Hoshyarian | Haroon Rafiq | Comedy Show | 2nd April 2024
Hoshyarian | Haroon Rafiq | Comedy Show | 2nd April 2024
Category
🗞
NewsTranscript
00:00 Assalamu Alaikum viewers, I am Haroon Rafiq and you are watching Hoshi Aariyan.
00:06 Friends, the amount of flora and fauna in the entire world,
00:10 the animals, insects, plants in the entire world,
00:15 all of them have a compulsion.
00:17 That compulsion is that they can only live one life.
00:21 God has given the ability to humans to live more than one life.
00:27 He can live multiple lives in his one life.
00:31 And the reason for that is that he can talk to others.
00:36 He can benefit from the company of others.
00:39 The elders around you,
00:41 I agree that they may not have knowledge about the things of today.
00:45 But if you talk to them,
00:47 learn about their childhood,
00:50 ask about their youth,
00:52 then you will learn a lot about your future.
00:56 Remember, there is no one more experienced than the teacher in the world.
00:59 Go and talk to them, ask questions.
01:02 We don't ask. You find their conversation boring.
01:06 Go and ask them questions.
01:07 Get the blessings of their company.
01:09 You can live multiple lives in one life.
01:12 Let's start today's show with this message.
01:14 Let's take you to the market today and see what's happening there.
01:18 Yes, yes, mother, no problem. You come.
01:21 Have some shame. Go home. You are calling your mother here.
01:25 Brother, I have a patient. I am talking to him.
01:28 Why are you calling the patient mother?
01:29 We are calling her sister, sister, sister.
01:32 It's like this.
01:33 The boy's thumb was moving.
01:36 I told him to put the last finger in the pocket.
01:39 The boy will handle the pocket. I will leave this work.
01:42 What?
01:44 He doesn't care about the last finger.
01:47 I will give him the two numbers written on the bag.
01:51 You didn't give him one number.
01:52 No problem. He will get relief.
01:54 Mr. Hakeem, I think he has good medicine for hair growth.
01:59 Look at his hair. It's coming out of the cap.
02:01 It's like a flower.
02:02 This is a tassel, not hair.
02:05 My hair is different from the real one.
02:07 Yes, yes. - I am going to wear a cap of wisdom.
02:10 Is this a cap of wisdom?
02:11 Yes, it is.
02:12 I have seen this in the market.
02:15 All the wisdom is in this cap.
02:17 How?
02:18 Look at this.
02:24 What is the best thing for hair growth?
02:26 The best thing for hair growth is..
02:28 Milk. - What?
02:31 What? - Yes, it's okay.
02:32 Drink milk. You will drink cold milk.
02:35 You will drink hot milk.
02:36 Is this a Marwari?
02:37 The boy from day before yesterday has gone.
02:39 Okay, the tongue of the village.
02:42 The tongue of the village is.. - The end of the tongue.
02:44 The end of the tongue is.. - Okay.
02:46 I don't think.. - The end of the tongue is..
02:47 ..the tip of the tongue is..
02:49 ..the tongue of the Haridas.
02:51 Have you made these samosas?
02:53 No, the boy is here. I don't know.
02:56 I don't understand where he has gone.
02:57 He has become a fool.
02:58 How did you become a fool?
03:02 I had kept it on the tip. I don't know who took it.
03:04 I like the aroma of samosas.
03:06 I can't smell the samosas.
03:10 You are so stupid.
03:11 Your son's smell has ruined everything.
03:14 What chutneys do you give with it?
03:17 I have kept it for aloo bukhara.
03:18 I have kept it for mint.
03:20 I have kept it for curd.
03:21 The village that I like..
03:23 Father.
03:24 Father. - What happened?
03:27 Doctor. - What happened?
03:28 Sit. Sit. Sit. Sit. - Doctor.
03:32 Sit. - I have a severe stomachache.
03:34 Why have you tied a cloth on your stomach?
03:35 I have come from the back to sing.
03:37 I have pain in my stomach.
03:40 Yes.
03:41 What happened?
03:42 Should I give you a massage?
03:44 Come. Come.
03:45 Listen to me.
03:48 Listen to me.
03:49 Treat father immediately. Otherwise I will give you a tight slap.
03:52 Son, give me father's kick.
03:53 She is taller than me.
03:55 What is the problem?
03:57 I have a severe pain.
03:59 Where?
03:59 I have pain in my stomach.
04:02 In the stomach?
04:03 I have pain in my left arm.
04:04 I have pain in my stomach.
04:06 Oh. - Is it a heart attack?
04:07 Who told you that you have a severe pain in your stomach?
04:10 Show your father to a good doctor.
04:14 I have brought him to the right place.
04:17 He will give us the treatment here.
04:19 He is giving me a pulse.
04:21 Mr. Keem, please treat my father.
04:23 What are you doing?
04:24 You are useless.
04:25 Oh. - I have a stomach ache.
04:27 Oh, God!
04:30 What is it?
04:31 How much samosas are you giving me?
04:33 If you have a stomach ache..
04:36 ..then a person doesn't feel like eating anything.
04:38 Yes, I have it.
04:40 I have a snack.
04:41 He is such a greedy man.
04:45 Your father has come to take medicine and not samosas.
04:49 Mr. Keem, please treat my father.
04:52 I have to do it.
04:54 Oh.
04:56 Oh. - Oh, God!
04:57 Be strong. - Oh, God!
04:59 Give me a snack.
05:01 Is it potato or minced samosa?
05:05 It is potato.
05:06 What is the matter?
05:07 One for 70 rupees.
05:08 One samosa for 70 rupees.
05:10 Oh.
05:13 Your father.. - One for 70 rupees.
05:14 Your father.. - One for 70 rupees.
05:15 One samosa for 70 rupees.
05:18 Your father is not sick. He is not looking at the money.
05:20 Oh.
05:23 Oh.
05:24 That's it.
05:25 The pain is not good. Heat it up.
05:27 Oh.
05:29 Check it. - Yes.
05:33 Open his mouth.
05:34 Oh. - Do it properly.
