Veep Season 2 Episode 9 Running
Veep Season 2 Episode 9 Running
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00:00No, Rachel, I'm sorry, but the VP schedule has skyrocketed since the interview.
00:20Actually, I'm not sorry.
00:22I'm not sure why I just said that.
00:24Boy, I'll tell you something, that TV interview was a big gamble, but it really paid off.
00:29Look at this.
00:30What is it?
00:31They're calling you the no-BS VP.
00:32Damn right they are.
00:33I mean, I lied and everything, but it sounded true, at least.
00:39Mood is good.
00:40I just need six more years like today and they will votus potus.
00:44And remember, tomorrow you got that get moving fun run?
00:48Yeah.
00:49You probably should prepare, don't you think?
00:51It's a 10K.
00:52Yeah.
00:53I can run that thing in a suit of armor.
00:54Okay.
00:55Ma'am, I shouldn't go with you to this donor's brunch.
00:57We don't want to set off any alarm bells.
00:59Oh, yeah.
01:00You know what?
01:01Me neither.
01:02Okay.
01:03I'll go kiss some hateful billionaire ass on my own, give them all donor boners.
01:07Everyone wants a piece of you, ma'am.
01:09Yeah.
01:10Via me.
01:11I need to go talk to Ben right now.
01:13Andale!
01:14Let's go.
01:15We haven't heard anything from the president so far.
01:19We've got rumors of a whistleblower high up in the state department.
01:23What?
01:24What are you doing?
01:26I don't want people to see that.
01:28Okay.
01:29They should put those in a dispenser outside Ben's office, right?
01:33Yeah.
01:34White House staff are lawyering up in case of subpoenas for the Judiciary Committee.
01:39Ben.
01:40Ben?
01:41We've got the president's own party talking of a potential challenger.
01:43Hey, why doesn't POTUS just make an apology?
01:45I mean, I did and I was only, like, suicidal for a week.
01:49Huh?
01:50Oh, because he's a mess, all right?
01:53He's got a cave full of bats in his skull.
01:56I took the heat for the spy.
01:58Don't I get any credit for that at all?
02:01Yeah.
02:02So now we've got the House Judiciary Committee subpoenaing us senseless.
02:07And on top of that, we got a rumor going around that says that there's a challenger inside
02:13the party.
02:14What?
02:15Who?
02:16I don't know.
02:17One of Gaddafi's sons?
02:18They're polling better.
02:20So thank you very much for your help, but would you quit being so goddamn proactive?
02:25What are you going to do for an encore?
02:26Blow the opening day pitch out of your ass?
02:28Oh, that's lovely.
02:30Is this what this is going to be like for the next two years?
02:33Oh, my yes.
02:35We are a DEFCON fuck.
02:37Hey, ma'am, I got flash cards on the donors.
02:43No, thanks.
02:44I got it.
02:45Peter Spittak sleeps with his gun.
02:47Sandra O'Neill freaking hates fracking.
02:50Sidney Purcell, talking to him, it's like being stuck in a sewer pipe filled with dead
02:55rats.
02:56He's got money to burn.
02:58Not that donating to your campaign is burning money.
03:00I know what this is all about.
03:02This is a political prick tease today.
03:05We're about to meet a bunch of pricks.
03:07Yeah.
03:08Challenger.
03:09Schmalinger.
03:10I mean, if this brunch goes well, my campaign launch pad is going to be made of solid fucking
03:15gold.
03:17And then in six years, it's going to be Ms. President.
03:22Yeah.
03:23We're going to need a bigger bag.
03:24Ovaries in the Oval Office.
03:25The West Womb.
03:26What?
03:27What?
03:28You know, like a womb, like a woman has a womb, the baby comes in.
03:37How pathetic.
03:38Politico is announcing that Danny Chung has just uploaded his What I'm Listening To playlist
03:43on Spotify.
03:44Hmm.
03:45We need to do a playlist.
03:46No, we don't.
03:47Oh, we absolutely do.
03:48Get Dan.
03:49No, I can help with the songs.
03:50You know, my niece loves Katy Perry.
03:51Just like I said, get Dan.
03:52There he is.
03:53DJ Dan.
03:54Thanks for the playlist.
