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Hoshyarian | Haroon Rafiq | Comedy Show | 29th September 2023
Transcript
00:00 "Wisdom, wisdom."
00:02 Greetings, viewers. I am Haroon Rafiq and you are watching 'Hoshiyariyan'.
00:05 Friends, if you tell a cricketer
00:09 that you play cricket for eight hours a day,
00:12 he won't be surprised.
00:13 He won't stop you, stop you or even criticize you.
00:15 If you tell a singer
00:17 that you are practicing singing for eight hours a day,
00:21 he won't be surprised, he won't stop you or object.
00:25 Similarly, there are many people in different professions.
00:29 If you tell them the same thing, they won't be surprised.
00:32 Remember, the person you are telling your dream to,
00:35 if he stops you,
00:37 refuses you,
00:38 criticizes you
00:40 and you are working hard for it,
00:42 then know that he is not in his field.
00:45 He has never seen that dream.
00:48 He has never gone that path.
00:50 You are asking him for a way
00:52 that he has never gone.
00:54 So, share your dreams with those people
00:57 who have seen that dream.
00:59 Whenever you need advice, take it from people
01:01 who are related to that field.
01:03 Let's start today's show with this message.
01:07 Before we start today's show,
01:08 I want to tell you that Mr. Agha Majid
01:11 wants to make a film.
01:13 He spoke to me about it.
01:15 He wants to take local talent from here
01:18 and not take expensive actors
01:20 and make a good film.
01:22 I advised him to audition first.
01:25 So, he wants to audition in our show today.
01:29 He will introduce us to his producer.
01:31 Let's talk to Mr. Agha Majid.
01:32 Hello, Mr. Agha. - Hello, Mr. Jrabi.
01:35 Are you ready? - Yes, play the song.
01:38 Thank you for respecting us.
01:41 You wanted to take cheap actors and make a film.
01:43 Mr. Agha, I want to audition too.
01:46 No, I want young girls.
01:48 Mr. Agha, a director has to keep an eye on everything.
01:54 Yes. - I will advise you
01:56 to buy a strong stool for yourself.
01:59 You will be able to keep an eye on everything.
02:01 Hold on. Let me brush my teeth first.
02:03 Okay. - You gave me this advice.
02:04 Let me listen to it.
02:05 What film are you making?
02:08 Oh, my! I am making a Punjabi film.
02:10 Who inspired you?
02:11 Have you seen Khannaik?
02:13 Oh, wow!
02:15 You told me that you have taken money.
02:18 Who is investing money in the film?
02:19 When did I ask you for money?
02:21 You told me to give you some money.
02:23 You can come as a producer.
02:25 Don't worry. I don't want to talk about money.
02:27 You can work here and make us work.
02:31 Someone must be investing money.
02:37 Where did you get the money from?
02:38 Tell me who is the producer.
02:39 He is from the village. - Okay.
02:40 He says that the story is his and the songs are his.
02:43 Mr. Agha, I hope that you make a good film.
02:46 I will make a great film.
02:47 Talent is not hidden.
02:50 Really? - If this is Khannaik's story
02:53 then there won't be any copyright issues.
02:55 He is inspired by him.
02:56 I don't have any copyright issues with him.
02:58 I don't want to get involved in any serious issues.
03:01 Sir, the producer is coming.
03:04 I told you about Azeem Vicky.
03:06 Yes. - He is assisting me.
03:08 He is a sensible man.
03:10 Azeem Vicky is a serious and a dignified man.
03:15 Come, sir. Come.
03:16 Yes. - Oh, my!
03:19 What an insolent man!
03:21 Do you know who he is?
03:23 He is Mr. Azeem Vicky.
03:24 Sir, I don't want to go ahead.
03:25 I don't want to talk behind anyone's back.
03:27 Is this oil on your nose since childhood?
03:30 No, I got it removed.
03:32 People like you don't let a fly sit on your nose.
03:36 No, the fly has kept its mouth open.
03:38 Among our talent
03:41 who all do you want to invite for the audition?
03:43 I will call them.
03:44 Yes. I will show you. - Yes.
03:47 You select the boy.
03:49 Whom should I send? - Abid Charlie.
03:51 Should I call Abid Charlie? - Yes.
03:53 Call Abid Charlie. Come to the set.
03:55 He will do.
03:57 Sir, the boy is handsome. - Yes.
04:00 Okay. - Do you think he is a hero?
04:02 Okay.
04:04 Greetings, sir.
04:05 Greetings.
04:06 The girl.. - Yes.
04:08 The girl has said her dialogue.
04:10 You call the girl.
04:12 Call the girl.
04:13 Listen to me.
04:14 I don't know if I need to.
04:16 You are counting your talent.
04:18 Greetings, sir. - Greetings.
04:23 Heroine.
04:24 Greetings.
04:25 Greetings.
04:26 Malaika, your dialogue is..
04:29 Yes. - You can be a hero.
04:31 I will help you.
04:33 Give him a get up for a hero.
