Frasier Season 5 Episode 24 Sweet Dreams
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00:00Well, that's it for today Seattle. This is Dr. Frasier Crane wishing you a good day and good mental health.
00:10Hi, Millie. First, I'm waiting for the food here.
00:14That is not amusing when you do it in the men's room. It's not amusing now.
00:18All ready then, bulldog?
00:20What are you two doing?
00:21We're recording an ad for a new sponsor. We only got a minute here, so scram, both of you.
00:26Oh, by the way, Ross, baby or no baby, your ass has never looked better.
00:30Shut up!
00:34How sick is that?
00:35Well, he's just being bulldog.
00:37Now that I liked hearing it.
00:41Hi, I'm Bulldog Briscoe.
00:43And I'm Gil Chesterton.
00:45When Bulldog and I are out on the town together...
00:48Whether it's opening night at the opera...
00:50Or rooting our mariners to victory...
00:53We always round out the evening the same way.
00:55With a nice relaxing cup of happy dreams tea.
01:01We're making some right now. How many lumps do you like, Gil?
01:04One, please.
01:06Ouch! Gets me every time.
01:10Happy dreams tea.
01:11One cup, you'll have happy dreams the whole night through.
01:16Yes! Perfect! One tea!
01:18Well, my ouch could be a bit more convincing.
01:21Ouch!
01:22We'll splice it in later.
01:26What the hell was that?
01:28It's the new stage manager's idea.
01:30He's getting some of the on-air talent to record commercials for the new sponsors.
01:34You're not disappointed he didn't ask you to do it, are you?
01:37Oh, yes, Ross. About as disappointed as I was when that hypnotist at the Christmas party...
01:41Picked them to come up on stage and groom each other like monkeys.
01:45Oh, yeah. You really lucked out at that party.
01:49He didn't make you do anything silly. No, sir.
01:53Ross!
01:56Oh, Daphne, what are you doing here?
01:58Hi, Daph.
01:59Dr. Craig's car's in the shop, so I'm a chauffeur for the day.
02:02It may take a while to get home. There's a rally on Pike Street holding up the traffic.
02:06Oh, what sort of rally?
02:08Apparently they're trying to save some old bookstore from being torn down.
02:11Not Hersh & Sons?
02:13Yeah, that's the one. Some developer wants to build a strip mall there.
02:17Oh, they can't do that. That's a Seattle landmark.
02:20My God, Mark Twain gave a reading there.
02:23Oh, yeah, I know that place.
02:25Used to have a boyfriend who liked to make out in the occult section.
02:31You know, frankly, I'm terribly upset about this.
02:34You know, I think we'll go down there and join that rally.
02:37Good for you, Frasier.
02:38I refuse to stand idly by while some fat cat bully rides roughshod over the little people.
02:44I don't want to go to a rally.
02:46Oh, tough luck. You're the chauffeur.
03:06This is actually rather exciting.
03:08I must say, I never thought you to be the protest type.
03:11Oh, on the contrary, Daphne.
03:13I was quite the activist in my college days.
03:16You know, there's nothing like throwing in with a fearless band of scruffy young rebels
03:19thumbing their noses at convention.
03:21So, did you go for the whole package, then?
03:23Long hair, bell-bottoms, beards?
03:25Oh, heavens, no, no.
03:27I did have a pair of psychedelic suspenders that raised an eyebrow or two.
03:31This seems good, don't you think?
03:33Yeah.
03:35Hello.
03:36Hello.
03:37Hey, this is great.
03:40Hey, look, everybody, it's Dr. Frasier Crane.
03:44Hi.
03:45Hi.
03:46Hello, good to see you.
03:48Dr. Crane, would you like to say a few words?
03:50Well, all right, I'll keep it simple.
03:53These strong people are called just to the barricades.
04:01This is sort of fun, isn't it?
04:04People, this is your final warning.
04:07Who do you suppose that is?
04:09The police, I think.
04:10Disperse now or we will take action.
04:14What do you suppose they mean by that?
04:16We're not going anywhere, are we?
04:18No!
04:20I don't think they're talking about a jail sort of thing here, do they?
04:22Who knows? It's exotic, isn't it?
04:24They're going to have to drag us out of here, aren't they?
04:27Yes!
04:29They don't actually drag people away anymore, do they?
