CRAYON SHINCHAN クレヨンしんちゃん EP63
anime,jdrama,cartoon
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00One, two, three, hut!
00:04Kitchen!
00:08Summershine Cleaning
00:12I love the flying pecker
00:14He's an action buster, the motion feature
00:16I wanna ride in his zeppelin
00:18He's played by Johnny Depp and his CGI for his talent
00:22Hello pussy, I got a flying pecker for you
00:25Peck, peck, peck, peck, peck
00:26I so don't wanna be Emily Blunt
00:28You've got her forehead
00:30But I have Amy Adams' red hair
00:32Besides mom, you like John Krasinski
00:35I'm just crushing, I don't like like him
00:37We can't start our crime scene cleaning till we know who is who
00:40Maybe Shane can like help us
00:44Wait, who are you guys?
00:45Ah! Your mom's my mentor, you dated my daughter!
00:48So awkward
00:49Yeah, I guess I forgot we dated during the two-year summer break
00:53When did you get horse feet?
00:55These are real replica Ed Hardy's
00:57You don't text, and you don't even tweet
00:59It's nothing personal, I kinda live in my own head
01:02So what, you think that because my daughter's a dwarf, you can just overlook her needs?
01:06You never held my hair back once while I purged
01:09Uh-huh, you literally are pretty easy to overlook
01:12Well, Shin, maybe we can date again
01:14Huh? Uh, nah, you guys are always looking for a sugar daddy
01:18Uh-huh, uh-huh
01:20I'll pass
01:22You're a bad boy
01:23Bad boy?
01:24Don't make me use my uppercase voice
01:26You're giving off mad Gosselin vibes right now
01:29Yeah, I have to go now
01:31Such a bad boy
01:32Well, that sure was uncomfortable
01:34He has the soul of Nick Jonas and the ass of Joe Jonas
01:38It's you guys again, I could swear we just wrapped things up
01:42Well, if you're gonna be walking behind me, at least make sure it's always nine steps
01:48I am offended by that, unless of course it's gas related
01:51Uh, well, it's custom here
01:54It's also custom for hotties to dress like bikini gazers
01:58How much waxing do you think that's going to require?
02:00I have very hairy armpits
02:02Whatever, we're not here for you or your customs, we're going to your mom for business help
02:07And unlike you, she loves us
02:10God, I hate people
02:12It's so nice when the house is all...
02:18That was a weird, sick feeling
02:20Something annoying must be nearby
02:26That's right, the house is sparkling clean, enjoy it before Shin ruins it again
02:30Housebreaker reporting for duty, sir
02:33I've accepted, I cannot stop you
02:35Requesting permission to clean up your son's mess, mentor
02:38Hey, holy crap Summer, why are you here?
02:41Because I need your genius
02:44My genius?
02:46Professor Mitzi will solve your problems
02:48Except for math, I'm not so good at math
02:50She taught me everything I know
02:53Teach me how to clean houses, mentor
02:56That's it?
02:57Paris and I are starting our own crime scene cleaning business
03:02Our house does look like a crime scene
03:04That's because you break or soil everything
03:06Sorry to lose my ish like this, but we're totally broke
03:09Two hotties like us cleaning crime scenes is our very last chance
03:12To get money?
03:14We finally found Paris' dad, but Phil's changed, he's in a self-help group now
03:18And he's poor, he's all talk to you never when we asked him for a sidekick
03:23When I did him, he said he was rich and liked spanking
03:25You know, all the things girls love to hear
03:28I'm an old man who likes to spank hotties
03:31You smell like an old man
03:33We need your help, teach us how to clean, we're on our knees
03:36Well, not literally
03:38Just bleached him
03:39You guys bleach your kneecaps?
03:41We bleach all our body parts that look puckered
03:43Don't judge, bitch
03:44This is dumb, they're just ripping off that Amy Adams movie
03:48Then again, the murder rate here has spiked lately
03:50And raising shins taught me to clean anything
03:52As her mentor, I could get a cut of their profits
03:56Uh, so I have to use my hands?
03:59Yeah, pretend there are bodily fluids everywhere
04:01The bowels release when a person dies
04:03Worst case, she chickens out and leaves me alone
04:06Best case, her business is a hit and I get rich, win-win
04:10Mentor, I can't do this, it's too icky
04:12What?