05:38 I have kept him fasting.
05:39 That's when the pain started.
05:41 What did you eat in the city?
05:44 I didn't eat anything.
05:45 Because it's a routine.
05:47 What is your routine?
05:49 Parathas. - Yes.
05:50 And eggs.
05:52 That's what happens. - Omelette.
05:53 Paratha, omelette.
05:54 The egg is right. But you must have eaten more than one paratha.
05:58 There is one thing.
05:59 I don't lie every day.
06:01 But I was making this for you.
06:03 Okay. - Is it a vegetable?
06:05 But I was making this for you.
06:08 I don't lie.
06:10 I must have lost 10 kgs.
06:12 Oh. - Oh, God!
06:15 Oh. - Hey.
06:17 Sir, you are not lying.
06:19 You are lying on this side.
06:20 Was it just paratha or there were eggs and omelette?
06:25 If you eat more, you will get a stomachache.
06:27 Yes. - One paratha.
06:28 And three omelette with eggs.
06:30 What? - That means he has eaten 30 eggs.
06:32 Oh. - Oh, God!
06:34 The more you eat eggs, the more you will get a stomachache.
06:38 Brother, when you go out in the morning,
06:40 why do you say that it's my four-month fast?
06:41 Oh. - What is this?
06:46 Oh, God! - Who is he hiding from?
06:48 He is our neighbor.
06:49 Who are you hiding from?
06:51 Sir, I don't hide from women.
06:52 Why does he do this job?
06:55 Why do you hide? - Sir, it's Eid.
06:58 Yes. - Every old woman says
06:59 that she wants a suit today.
07:00 Yes. - Which women
07:03 have to stitch suits?
07:05 Buy ready-made ones.
07:06 The ones that are stitched.
07:08 You get ready-made ones and cheap ones.
07:13 You are not ready-made. You buy ready-made ones.
07:16 He is so brave. Does it hurt here too?
07:20 Does it hurt here too?
07:22 Should a man eat less?
07:24 Is this a test?
07:26 Oh, God!
07:28 Thank God your father has small legs.
07:30 Otherwise, I would have died.
07:31 He should lose his fat.
07:33 So that I don't have a stomachache and I get a backache.
07:36 Absolutely. - He doesn't need to walk.
07:37 He needs to run.
07:39 He is just hungry.
07:42 Why are you listening to him?
07:44 You should eat less flatbreads.
07:48 Reduce your flour intake.
07:49 If I eat flatbreads, I will be cursed.
07:52 Curse you.
07:54 Then? - Parathas.
07:56 Don't make a donkey.
07:59 I don't think he is fasting. - Then?
08:01 He thinks he is eating sweets.
08:03 You should reduce your parathas.
08:07 Eat a brown bread sandwich.
08:09 It will make a difference.
08:10 Thank God!
08:13 Eat.
08:15 Really? - He eats before anyone else.
08:17 When a man's children sleep with a lock on their door..
08:21 Why? - ..they will get hungry and eat us too.
08:23 Listen to me.
08:25 Let the wind blow.
08:26 Let it blow here.
08:27 Then open your mouth and say 'Dikar'.
08:29 Come on. - Okay.
08:30 I will say 'Dikar' like this.
08:32 I will say 'Dikar' and my grandson will be saved.
08:35 Thank God, I didn't get a flatbread.
08:38 Why? - I will say 'Dikar'.
08:39 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:40 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:42 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:43 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:44 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:45 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:46 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:47 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:48 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:49 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:51 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:52 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:53 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:54 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:55 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:56 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:57 I will say 'Dikar'.
08:58 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:00 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:01 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:02 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:03 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:04 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:05 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:06 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:07 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:08 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:09 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:11 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:12 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:13 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:14 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:15 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:16 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:17 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:18 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:20 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:21 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:22 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:23 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:24 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:25 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:26 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:27 I will say 'Dikar'.
09:29 Pray for yourself.
09:30 Farzand. - Yes.
09:34 May God give you a long life.
09:37 I have heard that you run with your shoes on.
09:41 What did you hear?
09:42 I heard about your health.
09:44 I am very worried.
09:45 Is he your brother-in-law?
09:47 Yes, he is my brother-in-law.
09:48 He is my sister's husband.
09:49 Then you are worried.
09:50 Sir, please help me go to Bahrain.
09:55 What? - I want to work there.
09:57 In a foreign country.
09:58 I don't know how to work there.
10:01 Sir, I don't have the habit of
10:04 working for you for four years.
10:06 If you don't teach me how to work in a month
10:08 I will slap you.
10:09 I know how to work.
10:13 I feel like slapping you.
10:14 Sir, the clothes that are hanging here
10:20 are not that bad.
10:22 No, you won't feel bad.
10:27 You should lie down.
10:29 I am already tired.
10:31 Lie down.
10:32 Nothing will happen. - Lie down.
10:34 How long will it take to open?
10:36 It will take some time.
10:38 Because we have it open.
10:40 How much time do you have?
10:42 We open it late.
10:43 Okay. - Because of you.
10:45 You should start making fresh clothes.
10:49 You will make everyone cough.
10:50 I am not stupid.
10:52 I am already tired.
10:54 I will eat the stuff that is left.
10:56 (Laughs)
10:57 You eat so much that you can see the cabbage.
11:01 (Laughs)
11:03 Is your father a cheat?
11:05 You are a patient and you are a cheat.
11:06 (Laughs)
11:08 Father, may God give you a long life.
11:13 But I have kept the money at home.
11:16 I will take some things for him.
11:18 Sir, I came from your school last evening.
11:22 Yes. - You didn't teach me how to wear a suit.
11:25 Then why are you wearing a suit?
11:26 (Laughs)
11:27 (Crying)
11:29 What is this?
11:30 I am wearing a suit.
11:32 (Crying)
11:36 Don't cry. Don't cry.
11:37 Read. Read.
11:38 (Laughs)
11:39 I won't leave my son.
11:42 When will I leave you?
11:44 (Crying)
11:46 My grandson, Rashid.
11:47 Go and wash your face.
