• 2 months ago
Frasier Season 9 Episode 15 The Proposal

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TV
Transcript
00:00Are you sure you want to do this without Daphne? You know, when Lilith and I got engaged, she insisted on being involved with the ring selection process.
00:10I appreciate your concern, Frasier, but I want to surprise her.
00:14How about this one? It's nice and sparkly.
00:18That's an earring, Daphne.
00:20Oh, better put on my glasses.
00:24Nice. Prepare to relinquish your breath.
00:29Which one?
00:30Right there, next to the gaudy one.
00:35The gaudy one?
00:37All right, all right. Which one do you like?
00:40Something more along the lines of that one there with the feathered band.
00:44What do you think?
00:46I think it's a good thing I'm here to talk you out of it.
00:49I think I'm starting to regret bringing you along at all.
00:52Gentlemen, I'm sure we can find something that will bring you both a lifetime of happiness.
01:02Oh, no, they're not a couple.
01:06My son, Niles, is here to pick out an engagement ring for his girlfriend, Daphne.
01:11And Frasier, who's been married twice, just came along to help.
01:16I'm very sorry. I'll come back when you've had more time to look around.
01:23Where did that come from?
01:25Me? Really? To just assume something like that out of the blue?
01:31Latent.
01:35Well, you gotta admit, it wasn't such a big leap, given the situation.
01:39And just what is that supposed to...
01:44What?
01:45The jeweled serif has escaped her provenance now.
01:52I'm gonna go see if there's a line at the Orange Julius.
01:56I have several candidates, Niles, but before you turn up your nose at this...
02:00That's it. Right there. That's Daphne's ring.
02:04The very one I was going to show you.
02:07Stylish.
02:08Classic.
02:09Stunning.
02:11Daphne.
02:12Uh, excuse me, uh...
02:15I'd like to see that one, please.
02:17Excellent choice, sir.
02:19Do you know her ring size?
02:20Oh, even better.
02:21Her ring finger is exactly the same size as mine.
02:26Well, perhaps you should try this on, then.
02:35I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm a little nervous.
02:38I think it just hit me what this all means.
02:40Oh!
02:41What happened?
02:42Just my back. It's been acting up a bit the last week.
02:45Well, here, you want me to give you a hand up?
02:47No, no, no. Here, here. Here's the ring.
02:49I'll just stay down here for a moment.
02:52Does it fit?
02:54Here, let me help you.
02:55Oh, come on, come on.
02:57Oh, Niles.
03:00Frasier, it's perfect.
03:03You know, I always dreamed this would happen.
03:08No! Wait!
03:10They're not a couple!
03:15Oh, Jesus.
03:39Okay.
03:52Hey, Niles.
03:57Is something wrong?
03:59No, no, I, uh...
04:02Oh, my God!
04:04Is that Daphne's proposal?
04:06What? No, I don't... What are you...
04:09Frasier told me.
04:12Gossiping ninny?
04:14Don't worry. He swore me to secrecy.
04:17I swore him to secrecy.
04:21So how's it coming?
04:24I'm afraid I've poured so much emotion into this speech,
04:27I don't know if I can say it all without crying.
04:31Oh, that's okay.
04:33Women like a man who isn't afraid to shed a few tears.
04:37Last time I got all the way through it, I got dehydrated.
04:42Well, maybe if you cut it down a little bit,
04:45you could get through it before the waterworks start.
04:48Let me take a look.
04:55Well, what about this paragraph here?
04:57I mean, aren't words like hopeless and despair
05:01kind of a downer in a proposal?
05:04Oh, well, this is where I describe my life before I met her.
05:08And then comes the part where she comes along
05:12and the meter changes to a more sprightly iambic.
05:16Now my life has meaning.
05:19Things that never made sense before, you know, suddenly are clear.
05:24It's all because of this...
05:28wonderful woman.
05:31It's all right. I'm sure there's other stuff we can cut.
05:39Okay, like here.
05:41I mean, now, do you really have to compare her to three different roses?
05:46Well, which one would you have me eliminate?
05:49The one that represents her beauty or her passion or her...
05:53her sense of humor?
05:58Niles, you're just making this too complicated.
