305.On The Buses.Busmans Perks.
Olive wants to re-decorate her and Arthur's bedroom, so, to do it on the cheap, Stan gets two tins of paint from the depot. They are the bus colours - red and yellow, which Arthur mixes to make green. Unfortunately he omits to add hardeners so that the paint is very, very, very, very, very slow-drying and Olive gets hand prints everywhere.
Transcript
00:00I'm not paying for that, mate.
00:27What do you mean?
00:28Well, it wants to, in love. It hasn't been done since Arthur and I have got married.
00:3230 quid? Why only do it himself?
00:35Because I can't manage on my own. I'll be waiting for you to give me a hand, haven't I?
00:39That's what's wrong with our marriage. You'll always find an excuse not to do anything.
00:43Yeah, well, there are some things I can't help him to do.
00:46Something's got to be done. That bedroom's unhygienic.
00:49Oh, blimey, Mum, it's not all that bad.
00:51Yes, it is.
00:53It hasn't been done for nine years.
00:55Yeah, it was patched up for our wedding.
00:57Everything was patched up for our wedding.
01:00No, it wasn't. You didn't have your operation until two years later.
01:05Will you give over about my operation?
01:08Look, mate, let's get back to the bedroom. It's quite disgusting.
01:11If you saw it in broad daylight, you'd have a shock.
01:13I did. I went in your bedroom yesterday and she was prancing around in her roll-ons.
01:19Mum, did you all prance around in my roll-on?
01:21Certainly not. When you've got them on, you can hardly move.
01:25Mum, did you hear what he said to me?
01:27Do you think he should speak to me like that?
01:29Never interfere between husband and wife. It can upset a very happy marriage.
01:33Not much danger of that.
01:35Right, that's my lot. I'm off.
01:37No, you don't. You don't go slipping away. You're coming upstairs.
01:40Have a look at that room and see what can be done.
01:42For God's sake, Mum, come on, then. I've got to get to the demo.
01:45Let's go up and see what needs doing.
01:47I'll keep moving.
01:56Well, well, not much wrong with this, is there?
02:01What?
02:02Well, it'd look a lot better if she'd made the bed.
02:05Look, mate, the whole of this room is disintegrating.
02:08I mean, look, look at that.
02:11Well, it's only a bit damp.
02:13Damp?
02:15Hey, you like mushrooms, don't you?
02:17Yeah.
02:18Help yourself. There are plenty coming out soon.
02:20Don't be funny.
02:21Look, mate, this place isn't fit for human habitation.
02:24Oh, for God's sake, stop moaning.
02:26Look, I'll pay my whack in this house, mate.
02:28I am entitled to decent accommodation.
02:30You ought to think yourself lucky, mate, I tell you that.
02:32If I advertised this room down at the depot,
02:34next week I'd have ten fellows sleeping in here.
02:36Yes, isn't it terrible?
02:38Do you know what, Mum?
02:39There's one bloke down in our place.
02:40He's in the roof, no bigger than this, and he's got six kids.
02:44Ooh, eight in one room?
02:46Well, not exactly. He's got a couple of lodgers up on top of the wardrobe.
02:49Do you mind not being so facetious?
02:53Are you going to give me an hand with this, or do I bring the builders in?
02:56You give him a hand, love.
02:57Oh, all right, all right, all right.
02:59Well, we'll knock it off one morning.
03:01What a lot of rot you do talk.
03:03One morning? Undercoat, two finishes under woodwork,
03:07that's one morning, isn't it?
03:08That's before we start to paint papers.
03:11Papering?
03:12You must be out of your tiny mind, mate,
03:14not getting papered before you paint it.
03:16No, I can get the stuff down at our depot
03:18that goes rock hard in two hours.
03:20And I can get it cheap, too.
03:22Oh, lovely.
03:23Oh, Mum, what colour shall we have?
03:25Oh, I think we want a nice pastel shade,
03:27a nice pale pink, or a lovely mauve.
03:30Look, it's got to be green or yellow.
03:33Oh?
03:36That's the colour they paint our buses.
03:38Oh.
03:39I thought if I had it done, I'd like it red.
03:42Well, I'll give me notice then, if you like,
03:44and go and work for the London Transport.
03:46I think red's a nice colour for a bedroom.