04:35 Yes, sir. - Shahdev, give him a get up for a hero.
04:39 Call Charlie. Hurry up.
04:41 And in a hero film like Madhuri has done..
04:44 Okay. - That is your role.
04:46 "You are not a hero, you are a hero."
04:50 What? - You.
04:51 Not you, Abid.
04:53 I am saying.. - Mr. Yadav, let me say something.
04:55 Yes. - The hero ran away from the jail yesterday.
04:57 Yes. - I think he ran away from the function.
04:59 No, Mr. Vicky. Please.
05:03 No, Vicky. Let me do my work. - Sorry, sir.
05:05 A human can become an animal.
05:07 But have you ever seen an animal become a human?
05:10 Oh, no.
05:11 This is your dialogue. - Okay.
05:12 Ready, light, start sound, action.
05:16 If you can be a hero, can I help you?
05:20 If..
05:21 Malaika, it is not if. - Sorry.
05:25 You are saying, you can be a hero.
05:28 Did you see how he took the role of a bad anchor?
05:31 Malaika, with a little emotion.
05:34 You can be a hero.
05:36 If you say, I can help you.
05:38 Here.
05:40 A human can become an animal. - Yes.
05:42 But have you ever seen an animal..
05:44 Say the dialogue correctly.
05:46 A human can become an animal.
05:48 But have you ever seen an animal become a human?
05:50 The path to reformation..
05:51 I.. The dialogue is getting out of my head.
05:55 Your dialogue is getting out of your head.
05:58 I have been watching you for three days.
06:00 Start sound, action.
06:04 You can be a hero.
06:06 If you say, I can help you.
06:08 A human can become an animal.
06:12 But have you ever seen an animal become a human?
06:16 I have left the path to reformation far behind.
06:19 I don't want to dub this film.
06:23 There is no path to reformation.
06:28 I am trying to make it sound good.
06:29 You are trying to make it sound good.
06:30 You are trying to make it sound good.
06:32 You are trying to make it sound good.
06:33 Sir, I said it in a way that my voice sounds like a woman.
06:37 If your voice sounds like a woman..
06:40 ..then what will you do with your face on the screen?
06:42 You will have a face.
06:45 You will look like this.
06:47 This is what happens when there is a theatre here.
06:51 I will take you to Amanat.
06:53 Let's take Amanat for an audition.
06:54 Amanat, come here.
06:57 I will give you a good interview.
06:58 A good interview.
07:00 Come. - Amanat, come here.
07:02 Greetings, sir. - Greetings.
07:05 I don't want to humiliate you.
07:07 Your dialogue is that a human can become an animal.
07:10 Have you ever seen an animal become a human?
07:12 I have left the path to reformation far behind.
07:15 Wow! - Isn't this what you wanted to say?
07:17 What? - Isn't this what you wanted to say?
07:18 I gave you the film. You can say whatever you want.
07:20 Amanat, don't do comedy. Do acting.
07:25 This is an audition. - Come on.
07:27 Come on. - Hurry up.
07:29 Sir. - Yes. - Ashkan.
07:31 You can become a hero.
07:36 If you say, I can help you.
07:39 Have you ever seen a human become an animal?
07:43 Amanat, this is not the dialogue.
07:45 You are saying that have you ever seen a human become an animal?
07:48 If he says yes..
07:50 Sir, have you ever seen a human.. - No.
07:54 It is written that a human can become an animal.
07:58 Have you ever seen an animal become an animal?
08:00 Yes. - Okay.
08:00 I have left the path to reformation far behind.
08:04 Not so far behind. - Yes.
08:06 That you find me a fool.
08:08 And it wasn't a simple Shahrukh Khan film.
08:10 Have you ever seen an animal become a human?
08:14 What is this? - All of them..
08:15 The whole team was a joke.
08:17 You are right. All the serious people went to the other side.
08:20 I am scared. - Why?
08:22 He took out a pistol.
08:24 No. - And he has kept it inside.
08:26 Give me the pistol.
08:27 What nonsense is this?
08:28 Wait.
08:30 Have you seen his work?
08:32 Ready, light, sound, action.
08:34 You can become a hero.
08:38 If you say, I can help you.
08:41 A human can become an animal.
08:43 But have you ever seen an animal become a human?
08:46 I have left the path to reformation far behind.
08:48 Not so far behind.
08:50 That you find me a fool.
08:52 He is right.
08:54 You can reformation far behind.
08:54 Because you don't reform.
08:56 One more chance. - Come on.
08:59 Very good.
09:00 Ready, light, sound, action.
09:02 You can become a hero.
09:06 If you say, I can help you.
09:09 I have seen a human become an animal.
09:11 What is this?
09:14 It seems that a jay has come in front of you.
09:16 And have you ever..
09:21 Amanat.
09:23 ..taken out your brother's cigarette?
09:25 Amanat. - I think he should play the role of Madhuri.
09:28 Amanat.
09:30 I am getting disturbed because of Vicky.
09:31 He is a hero.
09:32 Mr. Agha, 10 chances.