11:49 (Crying)
11:52 Who is he?
11:53 He is my son.
11:54 Rashid, clean the garage.
11:58 Is your father going to come there?
11:59 (Laughs)
12:01 Show him. - He is coming with a vase.
12:03 (Laughs)
12:04 (Sniffs)
12:05 You come. I will send you money for the ambulance.
12:09 (Laughs)
12:10 Uncle.
12:12 Farzand, don't leave the doctor's shop.
12:15 You are the first customer of the morning.
12:17 (Laughs)
12:17 We are also small kids.
12:19 (Crying)
12:21 Rashid.
12:23 Did you go to the graveyard?
12:26 I think this job won't be good.
12:29 Why?
12:29 Everyone is responsible for everything.
12:31 (Laughs)
12:33 Don't worry.
12:35 Nothing will happen to you.
12:36 Our mother will also come to you.
12:38 (Crying)
12:39 (Laughs)
12:42 Uncle.
12:44 You leave. I am standing here.
12:46 He is going to be tortured.
12:49 (Laughs)
12:50 (Sings)
12:55 Prabha, get my suit stitched.
12:56 Yes, sister. I have got it.
12:59 Why did you get the letter?
13:01 The situation is good.
13:04 (Laughs)
13:04 (Sings)
13:07 (Laughs)
13:08 (Sings)
13:12 I will come after you get the letter.
13:14 (Laughs)
13:15 (Sings)
13:17 Uncle, let me get the suit stitched.
13:20 It's okay. Lie down.
13:22 How much time is left?
13:24 Don't cry.
13:25 (Laughs)
13:27 Hello.
13:28 Aunt.
13:30 Mother. - Yes, son.
13:31 Aunt has come to meet you.
13:33 Where should I call her?
13:34 Bring her home.
13:36 Aunt, come home.
13:37 Mother. - Yes, son.
13:39 Aunt has come to meet you.
13:41 Where should I call her?
13:42 Call her at the shop.
13:44 (Laughs)
13:45 Rashid's phone is on my phone.
13:47 Hello.
13:48 Yes, Rashid.
13:50 He says he is ready to give it to you.
13:52 (Laughs)
13:54 (Applause)
13:56 Sir, do you want to teach him or not?
13:58 Do you want to see Eid?
13:59 Teach him. He is a good boy.
14:02 (Laughs)
14:03 Hello, doll.
14:04 Father has spoiled our Eid.
14:07 Where did you spoil it?
14:09 I am not the same.
14:11 (Laughs)
14:13 Doctor, give me the medicine.
14:15 Don't worry.
14:16 I have got it. - Yes.
14:18 He will go by ambulance.
14:20 Doctor, we are wasting time. Send him home.
14:23 Sister, I am working. I will fast.
14:26 Everything will be fine.
14:28 Do you want to eat my fakki?
14:30 Yes.
14:31 I will kill you if you eat it.
14:32 What happened?
14:33 What happened?
14:34 He will come. - He is coming.
14:35 Hey.
14:37 You are so stubborn.
14:38 Get out of my way.
14:40 Is there a shopper here?
14:41 Not just one.
14:42 (Laughs)
14:44 (Laughs)
14:45 What happened?
14:48 (Laughs)
14:49 What happened?
14:50 There is a nuisance in the stomach.
14:51 What happened?
14:52 Something is wrong.
14:53 (Gagging)
14:54 Oh.
14:54 Paratha.
14:55 (Gagging)
14:56 He is looking for a way to eat paratha.
14:58 Doctor, give me the medicine.
15:00 (Laughs)
15:02 What happened?
15:03 What happened?
15:04 Father.
15:05 Yes.
15:06 Oh, I have wasted my Eid suit.
15:09 (Laughs)
15:11 You will be ruined today.
15:13 (Laughs)
15:14 (Speaks in Urdu)
15:17 I haven't eaten yet.
15:19 No, no. You are still eating.
15:20 Thank God.
15:21 Everything is fine.
15:21 A person has ruined the whole city.
15:24 Oh.
15:25 Oh.
15:26 Come.
15:27 Is the fast over?
15:29 Is the fast over?
15:30 I will teach you a lesson.
15:32 (Laughs)
15:33 (Applause)
15:36 The fast is over.
15:37 I will break the fast.
15:38 Come on.
15:39 Come here.
15:40 Hold father's face.
15:41 Let me hold your hand.
15:41 Hold his hand.
15:42 Let me hold your hand.
15:42 Hold it.
15:43 Open your mouth.
15:44 Open your mouth.
15:45 Is it a fakir or a masala?
15:49 Hey, commenter.
15:50 Shut up.
15:51 Go.
15:52 There is no tree here.
15:53 I was going to tie it and open it.
15:54 (Grunts)
15:55 Come.
15:56 Come.
15:57 Take this.
15:58 Yes.
16:01 Doctor.
16:01 Yes.
16:02 I think something is pushing me.
16:04 Are you fine?
16:04 Yes, fakir.
16:05 Walk.
16:06 Walk.
16:06 Get up and walk.
16:07 Will the door open?
16:08 Walk.
16:09 Walk.
16:12 (Grunts)
16:19 Viewers, a small break.
16:21 You will get anywhere after this.
16:23 I want to go to their house.
16:25 I want to go wherever I want.
16:26 I want to drink tea.
16:27 Aunt, kids find themselves outside.
16:30 Kids, I have found you.
16:33 (Laughs)
16:34 How many will I give to the one wheeler?
16:36 Find me at a place where I can eat that too.
16:39 I have given you the message.
16:40 Where will I find you?
16:41 (Laughs)
16:43 Welcome back, viewers.
16:49 In the break, we have the same aunt.
16:51 She was fed up of her kids.
16:53 This time she has brought a new kid.
16:55 Let's talk to her.
16:56 Where did the new kid come from?
16:57 I have brought a boy.
16:58 (Laughs)
16:59 No, I mean to say that we have not seen this kid before.
17:03 He has come today.
17:04 Believe me, four kids brought him three months ago.
17:08 I brought one and put a handy on his back.