04:32Because they're too afraid to arrest us, aren't they?
04:36Yes!
04:37Well, now you're just provoking them.
04:40All right, people, you have your warning.
04:44Oh, man.
04:46They weren't kidding.
04:48Well, there go the first lucky martyrs to our cause.
04:56You know, at the rate they're dragging people away,
04:59there'll be nobody left to protest.
05:01You know, Cathy, I'd better go get some reinforcements.
05:04Dr. Crane! Dr. Crane, where are you going?
05:08Solidarity, brothers!
05:29Oh, hello, Niles.
05:30Fraser, I hope you're free tonight.
05:32I just secured a table at the most exclusive new restaurant in Seattle.
05:36I'm sorry. Just not in the mood.
05:39At least hear me out.
05:40This place is the hottest new thing in fusion cuisine.
05:44Oh? What cuisines are being fused?
05:47Polynesian and Scandinavian.
05:50It's called Mahalo Valhalla.
05:54Well, perhaps there's a reason God put those two countries so far apart.
06:00I had my doubts, too, but my gourmet newsletter
06:03gave three and a half whisks to their coconut herring.
06:10Look, I'm sorry, Niles.
06:12Tonight's just a bad night.
06:15You see, Daphne's been hauled down to jail.
06:18Dad's down there trying to bail her out.
06:20What?
06:21Don't worry. They should be home any minute.
06:23It's just that she was down at that rally for Herschenson's bookstore.
06:29The worst part of it is I convinced her to go.
06:32When they started hauling people away,
06:36I chickened out and ran.
06:39You left her there?
06:41It's a thoroughly shameful performance.
06:45Although I did clear that privet hedge in front of Emerson.
06:48Although I did clear that privet hedge in front of Emerson's funeral home
06:51like a Kentucky show horse, but...
06:59What has happened to me, Niles?
07:02I used to be so courageous.
07:06To fight for things.
07:10When did I become so middle-aged?
07:13So timid?
07:15Don't be so hard on yourself.
07:17It's part of life. We all get a bit more cautious as we get older.
07:20Not me.
07:23God, it was only five years ago I packed up my whole life in Boston,
07:26moved across the country to start over.
07:30That took real courage.
07:31Now, the biggest risk I take is saying to Dad,
07:34Hey, let's go out to dinner. You pick the restaurant.
07:41Daphne. Daphne, it's so good to have you home safe and sound.
07:45Sod off.
07:47She's a little mad at you.
07:49Yes, thank you, Dad.
07:52Daphne, I am so sorry.
07:57I feel just terrible.
07:59As you should. You left me handcuffed and helpless.
08:02If you ever find yourself in that position again, be sure to call on me.
08:06For help.
08:09Thank you, Dr. Crane.
08:11Shame on you, Dr. Crane.
08:13Why can't you be more like Dr. Crane?
08:17I can't believe it took me six hours to get around.
08:20In my days, cops could count on a few perks, you know?
08:24No speeding tickets, get your friends out of jail fast.
08:27It's all good.
08:29I'm not a cop.
08:31I can't believe it took me six hours to get around.
08:34In my days, cops could count on a few perks, you know?
08:37No speeding tickets, get your friends out of jail fast.
08:40It's all gone to hell.
08:42Yes, well...
08:44Let's hope they never do away with that old jewel rail for grabs in the morgue policy.
08:52Well, there is no way I'm letting this dinner reservation go to waste.
08:55Frazier, last chance.
08:58Thanks anyway, Niles.
09:01You know, Niles, maybe I will come and get a bite with you, you know?
09:04Sitting around six hours in that station house.
09:07I could eat anything.
09:09Well, let's go then.
09:10Oh, good. I can't wait.
09:13Where are we going anyway?
09:15Oh, well...
09:18Hello, yes, I'd like to order a large pizza.
09:22What toppings?
09:24Just a second.
09:27Dad, what do you want on your pizza?
09:31Pepperoni!
09:32Pepperoni, please.
09:35Anyway, we've been fighting a lot, and she's never in the mood for sex anymore.
09:40I think she must be having an affair.
09:42Now, now, Patrick, let's not give in to paranoia.
09:46Just because your wife is avoiding sex lately doesn't mean she's being unfaithful.
09:52You said yourself you haven't been talking lately.
09:56Why don't you try reopening the lines of communication tonight
10:00by surprising her with a nice romantic dinner?