09:33 He is a hero.
09:34 What are you saying? - You are the best.
09:36 Sir is saying 10 chances.
09:37 10 chances. - 10 chances.
09:39 Sit there. - Sit there.
09:40 Call Gokhale.
09:42 Come Gokhale.
09:43 He will do this.
09:46 He won't be disturbed because he doesn't have hair.
09:48 He doesn't have his own hair.
09:50 There is no heroine in this scene.
09:53 Who is there in this scene?
09:55 There is a policeman.
09:56 So make Azeem the policeman.
09:58 Azeem, you are the policeman.
09:59 I will come. - I will sit on the side.
10:00 Lie down. - I will come tomorrow.
10:02 I will come to you in the scene.
10:04 How is it? - Very good.
10:05 It seems that this is a new scene.
10:07 It is looking good.
10:09 Inspector and Ballu's dialogue.
10:11 It is fine.
10:12 Get up and drink milk. - Yes.
10:14 A glass of milk and bread in the tray.
10:17 It is a duty.
10:19 But reality is different.
10:21 Yes. I am hungry.
10:23 Gokhale, there is a feel in this.
10:26 He is giving you milk and bread. - Yes.
10:29 And you are saying, sir, sometimes this and sometimes that.
10:33 With style.
10:35 Inspector, come here.
10:38 Inspector, come here.
10:40 Come, brother.
10:40 Who is Jackie Shroff?
10:42 Are you lying down, Gokhale?
10:44 Okay.
10:46 Very good.
10:46 Can you make him lie down or do you want him to lie down?
10:49 If he lies down, he will wake him up.
10:51 You are sleeping.
10:52 The inspector said, come on.
10:54 Get up and drink milk.
10:56 I don't want to take a bath.
10:58 When you want to drink milk, you will know.
11:01 Now you have to say, sir, you are feeding the snake milk.
11:06 He is lying down.
11:07 Cut it.
11:08 Light, start, sound, action.
11:11 I think he slept.
11:13 Do it again. Lie down.
11:16 Don't say action. - Action.
11:18 Hey, get up.
11:21 Drink milk.
11:22 Sir, you are feeding the snake milk.
11:26 He is lying down.
11:28 Gokhale, he is not lying down.
11:32 I mean, the next sentence is..
11:35 ..that he is lying down in this scene.
11:37 Now I will tell you the entire sentence. - Yes.
11:41 Sir, you are feeding the snake milk.
11:44 Don't say, he is lying down.
11:47 Okay. - Lie down.
11:48 Okay. - Cut it.
11:49 Action. - I know.
11:51 Hey, get up.
11:55 Drink milk.
11:56 Sir, you are feeding the snake milk.
12:01 Don't say, he is lying down.
12:04 Gokhale, please.
12:11 Just say..
12:12 You have to say that man..
12:14 He is a strange man.
12:15 Okay, you say.
12:17 Okay, you say.
12:19 Please.
12:19 Mr. Agha, it was your mistake.
12:21 Why did you give him the script?
12:22 Do you have a script? - Yes.
12:24 Do one thing.
12:26 The film is on production.
12:27 You make copies of it and send it to the helicopter.
12:31 So that it reaches home before it is made.
12:33 He is not smart.
12:36 Make another scene.
12:37 Which one? - In which there is a heroine.
12:39 In that there is only Hirwan.
12:40 Hirwan.
12:41 We are Punjabi ladies.
12:43 You are calling us. - Sorry.
12:44 Okay. - Cut it.
12:46 Ready, lights, start sound.
12:47 Action.
12:48 I am fed up of your auditions.
12:51 My story.
12:53 I will tell you what to do.
12:54 Hey, write it with me.
12:56 It has just come.
12:58 Write it.
12:59 It has just come.
13:00 It has just come.
13:01 It is night time.
13:04 No, it is 6.30.
13:05 He is telling a story.
13:08 It is night time.
13:09 Okay, we will start.
13:10 The door of the mansion is open.
13:12 Okay, the door is open.
13:17 The birds are flying inside.
13:19 This is good.
13:22 I like this.
13:23 But the sound effect can be better.
13:26 How?
13:27 Kud kud kud kud.
13:28 You have your own birds and we don't.
13:31 What was that?
13:32 Which birds were there?
13:34 There are different birds.
13:36 You go and get the horse.
13:38 The birds have come out.
13:39 There are sounds coming from the background.
13:41 What sound?
13:42 There is a sound.
13:43 Okay, this is your dialogue.
13:47 I will just come and tell you.
13:48 How far is the sound coming from?
13:50 Two kilometers.
13:51 There is a farmer behind us.
13:56 The camera is rolling.
13:57 Give it to me.
13:58 The scene is happening.
14:02 The sound is coming from here.
14:04 Yes.
14:05 A man is sleeping on a bed.
14:06 He is covered in a sheet.
14:07 I don't know who he is.
14:08 Suddenly he took the stick and the sound came from the bed.
14:10 Kud kud kud kud.
