Blaubär und Blöd (u.a. Kurz und Knut - Licht ausmachen)
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Welcome to Captain Bluebeard's channel.
00:02Do you hear anything?
00:04Nothing, right?
00:06Finally a day without constant snoring.
00:09That's because the snoring snout has left the ship.
00:12And voluntarily.
00:14I'm going to sleep.
00:16I'm going to sleep.
00:18I'm going to sleep.
00:20I'm going to sleep.
00:22I'm going to sleep.
00:24I'm going to sleep.
00:26That's because the snoring snout has left the ship.
00:29And voluntarily.
00:31Grandpa, the snoring snout left this note in the kitchen.
00:34Let me see.
00:36Dear Captain,
00:38I have a great half-day job now,
00:41where you can talk a lot.
00:43I'll be back late tonight.
00:46Yes, great, then we can have a really quiet TV evening.
00:49Yes, that's right.
00:51Then I'll have some crab chips,
00:53algae lemonade and pickled cucumbers.
00:56Great, Grandpa.
01:00Then let's go.
01:03Good evening, dear viewers.
01:05I'm the snoring snout with the new talk show.
01:08I'm glad to be here.
01:10It's a wonderful job.
01:12I can talk, talk, talk.
01:15Without snoring.
01:17Grandpa, switch.
01:19Hello, nice that you switched on.
01:21Also in the program I am the snoring snout.
01:24I am the new talk show.
01:26Hello, it doesn't make any sense to switch anywhere else.
01:29The snoring snout is everywhere.
01:31And now I'll tell you what to expect from us today.
01:34This time it will be particularly funny.
01:36What should I tell you?
01:37Oh, you again.
01:38So what am I for a television talk show?
01:40So talented.
01:41So let's go.
01:42Have fun.
01:45Heinz Blödsinn.
01:49No, no, no, like this.
02:00Hello people.
02:02Welcome to a new edition of ...
02:05Well, today I'll explain to you
02:07why it's bright during the day
02:09and not so at night.
02:11So not at all.
02:12It has to do with hydrogen.
02:17Oh, wait a minute.
02:22Mr. Blödsinn, that's not true at all.
02:24What?
02:25So it has nothing to do with hydrogen.
02:27Not?
02:28We only receive calls from viewers who complain about the brightness of the day.
02:30So please be patient and explain something right.
02:32I just hear it has nothing to do with hydrogen.
02:35Yes, then it's probably because of the sun.
02:39Let's say the lamp here is the sun.
02:43And it shines here on the earth.
02:46But only on one side.
02:48Here on the back it's dark, so night.
02:51And if the earth turns now ...
02:54Because it does.
02:56Why, the geyser knows.
02:58Maybe that's the hydrogen.
03:02What?
03:03Yes, yes, yes, yes.
03:05Yes, apparently not.
03:07In any case, it is bright on one side of the earth
03:10and dark on the other side.
03:13And in a solar eclipse it is dark everywhere.
03:16Because the sun goes out.
03:18But that doesn't matter.
03:20Because we on earth, we are smart.
03:22We just turn on the light.
03:25Then the sun can paint us.
03:27Yes, that's how it is with day and night.
03:30But I'm not quite sure.
03:32Better ask your parents.
03:36Don't tell me how I can find solutions.
03:45The last summer holidays.
03:47I was with my friend Felix in the camp in Sweden.
03:51We wanted to scare two girls.
03:54We had calculated everything so that we could find the tent at night.
03:59Our plan looked like this.
04:01We wanted to tear open the tent door,
04:04turn on the flashlight and blind them with it.
04:07And shout out loud, attack!
04:09We wanted to improvise the rest.
04:11When everyone went to sleep, we sneaked off.
04:14Felix tore away the tent plans with one jerk.
04:18And I turned on the flashlight and started.
04:21Felix didn't start yet.
04:24He called before, attack!
04:28But then he also started.
04:30Our caretaker, naked.
04:32The next day, she didn't say anything about it anymore.
04:36Neither did we.
04:37We wanted to turn red every time we saw her.
04:58The Doctor
05:10Dr. Mätschlaubeer, the expert and laughing doctor.
05:13He proves again today, healing is a matter of luck.
05:21Hello patient.
05:23Hello doctor.
05:27Sie haben mich für einen Reaktionstest bestellt?
05:31So ist es. Setzen Sie sich. Dann kriegen Sie erst mal eine Spritze.
05:36Brauch ich die denn?
05:38Nö, aber die lag hier grad so oben.
05:40Na gut.
05:42Aua! Und? Jetzt besser?
05:45Nö. Ich weiß, das sagen alle.
05:48So, dann können wir ja jetzt mit dem Reaktionstest beginnen.
05:52Schauen Sie auf diese Leinwand und rufen Sie Stopp, wenn Sie einen Tiger sehen.
06:02Stopp.
06:03Blödsinn, das ist kein Tiger, das ist eine Banane.
06:07Ach so.
06:08Weiter geht's. Sie rufen ihr Stopp, wenn Sie einen Tiger sehen.
06:13Hallo, was sehen Sie da?
06:23Ein Tiger.
06:25Warum rufen Sie dann nicht Stopp?
06:27Ich dachte, vielleicht kommt noch einer. Dann muss ich nicht zweimal rufen.
06:32Sie sind wirklich der dämlichste Patient, den ich je gehabt habe.
06:37Ja und? Macht das was?
06:40Das macht 20 Euro.
06:43Vielen Dank, Herr Doktor, Sie haben mir sehr geholfen.
06:49Und noch was, Herr Doktor?
06:51Was denn?
06:52Stopp!
06:53Raus hier!
06:56Bis zum nächsten Mal bei Doktor Mädsch-Schlaubeer. Und denken Sie dran, heilen ist Glückssache.
07:05Jetzt kommt unser Agent Faulpelz mit der Lizenz zum Zerstören.
07:12Los geht's.
07:28Ach, wenn's so hell ist, dann kann ich nicht schlafen. Wie mach ich das bloß?
07:36Hey, Knut!
07:38Keine Zeit.
07:41Du kommst sofort her, du Faulpelz.
07:44Was ist'n?
07:46Der Lichtschalter ist kaputt, Knut. So kann ich nicht schlafen.
07:51Kannst du mir bitte das Licht ausmachen?
07:59Ist aus. Fertig.
08:02Oh nein.
08:05Nein!
08:08Es war's.
08:23Warum bittet Karin eigentlich immer den Knut um Hilfe? Der träumt doch den ganzen Tag nur.
08:29Naja, mir soll's recht sein. Hauptsache ist doch, dass wir etwas zu lachen bekommen.