03:48It makes a woman look sexy.
03:51Does it?
03:53Don't you remember that red baby doll I bought, Arthur?
03:56How exciting I looked in it.
03:58Oh, I'm afraid I must be colour-blind.
04:00Here, you say you'll get that paint cheap?
04:02Yeah, of course.
04:03Right, well, I've been thinking,
04:05it seems to me yellow and green are excellent colours
04:07for a bedroom, most tasteful.
04:08Right, that's settled, then.
04:09See you at tea time.
04:10Right, old lad.
04:11With the paint.
04:12With the paint.
04:13And a few brushes.
04:14All right.
04:21You want me to pay for it?
04:23Pay for it?
04:24Yeah.
04:25Here, you reckon I'll let me have it cheap, the paint?
04:27Of course not, you're not going to pay for it.
04:29What do you think I was going to do?
04:31Don't be daft, mate.
04:32Look, all you've got to do,
04:33buy Nobby a couple of pints of bitter,
04:35he'll give you two gallons of eyegloss for nothing.
04:38A couple of pints of bitter for two gallons of paint?
04:40Yeah, brushes, wood, upholstery, anything you like.
04:43They'll all have it.
04:44Blimey, no wonder they count the buses every night.
04:47A couple of pints of bitter for two gallons of paint?
04:49Listen, mate, it's busman's perks.
04:51If the governor can do it, we can do it.
04:53Oh, come off it, Jack.
04:55The governor don't pinch paint.
04:56Oh, yeah?
04:57Why do you think they've changed the lettering on the buses
04:59to metallic bronze?
05:00So that Nobby here can spray his jag.
05:03Yeah, but...
05:04Yeah, but...
05:05Blimey, yeah, but...
05:06Just touch it up here and there.
05:08Touch it up, they said.
05:0927 coats, isn't that right, Nobby?
05:1128, but who's counting?
05:13Yeah.
05:14I'll tell you another thing,
05:15he fills up his tank here and all.
05:16Oh, come on, now, you know as well as I do
05:18how buses run on diesel or not petrol.
05:20Yeah, he's not that daft.
05:21This happens to be the only jag fitted with a diesel.
05:24Now, I'm telling you, mate, you can have what you like.
05:27Now, they're all at it.
05:28Here, Nobby, show us your job card, will you?
05:30Here you are.
05:31Here you are, have a butcher's.
05:32Er, complete electrical overhaul
05:34on checkline bus number 74682,
05:37five hours allowed.
05:38Yeah.
05:39So what, so what?
05:40Well, he spent ten minutes on the bus fixing the ashtray
05:42and four hours fifty on the jag fixing the cigar lighter.
05:45And you all wanted about two gallons of paint.
05:47Well, you can have what you can take,
05:50so long as the Gestapo don't catch you.
05:52Gestapo.
05:53Gestapo.
05:54Gestapo.
05:56What are you two doing round here then?
05:58Strictly no admittance, you know it, eh?
06:00I was just pointing out to Brother Stan here,
06:02the shop steward,
06:03how the company's profits are being squandered
06:05on the Governor's jag.
06:06Isn't that right, Nobby?
06:07Well, er...
06:08Now, don't you start all Bolsheviks round here, mate.
06:11You know Mr Adams, as General Manager,
06:13is entitled to use that car
06:15as and when he thinks fit on the company business.
06:17Yeah, all right, all right.
06:18Yes, all right, all right.
06:19Edger, Edger, here comes your Adams secretary now.
06:21Yeah.
06:22Another of the boss's perks,
06:23also gets service as and when required.
06:25Good morning, Mr Blake.
06:26Good morning, Miss Smith.
06:28Ooh.
06:29I wouldn't mind banging her in the putt
06:31and running over her chassis.
06:33No, no, no, no, no.
06:35Mr Adams won't be wanting the car till late tonight.
06:38He'll be working overtime.
06:40Yeah, I'll bet he will.
06:42I've prayed you to her.
06:44We finished at seven o'clock, Miss.
06:45Oh, good.
06:47Here you are.
06:48Ooh, scotch.
06:49Oh, good God.
06:51Poor, lecherous layabout.
06:54Hey, Stan,
06:55I reckon that's what they call
06:56one of the boss's fringe benefits, eh?
