Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids - _Animal Lover_ - 1975
Transcript
00:00Hey, hey, hey! It's Bud Helmer! And I'm gonna sing a song for you!
00:13And Bill's gonna show you a thing or two!
00:18You'll have some fun now, with me and all the gang!
00:23Learning from each other, while we do our thing!
00:27Nah, nah, nah, gonna have a good time!
00:32It's Bill Cosby coming at you with music and fun, and if you're not careful, you may learn something before it's done.
00:38So let's get ready, okay? Hey, hey, hey!
00:41Nah, nah, nah, gonna have a good time!
00:45Nah, nah, nah, gonna have a good time!
00:50Nah, nah, nah, gonna have a good time!
00:58Hey, hey, hey! Put the ball in play!
01:14Let's go, Rudy!
01:28Now what? I just ran out of fingers.
01:32Now you know why some cats say baseball is two minutes of action crammed into four hours.
01:37And Rudy isn't helping much either.
01:40He's working on that old theory of never put off tomorrow what you can put off till the day after tomorrow.
01:46Anyway, let's see what happens now that Russell's ran out of fingers.
01:51Betcha, man!
02:04Before this goes any further, you think you might want this?
02:11Yeah, the ball.
02:16Now class.
02:22I got it!
02:27Got it! Got it!
02:30It's mine! Back off! Got it!
02:44Hey, that one's mine, don't count!
02:47Cool it, Rudy.
02:50Cool it, Rudy. Bill still hasn't got my home run ball.
02:55Dulcy's dog-on-dog is what Bill wants to catch! I demand justice!
03:01Don't tip, though. They just might give it to you.
03:04What's all that noise about?
03:07It's all your fault, Dulcy!
03:10So nice to see Rudy taking such a noble attitude.
03:14And now, we all know that Rudy's a brave dude.
03:17In fact, his boast is that they don't come too small for him.
03:21What our pal doesn't know is that Dulcy is not about to let him hand her a lot of guff.
03:26No way. In short order, they're going to have words.
03:29But Rudy's not going to get much chance to use his. Just listen.
03:36Huh? Here I had this no-hitter going for me.
03:40And I threw a perfect strike, which Fat Albert is lucky to get a piece of.
03:45So, Fat Albert pops this itty-bitty fly ball over my head,
03:50and Bill is about to catch it in his hip pocket,
03:54when that mangy pooch of yours attacks him and knocks him over,
03:59causing him to let Fat Albert score an unearned home run.
04:04Rudy, how dare you?
04:06Huh?
04:07Don't you dare call Sanford a mangy pooch. He just happens to be a pedigree schnauzer.
04:11Schnauzer mouser. All I know is he ruined my lifetime pitching average.
04:18Get out of this ballpark, you little count mutt.
04:24Look, Dulcy, how many times we got to tell you to keep your mutt out of our hair?
04:29Pooh, no self-respecting dog would go near your hair, would they, Sanford?
04:42Bill's right. You got no call letting that miserable mutt of yours run wild around here.
04:49Oh, no.
04:51Oh, yeah? So, we don't ever want to see old Four Legs around here ever again.
04:58You go along with me, gang?
05:01Yeah, we got to go along with you, Rudy.
05:04Now, you got the good word from the House of Representatives.
05:08Take Sanford and scram.
05:12You heard him. Take Four Legs and get on the way from here, man.
05:17Very well. Show me your papers.
05:21Papers? What papers?
05:23The papers that say you boys own this public property.
05:26Come on, Dulcy. Quit putting us on.
05:28You see, you have no right to try to keep others from the just pursuits of happiness.
05:33Okay, if you want to pursue your happiness, it went that way.
05:42This is no joking matter. I feel very strongly about the rights of individuals.
05:46So do we.
05:47And Sanford is an individual, too.
05:49Just because he's a smart animal doesn't mean he doesn't have the same rights you do.
05:54Aw, come on.
05:56Sanford has a privilege of running free.
05:58I know.
05:59That's what's wrong with people today.