17:11 (Laughs)
17:11 Why is your face crooked?
17:12 It was already crooked.
17:13 And the eyes?
17:14 It was stylish.
17:15 (Laughs)
17:16 Don't give me such bad thoughts.
17:17 This is international TV.
17:19 The whole world is watching you.
17:20 Mr. Arun, I was about to complain that
17:22 this boy was staring at me and Irza since he came.
17:25 No, I was really staring.
17:26 You are a bad boy.
17:27 You think of your sister as your sister.
17:28 You will die a bachelor.
17:30 No one will give you a marriage proposal.
17:31 Believe me, you will die crying.
17:33 I am telling you.
17:34 (Laughs)
17:36 I don't understand this.
17:38 You think of every girl as your sister.
17:40 And you are talking to two sisters.
17:42 (Laughs)
17:43 In old Punjabi movies, there is a dialogue of this mother.
17:46 Yes.
17:47 "Rano's life is gone, but the mouse is still not here."
17:50 (Laughs)
17:51 Why did you bring him?
17:52 Mr. Arun, I came to assure you that
17:54 his father is dead.
17:56 He is missing.
17:57 He is visible.
17:58 (Laughs)
17:59 His father is missing.
18:01 I came to meet him because of his sorrow.
18:02 Otherwise, believe me, he is not your Malekha.
18:05 No.
18:05 He is my youth.
18:06 So, did you make a difference?
18:08 (Laughs)
18:09 So, you were also a fool.
18:11 (Laughs)
18:12 I didn't abuse him.
18:14 He has done a lot of wrong things.
18:15 What did he do?
18:16 What did he do?
18:17 He took a leaf.
18:18 Oh!
18:19 Oh!
18:20 He is a leaf eater.
18:21 He was a leaf eater when he was a kid.
18:23 Now he is a leaf eater.
18:24 (Laughs)
18:25 I know that he is a child.
18:26 He will not be able to do it.
18:28 Aunty, you should have done ultrasound earlier.
18:30 (Laughs)
18:31 (Applause)
18:33 Have some shame.
18:34 You take a leaf from poor people.
18:36 Oh, sir.
18:37 Don't look at me.
18:38 Believe me, I can't see him.
18:40 I don't know where he has gone.
18:42 He must be a coward.
18:43 (Laughs)
18:44 He is a boy, a boy, a boy.
18:47 He is a child of a rich man.
18:49 (Laughs)
18:50 He is a child of a rich man.
18:52 (Laughs)
18:53 He is a child of a rich man.
18:54 Okay.
18:55 He thinks that he is a rich man.
18:57 (Laughs)
18:58 What is your name?
18:59 Billu.
19:00 Yes, he calls me Billu.
19:01 I call him Billu.
19:04 (Laughs)
19:05 But he doesn't look like a coward.
19:08 (Laughs)
19:09 I think he is a coward.
19:11 Yes.
19:11 He looks like a coward.
19:13 He is a coward.
19:14 He gives protection to people.
19:15 People give it to us willingly.
19:17 They give it to us willingly.
19:19 Who gives it willingly?
19:20 Yes.
19:20 And a leaf is the worst example of cruelty.
19:24 You will take a leaf from someone who can't do anything.
19:27 Yes.
19:27 The day people put their decision in the court of God,
19:31 what will you do?
19:32 Will you ask God for forgiveness?
19:33 (Laughs)
19:34 I don't understand who is scared of taking a leaf.
19:36 How do you take a leaf?
19:38 I am telling you how I take a leaf.
19:40 Keep it inside.
19:41 Don't make a scene here.
19:42 Keep it inside.
19:43 I am telling you.
19:43 If he takes a leaf from poor people,
19:45 then why did you come to take it from Mr. Haroon?
19:47 I have come to take a leaf from a person who has done a bad deed.
19:50 I won't come to Haroon now.
19:52 (Laughs)
19:53 I will hold his hand and say,
19:55 your factory of leaves,
19:57 Yes.
19:57 don't you eat the leaves by cutting them?
19:59 (Laughs)
20:01 I won't do small things.
20:03 Yes.
20:03 Secondly, as a nation, we have a problem.
20:05 A very big thing is spoiled by a bad name.
20:08 What is a leaf?
20:09 Is it a new name?
20:10 They take a leaf.
20:11 Do you take a leaf?
20:12 I am feeling bad.
20:13 How do you take a leaf?
20:15 I am telling you.
20:16 Keep it inside.
20:17 Don't do it.
20:18 If you don't like a leaf,
20:19 then what should we call it?
20:21 Take it.
20:21 Take it to your mother.
20:22 She is still like this.
20:23 I don't know where she is.
20:25 (Laughs)
20:26 He doesn't give it to his mother.
20:27 Who gives it to his mother?
20:28 (Laughs)
20:29 Aunty, when you used to come earlier,
20:30 your stick used to be one,
20:32 now it has become two.
20:32 What is the reason for this?
20:33 My son has spoiled my hair.
20:35 (Laughs)
20:36 Aunty, I am thinking
20:37 when will you get to see the happiness of your grandchildren?
20:40 I am telling you, they are busy with their work.
20:42 Wherever they go, they eat at the next door.
20:44 They say, what do the boys eat?
20:46 I am telling the truth.
20:47 I am not lying.
20:48 I eat this every day.
20:49 Uncle, nowadays,
20:50 children find a marriage proposal for themselves.
20:53 Look, children.
20:54 Zeeshan has brought you here.
20:56 (Laughs)
20:58 Look, children, those who are educated,
20:59 those who know how to do it,
21:01 how will they give it to their daughter?
21:03 How will they give it to their son-in-law?
21:05 How will they give it to their son-in-law?
21:06 No, then find a place
21:07 where they also eat grass.
21:09 Sister, now you have done it.
21:10 Where will I find it?
21:11 (Laughs)
21:14 Don't you feel a little ashamed?
21:15 Don't be ashamed.
21:16 It's a private matter.
21:17 I don't feel ashamed.
21:18 Mother is telling him.
21:19 Okay, tell me what you want to say.
