• 4 months ago
Frasier Season 2 Episode 9 Adventures In Par Adise Pt 2

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TV
Transcript
00:00I just opened up the pages of Seattle magazine and there she was. Oh my, who is this fresh angel?
00:10Madeline Marshall? Why did I just come right out and say it? Would you be so good as to have dinner
00:16with me tonight? I was wondering what you thought about us going away for the weekend. Roz, I'm in
00:23love. So off I flew to Bora Bora and did I receive the shock of my life? Fraser?
00:39Oh my god. Fraser?
00:46Oh my god!
00:53Madeline, what are you doing here? I suppose I could ask you the same thing.
01:01Fraser, is everything all right? Uh, yes, yes. Uh, why don't you come out and join us, Madeline?
01:08What about you? You here with someone? Yes, actually. He's snorkeling at the moment.
01:16Anyone I know? Sam Malone. Sam!
01:23Just kidding. Oh, places. Lilith, why did you bring him here?
01:29Well, it was spectacular five years ago when you brought me. It's even more breathtaking now.
01:35But this was an odd place. I'll be delivering someone else.
01:39Oh, look at that. Lilith, I'd like you to meet Madeline Marshall. How's this for a hoot? This is my
01:49ex-wife, Lilith. Your ex-wife is here? Yes. What a shame, too. No papers to be signed.
02:01So you're here with someone? Why does everyone keep asking me that? Yes, I am.
02:06Oh, here he comes now. Brian. Dr. Brian Patchett. I'd like you to meet Madeline Marshall. Hello.
02:15And Dr. Fraser Crane. Your ex-husband? You're making a joke. No, God is.
02:24Pleasure to meet you. Likewise. Brian is a seismologist at MIT. Oh, well, that's perfect.
02:32Brian being a seismologist and you having so many faults.
02:42Lilith, you're laughing. Oh, I laugh quite a bit these days, thanks to Brian.
02:49Madeline is just hilarious. She also designs her own line of sportswear.
02:55I'm sorry, I don't think I've ever worn sportswear.
02:58So, how long are you going to stay? Until Tuesday. We're here till Wednesday.
03:11Well, this certainly has the potential to be very awkward.
03:28Why don't we diffuse the situation by getting together for cocktails later? Better yet, let's
03:34have dinner. That's a wonderful idea. Why don't we meet in the tiki room at six o'clock? Great.
03:40Looking forward to it. A wonderful way to start out what promises to be the greatest week of our
03:48lives. You see how Mr. Perfect kept rubbing it in just to get my goat? Fraser, relax. Oh,
04:02like he had to climb that tree to get her a coconut. There were three of them on the ground.
04:06Would you stop obsessing? Come here. Okay.
04:24Hold it. What's that? What's what? Lilith is making love in there.
04:31I don't hear a thing. Exactly.
04:42Would you just concentrate on me, please? Oh, you're right. You're right. It's not like it
04:49was back in college when that sort of thing was going on in the next room and I was left
04:53all alone with nothing but my dreams and my Henry Miller collection.
04:57You're right. I just got to block it out of my mind. Just
04:59try to focus and concentrate on the task at hand. Oh, that's sexy.
05:11You're right. Forgive me. You want sexy? I'll show you sexy.
05:27Oh, I feel dirty. Good. No, no, I mean Sandy from sitting on the beach.
05:37Just let me take a shower. Okay. Don't be long. When I come back,
05:45I'll make you forget you were ever married to Lilith. That's never happened before without a
05:50prescription. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
06:06Oh, yeah.
06:21Oh, it's never been like this before. Never.
06:30Nothing. Damn her. She can give as good as she gets.
06:37Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, mama. Oh, no, you are so hot. I am burning up.
06:51That's it. That's it. Yes. Yes. Oh, my God. Yes.
06:58Keep it up, baby. Oh, you're killing me.
07:14Well, obviously, you don't need me.
07:17Well, before we go to our eye in the sky chopper day for a traffic report, I would like to send
07:31this confidential message to Madeline M.
07:35Madeline, I'm sure your gentleman would love an opportunity to explain his behavior,
07:42but you left the island before he had a chance and
07:49he won't return his calls or answer the notes he sent.
07:55We all know how hard it is to find love in this world and what a tragedy it is to
08:01let it slip through our fingers. I think he really cares about you.
08:08This is Dr. Fraser Crane. We'll be back in a moment.
08:13Fraser, you were wonderful. You really think she'll call if the woman doesn't respond? She
08:19doesn't have a heart. Thank you. Oh, I almost forgot. This bill came for you from your hotel
08:26and Bora Bora. Well, it's not too bad. I guess they had to charge me for the whole week.
08:34No, that's for the bed you trashed.
08:39Twenty five hundred dollars for bamboo.
