Kahey Faqeer - Host: Abdul Rauf - Speaker: Sarfaraz Shah - 1 Sep 2024 - ARY Qtv

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Kahey Faqeer - Host: Abdul Rauf - Speaker: Sarfaraz Shah

#KaheyFaqeer #SarfarazShah #ARYQtv

An hour for spiritual education where our Speaker Sarfaraz A Shah will highlight the importance of Islamic teaching in our day today life and how we can balance it. As these days our young generation is going so far from these teachings but in this hour, we will give answers to those questions which are rising in their minds.

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Transcript
00:00In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, Ever Merciful, Peace be upon you.
00:11I welcome you to the program, Kaif Faqeer.
00:14We have with us, as always, Syed Sahib Shahzad Ahmad Shahzad Sahib.
00:17And the questions that you receive, as you can see, our format is the same.
00:21We will put that in front of Shahzad Sahib.
00:23We will give you a source of guidance, so that you can benefit from it in your life.
00:29So, please do follow it.
00:30Shahzad Sahib, I have received a comment.
00:33If you allow me, I will start from there.
00:35It says, whoever has something, they have to share it.
00:41Therefore, we should never complain about people's attitudes.
00:44It is not necessary that everyone's pockets are filled with pearls of love,
00:47sincerity, acceptance and selflessness.
00:51There is no doubt about it.
00:54You will be able to give others what is in your pocket.
00:59Therefore, the wise people keep their tongues shut due to complaints.
01:15This is because they are accepting the other person as he is.
01:25When we make this a habit, this is the path of Faqr.
01:29It is a matter of Tassawuf.
01:32A poor person accepts everyone as they are.
01:39There is no doubt about it.
01:40Therefore, you will hear that there is no doubt about the words of a poor person.
01:46He has no complaints about anyone.
01:49Because he is accepting everyone as they are.
01:53The concept of this is that my Lord has made it.
01:57It is the creation of my Lord.
02:02Therefore, I cannot object to it.
02:05Because I am a slave and the master is sitting on top of me.
02:11And no slave can raise his finger against his master.
02:16This is the concept of a Fakir.
02:20The second aspect of this is that if we make this a habit,
02:26if we train ourselves to accept everyone as they are,
02:32and if we learn to share our time accordingly,
02:39then our life becomes very easy.
02:42Our stresses reduce.
02:46This is one aspect.
02:47However, there is another aspect to this.
02:51That is what Hazrat Ali Karmal said,
02:55that a friend is someone who can inform you of your shortcomings when you are alone.
03:07Okay.
03:09So, if we are close to someone,
03:12then the condition of friendship is that when he is alone,
03:16we should not embarrass him in front of everyone.
03:19But when he is alone,
03:21we should inform him in appropriate words so that he does not feel embarrassed.
03:27We should inform him that there is a need for improvement here.
03:31Improve this.
03:34So, that is one aspect that will remain.
03:37If we have this Fakir attitude,
03:42then it is necessary that if a person is close to us,
03:46then we should inform him when he is alone that there is a need for improvement here.
03:56If he improves, then he will become more popular.
04:02So, if we inform him in this way, then these three aspects are formed.
04:07But it is a beautiful thing.
04:09And it is a great lesson in life.
04:12It is a very easy way to make life comfortable.
04:17I remember that a long time ago, we had completed a programme on this,
04:21in which you said that it is better to inform when you are alone.
04:28There was a question from a person,
04:30in which he said that his boss is very arrogant.
04:33And he would say something in front of everyone that he didn't like,
04:37and it would break people's hearts.
04:41So, I think that this aspect of yours becomes very important.
04:48So, please tell us that the attitude of a person,
04:56When someone has something,
05:00then there can be a problem that the person is asking for something else,
05:07and he is getting something else.
05:11Should we stop asking for something?
05:13Should we stop going to such a person?
05:16If he has selfishness,
05:23if he is strict,
05:25if he has a temper,
05:29then should we stop going to such a person?