06:01They coop the poor animals and birds up like prisoners.
06:04You got to draw the line somewhere, Dulcy.
06:06Otherwise, we'll be up to our hips in pets.
06:09Oh, yeah?
06:10How would you feel if you had to go around all day with a leash around your neck?
06:15Lucky for him, they don't make them that big.
06:20Oh, it's no use. Why am I wasting time trying to get through to you?
06:24You...
06:25Dummies?
06:26That's close enough. Good day.
06:30Hey, there'll be a slight delay.
06:33Huh? Why?
06:35Lift the net.
06:39Do the leopard calves do it this way, too?
06:43Can't see.
06:45Don't talk about no class to us.
06:47You're the no classiest cat there is.
06:51Nobody hears you, Subway.
06:53Subway? Why you call me Subway?
06:56Why you call me Subway?
06:58Because you're such a big boy.
07:00Cool it, you two.
07:02The master volleyball server is ready to dish it up.
07:06Barking.
07:07Barking.
07:08Barking.
07:09Barking.
07:10Barking.
07:11Barking.
07:12Barking.
07:13Barking.
07:14Barking.
07:15Oh, man.
07:16Oh, man.
07:17That doesn't hold it.
07:19Man, Mr. Harcourt!
07:21Man, look at Mr. Darryl Clark.
07:25Court be a law against all these much-runaway and violent citizens.
07:29Yeah, no matter where we go, we get hounded by the hounds.
07:33All right, all right, let's get going.
07:36Hey, hey, hey, again the play.
07:39Got me every...
07:41Oh, man.
07:43Would you believe that?
07:45People should put pigeons on leeches.
07:47That's leeches.
07:49Leeches are leeches. They should keep them on them.
07:54One more time.
07:58Bill?
08:00Don't blame me. How was I to know the ball was ever going to reach me?
08:03You'll be all booped up, a bird bitch, and a bebo doll, a bitch.
08:08Look, see if it's got eyeball.
08:10Let's get it!
08:14There he goes!
08:16Get him, get him, get him!
08:19Don't let him get away!
08:21Get back there, get back there!
08:23Get him, get him!
08:25Work in, work in!
08:27He went this way!
08:29Quick, quick!
08:31He's got to be around the corner.
08:45Hey, look like Sanford got away.
08:49Yeah, dumb, dumb pooch.
08:53If he's so dumb, what does that make us?
08:57Well, straight.
09:00Sanford may be a great tonic to Dulcie, but he's a great pill to everybody else.
09:04Let's see how Fat Albert and the kids handle this situation.
09:09Hold it.
09:13That's the answer to our problem. Follow me.
09:17Excuse us, officer, we've got a citizen's complaint.
09:20Okay, boys, let's have it.
09:22It's about a theft.
09:24Oh, what was taken?
09:26A volleyball.
09:28I see. Who was the culprit?
09:30Sanford.
09:31You mean the guy in TV?
09:33No, no, Dulcie's Sanford.
09:36Maybe you'd better start at the top.
09:38Okay, I'll give it to you like it happened.
09:41See, we was playing volleyball and Dulcie's dog Sanford swiped up,
09:44and not only that, but he's been running loose with the collar and the leash
09:47and messing up everything for everybody.
09:50Give us a description of the dog and we'll report it to the animal care department.
09:57Over here.
10:00Bingo.
10:02I just found out what you boys did.
10:04You reported my poor Sanford to the animal care center, didn't you?
10:08Okay, we did, but you asked for it.
10:10Letting your dog run loose all over the whole neighborhood.
10:14Now I have to go down to the animal people and get Sanford.
10:17All this trouble because of your anti-nature attitudes.
10:20Don't get us wrong, Dulcie. We're not anti-anxiety.
10:23We're just anti-getting our volleyball swiped right in the middle of the game, that's all.
10:28Oh, yeah? Well, I'm going to pick up Sanford,
10:31and we're going to do just like we did before.
10:33So there.
10:43Uh-oh. Huh?
10:48Huh.
