Punjabi movie funny clip
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00:00Sir, Jail Minister's wife has come to meet you.
00:04Tulsidas, you are my...
00:07What?
00:08What are you looking at?
00:09Bring her inside.
00:11Here she is.
00:12Welcome, welcome.
00:13Hello, Manavdeep.
00:14She is my colleague, Mani.
00:15Hello.
00:16Mani.
00:17She is very short.
00:20Just kidding.
00:21Sit down, sit down, please.
00:24Order.
00:26Order.
00:27Order.
00:28Order.
00:29Order.
00:30Did you get a call from your uncle's office?
00:32No, I didn't.
00:33Then who are you to stop me?
00:35I mean, who can stop a journalist?
00:38Order.
00:39Call the General and Taseem, quickly.
00:41Then we'll start the interview.
00:43What's the hurry?
00:45I'll call them.
00:46But first, let them dress up.
00:48What's the need to dress up?
00:49We're here to interview for the newspaper.
00:51No one's here to interview them.
00:53You're here to interview them.
00:55Next time, they'll go on their own.
00:57They don't want to go on their own.
00:58We want to go on our own.
01:02Actually,
01:03the humor of journalists
01:05makes people understand.
01:07This is the first time you've come to us.
01:09It's our duty to serve you.
01:11To make you happy.
01:12Tell me, Tulsidas.
01:13Yes, sir.
01:14Why did you bring hot jalebis
01:16from so far away?
01:19It won't take long.
01:20Please order from the nearest shop.
01:22The nearest shop doesn't bother us.
01:24We used to order food for 5-7 days a week.
01:27Now, they think we're beggars.
01:29Tulsidas.
01:30Yes.
01:31What's wrong with you girls?
01:32You don't even take my name.
01:33Come on.
01:34Listen.
01:35Yes, sir.
01:36I'll bring barfi and biscuits from the parlour.
01:38It's not parlour.
01:39It's Jee.
01:40Jee?
01:41Don't you ever tell your father?
01:42We don't need a parlour.
01:44We just need money.
01:46Even if it's a loan.
01:48Tulsidas.
01:49Yes, sir.
01:50Take it easy.
01:51The jalebis won't get cold.
01:53Yes, sir.
01:55Until the jalebis come,
01:57I won't let you go to jail.
01:58What?
01:59I mean, I won't let you go to jail.
02:03Come on.
02:04Let me show you
02:05the jail of Basi Pathana.
02:07This is the historical place
02:09where Shaheed-e-Azam Sardar Bhagat Singh
02:11and Sardar Udham Singh used to sit.
02:13Sir, I've done an MA in history.
02:15And as far as I know,
02:16both the Shaheeds never went to jail.
02:19Biba, it's possible
02:20that he was left out of his studies.
02:23I'll tell you what's inside.
02:25The Englishmen, the whites,
02:27they were very stubborn.
02:29They were always afraid of one thing.
02:32If their friends find out
02:34that they've been in jail for two months,
02:36they can get them released at any time.
02:39That's why they'd tell it somewhere else
02:41and keep it somewhere else.
02:42Sir, you're proving the students of history wrong.
02:45Really?
02:46Does that mean the government
02:48has been lying to me?
02:50I made a special request
02:51for my transfer to this jail.
02:52I asked them to cut my salary by Rs. 5000.
02:54But Jailor Jalawar Singh Jawal
02:56will serve in the jail of the Shaheeds.
02:59Mr. Jawal, your thoughts are very good.
03:02But I feel sorry for your I.Q.
03:04I feel sorry for the prisoners
03:06whom I've been serving
03:08for the past 19 years.
03:10Now you'll make us meet the same people
03:12at the jail.
03:13Yes, we will.
03:14Why wouldn't we?
03:15But before that,
03:16the jalebis that we ordered,
03:17we'll eat them first.
03:18Let's go.
03:25That's our car.
03:26That's the thief.
03:27Let's go.
03:28Hurry up.
03:29Stop.
03:33Stop.
03:36Stop, Uncle.
03:37Stop.
03:38That's the jeep guy.
03:43We're here.
03:45Charnayal.
03:46We were here.
03:47He must be at Baljeet.
