CRAYON SHINCHAN クレヨンしんちゃん EP56-2
anime,jdrama,cartoon
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00One! Two! Three! Ha!
00:04Jetsam!
00:08Lose pussy, cat.
00:15It's freezing. I'll warm you up if we play snuggle pirate.
00:19Well, we could go play at Boo's house.
00:21No, not today. Phillip's resting at his burrito and wants green peas and quiet.
00:25Boo, which pill did you take today?
00:27I'd rather be cold than risk my sanity at Boo's house.
00:30Calm down and play snuggle pirate.
00:32Get that out of my face. It smells like farts.
00:36It's too cold to even move. Boys, you better embrace me. I need your manly body heat.
00:41Hold on, guys. As the group's token non-maso girl, I should be the one you keep warm.
00:46You can put your hands or feet on or in any part of me, okay?
00:49Look, a bee.
00:51Oh, yeah.
00:52Good eyes, Georgie.
00:53I like bees in my soup.
00:55So you're just gonna let me freeze like a little girl chained up outside on a cold night?
00:59You have some issues.
01:01Yeah, no offense, but if we're gonna warm up by touching, I'd rather it be by touching hotties.
01:06Warm up with my butt! Warm up with my butt! Warm up with my butt! Warm up with my butt!
01:12Yes, ladies, I know this is what grown-ups do.
01:14Butts aren't to be used for fun, no matter what the gay lobby says. Now let's find something to do.
01:20Boo, was that you?
01:23Yeah, was that a high-pitched fart? Nice, Boo.
01:27There must be a cat around here, you idiot.
01:29You're all idiots. It's in a box right there.
01:36Wow, he's adorable.
01:38So alive.
01:40If you bite me, I might have to hurt you.
01:42I'll call you Pattinson.
01:44Or you, Edward Cullen.
01:46No, we should call him Mr. Fluffy McNutter.
01:50Hey guys, you like my fur scarf? It's just peed on.
02:04This cat is pure evil.
02:06Holy crap, Georgie, it says it only eats mice bones.
02:09It says give it a nice home.
02:11You're a duck.
02:13Well, we can't just leave it here. One of us has to take it home now.
02:16I'm pretty sure my mom will get mad if I bring home an evil kitty.
02:19He's not evil, Ma, so Shin's just a moron.
02:22So are you bringing it home then?
02:24I'd love to, but my mom's allergic to non-purebred animals.
02:28Well, even if it's not evil, I can't take it home.
02:31My mom only lets me have pets with protective shells.
02:34I'd love to give Happiness Bunny something to play with,
02:37but my mom just warned me today that our pet cemetery is full.
02:41Uh-huh, uh-huh. Well, I can't take it because I got the dog and stuff, so you know.
02:46Uh...
02:48He'll kill my snot.
02:50Well, guys, I guess that's that. Put him in the box and give him some mice bones.
02:54This might sound crazy, but we could find a nice mommy and daddy and give it to them.
02:58Give it away? We should sell it.
03:03Yo, hottie, you wanna help us sell a little pussy?
03:06I bet a lot of people would like buying some cute white pussy from you.
03:09No, this is Frank's block.
03:12Hear that? Sounds like some Frank guy already has a franchise here for selling kittens.
03:16We need a new location.
03:17Uh-huh, uh-huh.
03:19This looks like Frank. He'll tell us where to go.
03:22Where my bitch is at?
03:23Um, this guy's a cat lover?
03:26He looks like the man who brings mommy home early in the morning.
03:29I got this.
03:31On second thought, I think he's got a gun!
03:34Better check the meth house.
03:39So much for selling cats.
03:41We need to get some protection.
03:43What we need is to think about people we know who might want this cat.
03:46So to be clear, this kitty is not evil, right guys?
03:49Before we all start making fun of Maso, can I just say,
03:52screw the cemetery, seeing the type of violent men who sell pussies on the streets
03:56makes me just wanna take the cat home so daddy will get mad and start giving us frizzies again.