04:13Summer, think about all the money you two can make
04:15And I can make
04:17I can do this
04:18Yeah, go Amy Adams
04:19I'm doing this for you, Emily Blunt
04:22Wait, Summer, you're making a bigger mess
04:24I'm faking it till I make it, that always works
04:27Not this time, just stop
04:29No, no, I got it
04:32Stop it!
04:34That's a horrible way to clean up bodily fluids
04:36Oh, you squeeze it out
04:38So now you don't push around the blood
04:40How could you not know this?
04:42Here's how to clean the face goo
04:44Yay, shotgun suicides are so gonna make us rich
04:47Weird
04:48What should I spend the money on?
04:50Oh crap, now she knows I'm gonna try to muscle in on the business
04:54Mitzi, if you wanted, all you had to do was ask
04:56We would be honored to make you the first employee of Summershine Cleaning
05:03I can't work under my apprentice
05:05Make me a silent partner or learn nothing more
05:08Let's show them
05:10Girls, follow me
05:11There's that ass again
05:16Open it
05:17Okay
05:21Sometimes hoarders are crushed by their own filth
05:24It's beautiful
05:29No one can teach you to clean up after hoarders better than me
05:34You're pretty ruthless, mom
05:37It's like Uncle Bernie's
05:39I don't need your help on this one
05:42I have tons of experience cleaning up after hoarders
05:44My Uncle Bernie was a hoarder
05:46He was even on that A&E show, Hoarders
05:48So don't think your cleaning lessons can scare me into giving you a part of our business
05:54Sorry, Mitz
05:55Manic Madness also runs in my fam
05:57Okay, but I can still get a cut
05:59And you get to wear totally banging uniforms
06:03Well, I was wrong
06:04These outfits are the perfect way to let the world know
06:07Summershine Cleaning will march to its own beat
06:10Just like Lady Gaga
06:11Good reference, Summer
06:13Now I must teach you the way
06:14Fill my mind like it's my behind
06:17Shit blood
06:18And we'll even clean up grease
06:22I thought she said screen grease
06:27Great, let's do some more practice
06:29Sweet
06:30Pretend all this junk is some dead landlady's jars of urine
06:33Wait, urine? That wasn't in the movie
06:37If you want to clean crime scenes, you gotta harden yourself to the worst messes
06:42Now watch me clean this pretend urine
06:44Cleaning's like judo
06:46Use the filth against itself
06:50You're so pimp
06:54I am pimp
07:03And the crime scene is clean
07:08That's hot
07:09Mentor, I'm such a poser
07:11When it comes to Summershine Cleaning, you get to be Amy Adams
07:14Now test me with your worst
07:17I can do it
07:18Do you, like, think I sucked off more than I can swallow?
07:23You'll do just fine, Emily Blunt
07:25Yeah?
07:27Pretend the closet's a dumpster
07:30No!
07:32You just bounced a head onto the street
07:34Watch me
07:35Hi-yah!
07:38Grab a corpse part and throw
07:40Yes, Mentor
07:42Perfect
07:44Now throw that bag of bile and feces
07:46Got it
07:47Shin, start farting to give the crime scene a more authentic smell
07:50Never done it before
07:51Oh dear
07:52Picture the grossest crime scene ever
07:54Is he really gonna fart?
07:56Don't, Shin, that's ghetto
07:59Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh
08:03Here's more!
08:06Georgie goes rogue
08:10Georgie, Consuela made you some flan before I had to let her go
08:14Yes, found it
08:16You can enjoy the flavors of Mexico without your face becoming as filthy as Mexico
08:20Right
08:21And wash your hands
08:22I'm pretty sure Consuela had the swine flu
08:24K
08:25I'll miss Consuela
08:26She did a great job taking the blame when I broke something
08:28But now that we're poor, I guess we have to do what poor people do
08:31and hire a maid who works for less
08:33Georgie Herbert Walker Welch Ellis Sheldon Malin Pierce Prescott III
08:37Huh?
08:39What is this wretched trash?
08:42And why was it under your Rush Limbaugh book?
08:45Mother, the Patriot Act does not apply to my desk
08:48This family's lost everything and you waste your money on
08:51what appear to be a pair of lesbians from some liberal Hollywood claptrap
08:55This isn't like you, Georgie
08:57Gotta be strong
08:59Gotta be strong
09:00This is me!