03:49But I think
03:50the jeep is more important than the house.
03:52Oh, please.
03:54If we get caught,
03:55I'll take the girl from Pujona on my own.
03:57I'll steal the jeep on my own.
03:59Otherwise, Buggu will say,
04:01I lost my mother.
04:02My father has started cutting people's organs.
04:04Shut up and sit.
04:05Nothing will happen to you.
04:06Let's go.
04:11There's no salt in the buttermilk.
04:12There's no sugar in the tea.
04:13Ask him to add some more sugar.
04:15We're running out of time.
04:16Let's go find Brother-in-law first.
04:17Until we find Brother-in-law,
04:18we won't have tea.
04:19No.
04:24Brother-in-law.
04:36Just one jalebi.
04:37I don't eat a lot of sweets.
04:39What do you eat a lot?
04:40We'll order that.
04:42Actually, we're on a diet.
04:44That's why we don't eat.
04:45On a diet?
04:46Yes.
04:47Is this your age to be on a diet?
04:49Eat sweets.
04:50Be strong.
04:51You'll get married tomorrow.
04:52You'll have kids.
04:53For your kind information,
04:55you don't get kids by eating sweets.
04:57I know that.
04:58You get kids by eating sweets.
04:59Mr. Joel,
05:00how many times have you said this?
05:01Please.
05:03Call General Taseem.
05:05Sure.
05:06Why not?
05:07Excuse me.
05:08Excuse me.
05:10Hello.
05:11JJJ speaking.
05:12Jai Hind, sir.
05:13Sir, I was thirsty.
05:15I called Taseem.
05:17General is with him, sir.
05:20Why didn't you tell me?
05:21Have you ever been on a diet?
05:23I already knew
05:25that these two fish are in jail.
05:28Sir, if you knew,
05:29you should have told me.
05:31I'm starving here.
05:32Bahadur Singh,
05:33we'll complain later.
05:35Try to understand.
05:36Okay, sir.
05:37Just bring these two fish here
05:39safely.
05:41Sir,
05:42we don't want to eat fish.
05:43Just call them here.
05:45Wait a minute.
05:47What are you doing, sir?
05:49What can we do?
05:50We have to do something.
05:52We can't just hang around.
05:56Sir, uncle told me.
06:00Who did uncle tell?
06:01Not you, sir.
06:02I told the neighbors.
06:03Am I a thief?
06:05No, sir.
06:06Uncle told me.
06:09You were a kid too.
06:10Are you going to let him go
06:11or are you going to catch him?
06:12Let's go.
06:13Come on.
06:14Let's go.
06:20He's going that way.
06:22Stop him.
06:25Stop him.
06:27Stop him.
06:29He's going that way.
06:34Why did you stop him?
06:35Get out.
06:36Get out.
06:37Let me go.
06:38Get in.
06:39Get out of the way.
06:40We want to catch the thief.
06:44Why do you want to catch him, brother?
06:46We are policemen.
06:50These days,
06:51there are a lot of fake policemen.
06:54Show me your I-card.
06:55I-card?
07:05I-card is fine.
07:07Thank you.
07:08Now,
07:09can you show me your I-card?
07:11But there are no I-cards in the newspapers.
07:14We are talking about me.
07:16You have an I-card, right?
07:17Yes.
07:18Here,
07:19I'll show you now.
07:20Show me.
07:21I-card.
07:23I think
07:24the kids went to school by mistake.
07:27Okay, okay.
07:28Don't waste our time.
07:29Let us go.
07:31How can we let you go?
07:33Who knows?
07:34We might be fake policemen.
07:36We believe
07:37that you are real policemen.
07:38Let us go now.
07:39One policeman
07:40shouldn't know about the other policeman.
07:42Look,
07:43this is our relationship.
07:44It's written in our fate.
07:46We have to check the I-card.
07:47Blind faith can kill a person.
07:49Yes.
07:50I'll send you the I-card
07:51after I get it checked.
07:53But we don't have to send Chhote Bheem home.
07:55Sir is very strict.
07:57He doesn't let anyone
07:58who doesn't check
07:59his house's address
08:00enter the bedroom.
08:03Mr. Johal,
08:04we want to report to our office.