03:55Oh, my pleasure.
03:56Seems like it's playing pretty well, too, with the oldies and the young Chungers.
03:57The young Chungers.
03:58It's like you're thinking hashtags.
03:59You like that?
04:00All right.
04:01Well, now, you know, maybe we can call the over 65ers the Granny Chungs.
04:15Something.
04:16You know, I'll keep working on that one.
04:18Oh, shit.
04:19You need to take that.
04:20Keep her happy.
04:21Call order.
04:22You smell that?
04:23Money.
04:24Hey, Dan?
04:25Ma'am?
04:26Have you heard anything about this Danny Chung playlist?
04:29Just caught that, actually.
04:30Some smart stuff on there, too.
04:32Nas for the young folks, Dean Martin for the retirees.
04:35He just got one of his butt droids to do it, which is why I want you to do it for me, okay?
04:41Your mix is my command.
04:43Come on, Sue.
04:44Help me out with this, okay?
04:45You're good at this stuff.
04:46You're young, you're hip, you're hop.
04:48What about Jimmy Cliff?
04:49The harder they come.
04:50No.
04:51Look, I have no idea who that is, so no.
04:54Elvis Costello, peace, love, and understanding.
04:56What?
04:57No, no, and no.
04:58Are you getting these all from your iPod?
05:00No.
05:01I think it's in a cloud.
05:02Oh.
05:03You know, do you think that Danny Chung's the one who's getting ready to bust a move in two years?
05:08Well, the way POTUS is going, he'll probably stumble into a war sooner or later.
05:12Chung will reenlist and hopefully get himself killed.
05:15I don't understand why I don't get the same respect as he does, you know?
05:18Shit.
05:19Oh, what about that?
05:21Respect.
05:22You know the Aretha Franklin song?
05:24Yes.
05:25Yeah, yeah, yeah.
05:26Hey, Mike.
05:27Mike.
05:28Oh.
05:29Oh, my God.
05:30Duchess is down.
05:31Duchess is down.
05:32Yellow, yellow.
05:33I repeat, Duchess is down.
05:34Go, Rick.
05:35Oh, God, your face.
05:37Is it bad?
05:39No.
05:40Yes.
05:41You're fine, ma'am.
05:42You're fine.
05:43Madam Vice President, if you just stand still, please.
05:45Calm down, Martin, okay?
05:46She's fine.
05:47It's not a terrorist.
05:48Just lock up the hallway, guys.
05:49It's all fine.
05:50Lock it up.
05:51Lock it up.
05:52Yes?
05:53Here's what you do.
05:54Okay.
05:55Don't move.
05:56We're going to have to cut your clothes off you.
05:57Huh?
05:58I walked through a glass door before.
05:59This is what you do, okay?
06:00You're kidding.
06:01No, I was fine because I was drunk.
06:02You're going to be okay.
06:03Oh.
06:04Shit, the donors.
06:05Just go tell them I'm going to be a couple minutes late.
06:06Go tell them that, okay?
06:07Okay.
06:08Okay.
06:09All right.
06:10I'm sorry.
06:11I'm sorry.
06:12I'm sorry.
06:13Oh, shit.
06:14Oh, my God.
06:15I'm sorry.
06:16Don't.
06:17Don't.
06:18I'm sorry.
06:19Go another way, Mike.
06:20Okay.
06:21Okay.
06:22Ma'am, ma'am, are you hurting?
06:23Yes.
06:24Are you in pain?
06:25I don't know.
06:26Do you have a mirror?
06:27No.
06:28Yes, you do.
06:29I got some St. John's wort for pain relief if you want it.
06:30I don't want to take medication.
06:31No, it's herbal.
06:32It's from the earth.
06:33All right.
06:34You can take like six.
06:35It won't affect you.
06:36Look at that.
06:37God.
06:38Ow.
06:40Okay.
06:43Okay.
06:44Hi.
06:45The vice president apologizes, but she's slightly delayed.
06:50She's stuck on a call with the Australian ambassador.
06:54The Australian ambassador?
06:56That's good.
06:57I've never heard that one before.
06:58Sidney Purcell, always a pleasure, sir.
07:00No, it's not, actually, but you get marks for trying.