21:20 Do you know, for the sake of raising you,
21:22 your mother used to drive you to the house.
21:25 (Laughs)
21:26 Don't you feel ashamed?
21:27 You are misbehaving with your mother's stick.
21:29 (Laughs)
21:31 You used to eat your father's shoes.
21:33 (Laughs)
21:34 And the stick that your mother used to use,
21:35 Yes.
21:36 She used to put it on all the children's feet at night.
21:38 Yes.
21:38 And at 3 in the morning,
21:39 she used to play a song and throw it in her room.
21:42 (Laughs)
21:43 And that's it.
21:44 Yes.
21:45 Okay, now you have become real.
21:46 (Laughs)
21:48 Who is afraid of you?
21:49 How do you get scared?
21:50 Sir, I am not afraid.
21:52 Beware.
21:53 He is so scared that he is getting a cold.
21:55 (Laughs)
21:56 Tell me, what is the method of getting scared?
21:59 Okay, imagine that you are in a party.
22:02 Okay.
22:03 Yes.
22:04 The party has money for the mac and cheese.
22:05 Yes.
22:06 And I will go and I will go.
22:08 Hey, leave it.
22:09 No, no, no, don't do it.
22:11 Don't do it.
22:11 Not yet.
22:12 Not yet.
22:12 Okay, you don't worry.
22:13 I have a solution for this.
22:15 Yes.
22:15 I will call the police here.
22:17 Yes, do it.
22:18 I will call the police.
22:20 I will make him eat all the mac and cheese.
22:22 I will go to the priest and leave him.
22:25 Uncle, police will beat you.
22:27 (Laughs)
22:28 Look at him.
22:29 He has become a teenager with me.
22:31 Yes.
22:32 He has become a teenager.
22:33 You didn't teach him anything in 70 years.
22:35 (Laughs)
22:36 There must be some other way.
22:38 Hey, be shy.
22:40 I said, be shy.
22:41 (Laughs)
22:42 Mother is calling him.
22:43 Okay, her.
22:44 Hey, be shy.
22:45 For raising you, your mother was a slave for three years.
22:49 (Laughs)
22:50 Me?
22:51 Yes.
22:51 (Laughs)
22:52 I will not raise you again.
22:53 (Laughs)
22:54 Hey, be shy.
22:55 For 12 years, your mother was a slave.
22:58 What?
22:59 What was this?
23:00 Sir, you have to wear a belt below.
23:02 So that the one who wears it, never gets hurt.
23:04 (Laughs)
23:06 (Applause)
23:07 Is he the eldest or the youngest?
23:09 I don't know.
23:11 When did you come?
23:12 (Laughs)
23:13 He has just got new melons.
23:15 (Laughs)
23:16 Do you want to eat?
23:17 Do you want to eat?
23:18 (Laughs)
23:19 Listen to me.
23:20 Yes.
23:20 Call the police.
23:21 Call on 151.
23:23 Okay, tell me the number.
23:25 I will tell you.
23:26 Take it from 171.
23:28 (Laughs)
23:29 Is your poverty a crime?
23:30 I am eating because of poverty.
23:32 People are getting robbed in poverty.
23:34 Thank God.
23:35 God gives two meals to everyone.
23:37 It's not a big deal.
23:38 Oh, for God's sake.
23:39 People take it on their own.
23:41 How do you know?
23:42 Are you a royal boy?
23:43 They take it on their own.
23:44 Mr. Arun, if he is taking the belt,
23:46 he will not be alone.
23:47 He will have a gang with him.
23:48 There will be a gang, sir.
23:49 There will be a gang.
23:50 All the boys will come.
23:51 Believe me.
23:52 I will leave in sadness.
23:54 Do it.
23:54 We will play carrom for 1.5 hours.
23:56 (Laughs)
23:57 Some of them are my partners.
23:59 Some are my rivals.
24:00 I don't wear queen's clothes.
24:01 (Laughs)
24:03 Which is your area?
24:04 Where do you go to rob?
24:06 Tell him.
24:07 Have you seen Bhattachowk?
24:08 Yes.
24:08 God forgive me.
24:09 It's near the main signal.
24:11 Oh.
24:13 Mr. Arun, it's so crowded there.
24:16 People are not complaining out of fear.
24:19 They say that they will reach.
24:20 They will reach to the minister.
24:21 Now she has reached.
24:22 She is on national TV.
24:24 Her face is also there.
24:25 What is there to complain?
24:26 I don't understand.
24:28 You tell him.
24:29 Why are you asking me to tell?
24:32 Tell me one thing.
24:33 What do you want to say?
24:34 Suppose I am a shopkeeper.
24:35 What do you do?
24:36 Sir, you will lose your confidence.
24:39 You will go.
24:40 (Gasps)
24:43 What is this?
24:43 God will give you whatever you want.
24:46 Thank you.
24:47 What if he doesn't give?
24:48 God will give.
24:50 (Laughs)
24:54 Oh, God.
24:55 If you want to do this,
24:57 don't take me with you.
24:59 (Laughs)
25:02 Mr. Gala, your physique is so good.
25:04 Yes.
25:05 You are so beautiful.
25:06 You look like a woodcutter.
25:08 You look like a woodcutter.
25:09 Mr. Agha, gift him your car.
25:11 Which one?
25:12 Oh, God.
25:14 I will gift you a car.
25:16 I am sure that you will park it outside.
25:18 It's better if you park it inside.
25:19 (Laughs)
25:20 Mr. Gala, you can't park a car in the college.
25:23 (Laughs)
25:24 If you want to live with your mother,
25:26 don't take a plastic bag.
25:28 Whatever you say.
25:29 He is thinking of something.
25:30 (Laughs)
25:34 He is thinking of something.
25:36 He will burn the floor.
25:38 (Laughs)
25:39 I told him to keep it somewhere.
25:42 He will do it.
25:43 It's not a good thing to ask for it.
25:45 It's a bad thing.
25:46 You have to work hard.
25:47 You come to Lahore.
25:49 There are so many beggars.
25:50 I have 40 beggars.
25:52 They are working. Don't go with them.
