Malcolm In The Middle Season 2 Episode 21 Malcolm Vs Reese
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00:00Hey mom!
00:29Want to buy a worm?
00:32Oh, for crying out loud.
00:36Well, let's get you cleaned up.
00:40Don't forget your ears, Dewey.
00:44Okay.
00:51Yes, no, maybe.
00:55I don't know.
00:58Can you repeat the question?
01:02You're not the boss of me now
01:05You're not the boss of me now
01:07You're not the boss of me now
01:10And you're not so big
01:13You're not the boss of me now
01:16You're not the boss of me now
01:19You're not the boss of me now
01:21And you're not so big
01:24When Francis is home, anything we do is fun.
01:38I mean, we're just watching some stupid TV show, but it doesn't matter.
01:42This totally rules.
01:44This totally sucks.
01:46Isn't there anything fun to do around here?
01:49I've got some chalk.
01:51We could draw some dead guy outlines on the sidewalk.
01:54Boring.
01:55Mom's at home.
01:57We could play cantaloupe ball.
01:58We did that last time I was home.
02:01Come on, guys, think.
02:07I'd be up for the chalk outline thing.
02:15Kitty's at the end of an ear infection.
02:17He'll eat drops three times a day.
02:20Now, Jelly Bean likes to have a half cup of wet food in one bowl and a half cup of dry in another.
02:28Now, he likes the juice from the wet half poured onto the dry.
02:34Now, no overfeeding.
02:35I mean that, mister.
02:38Okay, maybe tomorrow.
02:39I can't say no to you.
02:41Craig, can we speed things up?
02:43We've got Jelly Bean's emergency numbers.
02:45We know where his sweaters are.
02:46You showed us how to take his temperature.
02:48Is there anything else Dewey needs to know?
02:49I guess that's it, sport.
02:52Now, taking care of another living thing is a big responsibility.
02:57Are you sure you're up to the challenge?
02:59Mm-hmm.
03:00Don't worry, Craig.
03:01I have a feeling Dewey's going to do a great job.
03:06Great.
03:07And when the long weekend is over, you'll have earned five whole dollars.
03:13You told Mom ten.
03:14Right.
03:15Ten.
03:16Aren't you a good little lister?
03:17Ow!
03:18I'm not so sure about this, Hal.
03:21Are you sure that Dewey can handle this?
03:23Ah, it's no big deal, honey.
03:24A job is a good thing for a boy.
03:26He teaches him the value of money, gives him a little self-confidence.
03:30Besides, Craig's new place is only two blocks from our house.
03:33Hey, you couldn't see our backyard from here.
03:36Hey!
03:37I almost forgot to show you my itinerary.
03:40Yeah, the convention lasts three days.
03:43I'll be back early Monday evening.
03:45Wow.
03:46Craig, I had no idea you were so into comic books.
03:49Well, it's not like I'm a freak about it.
03:51It just helps me keep my life in perspective.
03:54You know, somehow my problems seem insignificant.
03:56When compared to Richie Riches.
03:59Well, it's time to say goodbye, Jelly Belly.
04:03Come give Daddy some kissy kisses.
04:05Come give me some kissy kisses.
04:08I love you.
04:12I know, son.
04:14But a job's a job.
04:16Mmm.
04:20Big news, guys.
04:22Things are going to get a lot more interesting around here.
04:25What's up?
04:26I forget.
04:28You guys enjoy wrestling, don't you?
04:31Raging the cage?
04:32Oh, my God.
04:33You're the best brother ever.
04:34We're going to have so much...
04:35That's only two tickets.
04:38I know.
04:40How am I ever going to decide which one of you to take?
04:43You deliberately bought two tickets just to torment us?
04:48No, of course not.
04:50I bought them to see who loves me the most.
04:53Now, I know you both love me, but I bet one of you loves me just a little bit more.
05:01No.
05:02No way.
05:02We're not doing another butt-kissing contest.
05:05There's got to be another way.
05:06Okay, fine.
05:07Who's got a quarter?
05:09Here.
05:10Great.
05:11You're in the lead.
05:12Maybe you should make me a sandwich.
05:15Oh, come on, guys.
05:17It's Rage in the Cage.
05:19You should be happy.
05:21We are happy.
05:23You're not doing the happy dance.
05:30Happy dance, happy dance.
05:32We love to do the happy dance.
05:35Happier.
05:36Happy dance, happy dance.
05:39We love to do the happy dance.
05:42Happier.
05:44Happy dance, happy dance.
05:46We love to do the happy...
05:48A half cup of wet food in one bowl,
05:56and a half cup of dry in another.