04:00Okay, she's not getting the cat, but do we have anyone else in mind?
04:04If your dad beating you or not, I've totally lost track.
04:08We must find a nice home for this duck.
04:10Okay, but what you're holding is a cat.
04:12Wait, I know someone desperate to get a pussy!
04:16You are the first meat spacers I've seen in my many yaron.
04:19Please sit at my official talisman playing table.
04:26Uh, what is this bowl next to my foot?
04:29There's one next to me too!
04:31One of them contains urine.
04:34Relax, it's just my closed loop life support system.
04:38So if you touch something hot underneath this jamba-sized sluggy,
04:41then it's a food pan, and if it's warm, it's a bed pan.
04:44Guys, I'm starting to have doubts about Yanro's candid to see his cat father.
04:48Well, at least he has food.
04:50He lives on Pocky and spray cheese.
04:53I dub this kitten Cringer.
04:56The cat seems to like him, so that's something.
04:59I have many concerns. I will stay to protect the duck.
05:03Wow, Boo, who knew you were so heroic?
05:05Now your bravery is making me all tingly.
05:07Boo, Jumbo's not so bad, he's cool.
05:10I'll be as close to this cat as a hungry elf.
05:13My plan is for me and Cringer to leave meat space and evolve into digital beings.
05:17What? You're going to live inside of a video game?
05:20Duh, the action-bastard MMORPG.
05:25Sounds like something's cute in there.
05:27I don't know how cute.
05:31Hide in my sluggy!
05:33I deposited my 900 rupees for rent.
05:36I'm not here to collect your rent.
05:42That bowl is filled with a warm apple cider.
05:45This isn't my first encounter with a bedpan boy.
05:48And it's not going to be your last,
05:50because if you don't tell me what kind of little furry critter you're hiding in there,
05:53I'm going to beat your kneecaps in with that toy laser sword of yours.
05:58Nothing.
06:06Meow.
06:07Meow.
06:08Meow.
06:09Meow.
06:10Meow.
06:11Kids today with their damn autism.
06:16Glaucoma's killed my peripheral vision.
06:22And because of the landlady's inoperable vision problems,
06:25they all managed to toss the cat for ten minutes, until...
06:29Ah!
06:33First pussy I've had my fingers on in a long time.
06:37Well, she didn't kill the cat, so that's good.
06:39The duck lives.
06:40Shem, this was your dumb idea.
06:42Yeah, now what?
06:43How could I have known there was a man-lady there?
06:45You moron, don't you remember living here when you blew up your parents' house?
06:49Thirty minutes of rushed planning later.
06:52So, we just wait for it to die?
06:54It's a cat, not a baby.
06:55For the last time, we're going to spy on people and see if they treat the cat well.
06:59If they look like a good owner, then we'll jump out and hit them up for some cash.
07:02No one's come by yet. Don't you worry, Edward.
07:05Guys, you gotta use sex to sell.
07:07Shin, it's a little kitten, not Penny's mother.
07:09The S-Dance will get people interested in anything.
07:12S-Dance, S-Dance, S...
07:16Oh, such a cute, clean puss.
07:18Bloody Nanako.
07:20Look guys, Edward has found his pillow.
07:24I wanna be that cat.
07:31Georgie, make me a cat, quick!
07:33I'm a Republican, not a wizard.
07:35I'll call you Little Rex, to honor my boyfriend who was fatally mauled.
07:39Nanako, look at the Rurubegas!
07:41I was able to buy for five Reichsburg at the deli down by the...
07:44Meet Little Rex. I'm trying to move forward.
07:48Who's our good little brat first?
07:50Yeah, he'll fill the hole in my heart.
07:52Oh, I know. He'll make you forget all about Rex's unsolved death.
08:00What will you pay us for the cat?
08:02Uh, a buck?