14:12 What is this sound?
14:14 He is stuck in a hen's nest.
14:16 Why is he stuck?
14:20 The bed is made of wood.
14:21 Yes.
14:22 The sound comes from the stick.
14:23 Okay, that sound.
14:24 That sound.
14:24 That sound. I understood.
14:25 He is covered in a sheet.
14:27 Oh my God.
14:28 It's a great film.
14:30 There is no man under him.
14:31 Oh.
14:33 Oh.
14:34 Oh.
14:35 Wow.
14:37 Wow.
14:38 You are not investing money in the actors yet.
14:40 Wow.
14:41 There is a sound coming from the back.
14:44 What?
14:44 Who is it?
14:45 Yes.
14:46 He is wearing a red tan.
14:48 He is wearing a red tan.
14:49 He is coming out.
14:50 Yes.
14:51 There is a sound coming from his eyes.
14:53 Thak.
14:54 Yes.
14:55 Thak.
14:56 Wow.
14:57 Thak.
14:57 Yes.
14:58 He needs a red tan frame.
15:00 Yes.
15:01 There is no man behind him.
15:02 Oh.
15:03 Wow.
15:04 Wow.
15:05 The film ends with props.
15:07 He is covered in a stain.
15:09 Okay.
15:10 Okay.
15:10 He is covered in a red tan.
15:12 Oh.
15:13 Oh.
15:13 I am telling you.
15:15 The man is not coughing.
15:17 He is eating things.
15:19 Anoop, I think he is doing 'Hawli Hawli'
15:22 and 'Haveli Haveli'.
15:25 Let's move on.
15:25 There is a drum in the mansion.
15:28 The drum is the drum.
15:34 What are you playing?
15:35 The drum has entered.
15:36 You are here.
15:37 There is no one in front.
15:39 Mr. Agha.
15:40 Put my glasses in the film.
15:44 I will leave.
15:45 There are glasses and no one is behind.
15:52 Mr. Constructor.
15:54 Yes.
15:55 Let them go.
15:57 You are eating things.
16:00 There is no one behind you.
16:02 Let's move on.
16:02 He is standing with his legs spread.
16:04 The thing that makes noise
16:06 moves this way.
16:07 When he stands with his legs spread.
16:10 Yes.
16:10 He is breathing air.
16:12 He is breathing air.
16:13 Air.
16:15 What kind of air is this?
16:17 I don't know if the film will be made or not.
16:18 You are playing music with the music.
16:20 A piece of newspaper with dry leaves.
16:24 Dry leaves.
16:26 I think he is doing a poem.
16:27 Okay.
16:28 A piece of newspaper is in front of the camera.
16:31 Yes.
16:32 There is no news on the newspaper.
16:35 Oh, God!
16:37 The camera shows that the press has flown away.
16:42 The film is in the cinema.
16:45 There is no one in the hall.
16:47 Everyone saw the roof.
16:53 A man flew away.
16:56 He saw the roof and there is no one in the hall.
16:59 He came down and that's the end.
17:02 Ladies and gentlemen, we have a small break.
17:08 We will meet after the break.
17:10 How much is the committee?
17:12 Tell us.
17:13 The committee is worth 5 lakhs.
17:15 Oh!
17:17 Lala, how much money do you have?
17:18 What?
17:19 This much.
17:19 I have 12 lakhs in total.
17:22 (Laughs)
17:25 (Music)
17:28 Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen.
17:30 We have a fake Amil with us.
17:33 What?
17:33 We have a disciple with us.
17:34 Let's talk to him.
17:36 Why have you come?
17:36 Sir, you know why you call him fake.
17:39 (Laughs)
17:40 I am a fake, son.
17:42 I am not fake.
17:42 (Laughs)
17:43 Sir, your disciple has made a fake face.
17:45 Oh, my cheek.
17:47 Yes.
17:48 I am a disciple.
17:50 Okay, you are a disciple.
17:51 I am a disciple.
17:53 I am a disciple.
17:54 He is a sage.
17:55 He is a sage.
17:56 You are a disciple.
17:57 Oh, my cheek.
17:58 I am a disciple.
17:59 Wait a minute, sir.
18:00 He is a sage and I am a disciple.
18:01 (Laughs)
18:02 I understood the problem.
18:04 He is a fake and he is a disciple.
18:05 (Laughs)
18:07 Okay.
18:07 It's okay, son.
18:08 Even if he is a fake, let me talk to him.
18:12 What happened?
18:13 Hurry up.
18:14 Tell me what happened.
18:15 Tell me what the problem is.
18:16 Listen, sir.
18:17 Yes.
18:18 He came to me as my disciple.
18:19 Okay.
18:20 He said that he doesn't believe in my love.
18:21 Okay.
18:21 He said that he is a disciple and I am a disciple.
18:24 Okay.
18:25 He came to me and said that he is a disciple.
18:26 Yes.
18:27 I said, yes.
18:28 He said, it's okay.
18:29 Yes.
18:29 I did a lot of rituals to convince him.