08:06Please call both of them.
08:08Mr. Nadeem,
08:10I want to take your advice.
08:12I have a distant cousin.
08:15He has a son-in-law.
08:17I don't know if it's a boy
08:18or a girl.
08:20Plus,
08:21if you do it,
08:22maybe he'll do it too.
08:23He'll do his B.A.
08:24in three years.
08:25I'm thinking
08:27that if he gets
08:28a post-graduation in journalism,
08:30he'll make you a reporter.
08:32What do you think?
08:33I don't know
08:34when this girl will do her B.A.
08:36I don't know
08:37when she'll do journalism.
08:38I don't know
08:39when she'll become a reporter.
08:40You have two great reporters
08:41sitting in front of you.
08:43Don't you know anything
08:44about them?
08:45Mr. Johal,
08:46if you don't call them
08:47in five minutes,
08:49I'll call uncle.
08:51Okay.
08:53If you had explained it to me
08:54with so much love,
08:55I would have arranged
08:56for their meeting.
08:57Amazing.
08:58I'll call them right now.
09:01Sorry.
09:03Mr. Ranjit Singh,
09:05what will we do
09:06if she gets a real uniform?
09:08I already know
09:09what to do.
09:10You think about yourself.
09:12Can I sit next to you?
09:13Yes.
09:14Sir is here.
09:17The girls are
09:18on their knees now.
09:19I don't understand
09:20what to do.
09:21Sir,
09:22talk to them
09:23and give them time
09:24so that the prisoners
09:25will also come.
09:26Didn't Tulsidas
09:27tell you anything?
09:28If there's a limit
09:29to beating up
09:30a PPS officer,
09:31he's beaten up
09:32a lot of people.
09:33Sir,
09:34I think
09:35you should
09:36convince the girls.
09:37I don't have
09:38the confidence
09:39to convince them.
09:40I don't understand
09:41where to start
09:42from now on.
09:44I'm in so much trouble.
09:47I don't know
09:48when I'll get out of it.
09:51Tulsidas.
09:52Yes, sir.
09:55The five prisoners
09:56in the murder case
09:57last month
09:59were sentenced
10:00to two years
10:01in jail.
10:03That's it?
10:06That's it.
10:08The girls
10:09told us
10:10to send them
10:11to jail.
10:12They didn't tell us
10:13to send them
10:14to the jail
10:15where they'll be released.
10:31I see.
10:32You're the general
10:34and you're Tarsim.
10:37Tell me,
10:39how do you feel
10:40when you're being released
10:41from jail?
10:43How do you feel?
10:46Hey, Bibi.
10:48Is this a new third degree?
10:50No, no.
10:51You're really being released.
10:53The government
10:54has forgiven you
10:55for your behavior.
10:57How do you feel?
10:58Feel?
11:00The government
11:01has gone mad.
11:03This is how I feel.
11:05I've been here
11:06for 14 years.
11:0714 years.
11:09You're mistaken.
11:11You haven't been here
11:12for 14 years.
11:14The MLA here
11:15is his uncle.
11:17He's the one
11:18who forgave you
11:19for the rest of the time.
11:20What day is it today?
11:2113th April.
11:2313th April.
11:24And you're telling us
11:25to go to jail
11:26as if
11:27it's April Fool's Day.
11:30Hey, Bibi.
11:32If the feeling
11:33of being in jail
11:34makes you feel like a fool,
11:37you tell me,
11:38how can we
11:39spend 14 years here?
11:40You're mistaken.
11:41You're being punished.
11:43You'll get us
11:44hanged.
11:45We're not spending
11:4614 years here.
11:48Which 14 years?
11:50You tell me,
11:51which law says
11:52that two kilos of cream
11:53and a slap
11:54is 14 years?
11:56Yes.
12:03These ignorant people
12:04have put a mark
12:05on their faces
12:06and the government
12:07is giving them
12:08such good treatment.
12:09Let's go to uncle.
12:10I'll tell him.
12:12Hey,
12:13why did you slap the girl?
12:15We killed her
12:16with so much difficulty
12:17and she slapped us.
12:19She's the MLA's niece.
12:21Maybe there's some truth
12:22in what she said.
12:23There's truth.