05:58He likes the juice from the wet half poured onto the dry.
06:04Jelly Bean also likes you better than your brothers.
06:08Everyone likes you better than your brothers.
06:11Someday, you're going to be a president of Idaho,
06:14and anyone taller than you will be fed to wolves.
06:17Time for our ear drops, Jelly Bean.
06:19Okay, Jelly Bean, stop hiding.
06:37Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.
06:42Okay, come on.
06:44Please don't go outside, Jelly Bean.
06:57Don't be scared, Jelly Bean.
06:59They're just ear drops.
07:01See?
07:06Jelly Bean!
07:08Jelly Bean!
07:10Hey, we've got a 90s here.
07:23We won't get a 90s here.
07:27We'll know a couple of tests to help you know.
07:28I'm not getting a 90s here.
07:30I won't get a 90s here.
07:31I won't get a 90s here.
07:32No.
07:35If you want to know what you are looking for,
07:37let's be a 60s here.
07:37Let's see.
07:39Turn.
08:00Hey, Ma, can I borrow the car to go over to Richie's house?
08:02Ah, nope.
08:04Why not?
08:05Because whenever you return the car, it's always filthy.
08:08That is so unfair.
08:10You always assume the worst of me.
08:13Assume?
08:14I see it.
08:15How am I going to show you that I've actually grown up if you never give me the chance?
08:19Okay, I'm listening.
08:21Okay, how about if I wash the car before I take it?
08:26And I'll rake the leaves and I'll scoop out the gutters,
08:29and if that's not enough, I'll clean the whole attic.
08:32Mom, give him a break.
08:34Okay, you got yourself a deal.
08:36Bring it home in one piece.
08:40You need anything iron, Mom?
08:44Dewey?
08:46Are you in here, son?
08:50What's wrong, son?
08:51You were supposed to be home hours ago.
08:54I can't do anything right.
08:57Dewey.
08:57Where's Jellybean?
09:02I left the door open, and he ran away.
09:07Oh, dear.
09:08Do we have to tell Mom?
09:12Well, this is a very serious situation, son.
09:16Of course we're not going to tell your mother.
09:17Really?
09:20Really.
09:21I think it might be a little bit too much responsibility for your first job.
09:27Hey, don't worry.
09:28We'll find Jellybean.
09:29But if I'm looking for hours...
09:32Well, that's your first lesson, Dewey.
09:34Sometimes it takes a lot of time and hard work to accomplish something.
09:38But what if Jellybean's hurt?
09:41It's dark outside.
09:44Let me tell you a little something about cats, huh?
09:47They're nocturnal creatures, which means they prefer the night.
09:52Then again, so do coyotes and feral dogs and devil worshippers.
09:57My point is that Jellybean is fine.
10:04He'll come home when he's good and ready.
10:07We're just going to put a little bowl of food up,
10:11and he'll come back.
10:14Are you sure?
10:15Trust me.
10:16Tomorrow morning, everything is going to be fine.
10:26Dad!
10:27Jellybean's bowl is empty!
10:30He was here!
10:31You're the smartest man in the world!
10:34Yes!
10:44No sign of forced entry.
10:46I just don't see how these guys got in.
10:48It's a mystery.
10:50You left the window open.
10:53Mystery solved.
10:54I'm sorry.
10:54What is it you say you're doing here again?
10:56We're watching the cat while the owner's away.
11:00I don't see a cat.
11:03We're not doing a very good job.
11:12Hello?
11:12How?
11:13How?
11:15Oh, Craig!
11:17Hi!
11:18How's the convention?
11:20Fantastic.
11:21I've picked up some great bargains.
11:24You would not believe some of the idiots that are here.
11:27Anyhow, I just called to see how Jellybean's doing.
11:31Oh, fine.
11:33He's a frisky little guy, you know.
11:35Get off the TV, Jellybean!
11:37That reminds me.
11:39Could you hit the timer button on my VCR?
11:41I want to tape R-less.
11:44Uh, sure.
11:47No problem.
11:49Hey, Hal.
11:49Um, I want you to think I'm weird, but could you put Jellybean on the phone?
11:56Uh, yeah.
11:58Uh, let me just pick him up here.
12:02There he is.
12:04Okay.
12:05Okay, I got his ear to the phone.
12:08Hey, Jellybean.
12:09How's my little pussycat?
12:12Have you been a good boy while I've been away?
12:14I love you, potty.
12:23Give daddy a kiss.
12:28Jellybean?
12:31I gotta tell you, Reese, you are doing a great job.
12:35I am very impressed.
12:38Here?