06:02I mean, all we really want is for a guy to get down on one knee
06:08and say, I love you.
06:12Will you be my boy?
06:16Will you be my boy?
06:28Excellent. Nice bite.
06:31Smooth, oaky blend.
06:35Mm, lovely finish.
06:38I think this is definitely a contender. How about you, Dad?
06:41This one dislodged that piece of pot roast that's been bugging me since lunch.
06:50I'm sorry, Niles, but I'm just not the right guy
06:53to help you pick a wine for your proposal dinner.
06:56Well, Dad, this is an important night for me,
06:59and I want you to play an important part.
07:02I guess it is an honor to be included. Thanks.
07:07Well, time to cleanse my palate.
07:10I'm gonna get a beer.
07:16Now? Not yet.
07:19Well, exactly how drunk does he have to get
07:21to agree to take Daphne's mother out while you propose to her?
07:24Drunk, Niles.
07:26Fill her up. Fill her up.
07:33You sure he hasn't had enough?
07:36What was the name of that widow you dated several years ago?
07:39You mean Claire Wajidubikowski?
07:42Not yet.
07:47Well...
07:50my taste buds are all sudsy clean.
07:54Good. Well, let's dive right back in. Bottoms up.
08:07Ooh.
08:10Boy, I tell you,
08:13I haven't had this much to drink
08:16since the night I proposed to your mother.
08:19Really?
08:22Yeah. That was quite a night.
08:25I was nervous as hell.
08:28Oh, I love this story.
08:31And then she said no.
08:34What? I've never heard this version.
08:37Well, she wanted to get married, but she just wasn't ready.
08:40Well, wasn't it finally convinced her to say yes?
08:44You don't want to know.
08:47Oh, come on, Dad.
08:50What Marty Crane magic did you weave
08:53to get her to change her mind, huh?
08:56Actually, I didn't change her mind, Frej.
08:59You did.
09:03Oh, dear God.
09:08I'll never forget the look on that minister's face
09:11when your mother waddled down the aisle
09:14and said, Bartholomew.
09:17You hear what I said? Bartholomaw.
09:20Dad, there's a question I've been meaning to ask you.
09:23Miles, how can you change the subject after this bombshell?
09:26You knew?
09:29Well, remember that time I had the chicken pox?
09:32Mom told me to cheer me up.
09:41I'll go ahead.
09:44So, uh, listen.
09:47Dad, uh, Daphne and I,
09:50we're going to have a little party.
09:53Dad, uh, Daphne and I, of course,
09:56want to be alone on the big night.
09:59Oh, yeah.
10:02And, uh, I was wondering if perhaps you could take
10:05Daphne's mother out for the evening.
10:08You want me to take out Daphne's mother?
10:11Is that what this has all been about?
10:14No. More wine?
10:17I can't stand that woman.
10:21Let me help you out.
10:24Sure, I'll do it. I'll go out with her.
10:27Oh, Dad. Thank you.
10:30I will never forget this.
10:33Forget what?
10:39Hello, all.
10:42Hello. How was the movie?
10:45Oh, not bad, considering my daughter's famous sense of direction
10:48made us 45 minutes late.
10:51Then she got me popcorn without butter
10:54and kept shushing me, just because I can predict
10:57what people will say next in a movie.
11:03Hello, Marty.
11:06Uh, excuse me.
11:09I need a beer. Now. Now.
11:13Dad, um, you know what we were just talking about?
11:17The fact that I was a...
11:20a guest at your wedding?
11:25Yeah.
11:28Well, it's just the least bit startling,
11:33and I have always respected you and Mother
11:39and the decisions that you made throughout your lifetime,
11:42but this information does beg one question.
11:50Dad, am I a year older?
11:57No.
12:00Your birthday's the same. We just faked our anniversary.
12:04Oh, thank heaven.
12:16You know, Marty, I'm not surprised you asked me out.
12:21Um, you're not?
12:23Oh, don't be coy.
12:25A romantic boat ride to a remote island?
12:29I know when a man's trying to seduce me.
12:32Uh, Mrs. Moon.
12:35Oh, it was inevitable, really.