09:01I didn't choose to be this way, but it's who I am!
09:04No, don't say it
09:05I love the happy heiresses
09:08Yes, I'll save you!
09:17Delinquent!
09:22If you think I'm a delinquent, then I'll just have to become one!
09:26Georgie!
09:29Georgie! Get back here!
09:31There are re-education camps we can send you to
09:34You'll get to play with flight suit George Bush action figures
09:37Doesn't that sound fun?
09:40If my own mother will shun me for loving you,
09:43then no one can ever find out about us
09:47I long for the day we could go public
09:50In the Wall Street sense, not the socialist sense
09:54You'll be safe here
09:56Mother doesn't believe in the postal system
10:01That's it! I'm officially a runaway
10:03Like that pretentious jerk in Into the Wild
10:05Soon I'll be burning money
10:06Getting a job to make money to replace the money I burned
10:09Hanging out with aging hippies
10:10And eating poison potato seeds in a broken down bus
10:13Because I'm too dumb to buy a map which would tell me
10:15I'm only a quarter mile from the river crossing
10:17And then that commie Sean Penn will make a self-indulgent movie lionizing me
10:21And that will be the most tragic part of all
10:24Huh? That is one big piece of poop
10:31Good grief, Shin. What the hell are you doing?
10:33Trying to get stuck in the shoe of a giant
10:38That's harsh
10:39And she did that all because she found something in my desk
10:41The specifics of which aren't in any way pertinent to the telling of this story
10:46Then she has the nerve to call me a delinquent
10:48I'll show her delinquent
10:49Do what?
10:50Shin, you're a mischievous scamp who's always getting into all sorts of wacky hijinks
10:53You have to teach me how to be a delinquent
10:56If anybody should be teaching anybody how to be a delinquent, it should be us
11:00Hoodie blocker Ogin
11:02Thyroid Mary
11:03And me, rough and ready Ryuko, fearless leader of
11:06The Crimson Scorpions
11:09That was slick
11:10Ooh, so delinquents are nerdy schoolgirls who haven't sprouted boobies yet
11:15They can be, but not by definition
11:17We're not nerds, we're the baddest, most hardcore chicks this side of hell
11:21Is that why you all dress the same?
11:23Why you-
11:24Chill, boss
11:25Not worth it
11:26Don't let him rattle your cage
11:27Why were you flapping your gums about the day ward?
11:30Cause he wants to be one
11:31I'm Georgie Prescott III and it's a great pleasure to make your acquaintance
11:35So, Poindexter
11:38You wanna be a delinquent like we are?
11:40Yes, ma'am
11:41How cute. I remember when I first heard the calling to be a JD
11:44That's juvenile delinquent to you
11:46Yes, our gang is finally getting a boy member stuck on that egg, fuchsia stand crabs
11:50Try calling us goody two-shoe virgins now, you floozy suzies
11:54You'll show him how to wear gray flannel and pretend to be tough and talk like he's in a black-and-white movie
11:59Yeah!
12:02We don't talk like we're in a black-and-white flick
12:04Though if it were, I'd hope it'd be a Tab Hunter picture
12:07He's dreamy
12:08We're Tab Hunter Hunters
12:10Guys, ignore the meddling ankle biter
12:12Wait, how do you know I want a medal for ankle biting?
12:15Think you're tough, little man? You ever play chicken?
12:18Make beaks with your hands, slap your arms like they're wings
12:21Shake your tail feathers down
12:23And then you clap four times
12:26Neat-o!
12:28That is not what I meant!
12:30Gangs is so violent
12:32I'm disappointed in today's youth gangs
12:34Quit your horsing around
12:35We've gotta put this little square through our gang initiation to see if he's really tough enough to join the Crimson Scorpions
12:41You think you got the stones for it?
12:43Yes, ma'am
12:44Then it's time to prove you have the toughness to be a toughie like us toughies
12:48Uh, okay
12:49Fetch my weapon!
12:51Right-o
12:52Should I tell them I'm a junior member of the NRA?
12:54A toy mallet?