08:03It worked! It worked! It worked! It worked!
08:06What the hell?
08:07Forgot about the roommate.
08:13I think I'd rather eat some mice bones.
08:16Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Here's more!
08:23A brief satire of the Third Reich's occupation of France.
08:28What do the Treaty of Versailles and Mitzi grounding Shin for watching an R-rated movie have in common?
08:34Nothing. Well, other than causing people to become Nazis.
08:38Quit acting so dramatic. You brought this on yourself when you hacked my Netflix queue.
08:43So I rented a movie, big whoop.
08:45Big whoop? You watched a violent R-rated movie.
08:49Well, I thought it was Action Bastard.
08:52Shin, Inglorious Bastards is not something a child should be watching.
08:56Alright, but I still don't see what the big deal is. Let's roll out hemes.
09:07Pretty cool, huh?
09:09Can't you just pretend to be normal?
09:11I'm bored. I wanna watch Bastards again.
09:14I'm gonna hold my breath until you queue it up at the scalping scene.
09:20Not happening, Shin.
09:23Well, I avoided being a mom all morning.
09:26Guess I'm gonna have to actually play with these kids now.
09:30I'm Cathy Cow. I wanna play, but I don't know how.
09:33Will you teach me a fun game to play today?
09:36That cow has boobs.
09:38Don't corrupt this wholesome scene. They're udders, not boobs. Don't be obscene.
09:42They're bigger than yours.
09:45Fine, then. Go back to your pity party.
09:48I'll go back to my Nazi party.
09:50That's not funny.
09:52The Nazis were the bad guys.
09:56How about you play as Brad Pitt?
09:59Your harsh groundings have turned me evil.
10:01Alright, just get out of here.
10:03Okay, Fraulein.
10:04Really? You're leaving?
10:06Heil Hitler! Today Germany, tomorrow the world!
10:11Please stop.
10:13I should really cancel Netflix.
10:17We have reason to believe this woman is hiding a Jew girl.
10:22She looks Jewish herself.
10:25What will the Fuhrer say?
10:27Go away.
10:28I was going to ask you for a glass of milk, but with such small boobs, I doubt that is possible.
10:33Knock this off right now, Shin. This game is creeping me out.
10:37Silence! My name is not Shin.
10:39I am Colonel Hans Panda, and I work for the SS.
10:43If I unground you, will you stop this crowd?
10:45No! It is too late to bargain.
10:50Detective Panda here.
10:52Yes, mein Führer. One tall, flat-chested Jew with bad hair.
10:56Oh, loud voice. Big butt, no friends. I'm already on it.
11:00Okay, love you too.
11:02I just got off the phone with Mr. Hitler, and he has ordered me to gas you.
11:06Enough, Shin! I'm calling Dad.
11:09I have shot him.
11:11Too bad for you. I hear he was a quadruple agent. Now you'll be shot.
11:17You play mind games. Here's one. You are a man.
11:21Very cute. Ha ha.
11:23For the last time, I'm not a man!
11:25My mind game is back!
11:27Fine. You want to play war spy?
11:29Have I got some nice secrets for you, Detective Panda.
11:34Bet you can't fool me. You are in the resistance.
11:38No, I am a double agent.
11:40Oh, I see. Then we'll serve the Führer together.
11:49So, Detective, are you ready to play?
11:52The best deads will be here in minutes.
11:54She's showing a lot of leg.
11:57I am Marguerite.
11:59How about you and those boobies?
12:02No! I can't keep up the lie. I am a triple agent.
12:08These boobies are the property of Her Majesty's Secret Service.
12:12My real name is Margaret Blair, and I'm a British secret agent,
12:15posing as a French Nazi collaborator, posing as a French resistance fighter.
12:19So much for your detective skills.
12:22Oh, crap! She's a bastard!
12:25I will not let you hurt Hitler. He's a good guy.