07:00Well, don't look now, mate,
07:01but I can see her fringe.
07:08She happens to work with Mr Adams,
07:09and he treats her in exactly the same way
07:11as you do the clippings.
07:12Filthy beast.
07:15When I was in the army, mate,
07:16we had a medicine for blokes like you.
07:19You see out there, look?
07:20Yeah.
07:21It's a big bus, look.
07:22Yeah, a big bus.
07:23A big green double-decker.
07:24Yeah.
07:25Now I want you two to go out there
07:26and get in it
07:27and get out.
07:30Come on, then, we'd better get moving.
07:31Come here.
07:32Hang on, hang on, hang on.
07:33I want to see Knobby about the painting.
07:35That's right, mate.
07:36We're entitled to our perks.
07:37What the Governor can have, we can have.
07:39Mm.
07:40Well, if that's the case,
07:41the Governor can have the paint,
07:42and I'll have his secretary.
07:43Chose up on that, mate.
07:49Knobby,
07:50do you fancy a couple of pints of bitter?
08:03Well, where is he, then?
08:04He knows he's due out.
08:06Well, I think he had to go to the loo.
08:08Go to the loo?
08:09It's worse than the clippings.
08:10Well, is he curling his hair now, then?
08:13Look,
08:14I've got other buses to worry about
08:16besides yours, you know.
08:17When he comes along,
08:18you both get in and get out.
08:19Oi, come on, Chalky,
08:20get in out of it.
08:22All right, here he is now.
08:27Oi, oi.
08:28What?
08:29What are you doing?
08:30Oh, er, yeah,
08:31I was, er,
08:32just giving Knobby
08:33a hand with the, er, fire buckets.
08:35A hand with the fire buckets?
08:36Yeah.
08:38You're paid to drive buses, mate,
08:40not make sand pies.
08:42Get that cab out of it, go on.
08:43Yeah.
08:44No, it's a phone now.
08:45All right, all right.
08:48Thanks.
08:49Where's the paint?
08:50Don't be daft.
08:51Don't be daft, mate.
08:52I'm not an idiot, am I?
08:56Oh, very clever.
08:58Clever, clever.
08:59Right, get him in, mate.
09:00Yeah, that's it.
09:01Here.
09:02Tell us that now.
09:03Give it to the yellow, mate.
09:05Here's the hardener.
09:06You mix that up with the paint,
09:07it makes it dry quickly.
09:08Yeah, the hardener, hardener, right.
09:09Here's the bottle of special tinners.
09:11Now, go very careful with that.
09:12Yeah, all right.
09:13And remember what I told you,
09:14don't sniff it,
09:15because it gives off dangerous fumes.
09:16Now, keep that bag away from me.
09:17Yeah, all right.
09:18See you at the boozer.
09:19Right over there, Knobby.
09:20Yeah, right.
09:23You idiot, open the door.
09:25Oh, you smashed that bottle up.
09:29It's stuffed all over the cab.
09:30It's stuffed all over the cab.
09:33Knobby, your laugh stinks,
09:34you knew he was right.
09:36Take a deep breath,
09:37dive around the corner,
09:38we'll clean up the air.
09:39Yeah, all right, one more minute,
09:40let's get a breather.
09:41All right, here we go.
09:47I can't stand it,
09:48I can't stand it,
09:49I've got to get out.
09:50What's it?
09:51It's a gestalt bag,
09:52come on, get back here.
09:54It's an emergency,
09:55hang about.
09:57Hang about, mate, don't go.
10:01There's been a water main burst
10:03in a high street,
10:04there's a diversion,
10:05I've got it here.
10:06Yeah, all right, I'll watch it,
10:07but I've got to go.
10:08I've got it here, son,
10:09wait, wait, there you are.
10:11There you are.
10:12Turn left at Elvis Road.
10:17You all right, mate?
10:19He's got hay fever.
10:20Hay fever, what,
10:21in the middle of winter?
10:23Well, it's the fumes
10:24in the engine of the cab.
10:26Fumes in the cab?
10:27Oh, no, not that bad,
10:28not that bad, it's all right.
10:30But I must go, I must go.
10:31You must,
10:32and it's marvellous, eh?