12:56Even Nancy Pelosi wouldn't try to ban that
12:58Alright, pocket square, let's pop the clutch and get this initiation started
13:02Wait, this looks like fun I wanna play
13:05Okay, but first we gotta see if your hide is tough enough
13:08See?
13:09I don't wanna see that!
13:11But you said you wanted to
13:13I'm only gonna let one of you into our gang
13:15What?
13:16First you two will face off
13:17You'll stare each other down with your toughest stares
13:19And whoever looks away has to put an egg in their shoe and beat it
13:22I will not look away!
13:24Yeah, neither will I
13:25Someone has to
13:26Now, stare down!
13:38Yay, I'm the toughest!
13:40This isn't about goofy faces, it's about toughness!
13:43These games just don't get comedy
13:45I don't suppose a mulligan would apply here?
13:47Try it again and this time be serious
13:49And... stare!
14:00That's not being tough! Break it up, you two!
14:03Oh no, I just kissed my political future goodbye
14:07When I stared into his eyes, it just seemed like the right thing to do
14:11Clearly you fruitcakes aren't butch enough to be crimson scorpions
14:14Please give me one more chance like America gave WN04
14:18Fine, just stuff a bobby sock in it, kid
14:20Thanks
14:21Gang initiation phase two
14:23Make like you're outnumbered by a rival crew
14:25You drop one quip that cuts right to the bone and leaves them boohooing
14:28What is it?
14:29So, are your mothers all on welfare?
14:31Did the Dems' oppressive alternative minimum tax put your barbershops all out of business?
14:36That is the worst put down I've ever heard
14:39Ooh, I wanna go!
14:41Well, it has to be better
14:46Yo, yo mama's so fat, she poops a lot
14:50That's awful! You gotta strike fear into their hearts!
14:54Oh, I got it! I have an orange alert put down that will terrify them
14:58You already blew your one more chance
15:01You are no Tab Hunter
15:03That's for sure
15:04But I've never failed a test in my whole life! Please, I have to be a delinquent
15:11Why's he want this so bad?
15:13Whisper, whisper, whisper, whisper
15:15You don't say
15:16Hey!
15:18Because I'm such a rebel, I'm gonna rebel against what I said before
15:22If you pass this next test, kiddo, you'll be a crimson scorpion for life
15:25I swear I'll ace it
15:27You'd really do anything to be a delinquent, wouldn't you?
15:29Yeah, absolutely anything
15:32Oh, yeah? Would you knife your own mother?
15:37Well, I...
15:38Yes or no?
15:46Well, I guess I'd do that
15:48Wrong answer!
15:50We may be a gang of tough-as-nails delinquents, but we never disrespect our mamas
15:54Do you hear me, you nitwit?
15:56Our moms deserve respect
15:57After all, they shoved us out their poonannies
15:59And mine works as a nurse so she can get free samples of experimental acne creams for me
16:03See ya!
16:05Wait for me!
16:19Mother!
16:21My sweet Georgie
16:22Georgie
16:26I'm sorry I slapped you
16:28Usually I take my rage out on Consuela
16:30No, Mother, I'm sorry for acting like a delinquent and wasting money on the heiresses
16:34Here, keep it
16:37You mean that?
16:38Mm-hmm
16:39I realize that spending money on frivolous things we can't afford, like your dolls or our country club membership
16:44Help us to maintain the appearance of being wealthy and boost our confidence
16:47In much the same way America gives billions it doesn't have to fight AIDS in Africa
16:51So delinquents are chicks who do nice things for Georgie?
16:54No, and if you tell anyone about this we will bop you with a squeaky mallet
16:57Yeah, because we're hardcore and have a rep to protect
17:00Well, kid, I think we'll be seeing a lot of each other around here
17:03Maybe in eight years if you're still in high school and I'm in high school but still look like this
17:12Here's more!
17:15The Itsy Bitsy Sisters
17:19This witness protection ain't so bad
17:22You shouldn't say that out loud
17:24Huh?
17:26Whoa, whoa, don't be afraid, kid, I'm a cop
17:29Is everything okay?
17:31The address of the mansion we set you up in has been compromised
17:34My mom is there!
17:36I know. Two birds with one bullet
17:39They're watching you
17:41Oh, no!
17:42I'll stay with you two and keep Benzali's men from breaking in and slitting your throats
17:47This Killer Cop Chronicle spin-off show sucks balls
17:51Come on, a Lady Killer Cop?