18:31 Okay, you did it and he believed it.
18:33 Yes, he believed it.
18:34 He did a lot of rituals.
18:35 He stayed at his house and convinced him.
18:37 (Laughs)
18:38 So, this is also a ritual.
18:39 It's a ritual.
18:40 It's a ritual.
18:40 His father and brother-in-law are after me.
18:42 Okay, what did you do?
18:44 I used to convince people for myself.
18:45 (Laughs)
18:47 Okay, such people give their aunt a dowry and get her divorced.
18:51 Now, it's mother's wedding.
18:52 She is the daughter.
18:53 (Laughs)
18:54 (Applause)
18:56 You tried to convince him.
18:58 You did this ritual.
18:58 I did a lot of rituals.
19:00 Okay.
19:00 I went to his house.
19:01 Okay.
19:02 I met his father.
19:03 Okay.
19:03 I said that he is a boy and he earns money.
19:05 Okay.
19:05 He is good at his job.
19:06 Okay.
19:07 He has a family.
19:08 Okay.
19:08 He has a family.
19:09 He didn't say that why don't you give him dowry?
19:11 Yes, he did.
19:12 (Laughs)
19:14 I called his father.
19:16 I said that he is good at his job.
19:17 (Laughs)
19:18 Okay, what happened then?
19:20 He agreed.
19:20 Then?
19:21 Then his daughter came.
19:22 He didn't agree?
19:22 He didn't agree.
19:23 Then what did you do?
19:24 I did a ritual.
19:25 What did you do?
19:26 I went to all the coaches in his area.
19:29 Okay.
19:29 I had a few of them.
19:30 Okay.
19:31 I went to all the boys and went to their house.
19:33 Then?
19:34 I went to all the coaches.
19:35 Okay.
19:35 Suddenly, I saw them.
19:37 They agreed.
19:37 (Laughs)
19:39 Tell me something.
19:41 You did a ritual.
19:42 You got married.
19:43 What marriage?
19:44 What is the problem?
19:46 The problem is that father demands money.
19:48 Yes.
19:48 Then give him money.
19:49 Money?
19:50 I have money.
19:51 Are you dishonest?
19:52 No, no.
19:53 God forbid.
19:53 He is the face of dishonest.
19:56 (Laughs)
19:57 Tell your mother that a honest man has a face.
20:00 (Laughs)
20:02 Sir, he is a fake lover.
20:03 She can get so high on a joke.
20:05 (Laughs)
20:06 Okay, tell me something.
20:07 Brother, you are a good friend to me.
20:09 You are agreeing that you have to give him money.
20:10 I will give him money.
20:11 Then give him money.
20:12 Where will I give him money?
20:14 He agreed to marry you.
20:16 Yes, the girl agreed.
20:17 All four committees agreed.
20:18 So, give him money for the one that is going to be removed.
20:20 It is going to be removed.
20:21 Oh, okay.
20:22 It is going to be removed.
20:23 He agreed to marry you.
20:24 Okay.
20:25 He is going to get married.
20:27 (Laughs)
20:28 You give him.
20:29 Put a new committee.
20:30 Brother, it is not done.
20:31 The second committee has been removed.
20:33 Then give him money again.
20:34 No, he is already married.
20:36 Where is he?
20:36 God has given him a marriage.
20:38 Okay, God bless.
20:40 The second committee was removed after nine months.
20:43 After a year.
20:44 All four committees were removed.
20:45 Yes.
20:46 It is a good thing.
20:47 Don't give me a headache.
20:49 Just tell me why you are so shameless.
20:52 Actually, I have to work in a television show.
20:56 Okay.
20:56 I have seen all the women there.
20:59 Okay, okay.
21:01 (Laughs)
21:02 Yes, I have seen a lot of women.
21:05 (Laughs)
21:06 I used to tell you that Mr. Agha will insult us.
21:09 (Laughs)
21:12 Okay, give me the third committee.
21:14 You are the third committee.
21:16 What?
21:17 You are sick and unemployed.
21:19 Oh.
21:20 You can't even move.
21:22 Oh.
21:22 You are taking money from me.
21:25 You must be asking for treatment.
21:26 No, no.
21:27 What treatment?
21:28 Yes.
21:28 God bless you.
21:29 (Laughs)
21:31 Should I tell you?
21:32 Yes, yes.
21:33 Yes.
21:33 The third committee has been removed.
21:35 Yes.
21:36 How many children do you have?
21:38 I had two children.
21:39 Okay.
21:40 Two.
21:41 You have two committees now.
21:42 I have been saying for three years.
21:43 Two committees have been removed.
21:44 Okay.
21:45 I have to ask for one more committee.
21:46 The fourth committee is left.
21:48 Yes, yes.
21:49 Give me that.
21:49 Yes.
21:50 The fourth committee is still standing.
21:52 Who?
21:52 Who is asking?
21:53 My father, who raised me.
21:56 Yes, yes.
21:56 Okay.
21:57 God is going to show happiness there too.