10:35He's always late out
10:36and the very first time
10:37I want to hold him up
10:38and have a word with him
10:39he wants to dash out
10:40like a lunatic.
10:41Now, you just hold on a minute, mate.
10:43I'll give it a signal
10:44when he's off, right,
10:45put down here.
10:46Turn left at Elvis Road
10:47out the high street.
10:49Oh!
10:53Turn right at the rock
10:54and I'll turn about.
10:56When you get to the ball place,
10:57turn left.
10:58Yeah, it's all right,
10:59I've got it, I've got it.
11:01I know it, I know it, I know it.
11:05Are you all right, mate?
11:06Yeah, yeah, I'll be all right.
11:07All right?
11:08He's crying his eyes out,
11:09look at him.
11:12You ain't, er,
11:13you ain't got no trouble at home,
11:14have you, boy?
11:16Tears coming down
11:17his little face, look.
11:18Yeah, well, that's, er,
11:19that's because he's
11:20breaking his heart
11:21because he's got to leave you.
11:24Yeah, either that
11:25or he's crying
11:26because he's seen you.
11:29Twit.
11:30There you are.
11:31There you are.
11:33Open the door, open the door.
11:35Oh!
11:36I can't take any more.
11:38Oh!
11:39God!
11:41What's the matter?
11:43Have the fumes gone to your skin?
11:44What?
11:45Oh, no, no,
11:46what's that on my back?
11:47What's that?
11:49What's this, then?
11:53Ah, that's what it is, yeah.
11:55Oh, by the way,
11:56that's the brush Nobby gave you.
11:57Must have got round the back of you.
11:58Well, it's a good
11:59and super quality.
12:00Guaranteed not
12:01to lose its bristles.
12:02Oh, that's a life of a start.
12:05Well, there you are.
12:07That's it.
12:10That's the lot.
12:11Come out of it, come out of it,
12:12come out of it.
12:13I think we've done
12:14a very good job there, Stan.
12:15Who's we?
12:16I didn't see much
12:17sweat on you, mate.
12:18Well, I mixed the paint,
12:19didn't I?
12:20Big deal.
12:21Here you are, loves,
12:22I've brought you
12:23another cup of tea.
12:24Lovely, Mum, lovely.
12:25We've finished it, Mum.
12:26What do you think of it, then, eh?
12:27Well, it looks very nice.
12:28Yeah?
12:29Yeah.
12:30I put two coats of paint
12:31on everything.
12:32Including me.
12:34Well, you've done very well.
12:35It's only one o'clock.
12:36Yeah.
12:37Do you know what?
12:38I nearly used up
12:39two gallons of paint.
12:40You know what?
12:41You drank up
12:42three gallons of tea.
12:43Oh, Olive, look.
12:45They've even painted
12:46the chest of drawers.
12:50Yeah, I did that.
12:51He had to.
12:52He spilled a tin of paint on it.
12:54And I think it's very nice.
12:56Don't you touch it.
12:57It's still wet.
12:58Here.
12:59Well, it's dry,
13:00all glossy like that.
13:01No, dry, all fluffy.
13:02He went and leant against it
13:03before he'd finished.
13:05It won't show
13:06when it's dried out.
13:07When will that be, love?
13:08In a couple of hours' time.
13:10That's that new paint
13:11I was telling you about, Mum,
13:12that I got down at the depot,
13:13you know.
13:14It dries rock hard
13:15in no time.
13:16Do you know what?
13:17You can chuck boiling water at it,
13:18bash it with an hammer,
13:19it even stands up
13:20to sand, grit,
13:21snow, rain,
13:22hot tar,
13:23even flying gravel.
13:24Oh, very useful.
13:27We have those things
13:28in our bedroom every night.
13:31Oh, Arthur!
13:32You've got a lot of paint
13:33on your head.
13:34Hey!
13:35Oh, blimey,
13:36I'll just shampoo it off.
13:38Oh, it's very hard
13:39to get paint off, eh?
13:41Whatever.
13:44You know what shampoo, mate?
13:45Get yourself
13:46a bit of sandpaper
13:47and rub it off.
13:48Make it shine up a little.
13:51Anyway.
13:53I've got to go.
13:54Mind the paint, mate.
13:55Mind the paint, love.
13:56All right.
13:57Now, Mum, listen.