07:03The vice president is great spirit.
07:06She's buoyantly waiting to meet you all, and I will go check, see if I can interrupt that
07:11call.
07:12Like I said, it's a call.
07:15Strength is being flexible and steadfast.
07:19The living willow, not the dead oak.
07:22I learned in Iraq that the road to respect between me and my men ran two ways.
07:28In order to get respect, you have to give respect.
07:32When I look out, I see many faces, but I see only one nation with one aspiration,
07:38and that aspiration is to one day hope to dream together.
07:43I met a young woman named Juanita in St. Paul the other day, and I asked her, you know what
07:51she said to me?
07:54Oh, Dan?
07:55This is awkward.
07:56I'm catching your sister's eye at an orgy.
07:58Well, my sister would never be at an orgy.
08:00Too uptight.
08:01She would want health records from everyone and just kill the momentum.
08:04Okay.
08:05I'm disappointed in you.
08:06This is the kind of behavior I would expect from myself, but from you, uh-uh.
08:09Let's cut the crap.
08:10We're both here for John.
08:11So we both jump together.
08:12Butch and Sundance.
08:13Don't they both die?
08:14No, not when they jump.
08:15They die at the end.
08:16Oh.
08:17Hey, Sue.
08:18Dan, the vice president just walked through a glass door.
08:25She walked through a glass door?
08:27What is that, code?
08:28No.
08:29Unfortunately, it is not, Dan.
08:30It is a literal description of what just happened.
08:32And she's not too badly hurt, thanks for asking.
08:35She walked through a glass door.
08:37Yeah, that woman has become a living metaphor of her own career.
08:43Just make sure you rest today, okay?
08:45I feel like one of those old, used footballs that they fixed up for the kids at an orphanage.
08:51Good to see you've calmed down.
08:55Ma'am, plenty of rest and no 10K run tomorrow.
08:57Okay?
08:59I don't know about that.
09:00Hey.
09:01Hi.
09:02Uh, we told everyone you were delayed, but we're going to have to cancel this thing,
09:06okay?
09:07No, Mike.
09:08What are you talking about?
09:09I can't cancel my destiny.
09:10Ma'am, look at you.
09:11You're wearing a robe.
09:12Unless you want to go down there and sing the chorus of Look at Me, I'm Sandra Dee,
09:15you can't go downstairs.
09:16Okay.
09:17I'll go ahead and go.
09:18Thank you very much for your help.
09:21Want some word?
09:22Oh, yes.
09:23Good.
09:24What would I even say?
09:25We'll just tell them what happened and reschedule.
09:28Oh.
09:29Jesus.
09:30Oh, God.
09:31I'm canceling.
09:32I'm canceling.
09:38Okay, where is she?
09:39I don't know.
09:40I guess we just followed the trail of her blood and Gary's tears.
09:43Huh.
09:44Oh, hey.
09:45How bad is she?
09:46She's fine.
09:47It's just superficial cuts.
09:48Did you give her any painkillers or?
09:50You know, I didn't want to do that because she's already on St. John's Wort.
09:53I think I got that off a Catholic schoolgirl once.
09:55So why can't she take anything else?
09:57Well, it can react badly with the body if she's already on immunosuppressants, beta
10:01blockers, or antidepressants.
10:02Oh, okay.
10:03Fine.
10:04She's not on any of those.
10:05I've really got to go.
10:06I'll catch you guys later.
10:07Yep.
10:08Yep.
10:10Well, she is on antidepressants.
10:11Yep.
10:12After you.
10:13See?
10:14You made that look so easy.
10:15Hey, I'm sorry this isn't the presidential suite, ma'am.
10:18Oh, it doesn't matter, Gary.
10:21Who has the presidential suite?
10:24I heard Russell Crowe.
10:26Russell Crowe.
10:27Gladiator.
10:28Yep.
10:29I'll be back.
10:32You know who would love this room?
10:33Who?
10:34Ben.
10:35Yeah, yeah, yeah.
10:36Can you imagine him in this with his big mug?
10:38Yep, yep.
10:39Walking around.
10:40He'd love that.
10:51Come and sit here.
10:53Okay, that's nice.
10:54Yeah.
10:56I don't really know anything about you, you know?