05:33No, I don't think that is possible.
05:36We have to live in this world.
05:38We live together.
05:40We are connected to each other.
05:43So, this is not possible.
05:45How many people can we leave?
05:48But, as you mentioned about a previous program,
05:54we must have spoken about it.
05:56I must have quoted it.
06:00No person is born bad.
06:04God has created every human being innocent.
06:09A newborn baby is like a blank sheet of paper.
06:18This is the responsibility of its guardians, its guardians, and its parents.
06:25It is their right to write some inappropriate words on that blank sheet of paper,
06:39or write beautiful things,
06:43or write a hadith.
06:45This is the responsibility of the parents.
06:48That baby is a newborn.
06:51Its mind is like a blank sheet of paper.
06:58Human behavior is dependent on many factors.
07:07The major deciding factor in this is the situation in which it is living.
07:15It is also possible that it is a single parent child.
07:19Its personality will be imbalanced.
07:23It is also possible that in the house in which it is brought up,
07:28there will be a fight between the parents.
07:31There will not be a happy relationship.
07:33Such a child will have transgressions.
07:36It is also possible that the elderly people around it,
07:45if their language is not very decent,
07:50they will learn the same language.
07:54It is also possible that where it was brought up,
07:56everyone is loud.
08:01This will also become loud.
08:05In these attitudes, a person has very little control over himself.
08:10I am not suggesting that this is not the case.
08:14But it is very rare.
08:17These are the circumstances of its childhood
08:20that determine its behavior.
08:25You must have met some of your friends.
08:30They are very generous.
08:33They will volunteer for the needs of their friends.
08:38If you do a little research,
08:41you will come to know that in the house in which it was brought up,
08:45this was its behavior.
08:49Some children's behavior can be the other way around.
08:55If you look at the house in which it was brought up,
08:59there will be the same behavior.
09:02So, a person's behavior is dependent
09:05on the circumstances in which it was brought up.
09:11So, instead of being angry with such a person,
09:14instead of running away from such a person,
09:16we should be compassionate towards such a person.
09:18And we should try to supplement the incomplete aspect of such a person.
09:31We should support such a person.
09:34Now, there are some children, for some reason,
09:40either they are single parents or they have no parents.
09:46Now, such a child, invariably,
09:50you will get a hunger for love.
09:54And in search of love, if he goes to different places, he will be beaten.
09:58If he is beaten, he will be insulted.
10:01If you give love to such a child,
10:03if you make such a person believe that he is your friend who really loves you,
10:12his behavior will become very sincere and loyal to you.
10:18So, we should not hate him, we should not run away from him,
10:22we should not leave him alone.
10:24In fact, take out some time, examine him,
10:30and see what was lacking in this child in his childhood,
10:35which made his behavior like this.
10:40There are some people, there are some children,
10:42who are not given importance by their parents.
10:46By not being given importance, they develop a feeling of deprivation.
10:52And that feeling of deprivation increases so much
10:56that when they come in such a position where their parents are there,
11:03in 90% of cases,
11:06their behavior will be such that they will be happy by insulting others.
11:11They will be comforted by that.
11:13They will go to a 10% positive side,
11:16that whatever I did not get, I will share it with others.
11:21But it will not be more than 10%.
11:2490% of people will be happy,
11:28they will be comforted by insulting others,
11:34by depriving others.
11:38So, there is only one treatment for such people,
11:40that we should look at them very quietly.
11:44When a person becomes a new officer,
11:48he has a strange behavior.
11:51He gets angry with everyone who does not greet him.
11:57He develops.
12:00His behavior becomes normalized.
12:03When he becomes a big officer in the real sense,
12:07he has a strange behavior.
12:09And there is a change in everyone.
12:12If someone is rude to him,
12:16he does not punish him.
12:18He says, you are not in the right frame of mind.
12:24You go, I will call you again.
12:27He will call the person close to him and ask, what happened to him?
12:31Check if he has any problem at home.
12:35He normally does not behave like this.
