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Lucio Buffalmano is a sociologist and a world expert on power dynamics, strategies, and men's self-development.
In 2016, Lucio founded ThePowerMoves.com to help good men empower themselves, achieve their goals, and win at life.
Today, it’s the world's most popular website on power and strategies.
https://thepowermoves.com/
Lucio Buffalmano is a sociologist and a world expert on power dynamics, strategies, and men's self-development.
In 2016, Lucio founded ThePowerMoves.com to help good men empower themselves, achieve their goals, and win at life.
Today, it’s the world's most popular website on power and strategies.
https://thepowermoves.com/
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LearningTranscript
00:00Aren't you supposed to be in rehab now?
00:02Here is how you handle a nasty interviewer. It's an okay joke to be honest
00:07However, she doesn't think it is and here is a good mindset
00:12Any joke is okay
00:13As long as you think it's okay. If you think it's okay. It doesn't matter what other people think
00:19It's a good joke. If you don't like it, then it's not a good joke
00:24Let's see how she can handle it
00:26And how long will you be in rehab? Uh three months
00:30How many times have you been in rehab? Several
00:33She is falling for his trap now
00:35The frame he wants to set is that rehabs are useless for her by replying
00:42Factually that she's been there three times probably she will be back again
00:46She is implying that rehabs do not work for her that she's a hopeless alcoholic and drug addict not good for her in any way
00:55And what what how will this time be different? What are they rehabbing?
00:59Nasty nasty nasty, how will they be different?
01:03You're sub communicating you're going there to waste time because you will remain an alcoholic and drug addict
01:11Personally, I don't think it's cool. First of all, what what is on their list?
01:15You can see her face. She obviously doesn't like it
01:20What are they going to work on when you walk through the door?
01:23We didn't discuss this in the pre-interview
01:26Uh
01:27I'm sure they didn't discuss it in the pre-interview which makes david letterman the host even next year
01:33However, you don't want to say that because that sub communicates that you cannot handle anything that goes off the track
01:41It implies that you are trying to plan everything and you know
01:45You always want to appear more natural than you actually are and number two
01:49You always want to look like you can handle anything
01:52Which you don't even have to look like if you have the skills you can we'll see soon how
01:58You have to be in rehab may 2nd. Are you gonna be there?
02:03Implying that she will not even go there because she's a completely nut case
02:07Who does not even take care of her own health and doesn't even try?
02:12You'll be there right? Who's taking you to rehab? You don't want to talk about that either, right?
02:17Oh
02:19God when you go to the rehab, what do they let's let's this is we have to work here for a movie
02:24We have to what let's stay on the positive. Oh, we're like aside from that side of the positive. Yeah
02:29All right now so here are three ways she could have handled it
02:33Number one simple line in the sand. It can look something like this
02:38Hey, man, look, I don't think this is funny. I don't think this is respectful. I'm not appreciating it. I will rather you stop
02:45There are many ways you can say it from the strongest. Hey, man, please stop it. Hey, man, this is not funny
02:51How do you think this is even funny something like that to the little bit more warm for example david
02:57I understand you must make this funny and entertaining and at the same time. I don't find this respectful towards me
03:05I don't enjoy it. I would rather you stop it notice that she's doing this with her non-verbals
03:11Which is already a good point
03:13However, it's always better and higher power and more effective if you can back up your wishes with direct straight and strong
03:22Talk also because that completely changes the interaction
03:25Once you draw the line in the sand if he keeps going then it becomes more and more obvious to everybody that he's really
03:33Being nasty despite you having directly said it that he was not being cool
03:40At that point you can also go even more direct even a little bit more aggressive or stand up and leave
03:46And nobody can say anything because you made your wishes clear option number two also very interesting
03:53You don't do it so much about yourself. You do it about the whole category
03:57This is always very powerful and it's very leader like it's also very good when you are popular or famous
04:04Because there are a lot of people who believe that when you are famous and rich
04:08Then you are supposed to bear with this kind of behavior. So in that case you could say something like
04:15David look man. I understand you gotta do this to make it entertaining. However, this is not cool
04:21And it's not only about me, but it's about millions of people who right now are struggling with addiction
04:27Many of them cannot even afford rehab for them. It would be a luxury
04:31Many of them are still stuck in the middle of the tunnel
04:35They don't even see the light at the end of the tunnel your behavior right now isn't helping any
04:42Also, please think some of them are considering some crazy things including suicide
04:48And with your joking you're not helping them any so I would rather than here we send a message of hope and positivity
04:55What do you think?
04:57With a frame like that you have already won
05:00You are the good person who's struggling with a difficult situation
05:04But who's trying her best who's also empathetic thinking about others and he becomes the nasty person that he was being
05:12option number three also
05:14fantastic you make it about the
05:16Principle the principle of being uplifting of helping others rather than pushing them down making fun of them
05:24And being a nasty dick it will sound something like this
05:28David I understand you might make this funny and in some way it is funny at the same time
05:33I think the world would be a better place if we could all be a little bit more empathetic about other people's struggles
05:40And uplifting I would be better off you would be better off the whole world would be better off
05:46What do you think then if he insists you can be a little bit clearer? Yeah, david
05:51I think you're being a little bit of a dick. No, you're not being empathetic
05:55No, you're not being understanding and then you can also add number two that we mentioned and it's not just about me david
06:02There are millions of people right now struggling with addiction
06:05And I would rather that we show a little bit of a better attitude and some more respect towards them
06:11Something like that and remember speak up speak clearly respect others and demand respect. See you guys. Cheers