10:58You're kind of a mystery man.
11:00Ooh.
11:01Hmm.
11:02Where'd you grow up?
11:05Birmingham, Alabama.
11:06You did not.
11:07I did, too.
11:08I did.
11:09Are you close to your parents?
11:12Close to my mom.
11:13My dad always wanted a man for a son, so.
11:16Oh, yeah.
11:17But it's a different generation.
11:18It is a different generation.
11:19It's true.
11:20They're about to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary.
11:23Oh.
11:24They're going to have a huge blowout.
11:26What do you mean?
11:27Like a party?
11:28Massive party.
11:29Massive.
11:30Oh.
11:31Yeah, yeah, yeah.
11:32It's really.
11:33Can I come?
11:34What?
11:35Can I come?
11:36Are you serious?
11:37Is that completely inappropriate for me to invite myself?
11:40Oh, my God, no.
11:42No.
11:43They would, I would love that.
11:46Are you kidding?
11:47Really?
11:48Yes.
11:50That would solve all my validation issues with my dad.
11:54Ma'am, how are you?
11:56Look, Amy, watch this.
11:58Look how tiny I can make myself.
12:00Watch this.
12:01But the donor meeting has been canceled, yes?
12:06I'm not doing that thing.
12:07Seriously, screw all those people.
12:09God, I hope Iran drops a nuke on D.C.
12:13Wouldn't that solve a lot of issues?
12:15Except Kent wouldn't go anywhere.
12:17He'd still be around.
12:18It's like an undead cockroach with his.
12:21It's true.
12:22He's got that blank look.
12:24I bet he doesn't even have a cum face.
12:28Can you imagine fucking that guy?
12:32Amy, you have such pretty blonde hair.
12:36Doesn't she?
12:37So pretty.
12:42Hi, everyone.
12:43Good morning again.
12:44Unfortunately, the vice president is still stuck on a phone call with Australia.
12:48So she's going to have to postpone this morning's meet and greet breakfast.
12:52We're very sorry.
12:53Mike, you know, in the southern hemisphere, the bullshit actually flows the other way.
12:58Did you know that?
12:59The Australia thing is real.
13:01Yeah.
13:02What the fuck?
13:03Okay, listen to me.
13:04There's been an incident with the vice president.
13:06Can you keep this under wraps?
13:08Yeah, what?
13:09She's walked through a glass door.
13:11She walked through a glass door?
13:13What, she just stumbled into a solid piece of glass?
13:15Yes.
13:19That's amazing.
13:23I guess it's funny.
13:24Funny because we've all done it at one point.
13:26I haven't.
13:28I pushed someone through a plate glass door once.
13:30That was fucking hilarious.
13:32Stop laughing.
13:34Is she okay?
13:36Just cuts.
13:38You are liaison to the VP, right?
13:40That's your liaison debt?
13:42I was born to liaise, sir.
13:44Then why can't you tell me about what the VP was doing when she walked into a glass fucking door?
13:50Okay, well, the VP's office can be very insubordinate.
13:54I mean, they insubordinate all the time.
13:56You know that they call me Jonad?
13:58I mean, that is tantamount to calling the president Jonad.
14:02No, it's not.
14:04He's the president.
14:05You're Jonad.
14:06Now get in there and liaise the truth at a sue, or I'll make sure that name sticks so hard it ends up on your gravestone.
14:11Yes, sir.
14:15Hello there, Susan.
14:17Name's not Susan. It's Sue, Jonad.
14:19Okay, and my name isn't Jonad.
14:21It's Jonah.
14:23Do not disrespect me on this, Sue.
14:25Whoa, whoa, whoa.
14:27No one here is disrespecting you, Jonad.
14:29Now go earn your name change.
14:33Sue.
14:35Sir.
14:37What was the vice president doing at that hotel this morning?
14:39Meet and greet with the American Teachers Association.
14:44If I called the ATA, they would confirm that she was meeting and greeting them?
14:50Couldn't say.
14:52If you can't tell me what she was doing, maybe you can tell me what she wasn't doing.
14:59The vice president was not at a brunch with campaign donors.
15:04I would hope that she was not.