10:49That's the nicest thing you said to us yet.
10:52You're lucky that's all I'm doing.
10:54Why do you boys insist on picking on Sanford and me? Why?
10:57Well, look, Dulcie, we're not picking on you, man.
11:00Or him.
11:02How can you say that?
11:04You report Sanford to the police, and they have him picked up by the animal people.
11:08Oh, and you say you're not picking on me?
11:11Aw, and you say you're not picking on me?
11:14Sanford, get them out of here.
11:21Hey, get me out of here, man.
11:27Hey, hey, hey, get out of the way.
11:31Sanford, Sanford, stop.
11:37Hold it.
11:45Wait, Sanford, don't chase them anymore. Wait.
11:53Well, you really can't blame Fat Albert and the gang for being worried about Sanford.
11:58They say a barking dog never bites.
12:00The only trouble is you never know when he may stop barking.
12:03Anyway, Fat Albert and the gang are safe for the moment, even if Dulcie isn't.
12:08You'll see what I'm talking about in a minute.
12:11S-S-S-Sanford?
12:30Oh, no, Sanford.
12:36Ouch.
12:39Ouch! You bit me, naughty dog.
12:46That poor dog got confused and thought I was trying to hurt you, Sanford.
12:50Luckily, he only nipped my finger.
12:58If it hadn't been for Fat Albert and his gang, none of this would have happened.
13:02Uh-oh.
13:09Hey, hey, hey, we can be on our way.
13:14A dog nipped your finger? What kind of dog?
13:17Oh, just a plain old dog. He didn't mean to.
13:20It happened when I was trying to get Sanford away from the intersection.
13:23Dulcie, we can't take a chance. That dog might have rabies.
13:27Oh, Mom, stop worrying, will you? There's nothing wrong with that dog. Honest.
13:32We can't be sure of that. We're going to get you to a doctor right away.
13:39That's the way it is, dudes.
13:41You mean we're to blame because Dulcie got nipped by a dog?
13:46I'm not blaming anybody. The main thing is we got to find that dog fast.
13:50Yeah, because if we don't, then Dulcie will have to get pasteurized for rabies.
13:56You mean she'll have to take pasture treatments?
13:59Yeah, pasteurize is what they do to milk.
14:01Look, we don't have time to stand around here arguing. We got to find the dog.
14:06Well, sometimes Fat Albert thinks the world is against him and the gang,
14:09and right now it looks like he's right.
14:11If they don't find that dog in a hurry, Dulcie's going to have to undergo treatment for rabies,
14:15and that's a long, painful process, but very necessary in case of doubt.
14:20All we can do is hope the kids come up with the missing dog in time.
14:28Did that dog get pastured?
14:32Did that dog that nipped Dulcie have a license?
14:35Of course not. What do you think he is, a car?
14:37That's the trouble. Dulcie didn't stop to check out if he had a car or them tires.
14:44All right, we're going to split up. Everybody go in different directions.
14:48If you get a clue, report back here.
14:50Uh-huh. Describe the dog again, huh?
14:53Ah, we all know what he looks like. First, he's got four legs and a tail.
14:59L-C-L-A-S-S.
15:03Once more, the dog was big and shaggy.
15:06He was brown collar, and Dulcie said he looked like a cross between a retriever and a collie.
15:12That's right, a recall.
15:14I wish they'd recall you.
15:16Okay, now, let's get on the ball. Time is of essence.
15:29What do you think you find under Tiny's little old tin can, Mr. Wise Guy?
15:34A nickel. What do you say to that, Mr. Not-So-Wise-Guy?
15:38Come on, we got to find that dog or Dulcie's in for a lot of hassling.
15:44Whew, we're getting nowhere.
15:46Yeah, I never knew there were so many stray dogs and cats in the whole world.
15:51Come on, we can't quit now.
15:54I think this is him.
16:04Man, this is frustrating.
16:07Yeah, 90 million trillion dogs and cats and none of them him.
16:10Where's Weird Al? He ought to be back by now.