17:53You watch shows just so you can hate them
17:56Are we too late?
17:58Just act natural in case they're watching
18:006-5-5-3-2-1
18:05We're in!
18:06And you're out of time. I killed Benzali
18:09Just like I'm gonna kill you and your bitch mom
18:12Because I am Lady Killer Cop
18:15She killed me with boredom
18:20You're right. Killer Cop should be a man
18:22Yeah, he's all about cappin' and tappin'
18:24Now what?
18:27Whoa, time to run
18:29Get it? Cause I painted a watch on my foot
18:33Next time I wanna watch great TV, I'll give you a call
18:36I thought you hated it
18:37Yes, that's true
18:39You sure you can't stay longer? I've got a new recipe for homemade ganache
18:43But I've already got plans to pretend the left side of my body is a T-Rex
18:46That's trying to eat my right side. It's gonna be intense
18:49Try not to use your teeth, okay?
18:51Killer Cop likes to kill kids and killers
18:54He'll kill anyone who's in his way
18:57He really likes to kill them when it's Sunday
18:59I wanna buy his movies on Blu-Ray
19:01Hey kid, can you help me out?
19:04I'm looking for the Nohara family. Do you know them?
19:07Well, I've seen them naked
19:09It's like that crappy Killer Cop spin-off
19:12Hold on, where do you wanna find these Noharas anyhow?
19:16Well, let's just say they're in for a big surprise
19:19Why? Cause you'll shoot them?
19:22What? Today?
19:25The light's good
19:27Yeah, I'll shoot them
19:34Then Mitzi'll focus on how talented I've become instead of my whole crab situation
19:39I get paid to shoot people, you know
19:43I've been looking for her for days
19:45Why would anyone wanna find Mom on purpose?
19:48Wait, crab situation? Of course!
19:51Last week she took us to that seafood market and made us fill up on free crab samples so she wouldn't have to cook dinner
19:57Too much crab sampling
19:58I'll kill her
19:59Gotta warn Mom!
20:01No, wait kid, you gotta help me!
20:03Why would I help her kill my family?
20:07Nothing's making sense!
20:10Hey Shin, wait!
20:12Shin, did you just call that kid Shin?
20:15Uh, yeah
20:16And his last name?
20:17Nohara
20:18Well crap, that's my nephew
20:20Thanks dork!
20:22Carrying an attache case does not make you a dork
20:26Wait, I'm not some creepy stranger!
20:29You're stranger than a stranger!
20:33You don't know me, but you're my nephew!
20:40Best of luck!
20:42Best of luck!
20:43Mom, Code Red!
20:45Emergency or the Mountain Dew?
20:47Code Red emergency! A crazy lady wants to shoot me!
20:50Why are you just watching that awful killer cop spin-off, Shin?
20:53She's gonna kill us cause we ate all that free crab!
20:56Oh please, taking limitless samples is my right as a consumer
21:01Oh my god, his serious eyes! He's serious!
21:05Oh crap, there really is a crazy lady coming after us!
21:09It's her! I'll stay here while you shield me with your big fat bulletproof butt!
21:16Police, this is Mitzi Nohara! There's a whack job!
21:18Mom, her ding-dongs are getting ding-dongier!
21:20No, I'm not asking for it!
21:23Mitzi, come on!
21:24Try to get here before we get stabbed!
21:27I'll take care of this myself!
21:31Mitzi, open up! It's your baby sister!
21:33She's a delusional stalker too!
21:35Well, I've had a good run
21:36Yeah
21:39Mitzi?
21:46Is that really you?
21:47Of course!
21:48It's been so long I didn't even recognize you!
21:50But I was just saying it was me
21:52Look, Mitzi, in Casca Bay, no one's who they say they are
21:55In fact, half the people here are homeless schizo psychopaths
21:59Sweet, that's who I love to shoot!
22:00Told you!
22:01Right, you're a photographer! Now it makes sense!
22:04When I say shoot, I just mean taking pictures
22:06But why was he going on about craps?
22:08Some dude gave me lice!
22:12Ah! Oh, crap!
22:14Sorry! False alarm! She's my sister! Don't arrest her! Sorry!
22:18They still arrested her?