15:08Otherwise, I'm not sure if I wouldn't be within my rights not to launch a drone strike right now.
15:15I got lost in the double negative, sir.
15:17What?
15:19I'm fucking furious.
15:21Jonad.
15:23Yes, sir.
15:25Get over that hotel. Cut your face off and give it to the VP if you have to.
15:27Just get her to talk to the press.
15:29Say she is not the challenger.
15:31I won't let you down, sir.
15:33Hey.
15:35Yeah.
15:37We'll dance. We'll get our dance on.
15:41Dance on.
15:46Why are you guys so tense? She's completely chilled.
15:48She's out of her fucking mind.
15:50She's coming to my parents' 40th wedding anniversary.
15:52Yeah, exactly, Gary.
15:54She's out of her fucking mind.
15:56Hey, ma'am.
15:58I canceled the donor breakfast, but I did have to come clean about you walking through the glass door.
16:02Great job, asshat.
16:04Now everyone's gonna know.
16:06Now everyone's gonna find out she walked through a glass door, Dan,
16:08because she looks like she walked through a fucking glass door.
16:10Yeah, check this out.
16:12What's his problem?
16:14I don't know.
16:16Get over here, gingerbread.
16:18You know what? That St. John's what you gave her is reacting to her antidepressants.
16:20What are you talking about?
16:22It's herbal.
16:24It's from the earth.
16:26Solar mushrooms.
16:28Okay, that's illegal drugs.
16:30Feel this.
16:32The guns?
16:34Wow, you're in a good mood.
16:36I am.
16:38How are you doing?
16:40So-so, you know. Not great, but trying to keep things at an even keel.
16:42Hey, what about that boat of yours?
16:44I can't sell it. Nobody wants to buy her.
16:46How much do you want for her?
16:48Honestly?
16:50It would take half just to get rid of the damn thing.
16:52I'll give you all of it.
16:54You really want to buy my boat?
16:56Yeah.
16:58Shake on it, Magic Mikey.
17:00You're gonna buy my boat?
17:02I'm just gonna go.
17:04Mike, you're needed in here.
17:06I'm coming.
17:08There's fucking press fans outside, Mike.
17:10You better hope Russell Crowe's threatening to jump.
17:12All right, look.
17:14We're gonna have to get her downstairs for an appearance.
17:16Otherwise, they're gonna start speculating.
17:20Look.
17:22She is fucking high right now.
17:32Yeah.
17:34You didn't happen to notice
17:36that the beep is tripping balls?
17:38Gary gave her something that is reacting
17:40with her antidepressants and turning her into
17:42Julie Andrews.
17:44Look, we just need to keep her here
17:46until this thing passes.
17:48What if we pump her stomach?
17:50I've had my stomach pumped before. I think I can figure it out.
17:52Knock, knock. J-Rock o'clock.
17:54Yeah, is somebody here to boom service?
17:56As a senior White House official,
17:58I am commandeering this situation, Mike.
18:00All right, what do you guys got for me?
18:02Okay, she just walked through a glass door,
18:04which is somewhat ironic, building up to an invisible primary,
18:06and she is temporarily insane
18:08on a cocktail of happy pills.
18:10Over to you, Captain.
18:12You just broke his brain, Amy.
18:14Jesus, look at her stupid
18:16gaping mouth. Let's put stuff in it.
18:18Okay.
18:20Decision. Listen up.
18:22The veep will make a statement.
18:24She will make this statement on camera,
18:26and she will make this statement as soon as
18:28possible.
18:30What in the hell is your problem, Andrew?
18:32What?
18:34What are you looking at me like that for?
18:36You...
18:38Huh?
18:40You called me Andrew.
18:42No, I did not.
18:44I know who you are.
18:46I can even say your name the other way.
18:48Hannah Oje.
18:54Academically, Amy,
18:57what's your first move here?
18:59Mike, go talk to the press.
19:01Yeah, Mike, go talk to the press.
19:03I'll tag team with you.
19:05Gary, go get her some clothes.
19:07Yeah, Gary, go get her some fucking clothes, huh?
19:09Come on, it's time to dress up and fess up.
19:11Go, go, go.
19:13Gotta say, I think I handled that pretty well.