25:53 (Laughs)
25:55 Oh, damn.
25:56 What happened?
25:56 It's my prime business offer.
25:58 (Laughs)
26:02 Viewers, there is a small break.
26:03 You can meet us after the break.
26:05 When you weigh 2.5 kg, you don't get up.
26:08 You get up.
26:08 Carry on.
26:10 Show me your 2.5 kg hand.
26:12 Hand?
26:12 (Laughs)
26:14 This is a 2.5 kg hand.
26:15 The one who is weak, he is holding it with one finger.
26:17 (Laughs)
26:19 His grandfather passed away.
26:20 He is making an announcement in the mosque.
26:21 He says, "My grandfather passed away last night."
26:24 "It's his 9th funeral."
26:25 "So, like and share his funeral."
26:27 (Laughs)
26:29 (Music)
26:32 Welcome back, viewers.
26:33 Yes, Irza.
26:34 We had a lot of fun at Iftari today.
26:36 Wow.
26:38 He said, "Irza, you were out again."
26:40 (Laughs)
26:42 Our audience has a lot to say.
26:44 Let's go to them.
26:45 Yes.
26:45 Peace be upon you.
26:46 Peace be upon you.
26:47 First of all, I would like to thank you.
26:49 And your team.
26:51 Because they are making a lot of efforts to make us laugh.
26:54 Thank you.
26:55 My name is Asad Ali and I am doing a B.Sc. English Literature.
26:57 From University of Punjab, Lahore.
26:59 Wow.
26:59 And I am from Chiniot.
27:00 So, I would like to mimic some politicians and Indian actors.
27:06 Wow.
27:06 Please do.
27:07 But, brother, we also feel like we should do it.
27:09 We should do it.
27:11 (Laughs)
27:12 First of all, he would like to thank you all.
27:15 Thank you.
27:16 You all work very hard to make him laugh.
27:18 And then he said, "I am a student."
27:21 You should have told us in Urdu and Punjabi.
27:23 Tell us the reason.
27:24 He would have been in English.
27:26 Sir, he doesn't know.
27:27 He would have been in English and his hairstyle is like a cycle champion.
27:30 (Laughs)
27:34 Translate this and tell us in English.
27:37 He thanked us. I think he knows.
27:39 (Laughs)
27:40 Sir, he doesn't know Punjabi and Urdu.
27:41 He is from Chiniot.
27:43 I understood it till the first fall.
27:45 (Laughs)
27:46 Okay, brother, we would like to thank you first.
27:51 Amitabh Bachchan.
27:52 Sir, we are big fans of yours.
27:56 May God bless you with a happy couple.
27:58 Look, they look like a rabbit with a stick.
28:02 Wow.
28:03 (Laughs)
28:05 I think Amitabh Bachchan is diabetic.
28:07 (Laughs)
28:08 Amitabh Bachchan is a drunkard.
28:11 (Laughs)
28:12 And Amitabh Bachchan is a man who has done something.
28:15 (Laughs)
28:17 Amitabh Bachchan is a man who has done something.
28:19 (Laughs)
28:21 You are straightening your hand even while bowing.
28:24 I think he is a big addict.
28:25 (Laughs)
28:26 Look, he has applied so much of cream on his face.
28:28 (Laughs)
28:32 Chada, explain to him.
28:35 These toys are sold a lot in the market.
28:37 Sunil Shetty.
28:39 Not Sunil Shetty.
28:40 I am not Sunil Shetty, I am Sunny Deol.
28:42 (Laughs)
28:44 If you forget, you don't get up when you have to carry 2.5 kgs of food.
28:48 Carry on, Shetty.
28:50 Show me the hand of 2.5 kgs.
28:52 Hand?
28:53 (Laughs)
28:54 He has touched his hand and his hand is trembling.
28:56 (Laughs)
28:57 This is a 2.5 kgs hand.
28:59 The weaker one is holding it with one finger.
29:01 (Laughs)
29:03 His grandfather has passed away and he is making an announcement in the mosque.
29:05 He says, "My grandfather has passed away last night."
29:08 "He is the 9th funeral."
29:09 "So like and share the funeral."
29:11 (Laughs)
29:13 His grandfather has passed away too.
29:15 He says, "Son, go and bury him."
29:17 He goes to bury him and he says, "I will take 1500 rupees for the grave."
29:19 He says, "Take 750 and throw the money out."
29:21 (Laughs)
29:23 His grandfather has also passed away.
29:25 His grandfather is dying and he says, "My grandson."
29:27 "I have no will. I don't want to die."
29:30 "I have buried my grandfather."
29:31 (Laughs)
29:33 His grandfather has passed away and he says, "Son, I am walking empty handed."
29:36 He has made him wear torn clothes.
29:37 (Laughs)
29:39 God has given you 4 paise, Hilal.
29:40 You have become very good.
29:41 If your grandfather dies, you give 2 lakhs to the deceased
29:43 and you will get the funeral done.
29:44 (Laughs)
29:46 Was there a protest here?
29:48 Why?
29:48 How dirty are these tires?
29:50 (Laughs)
29:52 (Applause)
29:55 The boy is ready.
29:57 (Cheers)
30:00 Amazing.
30:01 The interesting thing is that he is struggling.
30:04 But he knows what limit he is in and how to struggle.
30:09 So, he is very good.
30:10 Very good.
30:11 (Applause)
30:12 Agha Majumdar never got a chance to walk.
30:14 Why?
30:15 He is wearing a helmet in the middle of the traffic.
30:17 (Laughs)
30:18 Mr. Maheshwari.
30:19 Mathur, the day I see a white butterfly,
30:25 I see hundreds of black dogs in my blood.
30:28 (Laughs)
30:30 I drink black dog that day.
30:32 (Laughs)
30:33 Did you give this to Maheshwari or did you give it to him?
30:35 (Laughs)
30:37 Are these your bones?
30:38 (Laughs)
30:40 Very good.
30:41 (Applause)
30:44 Yes.
30:45 Greetings.
30:46 Greetings.