12:40Uh, one over.
12:44I just want to point out that Malcolm has not done a thing,
12:48and I have been carrying you around all afternoon.
12:52Don't think your enthusiasm and that pathetic look of desperation are going unnoticed.
12:57Here you go, Francis.
12:59What's this?
13:00Your English term paper on the rise of the novel.
13:03It's a guaranteed A.
13:04You can screw off the whole rest of the semester and still pull a C.
13:11This pleases me.
13:14Come on, Jellybean.
13:20Come on, Jellybean.
13:34Come down.
13:35How?
13:36You're a good boy, she can.
13:39I'm a good boy, she can.
13:40You're a good boy, she can.
13:43You're alright, were you?
13:45Fuck!
13:46Damn!
13:47Come back here, Jellybean!
13:51Jellybean!
13:52You want some candy?
13:53Get me!
13:54Get me!
13:55Get me!
13:57Get me!
13:59Get me!
14:01Get me!
14:02Get me!
14:04What is it?
14:18What?
14:19You know, I realized something.
14:21You can do Francis' homework for the next 10 years,
14:24but you still can't go to Rage in the Cage if you're grounded.
14:28What are you talking about?
14:31Mom!
14:34What is with you, Reese?
14:45You've got to get in there and see what Malcolm did to Dewey.
14:48He's totally lost it.
14:50Hey, Mom, where's Dewey?
14:52He left early to go feed Craig's cat.
14:54No way!
14:59Huh?
15:01What is going on with you, Reese?
15:04Whoa!
15:17Dewey!
15:18Finally see your wife!
15:20What happened to your face?
15:22What happened to your pants?
15:25Never mind that.
15:26Look who I am!
15:27Mrs. Johnson's cat?
15:32Yes!
15:33Mrs. Johnson's cat!
15:34Yes!
15:35Go, let's go.
15:36You know what?
15:46Yes!
15:46No!
15:47I know who you is!
15:59Is that a poor?
15:59No!
16:00No!
16:00It was a poor...
16:01No!
16:01No!
16:02No!
16:02Hey, I found these in the laundry in my shirt pocket.
16:29You put them there, didn't you?
16:32Yeah, just like you put my muddy sneaker on the kitchen table.
16:37Guys, what's going on?
16:39He's trying to get me grinding so I can't go with you, but he's too stupid to pull it off.
16:43We'll see you stupid when this stupid's watching a wrestling match.
16:47Whoa, guys, this is supposed to be a contest about love and you've twisted it into something ugly.
16:54Carry on.
16:56Get off me!
16:58Get off me!
16:59This too pleases me.
17:03Okay, we can fix this.
17:07Cats are territorial.
17:09I'd put money on it that Jelly Bean hasn't been outside a square block of this place.
17:15Ooh.
17:16Yep, he's been back.
17:21These are fresh.
17:23But he never stays.
17:25Well, then we'll just have to find a way to keep him here, won't we?
17:30Paid a little visit to my doctor.
17:32What are those?
17:34These are sleeping pills, Dewey.
17:37I simply told him I've been up for the past few nights, things aren't going well with the wife, afraid I'm going to lose the house.
17:45Now, don't you worry, son.
17:49Those are just lies I told to get prescription drugs.
17:52Now, we're just going to grind a few of these up, sprinkle it on his food, and it's Sweet Dreams Jelly Bean.
18:00Should we put them in the wet or the dry?
18:02The wet, dry, milk, water.
18:04We have to cover all our bases, so we are going to get this cat.
18:16Which one's Jelly Bean?
18:19Well, that's another challenge.
18:21We'll make three piles.
18:23Probably not Jelly Bean, definitely not Jelly Bean, and not even a cat.
18:28We'll start with that possum.
18:31I think it's time to call Mom.
18:34I was hoping you'd say that.
18:43Rage in the cage.
18:45Rage in the cage.
18:46What are you doing?
18:48Wait, oh, Mom sees what you did to my expensive microscope.
18:51You don't have the guts.
18:53Say you quit, Reese.
18:55No!
18:56You're going to totally be grounded when Mom sees a beating you gave me.
19:00Ow!
19:00What are you doing?
19:08Sucker!
19:09Oh, yeah?
19:12Oh, yeah?
19:12Hey, hey, hey!
19:28This isn't about the tickets, is it?
19:31You have to decide.
19:32Who's going with you?
19:34Oh, yeah.
19:35I probably should have said something.
19:37I met this girl at the burger barn, and guess what?
19:40She likes wrestling.
19:42What?
19:43You can't!
19:45Guys, it's a girl who likes wrestling.