12:24Did you get what she said?
12:25Tell me,
12:26in which country
12:27does the government
12:28forgive the punishment
12:29of murder in a month?
12:30These leaders
12:31need murderers
12:32like us
12:33who can do anything.
12:35Maybe that MLA
12:36must have
12:37made a mistake
12:38and forgave us.
12:45Tomorrow,
12:46you'll be in trouble.
12:47You'll be in trouble.
12:49Listen,
12:51it's better
12:52than rotting in jail
12:53that we
12:54remain
12:55as MLA's henchmen.
12:56That's fine.
12:58But what about
12:59the girl who slapped us?
13:00What if she had
13:01asked her uncle
13:02to cancel our apology?
13:06Man,
13:08she didn't get hurt
13:09by murder
13:10but by a slap.
13:14Slap?
13:15Yes.
13:16How's that possible?
13:18These two
13:19are so innocent
13:20that they wake up
13:21early in the morning
13:22to guard their seniors.
13:23How can they slap
13:24their seniors
13:25in jail?
13:26She's lying.
13:27Look at her.
13:28She has a scar on her face.
13:29Oh, no.
13:31Mr. Naveeb,
13:32please don't tell
13:33your uncle about this.
13:34He'll get angry
13:35when he sees
13:36another girl's scar.
13:37What?
13:38Oh, yes.
13:39Mr. Malalia,
13:40it's not their fault.
13:41It's all Salman Khan's fault.
13:43How is that possible?
13:44Once the journalists
13:45got caught,
13:46all the scoundrels
13:47started to get angry.
13:48Sir,
13:49the jail minister is here.
13:51Sir,
13:52I don't have time
13:53to listen to another story.
13:55It's too late.
14:10Come here.
14:11Yes, sir.
14:12Open the door
14:13quickly.
14:14The seniors are waiting
14:15for you to open the door.
14:16They are.
14:17Sir,
14:18it's good
14:19that you came here
14:20in a red car.
14:21It's the same trend
14:22in the political market.
14:23I know about the rail market.
14:24I was going to deliver the package
14:25in a red car.
14:26Otherwise,
14:27I would have brought it.
14:28Oh, no.
14:29If the opposition
14:30finds out about this,
14:31they'll think
14:32that you're working
14:33in a government car.
14:34Please explain
14:35to sister-in-law.
14:36I don't think
14:37we can explain
14:38to her
14:39because she's
14:40the biggest opposition.
14:41Let's go, sir.
14:42I'm afraid of death.
14:44And death is waiting for me.
14:46Tulsidas.
14:47Yes, sir.
14:48Send the prisoners
14:49to the gate immediately.
14:50And gather the rest
14:51in the barracks.
14:52Yes, sir.
14:53And the minister too.
14:54It's getting late.
14:57Jai Hind, sir.
14:58Long live India.
14:59Happy Vaisakhi Day.
15:00Happy Vaisakhi Day
15:01to you too, Mr. Jalal Singh.
15:02Did you see
15:03the two men
15:04whom you recommended
15:05to release here?
15:06Are they happy now?
15:07Yes, sir.
15:08They're happy.
15:09But they don't look happy.
15:10Actually, sir,
15:11my love for the prisoners
15:12whom you're releasing
15:13is so strong
15:14that I don't know
15:15how to express it
15:16in words.
15:17I'm so happy
15:18that they're leaving today.
15:19That's why I'm a little sad.
15:20Otherwise,
15:21it's nothing special.
15:22How long will you be sad?
15:23Think of the prisoners
15:24as your daughters.
15:25All daughters
15:26have to leave one day.
15:27Sir,
15:28all daughters have to leave
15:29one day.
15:30Then one day
15:31the world will be empty.
15:32If they're going to survive,
15:33they'll survive
15:34for a few more years.
15:35If they're so sad,
15:36they'll cancel their release.
15:37Keep your daughters
15:38with you.
15:39Sir, you're talking
15:40about daughters.
15:41The daughters' father
15:42doesn't know
15:43if they'll stay
15:44with you till evening.
15:45What do you mean?
15:46Welcome.
15:47Come.
15:51Sir,
15:52I don't know
15:53when I welcomed you.