30:47 My first question is that
30:49 we call everyone by their childhood names.
30:55 So, my question to Adeem Vicky is that
30:58 what did you call him in your childhood?
31:01 Pabu.
31:02 Pabu.
31:03 Come here.
31:04 No, he used to call me Pabu.
31:06 (Laughs)
31:08 He used to call me Pabu in love.
31:09 He used to call me Abbu in love.
31:11 (Laughs)
31:13 He was called dustbin for three months.
31:15 (Laughs)
31:16 Then he started calling me Kuda.
31:18 (Laughs)
31:19 He started calling me Rudi when I cut my legs.
31:21 (Laughs)
31:22 Then he started calling me Chhapad.
31:24 (Laughs)
31:25 He wrote his final exam with a dirty name.
31:28 (Laughs)
31:29 He used to call his mother and younger siblings by their names.
31:32 He used to say, "Aren't they my vampires?"
31:33 (Laughs)
31:34 He used to give all the cream to his brother
31:37 and he used to spit it out.
31:38 (Laughs)
31:39 I think he must be called Bullet.
31:42 (Laughs)
31:43 Not just Bullet, Bulletproof.
31:45 (Laughs)
31:46 Salim is weak.
31:47 He is very tired of his brother.
31:49 He is sitting like a banana.
31:50 (Laughs)
31:52 (Applause)
31:55 Yes.
31:56 Greetings.
31:56 Greetings.
31:57 My name is Sikandar. I am from Okara.
31:58 I would like to say a poem for Sir Haroon.
32:01 He has a labia from Okara.
32:02 Wow.
32:03 Wow.
32:04 Amazing.
32:05 (Applause)
32:06 We meet every day, every night, all people are familiar.
32:09 Aha.
32:10 We meet every day, every night, all people are familiar.
32:13 I had a desire to meet you.
32:16 Wow.
32:17 (Applause)
32:20 Thank you, Sir. Thank you very much.
32:22 Thank you very much.
32:23 Yes.
32:23 Greetings.
32:24 Greetings.
32:25 I hope you all are fine.
32:26 Thank you.
32:27 Actually, my question is that
32:29 all the comedians, female actresses,
32:32 all the people sitting here,
32:34 my question to you is that being an artist,
32:36 it is very difficult for you to work in your daily routine.
32:39 Exactly.
32:39 Especially, like comedians,
32:41 playing with kids is not a cup of tea.
32:44 So, when you don't get that appreciation
32:47 which you deserve,
32:48 how do you feel?
32:50 I want to ask this.
32:51 I think we get that appreciation.
32:54 No, that question is from Ayub Mirza.
32:55 (Laughs)
32:57 We don't know if our sentence will be used or not.
33:00 We all do filibity.
33:02 Exactly.
33:03 Not filibity, filibity.
33:04 That's what you do.
33:05 (Laughs)
33:07 So, the show you watch is 36 minutes long.
33:11 But we do a lot of comedy.
33:13 They throw a lot of things in it.
33:15 Someone said a beautiful thing.
33:17 That in close-up, life is very serious.
33:22 Wow.
33:23 And in long shot, life is comedy.
33:25 Wow.
33:26 And I think that life is difficult at normal pace.
33:30 Life is comedy in slow motion.
33:33 If you note, for example,
33:35 that you are going to a building
33:39 and the gardener stops you.
33:40 He asks, "Where are you going?"
33:43 I say, "I'm going inside."
33:45 So, you know you're going inside.
33:47 He knows you're going inside.
33:48 And he asks, "Where are you going?"
33:50 If you slow it down,
33:52 piece by piece,
33:54 look around you,
33:56 look around you, what's happening,
33:58 you would realize that we are mostly
34:01 doing comedy in life.
34:04 And remember one thing.
34:06 The day you get a good news,
34:09 this is for all of you,
34:10 if you get a good news that after two weeks,
34:13 you will be given 10 crores.
34:16 Suddenly, you get a good news.
34:18 You get messages on WhatsApp
34:21 that you have won a car.
34:22 Think that it's true.
34:24 You have won a car worth 1 crore.
34:26 You know that you will get a car in two weeks.
34:29 You will be so happy in your house.
34:32 The house is the same.
34:33 The breakfast is the same.
34:35 The lunch is the same.
34:36 Your family is the same.
34:38 The clothes are the same. Everything is the same.
34:40 But everything looks so good.
34:42 Even the evening looks good.
34:43 Even the day looks good.
34:44 Why?
34:45 Because you have opened the blinds of your mind.
34:49 And you have given permission to your heart
34:51 to be happy.
34:52 Enjoy the happiness of life.
34:55 You have given permission to it.
34:57 You don't give permission in normal days.
34:59 Because you don't expect anything good.
35:02 The only difference is
35:03 that you expect that what happened was good.
35:06 And it will be good.
35:08 Be happy.
35:09 You will get comedy in your life.
35:11 Wow!
35:12 Sir, Goga has also gone to a big hotel.
35:16 Okay.
35:17 The watchman asked him where are you going.
35:18 He said, "My dog is inside."
35:20 Oh, man!
35:21 Once Goga also bit the collar.
35:23 Okay.
35:24 He said, "Shut up."
35:25 Hey!
35:26 Greetings.
35:30 Greetings.
35:31 My name is Sukhawat.
35:32 And my question is to Mr. Haroon.
35:33 Yes, sir.
35:34 Mr. Haroon, I like your style of speaking.
35:36 Tell me, did you always speak like this
35:38 or did you adopt this style after becoming an anchor?
35:40 No, I didn't speak like this since long.
35:42 I also spoke like a child.
35:44 Like small children do in their childhood.
35:45 I learned slowly and learned from people.
35:48 I didn't invent it myself or I didn't come here.
35:50 I listened to people.
35:52 Zia Mohiuddin, Anwar Maqsood
35:54 and many more people.
35:55 I saw them and learned from them.
35:57 And when you learn and practice
36:00 there comes a time when it becomes your natural style.
36:03 But you can't make the texture of your voice.
36:05 That's God's gift.
36:06 The timbre of the voice is God's gift.