12:38His behavior is unusual.
12:41So, check and tell me,
12:43is there any problem at home?
12:46Does anyone else have a problem with him?
12:48Mr. Shah, I am sorry, we have to take a short break.
12:50Please allow us to take a break.
12:52We will be back after the break.
12:54Welcome back.
12:55If there is a person who behaves like this,
12:59and he is being given sympathy,
13:02or even more than that,
13:04he is being given love.
13:06Can love bring about fundamental changes in him?
13:10So that he becomes a better person in the rest of his life?
13:13Absolutely right.
13:14Look, this is your wall.
13:18When it was being built,
13:21there was a shortage of mortar based on proper ratio.
13:30It was chosen from Gare.
13:34Now, when it has rained a lot,
13:38the mud from which it was chosen,
13:42the exposed parts of it have melted due to the rain.
13:47The wall has become weak.
13:50Now, there are two options.
13:51One is to build a wall along with it.
13:56Or, from wherever the mud has melted,
14:01proper mortar should be injected there.
14:07Or, it should be constructed in a new way.
14:09It is not possible to construct it in a new way.
14:12You will have to change the entire building for it.
14:16So, it is better to see what is the best remedy for it,
14:21which will give it strength.
14:24So, that should be treated.
14:26So, this is how a person's personality is made.
14:31If there is a shortage of things due to which his behaviours have become unpleasant,
14:39or if he is not very desirable,
14:45or if he has a lot of ego,
14:48then if we take out a little time
14:53and pinch him so that he starts talking about his childhood,
14:58then we can find out where he had lagged in his childhood.
15:03If we fill that gap,
15:06then his behaviour will improve.
15:08And love is such a thing.
15:13It is perhaps the most powerful thing in the world.
15:15It is more powerful than an atom bomb.
15:23There is a beast in the jungle.
15:26It is a lion, a cheetah, a reed.
15:31It is a wild beast.
15:34It does not leave a person, it eats them.
15:38But love can tame it as well.
15:41Love has so much power.
15:44So, you should not think about any person's behaviour
15:48and what his behaviour is with me.
15:51You have to create a little big ego in yourself.
15:55Love distributes that.
15:59There comes a time when he will be very good,
16:03and he will make you a very loyal and sincere friend.
16:08Love has a lot of power.
16:11How important is change for a person?
16:15Shouldn't a person be satisfied that the way life is going on is better?
16:23Change is a sign of life.
16:31If this change leaves a person's life,
16:34then he is dead.
16:36Peace is only in death.
16:38Yes.
16:40People who have status,
16:46they are not able to progress.
16:48Only those who are dynamic are able to progress.
16:53And dynamism will only bring change in life.
17:03So, we should not be afraid of change.
17:05This is a sign of our life.
17:08We are alive.
17:10So, the habit of sadness on one's own condition...
17:13That is a different thing.
17:15It has nothing to do with change.
17:17Okay.
17:19Satisfaction is when a person is satisfied with what he has.
17:31So, whatever we are getting,
17:35or in simple words,
17:38what is satisfaction?
17:42It is to be satisfied with the distribution of Allah.
17:46But change is a completely different thing.
17:49Okay.
17:51I am satisfied with what I am getting,
17:54but I am trying to improve it.
17:59So, if I am not satisfied with what I am getting,
18:05then I will become a very unpleasant personality for people,
18:10that I will have nothing but complaints.
18:20So, we should know one thing,
18:22that every person is so under pressure in this world,
18:27that he expects pleasant conversations from you.
18:33He wants a pleasant company.
18:36He will throw away a pleasant company.
18:42So, we will become unpleasant.
18:45But, along with satisfaction,
18:50I am working hard to move forward.
18:53That is a separate issue.
18:55Despite being satisfied, I should keep trying.
19:03That is a separate issue.
19:05The question is, if our lives are being victimised by the Jammut,
19:10then what should be the solution?
19:13Should we pray or should we try?
19:16This is a very big bell of danger.