21:59 No, no, no.
22:00 Yes.
22:01 Then?
22:03 (Laughs)
22:06 Everyone is going to be happy.
22:08 Yes.
22:08 And I don't know if they will be happy there.
22:10 As much as they had a mutual accident.
22:12 (Laughs)
22:13 No, but if you can get them married by doing good deeds
22:17 then you can also get them married by doing good deeds.
22:19 I did good deeds.
22:20 Okay.
22:20 And then Mir did good deeds.
22:22 (Laughs)
22:23 No, no.
22:24 Love is not allowed.
22:25 Okay.
22:26 Lala, God is so kind to you
22:28 that you have a family's busy schedule too.
22:30 (Laughs)
22:31 How many committees are there?
22:33 First tell me this.
22:34 Tell me.
22:34 There is a committee of five lakhs.
22:36 Oh.
22:38 Lala, the money is being distributed in four ways.
22:39 Which way?
22:40 This way.
22:40 This way, I think there are 1200 committees in total.
22:43 (Laughs)
22:47 Lala, four committees are not enough.
22:49 You fool.
22:50 Now, you are going to get your hands dirty.
22:52 (Laughs)
22:53 I have a family of 1200 people.
22:54 I have a family of 100 people.
22:55 I have children too.
22:56 (Laughs)
22:57 You are not even alive.
22:58 How are you putting these committees?
23:00 Yes.
23:00 Who is Kamal?
23:01 You.
23:02 I have a good job.
23:03 What do you do?
23:04 I am a singer.
23:07 I have my own band.
23:08 Yes.
23:09 Wow.
23:09 I sing in the evenings.
23:10 Oh.
23:11 Yes.
23:12 You sing in the evenings.
23:13 Yes.
23:14 I sing in the evenings.
23:15 What?
23:16 (Laughs)
23:17 Singing is a very energetic job.
23:20 And you have a child every year.
23:21 (Laughs)
23:23 You know what?
23:24 Yes.
23:24 I have a small job with my husband.
23:26 If I get a job in singing and playing drums
23:28 then I will play drums like a mad man.
23:31 (Laughs)
23:33 You don't get a ticket to Dubai every time.
23:35 (Laughs)
23:38 You will get a ticket for a lakh.
23:39 What do you say?
23:40 Yes.
23:41 (Laughs)
23:43 If you give your next child a four year waqf
23:46 then you can return the money.
23:48 It is 5 lakhs.
23:49 This is God's work.
23:51 Yes.
23:51 Yes.
23:52 The ones who will come to this world.
23:54 Yes.
23:54 They will come.
23:55 Many of your brothers will come to this world.
23:58 (Laughs)
24:00 Look at this.
24:00 The entire family is working so hard to make me a father.
24:04 (Laughs)
24:08 Father.
24:08 What is it, father?
24:09 The grave of dishonesty is full of money.
24:11 (Laughs)
24:12 I am not saying dishonesty.
24:13 Give me your hand.
24:15 How will your hand be straight?
24:17 Give it to me.
24:18 No, look at me.
24:19 Your next daughter is coming.
24:20 Yes.
24:21 Give it to me.
24:22 Give me your next daughter.
24:23 Give it to me.
24:23 Where will I give it?
24:25 Why?
24:26 I have a small child.
24:27 Give it to me.
24:27 Yes.
24:28 God bless you.
24:30 (Laughs)
24:31 Father, don't you dare do anything
24:34 to a family that is so noble.
24:36 (Laughs)
24:37 I am sorry.
24:39 (Laughs)
24:41 If he sings a good Sarai song for us,
24:43 I will give him Rs. 1200.
24:45 Cut the Rs. 1200.
24:47 Why?
24:47 May God bless your brother.
24:50 (Laughs)
24:51 You see so much happiness.
24:54 Show him this happiness.
24:56 Shall I sing a little Sarai song?
24:58 Yes, sing.
24:58 Yes, in the name of God.
24:59 "The queen is in front of me."
25:05 Yes.
25:07 "She never cries."
25:09 Yes.
25:10 "She never gets upset."
25:14 Wow.
25:15 "She never says this sentence six times."
25:19 Yes.
25:20 "She never says it in front of me."
25:23 Yes.
25:23 Wow.
25:26 "She has come with a palanquin."
25:33 Wow.
25:34 "She has come with a palanquin."
25:38 Wow.
25:39 "She has come to my eyes like a grave."
25:44 Wow.
25:45 "She has come to bury her sorrows here."
25:48 Wow.
25:49 Wow.
25:52 Father, on my behalf, I will give you Rs. 20000.
25:56 But I will keep your Rs. 20000.
25:59 No, I will show you my happiness now.
26:00 No.
26:01 For the first time.
26:02 No, there is another reason.
26:03 What is it?
26:04 He is a great scholar.
26:05 Yes.
26:06 "Whether you like it or not."
26:12 Yes.
26:13 "It is born."
26:14 Okay, Mr. Danish.
26:18 Yes.