08:46Hello, this is Dr. Fraser Crane. Ross, whom do we have next?
08:51We have Vic from Seattle on line three. Hello, Vic. I'm listening.
08:58Hi, Dr. Crane. Thanks for taking my call. I'm a first time caller. I'm a little nervous.
09:03Oh, just relax, Vic. I'm listening. Yeah, I'm really having a problem with women.
09:11Madeline's on line one. Dr. Crane, Vic,
09:17something's come up in the booth. You know, I have to turn you over to my very capable producer.
09:23OK. Madeline, Madeline. Hi. Oh, thanks for calling. Oh, no, no, it's OK. It's OK. I'm
09:32off the air right now. So, Vic, what's this trouble you're having with women? I don't know.
09:39You know, I have I have a good job. I think I have a good personality. Of course,
09:43I made more money when I was modeling, but I'm doing OK at the law firm. Tell me more.
09:51Maris will be thrilled you're coming to see her tonight in the ballet.
09:54Oh, we're delighted. You know, when I was younger, I dreamed of being a ballerina myself.
10:03So did Maris. The poor thing could never get her weight up enough.
10:12That's why I couldn't help myself at the ballet for a long time.
10:15That's why I couldn't help myself with the ballet fundraiser when they auctioned off this walk on
10:22part. It was the perfect gift for my Maris. So Maris is going to be a ballerina? No,
10:28it's non-dancing, but it is a key role, Dad. She plays Ulrich, the hunchbacked drawbridge operator.
10:38I hope we can pick her out.
10:39What are you people still doing here? Oh, hush. We'll be long gone before your lady friend gets
10:49here. You don't want to be late for the ballet. I do. And those ballet guys start flying around
10:54those tight pants. I don't know where to look. That reminds me, I've got to bring me binoculars.
11:03Oh, will you just get out of here? Frasier, will you relax? I can't. It's my last chance,
11:11madam. Serves me right, too, after the way I behaved in Bora Bora. You're being too hard
11:16on yourself. It was just bad luck. How were you to know that Lilith had arrived on the island?
11:21Aside from the seas starting to churn and all the birds taking flight from the trees.
11:27Oh, now, don't you worry, Dr. Crane. Miss Marshall's going to forgive you. Women always
11:33appreciate a man who's sensitive enough to try again. That's why they call us the fair sex.
11:40All right, then. Let's go see some leaping Russian stags.
11:48Oh, hi, Maddie. Hello. Oh, hello. We were just leaving for the ballet.
11:54We were just leaving for the ballet. Madeline, come in. You two kids, take your time.
12:00Don't worry about us. We'll be out all evening.
12:04You know how it is. First the ballet, then the inevitable discussion.
12:08Oh, that was a little awkward. So is this.
12:25I guess there's no delaying it. I might as well just launch into my little speech,
12:30try to explain why I behaved the way I did. You know what might be better? If I tell you
12:36how I've got it worked out. The minute you saw Lilith, you wanted to leave, but I wouldn't let
12:42you. You said you couldn't handle it, and by God, you were right. You panicked, and your panic took
12:54a bad turn. A spectacularly bad turn. Anyway, that's how I've got it worked out in my head,
13:01and it's fragile, so let's not mess with it. So why don't you mix up a picture of my ties and
13:09give me a kiss? I'll let you guess which I want first.
13:18Guess again.
13:28Mmm, delicious. I love mangoes. Well, we never got around to sampling this tropical
13:40delicacy while we were in the islands, so I thought we should do it now. Good thinking.
13:45Mmm. You know, there's something else we never got around to in Bora Bora.
13:57Well, you got around to it. I just watched.
14:07Well, how about a little audience participation this time?
14:15Okay.
14:19Prez, wait. I want this as much as you do, but there's something I need to talk to you about
14:26first. What? Well, I wasn't gonna say anything. I thought I was comfortable with this, and I
14:33wouldn't have to bring it up, but... Well, I was involved with a divorced man once before,
14:40and just about the time that I was really falling for him,
14:43he reconciled with his ex-wife, and I'm telling you, I just can't go through that again.
14:50All right, Madeline. Trust me. I assure you that Lilith and I are completely finished.
14:57She lives clear on the other side of the country, except in matters of our son,
15:02we don't even have contact. That's all I wanted to hear.
15:22Well, what's your name, little fellow?
15:32I promise you won't laugh.
15:51A dog.
15:55His name is Eddie.
15:56Come on. Pardon me while I put him back where he belongs. I'll be waiting.
16:26Oh, God!
16:30It's nice to see you, too. Is Frasier here?
16:34Don't you live in Boston?
16:37I'm here on a layover, and judging by Frasier's trademark mangles on a stick, so are you.
16:52If you like, I can come back in 10 minutes.
