Blaubär & Blöd (u.a. Kurz und Knut - Bambus beschneiden)
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😹
FunTranscript
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00:25Welcome to Blaubee & Blöd, the mega-funny super-show with the super-funny Mega-Bear.
00:31Today you see Captain Blaubee as the brave king of the seas.
00:35Oh, I'm stoned.
00:38In addition, you see Captain Blaubee as the loving grandfather.
00:44Nobody can keep up with that.
00:46And you see Captain Blaubee as a flat sofa pillow.
00:51Exactly.
00:53What? I'd rather have heard that.
00:59Then I'd rather make the announcement.
01:02So, welcome to Blaubee & Blöd.
01:06As always with a fantastic Captain Blaubee.
01:09Have fun.
01:16Heinz is stoned.
01:19No, no, no, like this.
01:31Hello, people. Welcome to a new edition of...
01:37Today I'll explain to you how a telephone works.
01:41You think it's easy.
01:45But not for me.
01:47First you have to put the speaker on.
01:50Otherwise it doesn't ring.
01:57Here.
01:59Doesn't ring.
02:01Doesn't ring.
02:05Quite boring, such a telephone.
02:08That's why it's always good to have a few building blocks to play with.
02:14Then you don't get so bored.
02:18Oops.
02:21Such bad luck.
02:30You know what? If nobody calls, we'll call him ourselves.
02:37So, hello.
02:42You can't hear anything.
02:44The line is dead. I didn't know it died.
02:48That's sad, isn't it?
02:51Let's light a candle for the dead line.
03:04What do you do with a dead telephone?
03:08You can stir soup with the speaker.
03:11Coincidentally, I have a pot of soup here.
03:16Yes, great idea.
03:19Maybe not.
03:21Well, I'm not sure.
03:24Better ask your parents.
03:28The show continues with our customer show and the next bomb.
03:42Aaaaaah!
03:47What's going on?
03:49A loud youth is ruining the party?
03:53We're doing a scientific experiment.
03:56Why are you screaming?
03:58We're not screaming. We're singing.
04:00Our music book says that the high C can even break glasses.
04:04Don't listen to him. It's all nonsense.
04:07Well, you need a little effort for that.
04:10It's all nonsense.
04:12Practice makes perfect.
04:14Stop it!
04:16Of course. I studied singing.
04:19Of course.
04:20Even nautical special singing.
04:23Nautical special singing?
04:25Yes. Here's my diploma.
04:30There are only notes on it.
04:32Of course. It's a music diploma, isn't it?
04:35Nautical special singing is a compulsory subject at the captain's exam.
04:41You have to have completely different notes than the high C.
04:45Like this.
04:46The high X, for example, is so high that it can handle the heavy anchor wind on its own.
04:54You can't save the team, can you?
04:57And the high Y is so strong that even a grown-up ocean giant falls apart.
05:04Yes, very practical if you have to overtake the thing in general.
05:08That works?
05:10Do things.
05:12Of course, but that's nothing.
05:14Right on my first trip as a freshly baked captain,
05:18I landed in the middle of the Atlantic in a terrible, all-pervading hurricane.
05:24It blew so hard that I had to tie myself up so as not to be blown overboard.
05:31That's how I kept the elements in check.
05:35But the masts soon cracked like matches.
05:38How was I supposed to replace them?
05:40Alone. Without a team.
05:42With a sound conductor, of course.
05:45Singing with a sound conductor is the A and O of nautical special singing, isn't it?
05:51For every fallen mast, I sang a massive sound conductor over four octaves.
05:57In no time at all, my cane was seaworthy again.
06:00I thought the worst was over.
06:03But in the meantime, there was a funny wave of calm in September.
06:07Uncontrollably, I drove towards the knife-sharp cliffs of Panama.
06:12Now only the high Z could save me.
06:16The high Z?
06:18The high Z.
06:20Z like melting.
06:22The crowning of nautical special singing.
06:27I tied myself to the bow like a galleon figure
06:31and began to sing the cliffs in the highest notes.
06:35The high Z is so incisive that it even split rocks.
06:41I drove across the country like an icebreaker.
06:44Three parts.
06:45Until I finally reached the Pacific Ocean.
06:49In this way, the Panama Canal was created.
06:52Really?
06:53The Panamanians were, of course, enthusiastic.
06:56One even composed an opera about my heroic deed.
06:59Unfortunately, I forgot the title.
07:02Do you still have the high Z today?
07:04Unfortunately not.
07:05I probably sang a voice crack during the action.
07:10I would have been surprised.
07:12Nautical special singing.
07:14If that's true...
07:16Guys, I found an interesting record here.
07:19Do you want to listen?
07:21The original Panama Cremadon
07:23sings the nautical special canal aria in Z major.
07:27Nautical canal aria in Z major.
07:30That's right. That's what the piece was called.
07:35Is that nautical special singing?
07:38Hello, Deco.
07:41What's going on?
07:44Put that thing down!
07:46Now I'm falling through the plate.
07:51Just in time.
07:53Great. That was real music.
08:10Nautical special singing.
08:34Man, those are some guys.
08:40Nautical canal aria in Z major.
08:56This thing grows like weeds.
08:59I should cut the shoots at the top.
09:02But I can't reach it.
09:06Hey, Knut!
09:10He can't hear me again.
09:13Knut!
09:15Knut, wait!
09:19What's going on?
09:21I'm stressed.
09:23Knut, I'm glad you're here.
09:25Come in.
09:31So, what do you say?
09:34What do you say?
09:36It's a plant, I'd say.
09:40Of course it's a plant.
09:43A bamboo.
09:45And it grows too fast.
09:47The shoots have to be cut.
09:49Of course.
09:51Only with Knut everything will be fine.
09:53Relax.
09:59Well, he can do something, too.
10:05Watch out, vegetable!
10:07Watch out!
10:11Oh, no!
10:16Sorry.
10:18But now it doesn't grow so fast.
10:22Oh, no!
10:33Who left Knut on board?
10:36It wasn't me.
10:39Well, never mind.
10:51music plays
11:18dog barks
11:20dog whines
11:22dog growls
11:39dog growls
11:41Huh?
11:43Huh?
11:45Huh?
11:47Huh?
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11:59Huh?
12:01Huh?
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12:21Huh?
12:23Huh?
12:25Huh?
12:29Come on, come on now!
12:31Huh?
12:33Huh?
12:35Huh?
12:37Gosh!
12:38Gibberish!
12:41Gotcha!
12:45Hmm!
12:46Huh?
12:47Ahh!
12:49Okay.
12:52Haha!
12:53Doopey!
12:54된다.
12:55Ooh!
12:56Ah!
12:59Oh, no.
13:00I can't get my hands on.
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