19:20If the Jammut starts ringing on a person,
19:23this is a bell that is ringing to warn you of a very big danger.
19:28We should remember one thing,
19:30that Allah likes those who are like Mujahidin,
19:39who are obedient, who are hard-working.
19:45Allah does not like lazy people.
19:47Allah does not like those who are ungrateful.
19:50If there is a period of stagnation in our lives,
19:54I am using the term of Jammut,
19:58then we should try our best,
20:03whether it is a mental, physical or spiritual condition.
20:14Interactual, physical or spiritual.
20:17If we notice a Jammut in any condition,
20:22then we should be alert that something is going wrong somewhere.
20:29We should take the corrective measures.
20:35The corrective measures are to become active,
20:38to take part in the activities of life.
20:43Otherwise, the Jammut will break.
20:45The question is, this is Ahmed Shehzad,
20:49and he says that we are happy if we change our will because of being human,
20:54but if something changes in our planned life,
20:57then why would we be unhappy?
20:59This is in human nature.
21:04But the Muslims have this facility,
21:09that in the case of failure,
21:12they have a huge consolation factor,
21:19that this is what Allah wanted and this is what is best for me.
21:24This is a huge consolation factor.
21:30So, a person cannot be disappointed.
21:36We will have to develop something within us,
21:41which is that we will have to trust Allah,
21:44which very few people do.
21:47We all believe in Allah,
21:51but we do not trust Him.
21:55So, when a person starts trusting Allah,
22:00then he has this attitude, which I mentioned,
22:04that despite all the hard work,
22:08if the result does not come as desired,
22:12then a person thinks that it was my fault that Allah did not let this happen.
22:19So, he becomes very satisfied with this,
22:24that my hard work will not go to waste, Allah will definitely reward me for it.
22:28He did not reward me here, He will reward me elsewhere.
22:30He did not reward me here, because perhaps it was not better for me.
22:34Our conversation will continue, but we will take a break.
22:39Welcome back.
22:40If someone is continuously trying,
22:44are there any signs,
22:46where they can see that their effort is wrong,
22:50that they should try elsewhere?
22:53I always say one thing,
22:58this is called spirituality,
23:01this is called sixth sense.
23:05This has been genetically transferred within every human being.
23:11We are all the children of Adam.
23:15The knowledge that was taught to Baba Adam,
23:17it was transferred to all of us genetically.
23:24The difference is that some people develop it by putting in effort.
23:33Some people are so pious that it automatically develops within them.
23:45So, they have a very strong feeling
23:51that where they start doing something wrong,
23:53a voice comes from within them that perhaps they are doing something wrong,
23:57this should not be done.
24:01They are going on a path and a voice comes from within them
24:04that do not go on this path,
24:07it is not appropriate, take another path.
24:10This is the sense that develops.
24:13We can call it the sixth sense in the world.
24:19Spiritually, we can say that it has developed so much
24:25that Allah the Almighty continues to save it.
24:28It is a matter of developing it in every human being.
24:32And it develops in the same way
24:34when there is a high level of purity in the mind,
24:42and otherwise also.
24:44So, especially the purity of thought,
24:48that develops it a lot.
24:51A person who is pure in his thinking,
24:58this will develop a lot in him.
25:02I asked this question, it is also related to my personal life.
25:08After MA, I started preparing for CSS and did it.
25:13Now, I really wanted to go to the Foreign Service.
25:16But the Finance Department came.
25:19I used to get angry with the Finance Department,
25:21I used to get very angry.
25:23So, I thought that I will not go this year, I will try again next year.
25:27I tried again next year, but the Foreign Service did not come.
25:31I qualified, but they posted me in Islamabad as an Under Secretary.
25:37Now, I was very worried.
25:38So, I told Professor Munawar Sahib, Mirza Munawar Sahib,
25:42I told him what I should do.
25:43He said, this is not a sign for you to try in some other department or not.
25:49So, I left it up to him.
25:52So, the question that arises here is,
25:54should we take help from someone in such a matter?