16:56That won't be necessary. I apologize for coming at an inopportune moment, but Frasier and I have
17:07an agreement that we'll make time for each other if either one of us has something urgent to
17:12discuss, which I do. Take all the time you need. This whole thing's just a little too complicated
17:20for me.
17:50Put down that mango, my dear. It's time you tasted the forbidden fruit.
18:15Lilith! What are you doing here?
18:19I have something urgent to discuss.
18:21What have you done with Madeline?
18:26She was surprised to see me, and she left. I hope you're not angry with me.
18:32Angry? What do I have to be angry about? Just because every time I carve out the
18:38tiniest little slice of happiness for myself, you come along and obliterate it?
18:42My God, woman, I drive a stake through your heart, but I don't think anything could kill you!
18:49Brian asked me to marry him.
18:59What?
19:02He wants to stop in Las Vegas on our way home.
19:09You're getting married?
19:12Yes.
19:13Well, so am I.
19:19Really?
19:24Yes, yes, to Madeline.
19:27Well, I just saw Madeline. She seemed in an awful hurry for someone who's getting married.
19:32She had to buy a dress.
19:38Oh, God, what am I doing?
19:42I'm not getting married.
19:44Wow, you really had me going.
19:49Frazier, I don't want to disrupt anything.
19:54Really, I just came here hoping to get your blessing.
19:58Who could have given you my blessing over the phone?
20:02Must you be so churlish?
20:04Oh, I think I'm entitled.
20:06You know, the one comfort in being divorced is that you're both losers.
20:11Eventually the time comes when one person is the first to move on.
20:15And quite frankly, I'd hoped it would be me.
20:22Well, I'd hoped it would be me, and it was.
20:28But I'd like to think that had things worked out the other way around,
20:32I would have been happy for you.
20:38Well, if you love him, I am happy for you.
20:42I do.
20:43Brian has been a dutiful suitor for some time,
20:46and I'm convinced to within an acceptable margin of error that he loves me.
20:59Does Frederick like him?
21:01Oh, he's crazy about him.
21:03Oh.
21:05Oh, Frazier.
21:07Brian could never take your place that way.
21:10You're Frederick's father.
21:17Congratulations.
21:24Wow, it looks like they made up.
21:27Ah!
21:40Hello, everyone.
21:41Lilith, what a pleasant surprise.
21:44Now, how is Bora Bora?
21:49I've never seen you looking quite so tan.
21:57My God, what does she look like in winter?
22:02Everyone, we have some very happy news.
22:04Lilith is going to be married again.
22:08To who?
22:11Someone else.
22:12Oh, that's great!
22:16Wonderful!
22:26Just wonderful.
22:27When's the happy occasion?
22:28Uh, tomorrow in Las Vegas.
22:31Oh, Lilith, how delightfully kitschy.
22:35It's your second marriage, so you've decided to poke fun at the institution
22:38by getting married in the tackiest place you could possibly choose.
22:48Brian's family lives in Las Vegas.
22:52Well, isn't that convenient?
22:56You'll have someone to show you the museums.
23:09It was lovely seeing you all again.
23:14I'll just walk you out.
23:25Well, I hope you haven't found all this too unsettling.
23:29No, no.
23:32You know, it's actually good that you're getting remarried.
23:35Knowing us, we could have spent the rest of our lives wondering whether a divorce was a mistake.
23:40We should have tried to work it out.
23:43Was it me? Was it you? Was it us? Was it you?
23:51Now we can move on.
23:54What's next for you?
23:57I suppose I'll try to smooth things over with Madeline.
24:01Try very hard, Frasier.
24:03She seems worth it.
24:06Well, she'll need convincing.
24:08You know, I guess I could ask her back to Bora Bora with me, try again.
24:12You know, I'll lay on the whole package this time.
24:14I'll buy the airplane tickets first, and pay for the hotel,
24:18get a limo, champagne, a little caviar, the whole nine yards,
24:24and then luck, I'll sweep her off her feet and into my bed.
24:30I do own it, you know.
24:33I do.
24:39Would you like to kiss the bride?
24:42It'd be my pleasure.
24:47You're really happy for me?
24:49Well, yes, of course.
24:51You understand, though, if I don't jump up and down and yell yippee.
24:56Yes, I've already seen that.
25:02Now, why don't we pick up where we left off, Frasier?
25:33Oh, my God.
25:34Frasier?
25:38Oh, my God!
25:43Oh, no.
25:55Oh, God, I just had the most frightening dream.
26:00Thank God I'm here with you.
26:03Frasier, we have all week to analyze your dream.
26:10Right now, there's a huge bug in the shower.
26:25Hey, baby, I hear the blues are calling tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
26:38Quite stylish.
26:40And maybe I seem a bit confused.
26:42Well, maybe, but I got you picked.
26:48But I don't know what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
26:55They're calling again.
26:58Frasier has left the building.

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