10:05Tonight's no good.
10:06She's working late on her boss's boat again.
10:13But tomorrow's okay.
10:14Thanks, Dr. Crane.
10:17You know, Ross, what do you say we turn things over to our eye-in-the-sky chopper, Dave,
10:23with the traffic report?
10:26Frazier, I want to introduce you to someone.
10:28This is our new station manager, Kenny Daly.
10:30Oh, it's a pleasure.
10:32Oh, no, no, no, it's my pleasure.
10:34I have to say, I'm just a huge fan.
10:39I only had this reaction once before.
10:41Did you ever hear of a radio station?
10:43I only had this reaction once before.
10:45Did you ever hear of Norman Mailer?
10:48Of course, the author.
10:50Oh, no, no, no, I'm talking about the drive-time guy who worked out of Tampa.
10:55Norman in the morning.
10:57So funny, you pray for traffic.
11:01Well, I'll try to catch him next time I'm in Tampa.
11:06In the morning.
11:09Well, I gotta run.
11:10Yes.
11:11It's been great meeting you.
11:12You too.
11:14Oh, I almost forgot.
11:16I got a call from the Happy Dreams tea people.
11:18They had a bunch of spots scheduled for your first hour,
11:21and you forgot to read them.
11:23Well, actually, I didn't forget.
11:24I had a look at the copy, and, well, I couldn't read it.
11:28Oh, why not?
11:30Well, just listen to this.
11:33Here.
11:34One cup of Happy Dreams tea,
11:36and you'll have happy dreams all night long.
11:39Well, fact is that dreams are a by-product of unresolved emotion.
11:43No tea can promise happy dreams.
11:47Oh, okay.
11:48I totally get that.
11:50Oh.
11:51Here's my problem.
11:53Our ad revenues are down, and they're a major new sponsor.
11:56I, uh, I just promised them that you'd read the ads this hour.
12:00Yes, but as a psychiatrist, I can't.
12:01You see, they're promising something that's impossible.
12:03Okay.
12:04Okay, now I understand.
12:07What if we just think of it more as a slogan?
12:09You see, but it's not a slogan.
12:11If I, as a doctor, read it, it sounds like medical advice.
12:17Okay.
12:18Now, totally get it.
12:23So instead of saying, this is Dr. Fraser Crane,
12:26just don't say doctor.
12:28Kenny, perhaps I'm not making myself clear here.
12:30Let's try this.
12:32I will never read this copy.
12:35Oh, this is the part of my job I really hate.
12:40You take a stand like that, and I totally respect it, by the way,
12:43and you force my hand.
12:46That's our biggest sponsor.
12:48So unless you're willing to go on the air right now and read that ad,
12:53I have to fire you.
12:57Ten seconds, Fraser.
13:00Well, didn't realize you felt so strongly about it.
13:05Guess I have no choice.
13:06Oh, thanks, Dr. Crane.
13:08Oh, what a relief.
13:20Hello, Seattle.
13:22The people who know me best
13:24will not be surprised by what I'm about to tell you.
13:27I am not a man who betrays his principles.
13:35I am not a man who misleads his listeners,
13:38and I am not a man who will shrink from a fight.
13:42Today I find myself in a fight over the content of my show,
13:46but rather than truckle to the forces of commercialism,
13:50I've decided to take a stand on principle,
13:53I've decided to take a stand on principle,
13:56even if it means...
14:00I'm not on the air, am I?
14:01No. You put on the best of, Crane.
14:05How much did I get out?
14:07Well, let's see.
14:09The people who know me best will not be surprised by what I'm about to tell you.
14:14I am not a man...
14:24Perfect.
14:32So they actually fired you?
14:34Yes.
14:36And I must say it feels good to take a stand like this.
14:41I feel like my old self again.
14:43Tell you one thing, I don't envy Kenny.
14:46Feeling the cold stares of the other employees?
14:49Because he's fired.
14:52Because he's fired the station's most popular personality?
14:56He fired Tootie the Story Lady, too.
15:01Very funny, Niles.
15:04God, who would have thought that getting fired can make one feel so alive?
15:11What do you want?
15:13Another staring contest, I suppose?
15:17Well, you picked the wrong day for that, boy-o.
15:27Take that!
15:30Oh, Granger, what are you doing home?