13:58In a couple of hours' time,
13:59just a couple of hours' time,
14:00you can put all the furniture
14:01back where it came from.
14:02Ooh!
14:03Yeah.
14:04Now, remember,
14:05Olive, just think,
14:06you and Arthur
14:07can sleep in a nice
14:08brand-new bedroom.
14:09Oh, everything nice and fresh.
14:10Oh, just like
14:11a second honeymoon.
14:13Yeah, well, that'll take
14:14more than a couple
14:15of coats of paint.
14:16Now, get up
14:17and get yourself
14:18cleaned up.
14:19Come on, give me these
14:20shoes.
14:26Golly, mate,
14:27what a day, eh?
14:28Yeah.
14:29Painting all day,
14:30driving all night.
14:31I tell you what, mate,
14:32I'm beat.
14:33I'm going to have
14:34a glass of beer.
14:35Do you fancy one?
14:36Oh, well, it's twelve o'clock.
14:37I shouldn't stop.
14:38Still, if you're going to
14:39twist my arm...
14:40Get on there.
14:41All right.
14:42There he is.
14:43You won't like getting
14:44him up here.
14:45Stan!
14:46Come up here!
14:47Stan!
14:48Stan!
14:50Oh, blimey.
14:51I suppose it was
14:52a bit to see the bedroom
14:53now that the
14:54furnace is back in place.
14:55Come on!
14:56Well, you don't sound
14:57too happy to me.
14:58I think you'd better go up.
14:59Yeah, well,
15:00keep on with me.
15:01I won't be long yet.
15:02Yeah, right.
15:06You, er,
15:07want to see me, mate?
15:08Yes, do come in.
15:09I'd like to show you
15:10something, Stan.
15:11Have a look at the paint.
15:12Yeah, great,
15:13haven't it?
15:14What a lovely shine.
15:15Yeah, of course it is.
15:16Because it's still wet.
15:17You and your
15:18two-hour paint
15:20What are you talking about?
15:21It's supposed to
15:22dry like that.
15:23It's an hard
15:24gloss paint, mate.
15:25That's why it dries...
15:26Oh, blimey.
15:28I might have known
15:29nothing good could come
15:30out of your ruddy
15:31Bastepo, mate.
15:32Don't blame me, mate.
15:33I mean, after all,
15:34seven down,
15:35you mixed the paint,
15:36didn't you?
15:37Of course, I know
15:38what's happened.
15:39You didn't put enough
15:40hardener with it.
15:41Hardener?
15:42What hardener?
15:43Don't tell me you
15:44didn't put any
15:45hardener in it at all.
15:46You didn't tell me,
15:47do you,
15:48stupid fool?
15:49Why didn't you tell me?
15:50Don't call me
15:51a stupid fool.
15:52I told you to put it in.
15:53The trouble with you
15:54is, mate,
15:55you don't listen
15:56to anything I say.
15:57You should have
15:58read the instructions
15:59on the can.
16:00I couldn't,
16:01because when you
16:02pitched the paint,
16:03you tore the label
16:04off, didn't you?
16:05Is it too late
16:06to put any
16:07hardener in now?
16:08No.
16:09No.
16:10No.
16:11I can just
16:12scrape it off the wall
16:13and put it back
16:14in the tin again,
16:15you silly...
16:16Yeah, isn't it awful?
16:17Can't we just
16:18wipe it off a bit?
16:19No, don't talk wet.
16:20It takes five hours
16:21to dry our hair,
16:22we're that thin,
16:23and then it dries
16:24all frizzy.
16:25So, if we don't
16:26want a stipple defect,
16:27well, there's nothing
16:28we can do about it now.
16:29I'll wait till I get
16:30to the tap,
16:31I'll ask Nobby,
16:32see if he can
16:33think of something.
16:34Where are we
16:35going to sleep?
16:36In your bed.
16:37We can't sleep in here,
16:38mate,
16:39all the walls
16:40are still wet.
16:41You told me
16:42you've been sleeping
16:43in this room
16:44for nine years
16:45when it's all damp.
16:47I shook you
16:48and your blasted paint
16:49and I should have
16:50bought it in a shop.
16:51There's no bedside light,
16:52how are we going
16:53to switch the light off?