25:58Or, can a person take help from himself?
26:03See, what teachings have been given to us in Islam?
26:08That you must consult.
26:10The Holy Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,
26:14has advised us and has also given us practical demonstration.
26:19That sometimes, the companions of the Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him,
26:23have accepted the advice of the companions of the Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him.
26:24Whereas, you are the greatest personality after Allah.
26:29And the knowledge that you had,
26:32apart from the knowledge of Allah, you had the greatest knowledge.
26:36Despite that, because it was intended to teach the Ummah,
26:41you gave a practical demonstration.
26:43That you consulted the companions of the Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him.
26:46So, Muslims have a very strong belief in consultations.
26:51So, you should definitely consult those people,
26:54who are senior to us in terms of age, experience and education.
27:01So, you consulted Professor Mirza Munawwar Sahib,
27:05who used to be in the Government College.
27:08So, you consulted a very good person.
27:11Allah had given him a lot of understanding.
27:15So, you have come to the right path.
27:20There was a program of yours,
27:23I found out later that I have known you since you were five years old.
27:28When you were five years old.
27:31But the first time I got to know you,
27:35it was your most famous program, 50 Minutes.
27:40Which gave you such respect and fame, which very few people got.
27:47Shah Sahib, this question is from Beanish.
27:51His question is,
27:53how much impact does our environment and relationships have on the changes that happen in our lives?
27:59It is the environment that makes up our personality.
28:05When a child comes into this world,
28:09the first breath he takes, the first scream he makes,
28:13along with that, his personality starts to build.
28:18We are mistaken that this child is only two minutes old,
28:25so how would he know?
28:29No.
28:31He is seeing that things are getting registered in his brain.
28:35And this is what is building his personality.
28:38The foundation is being laid.
28:40So, by the time he is four to five years old,
28:44the foundations of his personality have already been laid.
28:48After that, his personality is being built on those foundations.
28:55So, this environment is affecting him.
28:59If he cannot speak, he cannot express himself.
29:03But he is registering everything.
29:06So, the environment that he is getting at that time,
29:11that is the foundation of his personality.
29:14And that whole life has an impact on his behaviour.
29:21His influence remains for the rest of his life.
29:25So, this environment is very important.
29:30I would like to tell people
29:35that they should never speak in front of a child.
29:40They should never be loud.
29:44You will see that the same things will come in that child.
29:48He will have a pleasant personality.
29:50He will never be loud.
29:52Even if he scolds someone, he will speak in a very low tone.
29:59The environment is everything for a human being.
30:02Sometimes, I feel that the facial features of a human being,
30:08the handwriting,
30:11even that changes with the environment and its changes.
30:16What changes that the most?
30:19The food.
30:21The food which we take.
30:22Okay.
30:24See, when his parents got married,
30:28the daughter belongs to another family.
30:32The husband belongs to another family.
30:34They live together for the rest of their lives.
30:36At the end of their lives, you start seeing their faces.
30:38Please note that.
30:40Yes, absolutely.
30:41That is the effect of food.
30:43So, the facial features are the basis of food.
30:51But the behaviour is affected by the people's behaviour towards you.
31:03So, where there is a sense of deprivation in a person,
31:06his behaviour starts to change.
31:10Where there is a sense of difficulty,
31:14his behaviour becomes defensive.
31:19If something happens, he becomes defensive immediately.
31:22The relationships that you have,
31:26especially the relationships that are very close to your heart,
31:32the behaviour that you are getting from them,
31:36it is determining our behaviour.
31:39Or it is becoming a reason for change.
31:44So, the behaviour of the environment and others,
31:48the behaviour of the relatives,
31:51these have a deep impact on a person's personality.
31:55Okay, Mr. Shah, thank you very much.
31:57We are running out of time for the programme.
31:59Please give us your feedback.
32:00Please send us your questions.
32:03And, God willing, we will answer them and provide guidance for you.
32:08We will take your leave now.
32:09May Allah protect you.

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