12:28We've got to get Shin into a better school.
12:31Fraulein, I hereby declare you an enemy of the Third Reich.
12:34Please report to the nearest camp for processing and striped pajamas.
12:39Shin has gone off the deep end.
12:41We have ways of making you stink.
12:43No, please, sir. Don't fart on me.
12:46Seriously, don't fart on me.
12:48Or else I'll pull this trident out.
12:51Holy Holocaust, Fro! But wait, I have a gun, too.
13:01Well, this isn't it.
13:03Surrender, bastard!
13:05I'll never give up to you, Nazi!
13:08Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing!
13:15Mein arm!
13:17Bing! Bing! Bing!
13:22She pulled it on Frank!
13:25Bing! Bing! Bing!
13:29Surrender now!
13:31Oh man, Hitler's going to be mad.
13:35Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing! Bing!
13:43Bing! Bing!
13:44Bing! Bing!
13:45Hema, I'm going in!
13:47Bing! Bing! Bing!
13:48Going in!
13:49Bing! Bing! Bing!
13:52Pow! Bing!
13:53See you in hell, panda!
13:55Pow! Pow!
13:57Bing! Bing! Bing!
13:59Action movie roll!
14:01Ew! I saw my undies!
14:10The phrase you're looking for is,
14:12the shoe is on the other foot.
14:14Corporal Hema, prepare to board ze zeppelin!
14:17Ze hell! Ze hell!
14:19Yeah, yeah, just get on!
14:21Hold on tight! Ze zeppelin may explode when shot!
14:24Get back here!
14:29It seems the great hunter has become the hunted.
14:38Crap!
14:41You can run, but you can't hide from my scalping knife!
14:48Gotcha!
14:50Surrender!
14:52Shin?
14:54Colonel Panda?
14:56That room is a dead end.
15:05This is the part of the show where we're trying to build that trademark Tarantino tension.
15:10Of course, Shin-Chan writers lack the ability to write like that,
15:13so this crappy Samuel L. Jackson impersonation will have to do.
15:17Colonel Panda,
15:19you're as stupid as your namesake bear.
15:24Die, Nazi!
15:25Bang! Bang! Bang!
15:32Weirdo.
15:33Freak.
15:34Nice rat, though.
15:39Talk about a good poop job.
15:44Huh?
15:47I have to stop playing games with Shin.
15:49That's like the fifth time I've been caught outside in some weird costume.
15:54So, do you at least still have the movie so I can watch it?
15:57Yeah.
15:58Here's more!
16:05You've been very stupid!
16:09Gotta hurry! It's my first date in six years!
16:12If I didn't answer that collect call myself,
16:14I wouldn't have believed Anderson would set me up with Doyle's hot friend.
16:17I just hope showing up five hours early doesn't look too desperate.
16:22I'm falling!
16:23I can't return a dress with street schmutz on it.
16:26And if I can't return my first date dress, how will I buy my slutty or second date dress?
16:30No dress means no sex!
16:32Then all those kegel exercises will have been for nothing!
16:35Wait! My kegels!
16:36That's it!
16:37Hold that cone. Squeeze it hard.
16:40Hold that cone or you'll never get a man and you'll die alone!
16:54Wow! A strong vagina really can do anything!
16:58Oh God! I'm not wearing underwear!
17:02Les Vagines!
17:04Oh! Let me help you!
17:07Sorry about that peep show.
17:10I'm on a first date. Gotta seem available.
17:15In Afghanistan, you lose your head for that!
17:18Yay, the albino titan Beasledrop,
17:20after being sent to the Plutonian portal in Afghanistan,
17:23was captured by Al-Qaeda and converted to terrorism.
17:26Kenta is dead.
17:28In Afghanistan, women shot for touching men or to be outside.
17:31You don't want to be on the show, do you?
17:33Thanks, bye!
17:34Attendee!
17:37Squeeze two, three! Squeeze two, three!