16:54Well, you get into bed,
16:55love, then I'll switch
16:56it off at the door.
16:57Oh, all right, then.
16:58Here, don't put that
16:59on there,
17:00the paint's still wet.
17:01This is ridiculous.
17:02Can't you do something?
17:03Yeah, I'll stick
17:04a nose on the door,
17:05cause you're wet paint.
17:08Oh, by the way,
17:09if you and Olive
17:10decide to play
17:11postman's knock,
17:12don't lean up
17:13against the wall, mate,
17:14because it's all wet.
17:15Oh.
17:33Arthur,
17:34you wake.
17:35Ah.
17:36What,
17:37what do you want?
17:38I can't find my glasses.
17:40What do you want them for?
17:42I want to go
17:43to the bathroom.
17:44Can't you do anything
17:45without your glasses?
17:48I can't see the way.
17:50Well, put the light on.
17:51The switch is by the door.
17:53Look, mate,
17:54you've done that journey
17:55three times every night
17:56for the last nine years.
17:57You ought to know
17:58me blindfold.
17:59Now, shut up.
18:08You clumsy beggar.
18:09Stand still
18:10whatever you do.
18:12I'll turn it on.
18:15Oh.
18:21Here, I've injured myself.
18:23Get out.
18:30What's been going on here?
18:35Don't tell me she's been
18:36chasing you around
18:37in the room, mate.
18:38Oh, shut up.
18:39Here, what's he doing
18:40sitting in that drawer?
18:42What are you doing?
18:43I am sitting in here
18:44because someone once
18:45told me it was good
18:46for the complexion,
18:47you stupid.
18:48Olive,
18:49get me a hand out.
18:50Oh, I love you.
18:51No,
18:52you're all wet in paint.
18:53It's all right,
18:54it's all right.
18:55Not on my vest.
18:56Here,
18:57give us a hand.
19:00Oh, look,
19:01he's broken the drawer.
19:03That's Olive's
19:04bottom drawer.
19:06No,
19:07it is bottom drawer.
19:09Hey.
19:10But don't you get it?
19:11Bottom drawer, you know.
19:12Oh, God, love.
19:13Come on.
19:14Here,
19:15have a sit down
19:16on the bed, love.
19:17You look really piled.
19:18Yeah, well,
19:19perhaps I will
19:20just for a moment.
19:21Just have a sit, love.
19:22Ow!
19:23I'm riddled
19:24with splinters,
19:25it's agony.
19:26Get away from the bed, dear.
19:27Olive will look after you.
19:28Oi!
19:29Don't worry,
19:30leave them there.
19:31They'll work their way out.
19:32Get what?
19:33Locked drawer.
19:34Get what?
19:35Locked drawer.
19:36What, down there?
19:37What, down there?
19:40Well, it travels.
19:43Here, love,
19:44I've got a needle.
19:45Well,
19:47not without your glasses
19:48that might end up anywhere.
19:51Let's stand and have a go.
19:52Oh, no, love,
19:53you can have my reading glass.
19:54Right, OK.
19:55Come on, give him the needle.
19:56Hold your head still,
19:57you're blighting the fact
19:58you are without them.
19:59Right, now then.
20:00Are you...
20:01Are you...
20:02Do you two mind
20:03leaving the room?
20:04Come on, get out,
20:05get out, go on.
20:06I'll guide you.
20:07Here, go on,
20:08that's it,
20:09it's all right.
20:10Come on, love,
20:11you'll get it.
20:12Well, don't stand there
20:13like that, mate.
20:14I can't get them out
20:15like that, can I?
20:16Well, lay on the bed,
20:17flat on the stomach.
20:18Go on, lay on the bed.
20:19Will you be careful?
20:20Bloody painful.
20:21You're a big baby,
20:22you are,
20:23that's all you are.
20:24Get over.
20:25Hold it up,
20:26hold it up.
20:27You're a big baby,
20:28you are,
20:29that's all you are.
20:30Get over.
20:31Hold it up,
20:32hold it up.
20:33God blimey,
20:34looks like a picture
20:35of the moon.
20:36Fancy them fellas
20:37going 250,000 miles
20:38when they get
20:39a picture like this.
20:40Oh,
20:41there's a beauty here,
20:42mate,
20:43hang on,
20:44hang on.