12:38I mean, here we are,
12:41two comfortable old shoes looking for new mates.
12:46Actually, I'm not that comfortable.
12:49Oh, well, maybe you just need someone to break you in.
12:54Isn't that Marty Crane from work?
12:57Right.
13:00Didn't you two have a fang going on?
13:03No.
13:05We just made out at the office party.
13:07Then what happened? Blew you off?
13:09Actually, I think he was kind of interested.
13:12He slipped a note in my lunch.
13:14He drove past my house.
13:15He called me a couple of times and hung up.
13:18And you didn't do anything.
13:20What were you thinking? He's cute.
13:22He is cute, isn't he?
13:24What a wonderful sunset.
13:27I bet you ordered it just for me, didn't you, Marty?
13:31Actually, the sun goes down almost every night.
13:35Oh, Moon.
13:37Stop making me fall in love with you.
13:40Uh, you know, I...
13:43I think there's been a bit of a misunderstanding here.
13:47I didn't mean this to be a date-date.
13:51More of a friendship thing.
13:53You know, I really enjoy your company, but...
13:56No, no.
14:00I should have known.
14:02What could you possibly want with a dried-up old prune like me?
14:06Look, you're not a dried-up old...
14:08Please, I don't want your pity.
14:11I'll just stand at the bar and drink all night.
14:14Even though my doctor said one more episode could cost me me liver.
14:19Oh, now, come now.
14:21Look, if you want to pretend not to know me, I'll understand completely.
14:25Look, you've misunderstood what I said.
14:28No.
14:30I mean, you don't think I'm unattractive?
14:33Oh, unattractive?
14:37You said that, not me.
14:41It's not too late. Go over there and say hello.
14:44He's with somebody, a big weird.
14:47You don't have to make a play for him. Just say hello.
14:49You can tell by his reaction whether or not he's still interested.
14:53Gertrude, this is wrong.
14:57Your husband just left you.
15:00You're vulnerable.
15:02I'm not vulnerable.
15:04I'm ripe and receptive.
15:08Okay.
15:11I'll tell you the truth.
15:14You know, I was shot, right?
15:18Yes, in the hip.
15:20Except that the damage wasn't confined to the hip.
15:26There were fragments that traveled.
15:31So?
15:34Oh, you mean...
15:36Yeah.
15:37Yeah, but you can still...
15:38No.
15:40But they have pills now.
15:42No.
15:45Acupuncture?
15:47Oh, don't remind me.
15:50You know, the sad fact is it just doesn't work.
15:57I have absolutely no sexual feeling in my groin area.
16:03Period.
16:08Oh, Marty, that's terrible.
16:11Oh, I am sorry I brought it up.
16:14Oh, that's all right.
16:16No harm done.
16:28Excuse me, Mr. Park.
16:32Yes, Dr. Crane.
16:34I couldn't help noticing that the crab cakes are getting just a bit brown.
16:41They're getting beautifully crunchy.
16:45I see.
16:47Because when I said brown, I actually meant more like black, like burned.
16:52They're Cajun.
16:56Everything all right in here?
16:58With the food, no problem.
17:04Everything's under control, Niles.
17:06We're all set.
17:07You just relax, okay?
17:09I can't believe it.
17:10I worked so hard to make everything perfect for Daphne, and now the moment is almost...
17:15Do I smell burning crab?
17:18That's Cajun.
17:24It's her.
17:25Go.
17:26Godspeed.
17:30Everyone, everyone, faces, faces.
17:34Coming, my sweet.
17:43Are you all right?
17:44Don't touch me.
17:45I have the flu.
17:49Oh, you poor dear.
17:51Here, here, here.
17:52Come here.
17:53Sit right down here until we're ready to eat.
17:56I can't eat.
17:58I need my mouth to breathe.
18:02I hope you didn't go to too much trouble with dinner.
18:09Oh, no, no, I, uh...
18:11Hey, you know what?
18:13A good cup of tea and you'll be rallying in no time.
18:16You'll never guess what I have planned for tonight.
18:19All I want to do is stuff Kleenex up me nose, collapse on the couch and pray for death.
18:28Keep guessing.
18:32I'm sorry, Niles.