15:32Oh, well, Dad, brace yourself.
15:36The station fired me.
15:38So you'll be seeing me this time every day.
15:41Oh, no, that's terrible.
15:44I assume you mean the firing part.
15:47Well, yeah.
15:50So what happened?
15:52Well, simply put, they asked me to violate a principle I believe in, and I refused.
15:57Well, then I'm proud of you. What did they want you to do?
16:00Well, there's this product called Happy Dreams Tea.
16:03They wanted me to say that it gives people happy dreams.
16:06And?
16:09Well, that's it. I couldn't make a claim like that.
16:12Well, every commercial promises something they can't deliver. That's what makes it a commercial.
16:16Yes, Dad, that may be.
16:18It's like that cologne that's supposed to drive women wild.
16:21I used it all my life. I never had a single strange woman come on to me.
16:25Except for that year that I worked in Vice.
16:28Yes, I understand.
16:31But that wasn't about cologne, let me tell you.
16:33Yes, I understand.
16:36They were hookers.
16:37I realize that.
16:43Frazier?
16:45Don't be angry with me, but I do have one theory that I'd like to explore.
16:49Yes, Niles, I was wondering when you'd get around to that, so please, just allow me.
16:54I was so ashamed of my chickening out at the rally
16:59that I grabbed at the first fight that came my way.
17:03Of course, it turned out to be the wrong fight, and I needlessly lost my job.
17:07So if you follow that theory through to the end,
17:10this heady feeling of euphoria I'm experiencing right now
17:14is frankly nothing more than a deep-seated denial.
17:18So have you considered it?
17:20Not for a second!
17:28Oh, hello.
17:30Look, I know I must be the last person you want to see right now, but please listen.
17:34Since I fired you, I haven't been able to eat or sleep.
17:37Kenny, it's only been an hour and a half.
17:45Well, I'm a napper.
17:50I just came to tell you, I was wrong.
17:52All I've been able to think about was,
17:54I just fired a man who was willing to go to the mat for his principles.
17:57What does that say about my principles?
18:01Well, before I go on, have you had any job offers?
18:03He's had four.
18:04Dan, shut up.
18:05He hasn't.
18:06Shut up.
18:07I'm still technically available.
18:09Well, I'd like you to think about coming back to work tomorrow,
18:11because the first thing in the morning,
18:13I'm calling the Happy Dreams people and telling them
18:15you're uncomfortable with their ads.
18:17At KACL, the talent comes first.
18:21Well, what can I say but,
18:24see you tomorrow.
18:26Oh, this is so great.
18:28I'm so relieved.
18:29You know what?
18:30Can I buy a beer just to show we have no hard feelings?
18:33I would love that,
18:34as long as I don't have to endorse it afterward.
18:36Oh.
18:37Ouch.
18:40I guess I had that one coming.
18:42Nice meeting you.
18:43See ya.
18:44Bye-bye.
18:47Good afternoon, Seattle.
18:49This is Dr. Frazier Crane,
18:51and I would like to begin today by apologizing
18:55for my abrupt departure from the airwaves yesterday.
18:58You see,
19:00I was embroiled in a conflict with the management.
19:05I'm happy to report that it has been resolved,
19:09thanks to the efforts of our new station manager,
19:12a courageous and principled young man,
19:14Ken Daly.
19:16I won't bore you with all the details,
19:18but suffice it to say,
19:19he took on the big guys
19:22and won.
19:26Anyway,
19:28I apologize for our brief interruption yesterday,
19:31and I assure you that today's will be even briefer.
19:36Ross, let's go to commercial.
19:41Kenny!
19:42Kenny, what's going on?
19:43Actually, it's the darndest thing.
19:45I got fired.
19:47What?
19:48Well, how did that happen?
19:51Well, I told the sponsors you wouldn't be reading their ads.
19:54The next thing I know,
19:55I'm getting called into Mr. Martin's office in the Black Tower.
19:58I told them that sponsors are easier to replace than talent.
20:03He said I was easier to replace than anybody.
20:06Then he called me a pinhead and took my coke away.
20:13That's terrible.
20:15Oh, Kenny, I...
20:17I can't help feeling that this is all my fault.
20:20No, no, no. These things happen.
20:22And if I gotta get fired sticking up for someone,
20:24I'm just honored it was for you.