19:49I'm just as much a victim as you are.
19:54Oh, you'll understand when you're older.
19:57You guys are cool.
19:59I'm definitely bringing you home a couple programs.
20:05You're telling me none of these cats is jelly bean?
20:08What's wrong with you?
20:10Come on, Lois.
20:10This is a very complicated situation.
20:13Don't blame Dewey.
20:14I am not blaming Dewey.
20:17Oh.
20:18Mom, babe, who are you?
20:19Dewey, it's okay.
20:20Just let your mom take care of it.
20:22Now, here's what we're going to do.
20:26Okay, I'll say it.
20:28It was a really bad idea.
20:33Tell you one thing.
20:34I've never seen 50 cats run out of a place so fast.
20:37Hell, how could this have happened?
20:39We've ruined Craig's life.
20:41No, no, it's not our fault, Lois.
20:43At a certain point, we simply have to say to ourselves that Craig is just cursed.
20:48Dad, it's jelly bean!
20:51Oh, my God.
20:52Oh, my God.
20:53Let me just grind up one of these sleeping pills.
20:55Won't take a minute.
20:57Keep them entertained.
21:00Or we could just pick them up.
21:06Yay!
21:07You see, Dewey?
21:08I told you everything would work out.
21:12Woo!
21:12Woo!
21:14Woo!
21:15You know, it doesn't pay as well as some other summer jobs, but I get the chance to mentor inner-city children.
21:23And how can you put a price on smiles?
21:26Oh, cute and sweet.
21:29You know, this is the first time I've gone out in six months.
21:34Then we'll have to make this a night to remember, won't we?
21:38Woo!
21:38Woo!
21:38Woo!
21:38Woo!
21:39Woo!
21:39Woo!
21:39Woo!
21:40Woo!
21:41Woo!
21:41Woo!
21:42Woo!
21:42Woo!
21:42Woo!
21:43Woo!
21:43Woo!
21:43Woo!
21:43Woo!
21:44Woo!
21:45Woo!
21:46Amateurs.
21:47What?
21:48Oh, it's nothing.
21:49It's just a prank from some of the kids at the center.
21:53You know, it's inspiring how they can laugh after all they've been through.
21:59Oh, man.
22:01I wasn't speeding, was I?
22:03I don't think so.
22:11License and registration.
22:12Officer, what'd I do?
22:13What'd I do?
22:14This car's been reported stolen.
22:15License and registration, please.
22:17Oh, it's been reported stolen, huh?
22:21I'm not gonna ask you again.
22:27License and registration?
22:28Look, officer.
22:29I know this looks bad, but...
22:30Open the trunk, sir.
22:31Officer, let me explain.
22:32Open the trunk!
22:33Open the trunk, sir.
22:34Officer, let me explain.
22:35Open the trunk!
22:36Open the trunk, sir.
22:37Officer, let me explain.
22:38Open the trunk!
22:39Get out of the car!
22:40Mom wasn't too thrilled about having to pick us up at the police station, but it was totally worth it.
22:42We don't have to serve Francis anymore.
22:43Here's your sarin truck.
22:44Here's your sarin truck.
22:45Here's your sarin truck.
22:46Here's your sarin truck.
22:47Can I go to bed now?
23:08We don't have to serve Francis anymore.
23:11Here's your sandwich, Craig.
23:12Can I go to bed now?
23:14Ooh, mayo on only one side?
23:17It's a lot of mayo.
23:18No one's saying it's not, but I specifically asked for it on both sides.
23:22Craig!
23:23Malcolm, I don't like this any more than you do, but it was your mom's idea.
23:28Since as long as I'm living here, you have to do everything I say,
23:32I'll try to meet you halfway and make my orders as clear as possible.
23:36Okay, champ?
23:37Here, I heated it for ten seconds, just like you said.
23:42It's still not quite room temperature.
23:45Look, I know I'm being demanding.
23:49Jellybean's apartment was burned out, too.
23:56All right, it was almost worth it.
23:58Mew, mew, mew, mew, mew, mew, mew, mew, mew, mew.
24:07There's something you have to see.
24:22Oh, honey, the night is still young.
24:28What's the line?
24:28I'm sorry.
24:30Cut!
24:34Cut!
24:37Cut!
24:38Cut!
24:38Cut!
24:39Cut!
24:39Cut!
24:39Cut!
24:40Cut!
24:40Cut!
24:41shut up we wouldn't be in this mess if you hadn't called for help keep pushing me
24:57you can't say keep pushing me
25:09honey i'm sorry you had to see that
25:26you
25:56You