15:54Greetings, sir.
15:55Greetings.
15:56How are you?
15:57Is there any problem?
15:58There's only one problem.
15:59After drinking hot water,
16:00everyone's insides are cold.
16:01Please install
16:02a water cooler.
16:03But we installed
16:04a cooler last year.
16:05That was air-conditioned, sir.
16:06The air must be cold.
16:07Yes.
16:08Then give them
16:09hot water
16:10and make them sit.
16:11Let the water cool down.
16:12I'll note it down.
16:13I'll note it down.
16:14I'm going to
16:15the widow's ashram.
16:16We'll start the function
16:17as soon as possible.
16:18Sir,
16:19we can't start
16:20the function so soon.
16:21Why?
16:22Because they haven't
16:23discussed their feelings
16:24with you yet.
16:25They must be
16:26writing poems
16:27like their brothers-in-law.
16:28Yes.
16:29I mean,
16:30if they don't
16:31talk about their feelings,
16:32they'll leave.
16:33So, sir,
16:34please understand
16:35our helplessness.
16:36Uncle!
16:39If I'm your distant uncle,
16:40it means
16:41you should stay away
16:42and talk to me.
16:43Come.
16:45How was the interview?
16:46That's what I wanted to tell you.
16:47I've already told them
16:49that our prisoners
16:50get caught at times.
16:51Please forgive them.
16:52Forgive them?
16:53How can I forgive them?
16:54That's rude.
16:56Naveeb,
16:57people get caught on their own.
16:58Prisoners
16:59get irritated easily.
17:00Before they get caught,
17:01I'll go and calm them down.
17:02Okay,
17:03you'll leave
17:04once you're released, right?
17:05Yes.
17:06If you're not released,
17:07you'll leave
17:08once you see our devastation.
17:09What?
17:10Oh, sorry.
17:11I thought you were Tulsidas.
17:12You were supposed to
17:13invite the public
17:14but you didn't.
17:15I had other plans.
17:16I wanted to sing a song.
17:17It's still going on.
17:18You came 15 minutes early.
17:19Really?
17:25That's enough.
17:28My fellow prisoners,
17:31first of all,
17:32I want to congratulate you
17:33on your release.
17:35Congratulations.
17:37The Jailor told me
17:38that you all
17:39want to share
17:40your feelings with me.
17:42Speak up.
17:45Mr. Minister!
17:46Mr. Minister!
17:48Wait a minute.
17:49Let him come.
17:51Speak up.
17:53Mr. Minister,
17:54we're ashamed of our mistakes.
17:56Please forgive us.
17:58Look,
17:59a human being
18:00is a puppet of mistakes.
18:01If you want to leave,
18:02you'll have to leave.
18:04You made a mistake.
18:05I respect that.
18:08Mr. Minister,
18:09Mr. Minister,
18:10won't you cancel
18:11your release today?
18:13Why would I cancel it?
18:14In fact,
18:15I'll release you
18:16with my own money.
18:17So that the other prisoners
18:18in the Jail can be encouraged.
18:20If the government
18:21does a good job
18:22and releases two prisoners
18:23from the Jail today,
18:25it can release four tomorrow.
18:37Mr. Minister!
18:39Long live the Minister!
18:40Mr. Minister!
18:41Long live the Minister!
18:42Enough!
18:43Enough!
18:44That's enough.
18:45Come on.
18:47You started the function,
18:48but you didn't even wait
18:49for the prisoners
18:50you found.
18:51Sir,
18:52I don't think
18:53I'll get a promotion.
18:54But I don't have
18:55a lockdown.
18:57Jai Hind, sir.
18:58Thank God you're here.
18:59Sir,
19:00where are the two prisoners?
19:01That's my question.
19:02Where are they?
19:03Sir,
19:04we saved them
19:05from the police
19:06and sent them here.
19:07Then where did they go?
19:08Sir,
19:09we stopped for a while.
19:10We needed a necklace
19:11for my brother-in-law's wedding.
19:13Why didn't you come here
19:14and kill your brother-in-law
19:15and get him a necklace?
19:16What's up, Jailor?
19:17Sir,
19:19I asked for a necklace for you.
19:20It's not that bad.
