.
19:17When was this?
19:18Oh, yeah, yeah.
19:19I think you were still dusting off Egyptian sarcophagi with the Terralene Romeo.
19:24Well, this Fenterman one day summons me to lunch.
19:27He was a big noise in applied sciences.
19:29Dreadful lunch.
19:30A bottle with a label saying claret-type wine.
19:33A plate of beef-type meat.
19:34And a compost of unidentified vegetation.
19:37Now, Fenterman was gay.
19:39Okay, fair enough.
19:40But he was a screamer of the old school.
19:42You know, wet flannel wrists, quarter-pound gold ring on his pinky,
19:45in a voice like Katherine Hepburn.
19:47He used to walk around trying to let as little of his suit touch his body as possible.
19:52In short, the kind of gay that gives homosexuals a bad name.
19:56A pansy-like?
19:57Quite.
19:58Oh, yeah.
19:59So, halfway through lunch, he finds himself in a drunk-type mind,
20:03and I am aware of tactile intrusions.
20:05Eh?
20:06Touching him up.
20:07Oh!
20:08You're blind!
20:10Well, we must see it from his point of view as well.
20:13Oh, yeah.
20:14Course.
20:15Right.
20:16Anyway, I'm happy to say it was all a bit perfunctory.
20:18Not really trying, like.
20:19That's right.
20:20Yeah?
20:21Anyway, he suddenly fixed me a steely look over his gold-type rims and says,
20:25Have you ever considered becoming one of us?
20:31It was a long, panicky moment before I realised he was suggesting I become a lecturer.
20:40Unless, of course, he was asking me to spy for the Russians.
20:43Blindly.
20:44Well, for God's sake, why didn't you do lecturing then?
20:47It was tempting.
20:48I considered it right enough.
20:50But the thought of spending the rest of my life dressed in soggy tweeds
20:53doing a bad Magnus Pike impersonation.
20:56It depressed me even more than the thought of working for a living.
20:59So, I opted for the warm embrace of the labour exchange.
21:02You're a dab hand with the old words, Governor, no mistake.
21:05Well, best have a gander at the rot, then.
21:07Thanks for the tea.
21:08You're welcome.
21:09Doing a bit of worrying, then?
21:10Trying to.
21:11Yeah, I enjoy that game.
21:12Um, you know about worrying, then?
21:14Well, a bit, yeah.
21:15Uh, see, what I can't work out is, I want to light there and there, that one on a two-way switch, and three spotlights, but that cupboard's in the way of the cable.
21:24Oh, yeah.
21:25Well, you need a spur, then.
21:26Ah.
21:27Hang on.
21:28Here's your best way.
21:33Uh-huh.
21:34Transfer from existing rows to junction box.
21:36Go from junction box to new rows, and from new rows to second rows.
21:39Go from second rows to another junction box.
21:41Best to be on the safe side.
21:43Go from second junction box to first spotlight, and also the second spotlight.
21:47Go from second spotlight on a spur to the third spotlight.
21:49Pop in your switch circuits on existing and new rows.
21:52Put in your second switch in the two-way.
21:54Run your four-core five mil to existing switch on that circuit, and bingo.
21:58Let there be light.
22:01Well, I think that's your simplest way.
22:05Yeah, well, thanks very much.
22:07That's, um, that's made it, um, that's made it.
22:10Um, this is a rose.
22:13What they call a rose, yeah.
22:15Yeah.
22:16Of course, you can use roses now, the junction boxes, of course.
22:18And tap your lamp holder, flex straight out, like.
22:20In the old days, you had a junction box in the loft, you ran to the rows to pick up the flex light.
22:24Yeah, but now the rows and the junction box are combined.
22:27Of course.
22:28Of course, you can't use the rows as a junction box.
22:31No.
22:32No.
22:33If you need a junction box, you put one in the loft and run from there.
22:36Like in the old days.
22:37Exactly.
22:38It's a great improvement.
22:39Oh, yes.
22:40Right.
22:41Let's have a gander at the rot, then.
22:43Excuse us, ladies.
22:44But, of course.
22:45That damn set you had, was it black and cream with legs and sort of scalloped knobs?
22:52The very one.
22:53Yeah, they were good, then.
22:54They weren't all that expensive, though, were they?
22:56I don't think so, no.
22:57Why?
22:58Well, I mean, I just wondered.
23:00I don't know how much your mother charged when she was on the game, but, well, weeks.
23:07Hey, do you think a family of Moroccans might be interested in living in here?
23:11Eh?
23:12Nothing.
23:13Only Mrs. H is trying to find accommodation for some.
23:16Now, are you sure you can stand a shock of looking at this rot?
23:19No, it's not all that bad, actually.
23:20Actually, it's not all that bad at all.
23:22But we always prepare for the worst.
23:24Yeah, so I gather.
23:25Why?
23:26Somebody else tendered for it, then?
23:27Well, I shan't be asking them to do it.
23:29Oh.
23:30Who was it, then, if you don't mind me asking?
23:32Bowley's.
23:33Oh.
23:34Hang on.
23:35Did a bloke with a serious face and a stiffish wart come and look at it?
23:38A Mr, erm...
23:39Smiley.
23:40Smiley.
23:41That's him.
23:42That's the one.
23:43Oh, well, I know why he won't be doing it, then.
23:45Why?
23:46He wears Terralene trousers.
23:48I just won't play around.
23:49Are you kidding?