16:13Yeah, he's a real weirdo. That one, never know what'll happen to him.
16:18If you don't get here soon, we better look.
16:20Hey, dudes, think this is the dog?
16:22Hey, hey, hey, that's not the dog.
16:27Fat Albert was smart in not stalling around.
16:30Weird Harold had the right dog all right.
16:33There's something else that turned out all right, too.
16:36The dog, he didn't have rabies.
16:38Lucky for Dulcie that it worked out that way.
16:40She was saved from a lot of treatments.
16:42Now, I hope you remember if you ever get bitten by a dog or a cat.
16:47I hope you remember if you ever get bitten by a dog or a cat or any other animal.
16:51Don't wait around. Get to the doctor, fast.
16:56Let's see what's going on over there.
17:00Quiet, Sanford. I want to talk to you boys.
17:03So does your old dog.
17:05He won't hurt you. Come on out. I promise.
17:09I want to thank you for what you did.
17:11If it hadn't been for you guys, well, I'd have been in a lot of trouble.
17:16And if I hadn't gotten Sanford back, I don't know what I would have done.
17:20Notice anything different about him?
17:22You give him a bath?
17:24I always keep him clean, silly.
17:27I learned a good lesson about letting dogs run around loose.
17:30Hey, hey, hey. New leash and a collar and dog tags, too.
17:34That's right. From now on, I'm going to see that dogs stay off the streets.
17:40I got a great one.
17:42You know the best way to keep a dog off the street?
17:47Put him in a barking lot.
17:50Get it? Barking lot.
17:57Barking lot? Oh, no.
18:00Actually, Rudy doesn't have a lot of faults, but he sure makes the most out of the ones he's got.
18:06And to get the taste of Rudy's pun out of their ears,
18:08the kids have come up with a song that tells it about pets.
18:12Just give a listen.
18:17♪
18:23♪ Take a look around you
18:26♪ Before it's too late
18:28♪ Take a look around you
18:30♪ Before the problem's too great
18:32♪ Oh, yeah
18:38♪ Don't go around with your head in the clouds
18:42♪ Something is happening
18:44♪ Just take a look around
18:47♪ Some of God's creatures do nothing but roam
18:51♪ Alleys and bad streets are their only home
18:55♪ Take a look around you
18:58♪ Before it's too late
19:00♪ Take a look around you
19:02♪ Before the problem's too great
19:04♪ Oh, yeah
19:07♪ If you've got a puppy and help him get by
19:12♪ Don't look now, but you've got a friend for life
19:17♪ When there's a problem, you can't handle yourself
19:21♪ Play it smart and give him some help
19:25♪ Take a look around you
19:28♪ Before it's too late
19:30♪ Take a look around you
19:32♪ Take a look around you
19:34♪ Before the problem's too great
19:36♪ Oh, yeah
19:41♪ Take a look around you
19:44♪ And you'll see
19:46♪ Take a look around you
19:48♪ That your pet is a big responsibility
19:50♪ Take a look, take a look, take a look around you
19:53♪ And love him too
19:55♪ Take a look, take a look, take a look around you
19:57♪ And most of all, don't let him know
20:00♪ Before it's too late
20:02♪ Take a look around you
20:04♪ Before the problem's too great
20:06♪ Take a look around you
20:09♪ Before it's too late
20:11♪ Take a look around you
20:13♪ Before the problem's too great
20:15♪ Take a look around you
20:18♪ Before it's too late
20:20♪ Take a look around you
20:22♪ Before the problem's too great
20:24♪ Take a look around you
20:27♪ Before it's too late
20:29♪ Take a look around you
20:31♪ Before the problem's too great
20:42Hey, hey, hey!
20:44It's fun ever!
20:46♪ Na, na, na, gonna have a good time
20:50Hey, hey, hey!
20:51♪ Na, na, na, gonna have a good time
20:54Hey, hey!
20:56♪ Na, na, na, gonna have a good time
20:59Hey, hey, hey!
21:00♪ Na, na, na, gonna have a good time