26:18 I am happy that there is someone younger than Danish.
26:21 Viewers, we will take a short break.
26:26 We will meet after the break.
26:28 It is a sad thing that many houses have been destroyed.
26:33 People have.. I mean, children have died.
26:36 The wife has left the house.
26:38 What was the reason behind it?
26:39 Sir, in Farsi, we say 'afsoz'..
26:42 Welcome back, viewers.
26:57 Now our segment is 'Jahan-e-Danish'.
26:59 Yes.
27:00 Sir.
27:01 Really?
27:02 How did 'Jahan-e-Danish' come to this meaning?
27:05 In 'Jahan-e-Danish',
27:07 the thing I want to talk about today is that
27:10 there is a thing in the world
27:12 which is called 'survivor's bias'.
27:14 What does it mean?
27:15 It means that we only see what we can see.
27:21 We never see what we cannot see.
27:24 How can we see what we cannot see?
27:26 This is the question.
27:28 The fact is that whenever we take decisions in life
27:32 about anything, like business, relationships,
27:36 friendships and other things,
27:39 we always keep in mind what we can see.
27:44 Yes.
27:45 Your question is pertinent.
27:47 How can we see what we cannot see?
27:50 For example, you know that there is something behind the wall.
27:54 Yes.
27:54 Until you know that, don't take a decision about that wall.
27:59 Let me explain it to you in another way.
28:00 People say that people read the cover and guess the content.
28:05 Yes.
28:05 You shouldn't do that.
28:07 You should read what is not written in the letter.
28:10 Wow.
28:11 Let me give you another example.
28:12 Often, when someone asks you,
28:15 your friend, your close relative, your brother,
28:18 'How are you?'
28:19 We formally say, 'I am fine.'
28:21 Actually, he is not asking you how you are.
28:25 He is telling you that he loves you.
28:27 Yes.
28:28 Wow.
28:28 When a friend of yours hugs you and says,
28:32 'Irza, I kept thinking about you last night.'
28:34 She is not saying that.
28:36 She is saying that she loves you so much
28:39 that when you are worried, I am worried too.
28:41 Sorry, sir. I know a little about this.
28:43 People have understood the meaning of this.
28:46 When I ask someone, 'How are you?'
28:50 Yes.
28:51 He immediately thinks that he needs something.
28:53 Yes.
28:54 He thinks that he needs some work or money.
28:56 He is asking about the situation.
28:58 Is there anything?
29:00 He says that there is no situation.
29:01 I am asking him about the work.
29:04 Yes.
29:04 He says that he has not been paid for two months.
29:06 He brings the money at night.
29:08 He says that he is not paid.
29:10 Actually, Mr. Agar, you are one of those people.
29:13 You are saying this.
29:14 Okay. This is about people.
29:18 Yes.
29:19 Even about business.
29:20 We always see what is visible.
29:23 Let me clear this for you.
29:25 Whenever you take business decisions,
29:27 you see what is not visible.
29:28 For example, in 1940, when the Great War was going on,
29:32 America made a team of people
29:35 who knew statistics and mathematics.
29:39 They were asked to tell them
29:42 what the war figures were saying
29:46 and how they could attack their enemies.
29:48 Yes.
29:49 During this time, an incident happened
29:51 that all the ships that came back to Germany after bombing
29:55 would see where they were shot.
29:58 They collected the data of many ships.
30:02 After many ships, they made a map of the ship.
30:06 They said that there were the most number of bullets
30:08 on the tail, the back and the fuel tank.
30:13 Yes.
30:13 They asked them to arm the ship
30:16 at these three or four places
30:18 so that the ship is safe.
30:19 There was a mathematician named Abraham Wald.
30:23 He went ahead.
30:24 He said that we should never make this mistake in life.
30:27 We should never arm the ship from this place
30:29 where there were more bullets.
30:30 They said, "Are you out of your mind?
30:33 "This is where the most number of bullets are fired."
30:35 He said, "Can you see the ship?"
30:38 "It has returned. It has been shot here."
30:40 "It means that if there are bullets here,
30:43 the ship returns."
30:45 Wow!
30:47 Amazing!
30:48 "Arm it there so that it doesn't return."
30:51 Yes.
30:52 Wow!
30:52 So, they left the places where there were no bullets
30:57 and armed the ships that had returned.
30:59 Not on the basis of probabilities, but on the basis of statistics.
31:02 Exactly.
31:03 Another example is from restaurants.
31:05 You see that some restaurants are very popular.
31:09 When a rich man goes to eat, he says,
31:11 "Shall I start a restaurant business?"
31:12 Yes.
31:13 You only see what is popular.
31:16 Because in the world, many restaurants are made.
31:20 They don't run the restaurant for three years.
31:22 They close within three years.
31:23 That's right.
31:24 If a restaurant runs for five to seven years,
31:27 then it becomes a big, good and successful restaurant.
31:31 If you count that,
31:33 it is in lakhs.
31:34 You say, "I will never do a restaurant business."
31:38 This is called survivor bias.