17:39I love recess month! It's great!
17:41Learning is fun!
17:42Well, I think Doyle should be safe now.
17:44What kind of rape was he getting in jail?
17:46I feel bad for setting up Ms. Katz,
17:48but it was the only way I could save Doyle's ass.
17:50Help! Anyone! Even Anderson!
17:52Why?
17:53I was too scared to go on my date!
17:55This giant Afghanistani, it's chasing me!
17:57I think he's one of those woody-a-columns,
17:59you know, with the camels in the dirt!
18:00Terrorist?
18:01Huh?
18:02Whoa!
18:03He's a killer! He's got a thick accent!
18:05I don't know what Arabic sounds like, but it must be that!
18:08You're sure he's a terrorist?
18:09Did he have a bomb or at least a beard?
18:11We gotta build a wall around the school,
18:13but we don't have bricks!
18:14We'll have to use the children!
18:15Relax!
18:16Georgie will save us all!
18:18Why me?
18:20You said you wouldn't puss out on terrorists like Obama!
18:23You said you'd kill them all,
18:24then torch their families to make them love freedom!
18:27And I thought you were all talk!
18:29Uh, crap.
18:33Heads of terrorists, get ready to be pounded!
18:35Go on, Georgie, put the American in American school!
18:42Salaam!
18:43Oh, you parley like mountain cave friends, so tall and gray!
18:47I look for La Femme run in there.
18:49If you present her me, I present you to Osama.
18:51You would like this, I think, no?
18:54Oh, maybe you want dessert instead?
18:56Yellow cake I have in suitcase?
18:58This is my moment, but I'm freezing up!
19:00I don't want to die unelected!
19:05Oh, hi!
19:06I have Hans Grahn, so I'm big in ze bed!
19:09See?
19:10That's the guy!
19:11He'll kill us all!
19:12No!
19:13Sorry I'm late!
19:14The show can start now!
19:16These kids is gonna die!
19:17Zeldor!
19:18Zeldor!
19:19Zeldor!
19:20Zeldor!
19:21Zeldor!
19:22Zeldor!
19:23I mean, she!
19:24He knows you?
19:26Whoa!
19:27Didn't think I'd see him alive again!
19:29Did you harbor him?
19:30Mmm, don't know that slang.
19:32We did some ass-walking together.
19:34Is that harboring?
19:35You did what with your butts?
19:37I don't know why, but that sounds fun to me.
19:38Do you give lessons?
19:39Yeah, sure.
19:40I point at woman you help me have.
19:43That one!
19:44Sounds panties.
19:45Tell her I am good man, not so scary.
19:48They think I am terrorist.
19:50Oh, relax, guys.
19:51He only went to that terrorist cave because we sent him there.
19:54He's just a harmless French crazy person.
19:57French?
19:58He just says those things because he's French?
20:00Why does cats get a hot Frenchman?
20:02There go my nipple boners.
20:03He doesn't want to blow me up?
20:05He likes me?
20:07For two years I have make many liquid dreams
20:10of magnifique woman très flexible
20:12who does not smell of anise de goat.
20:15On most of times I would make waking a vacuum goat.
20:18Quelle ironie!
20:19Yet still I fantasize of dark-haired beauty
20:21and pray she does not wear a burka like Afghan woman or ninja.
20:26Oh, and it comes true!
20:28I will pay any price for her.
20:30Well, it's a good thing you're loaded.
20:32You remember how you're so rich?
20:35Not a poor couch surfer?
20:36He's rich.
20:38Stop squeezing me.
20:39My nipples are semi-hard again.
20:41If I had a rich guy, I could buy a man to hit me.
20:43Oui, this holds truth.
20:44Man with long gray beard and white turban hat
20:47give many francs
20:48and promise one 72-year-old virgin.
20:52If I make boom-boom in my undies.
20:54I make boom-boom in my undies.