18:34Oh, that's all right.
18:38Lie here.
18:40I'll go heat up some soup in the kitchen.
18:47Dinner's off.
18:48What did you say?
18:51Niles, even if the crab cakes were a total write-off, we can still salvage a meal.
18:54No, no, no, no, no.
18:56Daphne's sick.
18:58Oh, oh, Wolfgang, could you open a can of plain chicken broth and heat it up for me?
19:06You're just canceling everything?
19:08The choir, the string quartet, the dry ice?
19:11Yes, all of it.
19:12I want this proposal to be the greatest night of Daphne's life.
19:15What's the point of doing it if she's too sick to enjoy it?
19:17We spent weeks pulling this thing together.
19:19Well, we'll just get everybody back sometime when she's feeling better.
19:23Not everybody.
19:32All right, all right, listen.
19:34I'll take Daphne into the guest room to lie down so you can get everybody out of here.
19:37Just be quiet.
19:39I don't want to blow the surprise for next time.
19:41Rest assured she won't suspect a thing.
19:44Niles, I think there's a bird loose in here.
19:50I thought doves might be a nice addition.
19:57It looked like a dove.
19:59Oh, I think your fever's causing you to hallucinate.
20:12Come along.
20:13Let's take you to the guest room for a good lie down.
20:17Why are you yelling?
20:18Because your ears are all stuffed up.
20:20No, they're not.
20:21They're not?
20:22Oh, well, maybe mine are.
20:23Gee, I hope I'm not getting what you have.
20:40Shh, shh, shh, shh.
20:41Everyone, everyone, shh, shh.
20:43Very quietly, I have an announcement to make.
20:48I'm terribly sorry, but tonight's festivities have been indefinitely postponed due to illness.
20:56But we still get paid, right?
20:59Yes, you still get paid, yes.
21:01Now, I need all of you to file quickly and quietly out the front door.
21:06It is imperative that the young lady not know any of you are ever here.
21:11I'm telling you, that room has a draft.
21:14Get the dirt.
21:15Well, come on.
21:16Let's go to the living room and build a nice fire.
21:19No, no, no.
21:20We can't go in the living room because that...
21:27Of course we can go in the living room and have a nice fire.
21:30Come here and sit down.
21:32Wow.
21:33Um, do you want to borrow my pajamas?
21:35No, I feel silly in those.
21:37They're so big and baggy.
21:39I'm the only one here who's going to see you.
21:53Oh, how about some tea?
21:56Not now.
22:04Oh, I have some of those raspberry candies you like.
22:07No, you stay right here next to me, Niles Craig.
22:16I'll get you a blanket.
22:19I'll catch a chill down there.
22:22Darling, get you all comfy.
22:25Oh, I'm sorry I ruined our evening.
22:28You did nothing of the sort.
22:31I don't know what I did to deserve you.
22:34Are you kidding?
22:35I got the better end of this deal.
22:37Oh, yeah.
22:38Look at me.
22:39Nose running, hair a mess.
22:42I must look a real fright.
23:05You are simply the most adorable creature I have ever seen on this earth.
23:10Oh, I'm sure.
23:12No, I mean it.
23:13From your beautiful toes all the way up to your crusty nose,
23:18there's not an inch of you that I don't adore.
23:24You know, it's funny.
23:27You could take a million years to plan the perfect evening,
23:32and you would, uh...
23:34You'd never come up with this.
23:37Daphne, I have to ask you a question.
23:43Hold on.
23:45What is it?
23:47I have to ask you a question.
23:51Hold on.
23:53What is it?
24:15You were saying?
24:18Daphne Moon,
24:21will you,
24:24and your beautiful toes,
24:27and your exquisite ankles,
24:30and your precious knees,
24:34elbows,
24:36arms,
24:38fingers,
24:40shoulders,
24:46will you marry me?
24:51Oh, Niles!
24:53Of course I will!
24:56May I?
25:26Oh, my.
25:28And maybe I seem a bit confused.
25:31Well, maybe.
25:32But I got you pegged.
25:34Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
25:37But I don't know what to do
25:39with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
25:44They're calling again.
25:47Thank you!