31:40 You only see what is successful.
31:42 We can directly link the survivor bias
31:45 with critical thinking.
31:47 Absolutely.
31:48 There are many countries where there is a concept of 10th man.
31:51 Hollywood has named it.
31:53 But the concept is that it is a very obvious thing.
31:56 Nine people say that it will happen.
31:59 So, it is the responsibility of the 10th man
32:02 to think the opposite.
32:03 And to give all the details about it.
32:06 Thank God.
32:07 This is the first thing that has come without a film.
32:09 No, Mr. Ishaan. You are not right.
32:12 The matter has started from Hollywood.
32:13 Hollywood only makes films.
32:15 Only films are made in Hollywood.
32:16 Only films are made.
32:17 What else is made?
32:18 Why didn't they name it as Hollywood films?
32:21 They have named it as Hollywood.
32:22 All the films are made in that.
32:23 In any case, the society that wants to progress
32:25 should see everything from all the aspects of the world.
32:28 Only then it will survive.
32:29 Wow! This is absolutely right.
32:31 Now people think that we become comedians
32:37 after seeing the salaries of Agha Majid and Saleem Albela.
32:39 Yes.
32:40 Okay. People who think..
32:41 I often think, Irza..
32:44 When I came to this field, I saw many people
32:48 who do not have this field.
32:50 Yes.
32:51 They don't have acting, comedy, punch
32:55 or knowledge of timing.
32:57 I am not discouraging anyone.
33:00 But if you have worked for 10-15 years
33:03 and still you have not improved even a percent..
33:06 No.
33:07 ..then it is possible that nature has given you some other talent.
33:11 But Mr. Haroon, you have told Amanat so many things
33:14 that he did not even eat here.
33:15 I have started my work.
33:19 Many people meet me and directly say
33:22 that they want to do an ARY.
33:24 Direct.
33:25 Okay.
33:26 They say that they don't want to go through any process.
33:29 Look, they think that your ARY has so much power
33:34 that they are not letting you out.
33:36 Anyway, there are many people.
33:42 I say that those who are trying their luck, may God bless them.
33:46 Amen.
33:48 It is a sad thing that many houses have been destroyed.
33:53 People have lost their children.
33:56 The wife has left the house.
33:58 What was the 'Bain' in this?
33:59 Sir, in Farsi, this is called 'Afsoz'.
34:01 But I think that it is not necessary
34:06 that everyone does comedy in this field.
34:08 Many times, you have to be the pillar of love.
34:10 Yes. - Exactly.
34:11 You have to present yourself so that you can be funny.
34:15 Mr. Agha, how many times have you been the pillar of love?
34:18 Sir, there is no rocket science for that.
34:22 I don't have to be the pillar of love.
34:24 I should be. - Exactly.
34:25 When you become the pillar of love on this
34:28 you will surely get a few punches.
34:31 You have to shoot the arrow that will pierce your heart.
34:35 Wow. - Wow.
34:37 Amazing.
34:38 Sir, Mr. Aman used to say..
34:40 Did Mr. Aman meet you?
34:42 Yes, sir. We are from the same locality.
34:44 Yes. He is from Ahoni Chhattiya.
34:47 Okay. He was a very humble man.
34:49 He used to meet you. - Yes.
34:50 Sir, he used to say that it is not necessary
34:52 that everyone should be the best man.
34:53 How do you say that?
34:55 Didn't you think about it?
34:57 Didn't you think about this sentence?
34:58 He used to say that it is not necessary
35:02 that everyone should be the best man.
35:04 Not the best man, but the best man.
35:08 We have a lot of money.
35:09 We have spent it all. - Okay.
35:11 I have been to Haroon Sahib. - Yes.
35:13 He has made a transfer to the entire locality.
35:16 So what?
35:17 I think he has made a zero out of 500.
35:19 Mr. Aman was in this field.
35:26 But he was a great man.
35:28 Amazing. - Amazing.
35:30 You will be surprised that once Mr. Aman came to me.
35:34 May God bless him. - Amen.
35:36 He came and said that he wants to produce a drama in Faisalabad.
35:41 And I will need this much money for it.
35:44 I need a producer.
35:46 And it is possible, he said it himself,
35:48 that this drama will flop.
35:50 But if it flops,
35:52 I will pay the entire amount to that person.
35:57 Otherwise, we will distribute the profit.
36:00 I introduced him to a person.
36:02 And I still..
36:03 I mean, we can only pray for him.
36:06 I still remember that the drama flopped.
36:09 It didn't work.
36:10 And he had already paid all the artists.
36:15 He came to my house.
36:16 And he called that person.
36:18 And he paid the entire amount.
36:21 And he said that he has found out in these three days
36:25 that this drama will flop.
36:27 You can go and collect your money.
36:28 Wow. - Wow.
36:31 Viewers, this was today's show.
36:33 We will meet you in the next show.
36:35 Take care.
36:37 Goodbye.
36:38 ♪ Hoshi ya liya, hoshi ya liya ♪

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