19:15Something so sexy
19:17about being in a hotel
19:19in the middle of the day, right?
19:21You have four people to one toilet.
19:23You can hear everything that hits the water.
19:25Who the fuck are you?
19:27Picking cotton to weave?
19:29Amy, I can't find anything to cover up.
19:31She doesn't have any turtlenecks.
19:33I've narrowed it down to four looks.
19:35Just get back here.
19:37Amy, Amy, Amy, Amy, give me a number
19:39between one and four, please.
19:41What?
19:43Give me a number between one and four, please.
19:45Four.
19:47I think I prefer three.
19:49A fucking three, then.
19:51Actually, four is good.
19:53Who could challenge this president?
19:55Well, at the moment, the names we're hearing...
19:57Okay, it has been three hours.
19:59I need her on television now.
20:01I need to draw you a line graph, Jonah.
20:03More time equals less cuckoo.
20:05We need to take a cold dump on the speculation.
20:07Is she the mystery challenger who's going to throw her hat
20:09into the ring to challenge POTUS in two years?
20:11We need to send the message that the ring
20:13is a hat-free zone.
20:15No berets, no Stetsons,
20:17no beanies, no...
20:19Why are you just listing hats?
20:21Jonah's right.
20:23I've got to put my face out there, my fucked-up face.
20:25I feel so good.
20:27I had such a deep sleep.
20:29Looks like I'll just be sitting over here being right.
20:31Yeah, in 700 days of working with her,
20:33she's been right once.
20:35Sit like a gentleman, please.
20:37Oh, my God.
20:39Can you, Mike?
20:41Okay, everyone, the Vice President.
20:43Madam Vice President.
20:45Please, give her some space.
20:47Hi, guys.
20:49I'm sorry for keeping you waiting.
20:51I'm fine.
20:53I didn't want you to think I'm hiding anything
20:55because that's not my style.
20:57Um, what happened is that I, um,
20:59I walked through a glass door
21:01and, um, the only thing that's really hurt
21:03is my pride.
21:05Were there any mitigating circumstances?
21:07Carpeting or...
21:09Was there carpeting there, Mike?
21:11Yes, there was.
21:13It has been confirmed that there was carpeting there.
21:15You will be doing the Get Moving Run tomorrow, correct?
21:17I fully intend to run.
21:19Oh, no.
21:21That's a fucking wire brushed
21:23on my hemorrhoids.
21:25Thank you, ma'am.
21:27So she's either crazy
21:29or she's starting a presidential campaign.
21:31Yeah, I'd say the two are synonymous.
21:33I intend to run?
21:35Yes, sir.
21:37The 10K.
21:39Fix it or I'll liaise your balls to your desk.
21:41Yes, sir, and thank you for your continued trust...
21:43He's gone.
21:45Amy? Amy? Amy? Okay, Amy.
21:47Uh, she needs to run tomorrow
21:49to magic away any presidential speculation, okay?
21:51She can't do the fun run.
21:53She can barely do a convincing walk at the moment.
21:55Okay, can and will.
21:57Can't and won't.
21:59Now go up and screw a pillow.
22:01The room's paid for.
22:04I'm from Taiwan. So good.
22:06What? Come here.
22:08What?
22:18What the fuck?
22:20Why are you laughing?
22:22I love cartoons.
22:24Jesus.
22:26That's you, Gary.
22:28Shut up.
22:30That doesn't even look like the Leviathan.
22:32Your delay in facing the press has raised speculation
22:34on your long-term health.
22:36What?
22:38They're asking if you're up to the job, ma'am.
22:40Am I up to the job?
22:42Oh, jeez.
22:44The leg thing?
22:46Yeah. Seriously, I'm totally overqualified for this job.
22:48Stop it.
22:50Stop what?
22:52Nothing. These flowers came for you
22:54from the Secretary of Defense Maddox.
22:56Oh, let's see.
22:58Good luck with your fun run.
23:00The starter pistol goes off.
23:02Come on.
23:04He's just a varicose dick vein.
23:06Can't stand that guy.
23:08All right, let's go, guys.
23:10Well, I went to a Mexican karaoke restaurant
23:12and I did Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen.
23:14Oh, no, you didn't.