20:56No big deal once you get used to the squishy feeling.
20:59Oh, great.
21:00Another attack foiled on Obama's watch.
21:02Shin, you shouldn't go around introducing
21:04wealthy French fried freaks to Miss Kat.
21:06Some people had different plans for her.
21:08Some boyfriends are locked up
21:09and some girlfriends made a deal
21:10and some people need to put out for some parolee friends.
21:12So my ass was gonna get it instead of Doyle's?
21:15Bon, vous avez le plaisir avec mon derrière.
21:17Mangez mon cou.
21:18That's how the French say,
21:19I don't mind you're so ugly.
21:21Oh, you don't say.
21:23Oh, my.
21:24Don't fool yourself.
21:25Shin doesn't know French.
21:26I meet suited man with sunglasses
21:28hiding bushes in Waziristan.
21:30Tell of superwoman in Japanese American school.
21:33This woman have such thighs could kill a man.
21:35I am pleased to meet kinky muscle.
21:37Have good day.
21:38He said that even though you have a mustache,
21:40he thinks you're hot for some reason.
21:47I knew I was purposely saving myself for someone.
21:54Merci.
21:55I cherish the touch of sweaty wrinkled hands.
21:57Now more skin.
22:00There goes Doyle's butthole.
22:02Unless you want a date.
22:03Is he on a watch list?
22:05So you can't understand me?
22:07Because I think I like it that way.
22:09Let's ditch Shin, okay?
22:10Shin, very great.
22:11Always keep on shoulder for safe keeping.
22:13I'm really rusty when it comes to men.
22:14Snack time.
22:15Miss Polly said I wasn't ready for her inch,
22:17so I had to practice on bitch face instead.
22:19I remember I said nipples too, but they...
22:21That, dear friends, is how you set up an ass walker with a loser.
22:25You can get rich from ass walking?
22:27How? Your pimp takes so much.
22:29I just made that part up about him being loaded
22:31because I didn't think Katzy'd want a date
22:33a broke ass ass walker.
22:34You're a broke ass?
22:37Oh, sacre le!
22:38Her body's just broke.
22:40A professional ass walker?
22:42That's much worse than a popcorn salesman.
22:44Now I'm just bored.
22:45What do I do with that unconscious femme no panties?
22:48She said even though Katzy's so heavy,
22:50he still wants to touch her.
22:51Ah, screw it.
22:52Who cares?
22:53So what if you're not rich?
22:54I'll save a fortune on diesel batteries.
22:56Pardon?
22:57Oh, très bien!
22:59I see by your rouge face you are ready for the sex
23:01or you have drunken too much of the wine.
23:06Come to the house of Yuka tonight
23:07and we shall dine on goat and dance the horizontal can-can.
23:11A blue turd?
23:12So long, dildo!
23:15Is Yuka his wife?
23:17She's my fiber allergic neighbor.
23:19He lives on her couch.
23:21Oh, a man who lives right there on a couch.
23:24Then we won't have to go anywhere once things get hot.
23:28A man!
23:29Oh, I have a man! I have a man!
23:31So, shit, you're certain that this frog
23:33isn't a radical Islamo-fascist?
23:35No, I guess he could be.
23:37What can happen when you're in a cave for two years and crazy?
23:48My brain!
24:07But then I close my eyes and try to smile.
24:10I know things are bad and getting worse.
24:13But after all this, I can rest a while.
24:17And then I'll party! Party!
24:19Party! Party! Join us! Join us!
24:24Shake your day away and you can
24:25party! Party! Join us! Join us!
24:30Shake your blues away!
24:34This party's shaking and it ain't just shaking here I see that smile you're grinning ear to ear
24:45Sing this song and you should really sing it clear Just sing along with us
24:53Party, party, join us, join us Party, party, join us, join us
24:56Party, party, join us, join us Shake your day away and you can
24:59Party, party!
25:02Party!
25:05Party, party!