36:09 Thank you.
36:10 Yes, brother.
36:14 Greetings.
36:15 Greetings.
36:16 First of all, my name is Ahsan Akbar.
36:18 First of all, your name is Ahsan Akbar.
36:20 And secondly, what is your name?
36:21 Second of all, I am from University of Lahore.
36:24 Yes, of course.
36:25 Sir, I am a big fan of all of you.
36:28 Thank you.
36:28 Because in today's times, everyone has some problem.
36:32 Like we are students and we are going to get married.
36:34 We are worried about that.
36:35 Everyone is worried.
36:37 So we get happy watching this show.
36:39 Wow.
36:40 Sir, I met Agha Maaj and told him about my uncle.
36:43 He doesn't sleep until he watches the show.
36:45 Wow.
36:46 Wow.
36:50 Like Mridul sir.
36:51 Yes.
36:52 He lost money.
36:52 He lost the match again by getting the chalkis.
36:54 And he is also saying that he has been out before.
36:58 He is unlucky.
37:01 He brought water from the well last time.
37:03 Very good. Thank you very much.
37:06 And I pray for all of you.
37:08 It is your love that we are doing this show.
37:10 Thank you very much.
37:11 Sir, secondly, I wanted to talk about your talent hunt.
37:15 So like it.
37:16 Sir, I haven't received any update yet.
37:18 We have many updates.
37:19 Did you give your number here?
37:21 Sir, I think I gave my number.
37:23 You didn't give your number.
37:24 You are a student here.
37:26 Yes.
37:27 Take his number.
37:28 What did you say your name is?
37:29 Sir, Ahsan Akbar from University.
37:31 Take Ahsan Akbar's number and please block him.
37:33 Okay?
37:34 I mean, sorry.
37:36 Sorry, you have to talk to him.
37:37 Sir, actually, I talked to you last time.
37:39 Our society wants to join you as an audience.
37:43 And we will do different monologues here.
37:46 Sir, you can come here whenever you want.
37:49 Okay.
37:49 It is your show.
37:51 Wow.
37:52 Thank you, sir.
37:53 How many houses are there in your society?
37:57 That is not a society.
37:59 Drama society.
38:00 Why? Do you want to do a white house?
38:02 Mr. Mirza!
38:05 Very good.
38:06 Very good.
38:08 I think we can use a dead body in our house.
38:10 We can use a dead body in our house.
38:13 We can make a mess.
38:14 Dead body on the streets.
38:16 Yes.
38:17 Greetings.
38:18 Greetings.
38:18 My name is Shiza Rizwan.
38:20 I have been on the show before.
38:21 Yes, of course.
38:22 And...
38:23 You know Taekwondo?
38:25 No, I am a freestyle fighter.
38:27 It is the most dangerous game.
38:28 You told me...
38:29 My son is so nice.
38:31 You told me that your parents also know fighting.
38:37 Yes.
38:38 I have brought my parents along.
38:40 I am sitting behind.
38:41 Yes, sir.
38:42 You were talking so much.
38:44 You were saying, "She is my niece."
38:47 Last time, I was asked how to defend if a kid attacks.
38:54 How to defend if a big kid attacks.
38:56 Today, I have brought my parents along.
38:58 Give the mic to our sister.
39:01 Greetings.
39:02 Greetings.
39:03 Your entire family knows how to fight.
39:06 Yes, of course.
39:07 What style?
39:08 I do karate wrestling.
39:12 That is why they are not breathing properly.
39:15 I am looking at him.
39:17 He is sitting like this.
39:18 Why are you protecting your knees?
39:19 He is practicing.
39:20 He is practicing.
39:22 The one who is sitting in the front...
39:25 Yes.
39:26 He doesn't even breathe.
39:27 He is like a person who has come to the court.
39:29 When did you learn?
39:33 Did you learn fighting or did you learn it before?
39:35 After I got married, I learnt it from my husband.
39:39 Then you could do it.
39:40 Yes, you understood that you have to learn.
39:42 Yes.
39:43 No, you can't be straight like this.
39:45 He taught me.
39:48 Very good.
39:49 You did a very good job.
39:50 I want our young generation, especially the girls,
39:55 all of them should know this.
39:56 They should have confidence and self-confidence.
40:00 He did a very good job.
40:02 He may have hit his head with a bat, but he did a good job.
40:05 He did a very good job.
40:06 This is very commendable.
40:09 Give the mic to him.
40:11 Now that he has learned so much, he is giving prescriptions to the doctor.
40:16 The doctor said that it's not too much.
40:19 He is a fool.
40:21 Okay.
40:22 He is a fool.
40:24 He is telling me that Amaratbhai taught him.
40:27 Greetings.
40:32 Greetings.
40:33 Sir, where did you learn this and what is your profession?
40:36 Actually, I have been in this field for 46 years.
40:38 I started it in Islamabad.
40:40 What is your name, sir?
40:41 My name is Dr. Saroj Vanali.
40:43 I have done my PhD in martial arts.
40:45 Oh!
40:46 Wow!
40:48 Very good.
40:49 And to give you the knowledge, he is making world Guinness records.
40:53 He is my student.
40:55 Wow!
40:56 Very good.
40:57 Very good.
40:58 He is like Jackie Chan's movie.
41:00 He does this first.
41:02 So, what is the situation at home?
41:06 When your wife brings tea, you say, "Tea."
41:08 (Laughter)
41:10 So, you never said, "It's not good. Take it away."
41:13 (Laughter)
41:15 Actually, martial arts is only for defence, not for attack.
41:18 Oh!
41:19 It is only for defence.
41:20 For self-defence.
41:21 Yes, for self-defence, not for attack.
41:23 You have kept the defense so smooth.
41:26 (Laughter)
41:28 Amaratbhai was going to make a chutney of so much coriander.
41:31 He presented it to the minister.
41:33 (Laughter)
41:35 (Applause)
41:37 So, viewers, this was today's show.
41:39 We will meet you in the next show.
41:41 Take care.
41:42 Goodbye.
41:43 [MUSIC PLAYING]