23:16I did, and I changed the Hallelujah
23:18to jalapeno.
23:20Oh, I can imagine.
23:22That was very funny, sir.
23:24Oh, Christ.
23:26It's the committee.
23:28Yeah, I think that's gonna be fine, sir.
23:30Yeah, of course you do, Jonah.
23:32You don't get to complexity.
23:34You're the world's biggest single-cell organism.
23:36Hey, Amy,
23:38you know Schmidt at the State Department?
23:40He's a whistleblower.
23:42Yeah, POTUS is gonna be up
23:44Schitt's Creek, and I am not
23:46hanging around to be his fucking paddle.
23:48I'm not.
23:50It's not coming to that, ma'am.
23:52We don't know.
23:54All I'm saying is that there are gonna be
23:56less choice choices, except more important,
23:58because it's gonna be about me.
24:00Well, hey there!
24:10All right!
24:12Great!
24:14Okay, she is definitely
24:16wearing too much makeup.
24:18She looks like Marcel Marceau.
24:20Yeah, you couldn't tell the difference between real glass
24:22and air, either.
24:24Come on, that's fucking funny.
24:28Wait, I'm scared.
24:30Yeah.
24:32Oh, shit.
24:34Let's do it!
24:36Yeah, I see you!
24:38I see you! Let's get moving!
24:40Oh, Christ.
24:42Did we warn her one of the Get Moving Ambassadors
24:44was a one-legged veteran?
24:46He's behind her. She's never gonna see him.
24:48But wait, does it look good,
24:50her beating a one-legged guy like that?
24:52No, it doesn't look good.
24:54Well, I mean, the alternative's a little worse, don't you think?
24:56The key is, we make it look like she could beat the guy,
24:58but then she lets him win.
25:00Yeah, a win-win by losing, that's good.
25:04Hello?
25:06Gary, you need to get her to slow down.
25:08Oh, thank God.
25:10It looks bad if she's beating the disabled guy.
25:12Okay.
25:14Hey, ma'am? Ma'am, you need to slow down.
25:16Why?
25:18It looks bad.
25:21No, your face looks fine.
25:23You're beating a disabled guy.
25:25Oh, come on. Don't be so hard on yourself, Gary.
25:27Oh, God.
25:29I can't stop her.
25:31She's unstoppable.
25:33Dep Sec Schmidt is testifying.
25:35House Judiciary Committee
25:37is discussing an impeachment vote.
25:39Burn everything incriminating, including this building.
25:41Burn all the White House pets,
25:43and then yourselves.
25:45Burn yourselves first.
25:47Jonah, you go down to the race site.
25:49Mr. Vice President says she stands by POTUS.
25:51Mr. Ryan, ensure that the Vice President
25:53does not respond to any questions about the impeachment vote.
25:55Those are contradictory orders.
25:57No, you make sure that she stands up
25:59and she shifts back.
26:01Refuses to engage at all.
26:03Okay, so I should pick a fucking side.
26:05Use your judgment.
26:07Sir, that's not my strongest suit.
26:09Oh, Christ. Schmidt at the State Department
26:11just pushed a button.
26:13The Judiciary Committee says he's agreed to testify.
26:15Okay, get me Gary again.
26:17Hey, you know what? Pull over here.
26:19Could this go to an impeachment vote?
26:21All right, look, you guys go ahead.
26:23We're gonna make sure Gary keeps up with us.
26:25Okay, okay. Gary! Gary!
26:27Gary, come here! Gary!
26:29As soon as she crosses the finish line,
26:31the process is gonna be all over.
26:33All right, so what do we say? Hang on, hang on.
26:35I don't know. Fuck it, we gotta go.
26:37No, come on, man. Come on! Fuck! Gary!
26:39Gary?
26:41What? What?
26:43The Judiciary Committee is talking impeachment vote.
26:45We need to give her a response.
26:47I'm way behind. If I keep talking, I'm gonna vomit.
26:49Jonah?
26:51Yeah, what's up, you fucking Lorax?
26:53Hey, Dan.
26:55You're trying to get a statement to the Veep?
26:57It's this. Full commitment to the President.
26:59Total backing.
27:01No, no, no. She'll support him, but she will not back him.
27:03He's too toxic.