20:45Hang on.
20:46No,
20:47no,
20:48this needle's too small,
20:49let's get a bigger one.
20:50No, no,
20:51no,
20:52no,
20:53don't do that.
20:54Try on his tweezers,
20:55they're in the drawer there.
20:56I'll do it, mate.
20:57God blimey,
20:58they're a bit small
20:59aren't they?
21:00Look,
21:01if they get
21:02Olive's eyebrows out,
21:03they'll get anything out,
21:04get on with it.
21:05Oh,
21:06there's a beauty there.
21:07What are you doing?
21:08What do you mean,
21:09what am I doing?
21:10I'm looking for
21:11splinters,
21:12aren't I?
21:13Blimey,
21:14you look like
21:15Hedgehog down here,
21:16turn over.
21:17Oh,
21:18there's a beautiful
21:19patch there.
21:20I'm fed up
21:21with this.
21:22It's all your fault,
21:23I shouldn't have
21:24let you decorate
21:25the room
21:26in the first place.
21:27And to think
21:28you've got a bit of paint
21:29on your head.
21:30You may laugh,
21:31mate,
21:32but I'll tell you something,
21:33I'm having the builders
21:34in here tomorrow,
21:35they'll scrape this
21:36lot off and start
21:37from scratch
21:38and you can
21:39pay the bill.
21:40Right,
21:41if that's the way
21:42you feel about it,
21:43mate,
21:44here's the tools,
21:45here's the tools,
21:46and you can get
21:47the builder
21:48to take the
21:49splinters out
21:50and all.
21:51Oh,
21:52stay,
21:53stay,
21:54don't leave me
21:55like this.
21:56What a night,
21:57I'm not pinching
21:58any more paint
21:59from this depot,
22:00that's for sure,
22:01boy,
22:02I'm telling you that.
22:03And the builder
22:04in this morning,
22:05he wants 40 liquor
22:06to redecorate
22:07the room.
22:08I thought you told me
22:09he estimated 30.
22:10That was before
22:11we had a go at it.
22:12He wants another
22:13tenner to scrape
22:14it all off again.
22:15Never again,
22:16I'm telling you.
22:17Dan, Dan,
22:18thank God
22:19I caught you.
22:20What's up, Nobby?
22:21They're going to
22:22do a spot check
22:23in the stores.
22:24I've got to put
22:25that paint back.
22:26What are you talking
22:27about?
22:28You said it
22:29wouldn't be missed.
22:30Well, I'm sorry,
22:31I wasn't able
22:32to fiddle it so soon.
22:33It'll be five pound.
22:34Five pound?
22:35Get out of the way.
22:36If we don't get
22:37an Indian in
22:38inside an hour,
22:39well,
22:40we'll all get
22:41the job.
22:42Yeah?
22:43God,
22:44come on.
22:45God,
22:46have you got
22:47a fiver?
22:48What about
22:49a couple of
22:50pints of it?
22:51What a liberty,
22:52doing a spot check
22:53without informing us.
22:54Don't they
22:55do that?
22:56What's it,
22:57the governor?
22:58What?
22:59Oh.
23:00What's that?
23:01Good morning,
23:02Sam.
23:03See that?
23:04Yeah.
23:05It's what
23:06I told you.
23:07Management always
23:08gets the best perks.
23:09It's the only perks
23:10to have, mate.
23:11You can pinch it,
23:12take it home,
23:13bunk it back
23:14in the stores
23:15the next morning
23:16and nobody's
23:17only the wiser.
23:18Come on,
23:19let's get
23:20the spot check.
23:21Yeah, yeah.
23:22Yeah.
23:23Yeah.
23:24Yeah.
23:25Yeah.
23:26Yeah.
23:27Yeah.
23:28Yeah.
23:29Yeah.
23:30Yeah.
23:31Yeah.
23:32Yeah.
23:33Yeah.
23:34Yeah.
23:35Yeah.
23:36Yeah.
23:37Yeah.
23:38Yeah.
23:39Yeah.
23:40Yeah.
23:41Yeah.
23:42Yeah.
23:43Yeah.
23:44Yeah.
23:45Yeah.
23:46Yeah.
23:47Yeah.
23:48Yeah.
23:49Yeah.
23:50Yeah.