22:21Wow, that's hilarious!
22:22Yeah, it's hysterical
22:24That's cool. They deloused me before Mitzi posted bail
22:27There's always a bright side, but why did the cops have a warrant out on you?
22:31Selling illegal firearms. It's how I've been getting my kicks
22:34Selling illegal firearms. It's how I've been getting my cash
22:37I'm getting crabby in my crotchy
22:39You don't have crabs!
22:41But just to be safe, I should get myself arrested and have a prison shower like Aunt Bitzi
22:45No, no, no! No prison!
22:47Just enjoy your aunt
22:48Okay
22:49God, Bitzi's hot
22:50So, you spent the last five years shooting wars and poor people?
22:53Oh, uh, yeah
22:55She's so unstable
22:57I wasn't planning on looking you guys up till I got my life sorted out
23:01Like your crabs?
23:02Crabs or no crabs, you're so awesome, Bitzi
23:04Going to war zones?
23:05It's a trip
23:07I'd like to fight in a war
23:09I'm already good at shooting sharp objects right at people's eyes and or butts
23:13You're a little old to be a child soldier
23:15Shin, don't talk like that! War is hell!
23:18So, did seeing war help with your maturity?
23:21No, but in Africa, I dated a gunrunner
23:24He trained child soldiers
23:26And they got me hooked on brown-brown
23:28Oh
23:30Yeah, I've heard of brown-brown
23:31That's coke mixed with gunpowder, right?
23:33Yep
23:34Take your drugs every day or you'll end up like him
23:37Shin, not now!
23:38She stopped taking her drugs once
23:40Now she can't have scissors
23:42You're random
23:43Not at the table!
23:45But you said I should stop making fart noises and act more grown-up at dinner
23:49Oh, Shin
23:50But seriously, how is Mom?
23:52You didn't tell her?
23:53Hearing Mom's in the nuthouse could make her relapse
23:56Back in New York, the beautiful princess saw her drug addiction ruin her career
24:02So she sold her guns to go home
24:04Any guns left?
24:05Shin, action bastard's on!
24:08Don't mention her mom, don't mention her mom, don't mention her mom
24:11You're pretty like your mom
24:12Thanks
24:13Damn it
24:14I look way better now that I'm kicking the drugs
24:16Good, don't go crazy
24:17Damn it!
24:18So, Bitsy
24:19Yeah?
24:20Think you're able to handle the ups and downs of life?
24:22Yeah, well, except I'm broke and all out of guns to sell for money
24:27Well, so, how much do you need?
24:29Not counting bail bonds, gambling debts, and palimony?
24:35I wasn't planning on staying long
24:37And it seems like neither were you
24:39Yeah, well, it's...
24:40Take this
24:41I co-own a little crime scene cleaning business
24:44But never mention this or that to Hiro
24:46Got it
24:47Use it to start a new life in town
24:49K, I think I'll start my own studio, that's it
24:52Great idea
24:54And when you're stable again, we can go visit mom
24:56K
24:57In the sanatorium
24:59Bye
25:00Bye
25:01I hate to boot her, but she's gotta find her own way
25:04Wow, a studio
25:06On the other hand, five thousand dollars would buy an ass load of...
25:13Brown, brown...
25:14Cocaine and gunpowder!
25:20That's all!
25:27Woke up late this morning
25:28A storm was really rolling
25:30Frogs and dogs were raining from the sky
25:33Everything seems awkward to me
25:35Nothing's just as it should be
25:36If this keeps on, I'm sure I won't get by
25:40But then I close my eyes and try to smile
25:43I know things are bad and getting worse
25:46But after all this, I can rest a while
25:49And then I'll party, party
25:52Party, party, join us, join us
25:57Shake your day away and you can
25:58Party, party, join us, join us
26:03Shake your blues away
26:08Yo, breaking vacation, huh?
26:11This party's shaking and it ain't just shaking me
26:14I see that smile, you're grinning ear to ear
26:17Sing this song, you should really sing it clear
26:20Just sing along with us
26:25Party, party, join us, join us
26:27Party, party, join us, join us
26:29Party, party, join us, join us
26:30Shake your day away and you can
26:32Party, party!
26:33Oh, I'm bad for truth
26:35Party!
26:36Brand old party it is
26:38Party, party!