27:05No. Full backing. Full support.
27:07Oh, God, this zipper's like a cheese grater
27:09on my dick.
27:11Ha ha! Lorax!
27:13So, which one of us do you think
27:15Andre the Giant Jagoff
27:17is gonna obey?
27:19Jonah?
27:21A hundred bucks says you.
27:23Really? He's an idiot.
27:25I'm surprised he gets to work without being hit by a car
27:27or punched in the mouth.
27:29Hi! Excuse me.
27:31Ma'am, Amy says
27:33I give my support to the President
27:35in this very challenging time.
27:37And besides, it's important to respect the process
27:39of the hearing. She needs a get-out.
27:41It's cut to the chase, Amy. I'm being overtaken
27:43by a banana.
27:45Oh, my God.
27:47Ma'am! Ma'am, I need you to speed up or slow down.
27:49We can't have you in a photo finished with a banana.
27:51Yeah.
27:53It's a caption cut that's waiting to happen.
27:55Yeah, I'm not gonna get beaten by a banana.
28:05Well done!
28:07Thank you!
28:09It's worth that considering, huh?
28:11Feels good to get moving, guys.
28:13Oh, my God. Gets the blood pumping.
28:15You know, the, uh...
28:17The key, really, folks,
28:19to a healthy lifestyle is
28:21exercising well.
28:23Any comment on the impeachment rumors?
28:25I have, of course, given my full account
28:27of what I knew.
28:29And...
28:31And now, I'm sure
28:33the President will do the same.
28:35That's all you got.
28:37That's it!
28:39Come on. Put your hands above your head.
28:41Get them up.
28:43Come on, honey. Let's go.
28:45Well done, ma'am.
28:47I am done. Mm-hmm.
28:49Yes, ma'am, you're all done.
28:51I mean, I am done. I am done with all of it.
28:53The Vice Presidency, I mean. Forget it.
28:55Seriously, Amy.
28:57You can see what's coming.
28:59Can't you?
29:01He's gonna implicate me in all of this.
29:03All of it.
29:06And then it's gonna be two years
29:08of standing next to this man
29:10that I loathe.
29:12Is this just the
29:14St. John's war talking?
29:16Look at me. I'm covered in scabs.
29:18I smell like a
29:20hobo's crap hole.
29:22Forget it. Forget it.
29:24I'm not gonna
29:26run with him in two years.
29:28I'm not gonna be his Vice President.
29:30I'm finished.
29:32I'll come back in six years
29:34and I'll save the party from itself.
29:36Hey, do you know what my time was,
29:38by the way? Uh, what's good?
29:40Like an eight-minute mile.
29:42That. Yeah? Yeah, let's
29:44get moving!
29:46Oh.
29:48Oh, my God.
29:50That was really rough.
29:54Hey, Mike, I have
29:56some sort of hazy memory
29:58of me
30:00promising to buy your...
30:02Was it your boat?
30:04Yeah, you did, but
30:06well-remembered. That's not gonna happen.
30:08You can't hold me to that, right?
30:10Yeah. No.
30:12Sure. Of course.
30:14Man, that is low.
30:16It's like trying to have sex
30:18with somebody who's passed out.
30:20Hey, ma'am.
30:22About
30:24my parents' party...
30:26What? I thought your parents
30:28were dead. No.
30:30Yeah.
30:34It's their 40th wedding
30:36anniversary and you wanted to come
30:38and we were gonna go dancing
30:40and, you know, it's gonna be
30:42a big blowout. Okay.
30:44I'm the vice president of the United States.
30:46Yeah. You know, I can't be
30:48running off to shindigs
30:50put on by the parents of people
30:52on my staff. Yeah. You know, I mean,
30:54that's completely... Yeah.
30:56Absurd, you know? Yeah.
30:58You've never even mentioned
31:00your parents before. I've just always assumed
31:02that they were dead. Right. I mean, why wouldn't
31:04I make that assumption, right? Why wouldn't I, right?
31:06Yeah, totally, yeah.
31:08Guys, back up for a second here.
31:10Your parents were not dead. No.
31:12Mm-mm. It's so funny that
31:14you thought that they were, too. Yeah.
31:16I thought you were adopted.