19:21If you were late,
19:22I'd have sent a courier
19:23to your house.
19:25Come on.
19:26Start the function.
19:27Sir,
19:29if you want a small gift,
19:30you can do it at home.
19:31You can bring a doll
19:32and give it to me.
19:33Who do you think
19:34you are?
19:35I've sent a few dolls
19:36to your house
19:37and they got stuck
19:38in my feet.
19:39That means
19:40you're against
19:41the Grow Green Movement.
19:42What's this?
19:43Sir,
19:44this is also
19:45a crime.
19:46How can you
19:47give a statement
19:48without thinking?
19:49Do this.
19:50Say a few things
19:51about the dolls.
19:52And take the old man
19:53with you.
19:54Oh, okay.
19:55I've heard
19:56that you have to
19:57do what you have to
19:58but I've found out
19:59that you have to
20:00do what you have to.
20:01Come on.
20:02Get me a doll.
20:03Bahadur Singh.
20:04Sir.
20:05Get me a doll.
20:06I think
20:07I've seen one
20:08in jail.
20:09Get me
20:10an old one.
20:11Just get me a doll.
20:12As soon as you can.
20:15Let's see.
20:16Move aside.
20:18Did you find it?
20:20Sir,
20:21I've brought the doll.
20:23Where did you get it from?
20:24I've never seen it
20:25in jail.
20:26Sir,
20:27I found it
20:28on your desk
20:29in your office.
20:30You fool.
20:31It's fake.
20:32It's made of plastic.
20:33Sir,
20:34I know
20:35but I've brought it
20:36from the ground.
20:37He's putting make-up
20:38on his face
20:39and he's bringing it
20:40from the ground.
20:41Can't he smell it?
20:42Sir,
20:43I've brought it
20:44from Agarbatti.
20:45Shut up
20:46if anyone finds out
20:47that it's fake.
20:48Shut up.
20:49Get me a doll.
20:50Coming, sir.
20:51Get me a doll.
20:55Get me a doll.
20:56Get me a doll.
20:57Get me a doll.
20:58Do you want to
20:59make it bigger?
21:00Yes, sir.
21:02Oh, my God.
21:03My country's dolls.
21:04They smell good
21:05and you're
21:06spreading the smell
21:07of Agarbatti.
21:08Actually,
21:09when you were young,
21:10you loved dolls.
21:11Believe me,
21:12in the film
21:13Shaheed-e-Mahabat Boota Singh,
21:14I had seen
21:15that it was made
21:16of dolls.
21:17But unfortunately,
21:18it was made of men.
21:19Please, sir.
21:20Get me a doll.
21:21Come.
21:22We're getting late.
21:23We're getting late.
21:24Get me a doll, sir.
21:32Get me some water.
21:34Sir,
21:35there's no need
21:36for water
21:37for this doll.
21:38It's waterproof.
21:39But still,
21:40get me some water.
21:51My dear prisoners,
21:53I promise you one thing.
21:55The doll I brought today,
21:57even before its birthday,
21:59I'll release
22:01half of your prisoners.
22:03Then,
22:04we'll all die here.
22:05Let's start the function.
22:06Come on.
22:07Sir,
22:08I wanted to talk
22:09to you personally.
22:10What happened now?
22:11Sir,
22:12the prisoners we're releasing,
22:13I have a small request.
22:14Talk to me
22:15and see
22:16how nice it would be
22:17if they let us
22:18stay at Vaisakhi's place
22:19on the first of May,
22:20on Labor Day.
22:21Why is that?
22:22Both the villagers
22:23have their land
22:24with the crops
22:25on Labor Day.
22:26Jalal Singh,
22:27I don't do government work.
22:28Sir,
22:29think about it.
22:30How nice it would be
22:31if we could
22:32spend the night
22:33at our mother's place,
22:34and spend Diwali
22:35with sweets
22:36and girls
22:37with colorful dresses.
22:38Very good.
22:39Tomorrow,
22:40all the prisoners
22:41will come back
22:42after seeing the moon.
22:43Let's start the function.
22:44Sorry, sir.
22:45Actually,
22:46I think a lot
22:47about the prisoners.
22:48But they never
22:49think about me.