20:27At least now I'll have time to finish building that nursery in my new house.
20:30We're expecting.
20:34Oh, there's my wife now.
20:36She's gonna get a kick out of this coincidence.
20:38Me and her getting fired in the same week.
20:41May I?
20:42Yeah, of course.
20:45Well, we have got to get Kenny's job back.
20:48Well, how are we supposed to do that?
20:50Well, we'll just round up all the talent,
20:53go down to Mr. Martin and demand that he rehire Kenny.
20:57Mr. Martin owns the station.
21:00We can't give him an ultimatum.
21:02But it's not an ultimatum, Ross.
21:03We'll simply appeal to the man's sense of decency.
21:05You know, Kenny went to bat for me.
21:07We owe him at least that.
21:09You know, Kenny hasn't even asked for our help.
21:11If we know, he'll be fine.
21:13How do you like that?
21:15She's having twins.
21:20Heck of a time for me to lose my insurance, huh?
21:24Well, you guys take care.
21:41And together, I know that we can do this.
21:43The most important thing is to present a united front.
21:48What is the matter with you people?
21:51Isn't it obvious we're frightened?
21:53Of what?
21:54Of everything.
21:55We're in a building called the Black Tower.
21:58Those guards in the lobby must have been seven feet tall.
22:02And that metal detector thing we had to go through was really scary.
22:06It was even scarier finding out Gilbert's an anklet.
22:09All right, that's enough!
22:11Now get off the elevator, all of you.
22:13I'm ashamed of you.
22:15Intimidated by a building.
22:19We're here for Kenny.
22:21The man who wants to start KACL Daycare, Roz.
22:25The man who approved the extra airbrushing charges on your new publicity photos, Gil.
22:30And you, Tootie.
22:32Who was it that just doubled the storytime puppet budget?
22:36I know Kenny's a great guy.
22:39But I met Joe Martin once.
22:41He was a very scary man.
22:45With eyes as cold as a winter meadow.
22:49Oh, all right, Tootie!
22:53Oh, Mr. Martin.
22:55Hello.
22:56Do you have an appointment?
22:58Mr. Martin, my name is Dr. Fraser Crane.
23:01I am here with some of the other talent from KACL.
23:04My producer, Roz Doyle.
23:06Gil Chesterton, food critic.
23:08Bob Briscoe, sports.
23:09Tootie Feingold, the story lady.
23:11Ray Schmidt, the green grocer.
23:13And Miss Judy, arts and crafts.
23:17I'm sorry, Judy, I don't know your last name.
23:19I don't have time for this.
23:21I'm in the middle of a board meeting. Please.
23:23Yes, this will only take a moment, Mr. Martin.
23:25This morning, you fired Kenny Daly.
23:29Wonderful station manager.
23:31And a man of integrity.
23:33That is a very rare quality in this industry, Mr. Martin.
23:36I promise you, you'll fire all the Kenny Dalys.
23:38What are you left with? A bunch of sycophants and yes-men.
23:41Am I right?
23:42Yes!
23:43Yes, you're right.
23:47Now, it would be a great risk to hire Kenny back.
23:53But I'm here to tell you that a man that stops taking risks in life
23:57pays a very dear price indeed.
24:00I know where enough I speak.
24:04Now, I can see that I'm getting through to you,
24:07so let me just leave you with one last question.
24:13What kind of radio station do you want?
24:19You know, Dr. Crane,
24:22that is the exact question I've been asking myself all through that board meeting.
24:29As you know, our ratings are down.
24:32And the number crunchers in there think they can fix this thing
24:36by sucking up to our sponsors.
24:39That's not what I think.
24:41Bravo!
24:42Thanks to you, I'm going with my gut on this one.
24:46You bet you are!
24:47I'm going to march right in there and tell them that we're doing it my way.
24:51No more talk.
24:53Exactly! Action!
24:55No, no more talk radio.
24:58From this moment on, the station is all Latino music all the time.
25:06I beg your pardon?
25:07Thank you, Dr. Crane. I'm going back to my roots.
25:10But, uh, just a...
25:12I may have walked out of that meeting Joe Martin corporate sellout,
25:16but I'm walking back in
25:19Jose Martinez, risk taker!
25:29What the hell just happened?
25:31You just got us all fired!
25:33What did you say?
25:58Adiós.